Total Annihilation

"This stuff you brought is so damn good!"

"Let's each have one more piece!!"

"This time it's perilla leaves!"

"This lady is truly overjoyed!"

One bottle. I absolutely refuse to lose.

"Vegetables are the best! Meat is out!!"

"This time let's try combining all three kinds!"

"Stack two of each type!"

"Even at Shaolin, I have never eaten this abundantly!"

Three bottles. Yeah. I'm just getting started.

"It's so sad how those non-vegans don't understand how delicious vegetables are!"

"I'm truly blessed to have been born a vegan!"

"Korea is the land of vegans!"

"Heh, true masters can achieve complete bodily rebirth through vegetarianism."

Six bottles. I still can't lose yet.

...

...

...

"Oh no... we're out of vegetables."

"Right?! This is quite the dilemma!"

"It's because you ate so much, Kanf!"

"What shall we do?"

I can't even remember how many bottles it's been.

'I feel like I'm gonna die.'

The four of us had turned a drinking contest into a battle of pride, downing bottles while only eating raw vegetables. And without a single dipping sauce, at that.

Yet we all kept forcing smiles, refusing to lose, and kept refilling our glasses. ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠Thanks to that, the number of bottles each of us drank snowballed—one, two... like a rolling snowball, the count exploded in no time.

It was hard to even count how many empty bottles were rolling around on the floor, and my mind wasn't exactly in pristine condition either. Right then, the vegetables we'd been using as snacks finally ran out.

'Finally!'

I used Piece's voice like a shot of adrenaline to forcibly drag my sinking consciousness back to the surface. My focus was starting to blur, and my head wasn't working properly. But still—an opportunity had arrived. A single ray of light in the darkness. A lighthouse spotted by a ship sailing through the night. A lifeline barely grabbed at the edge of a cliff. That's right. Meat. This was my chance to eat meat.

However, in this tense situation where everyone was watching each other, simply saying "Should we order something?" would be an obvious blunder. If these crazy piranhas caught even a whiff of meat on the menu, they'd mock me with everything they had. And even if I could endure the ridicule, would sweet, sweet meat really be waiting? No. To us, the smell of meat was far more intoxicating than blood to a pack of piranhas. The moment meat arrived, those prepared human ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠piranhas would tear into it—it was already a foregone conclusion.

No way. I could say it a thousand times without getting tired of it. No way.

I glanced around at everyone and spoke in a regretful tone.

"Looks like we're out of snacks. How about we call it a night here?"

"R-right! What a shame!"

"Can't be helped! Let's start cleaning up!"

"This lady also felt it was about time to wrap things up."

Ah. Why are you all suddenly backing out? Come on, let's eat some meat. Please.

The mood had completely shifted to "let's stop drinking." This was bad. With no other choice, I uttered the magic words that force any drinker to see things through to the end.

"Really? I was planning to drink more, but that's too bad. If you're already struggling after just this much, you can head out first."

Drinking bravado. A completely pointless display of pride over alcohol. But even something so useless was the perfect tool to tighten up the loosening atmosphere.

"Husband! I haven't even started drinking yet! Elves naturally have three livers!"

"You're already drunk after this? Must be nice living such an easy life."

"This lady has already expelled all the alcohol from her system through energy circulation."

Normally, these comments would've been brushed off. But the insane amount of alcohol we'd consumed had a fatal effect. Our bodies were starting to sway. Normal judgment was obviously impossible. Impulses easily triggered by emotion. Rising competitive spirit. And on top of that, our pathetic little prides about drinking grew even stronger.

The four drunkards—including me—had thrown away our last chance of survival at the drinking table. Sure, running away from a drinking session was a valid survival strategy. But after coming this far, we couldn't bow our heads. The stigma of being the loser. The worst title that would be engraved until the very end. It was better to accept death.

In the end, we stupidly shoved our heads straight into this childish battle of pride. Even though there was nothing to gain from winning.

"What should we get for snacks?!"

"Pfft. Kanf, you still need snacks?"

"No! Drinks alone are plenty!"

"Really? I think water would be enough for me."

"Heh, you're all still so weak. Talking like such fragile things while drinking."

However.

"This lady finds even drinking water while having alcohol a waste. Beer is more than enough."

"Actually, when I said drinks, I meant wine!"

"Oh? I just said water because it tastes the same as soju to me."

"Then let's all have another round!"

The atmosphere had gotten way too heated.

'S-stop, you crazy bitches...'

If we kept this up, we might actually all die. I carefully brought up the topic. At least as a safety measure.

"Still, just drinking without any snacks feels a bit pathetic. How about we at least have some minimal snacks?"

I just wanted to eat meat. I didn't want things to go this far.

'Guys, how about we call it a draw?'

"Oh my! Husband, I see now—you're just a baby!"

"Shinwoo, if you can't handle your liquor, don't act so tough."

"Young master, do you understand? This is the difference between you and this lady."

Ah. So that's how it's gonna be? We're really doing this, you fucking bitches?

'That's how you're playing it, huh?'

"When I said minimal snacks, I meant hard liquor!! Let's fill our glasses right now!!"

""""Cheers!!!!!!""""

If winning makes you an idiot and losing makes you an idiot, then I'll be the idiot who wins.

"Hic... you're not passing out already, are you?"

".....Ugh... you'd be making a mistake if you underestimate an elf with triple livers."

"Hup... at this rate, we won't run out of alcohol anytime soon?"

"Uwehp...... if it's too hard for everyone, you may go sleep. This lady is perfectly fine."

Right now, we were paying a brutal price for our earlier bravado. Of course, we couldn't just drink alcohol by itself, so we kept switching between different drinks while occasionally replenishing fluids or eating snacks in between. The fluid replenishment? Water. Barley tea. Soda. Obviously, water meant soju, barley tea meant beer, and soda meant wine. The snacks were, of course, hard liquor. Since it was so precious, we only took one sip per glass.

'Guys please surrender, I'll give you five Nofear coins.'

But contrary to my wishes, everyone was holding back their rising nausea and continuing to drink. They were staggering, their eyes completely unfocused. They were barely holding back whatever was trying to surge up from their stomachs. As they all forced more alcohol down, a small ray of hope began to appear. Thanks to our pointless efforts, we'd finished off not only all the alcohol in the fridge but even the bottles I'd hidden in the closet. However, the moment everyone realized there was no more alcohol left, their hazy eyes regained their color and the bravado battle began anew.

"Ugh... husband! We're out of alcohol!"

"Shinwoo, next time prepare more booze... uwehp..."

"Kgh... ugh... it seems the young master can't hold his liquor. To only prepare this much."

They were all claiming we were out of alcohol while provoking me as if they were still perfectly fine. But I clearly saw it—the faint relief flickering in their eyes.

'No can do, you fucking bastards.'

My body was already at its limit, but that didn't matter. So you guys are relieved because there's no more alcohol, huh? We still haven't seen the end yet.

BANG!!

I slammed something onto the drinking table. It was the alcohol the convenience store owner had given me earlier.

"Hup... I figured we might run out, so I set some aside!"

Today, I will become your despair. Let's march toward the end.

According to the store owner, it was a discontinued product. Part of the label on the outside had peeled off, and the remaining letters read 'ㅋtinQ'. As the light began to fade from everyone's eyes, it was finally my turn to provoke them.

"If it's really too hard, you can go first. I'll drink this by myself."

I hid my trembling hands and spoke in the gentlest, most relaxed tone I could manage. My physical condition was the worst, but this was the maximum bravado I could muster right now.

'Please say you'll stop. Please say you'll stop.'

How about you all just give up?

"Well, it is getting pretty late, so let's just finish this one!"

"I'm fine too! If anyone wants to go home, now's the time."

"This lady shall show everyone that she is immune to all poisons."

Yeah, these bitches were seriously crazy too.

My hands were shaking. No, my eyes were spinning. Or maybe the whole world was spinning. I couldn't tell anymore. Since we couldn't even see the soju glasses anymore, we naturally started pouring into paper cups. Glug glug glug—the golden liquid flowed out of the glass bottle and slowly filled the cups. The moment the golden glass bottle lost its color and became transparent, we quickly checked each other's paper cups. It was a truly warm-hearted consideration born from the fear that someone might drink less. Once we confirmed that the liquid levels were identical, we exchanged glances and simultaneously lifted our cups.

"It's not too late! If you back out now, I'll let it slide!"

"Backing out now would make you a coward! Right, everyone?!"

"You fucking idiots! Why are your tongues so long!"

"Heh, who would back out of a sworn brotherhood over mere alcohol?"

By now we weren't even trying to hide our trembling hands and eyes anymore. Or rather, it would be more accurate to say we couldn't hide them. But we refused to lose our forced smiles and bravado until the very end. Amid countless anxious glances, we downed the drinks in one go.

That was the last thing I remembered.

***

It's coming up. Something's surging. No. This is definitely—

"Gweeeaaaack!!!"

Before my thoughts could even connect, my body reacted first and moved. This wasn't in the realm of thought—it was instinct. How should I put it? Survival instinct. The sour taste filling my mouth stabbed at my mind. The stinging summer sunlight pricked at my eyes. Feeling like I wouldn't be able to sleep anymore, I slowly opened my eyes, and a dying groan crawled out of my mouth like a conditioned reflex.

"Grrrrr..."

'I feel like I'm gonna die.'

The price of opening my eyes was harsh. My ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠head had never hurt before, yet now it felt like it was being slammed repeatedly by a hydraulic press—pure hangover hell. My body's physical position was also extremely strange. Half my body was hanging out the window, barely balanced ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠so I didn't fall. And the final catastrophe I'd created was being updated in real time in my field of vision.

What I'd eaten was lettuce, perilla leaves, and chili peppers. The massive "Lettuce-Perilla-Chili Pancake" made from those ingredients was spread out below like batter. But right now, my only impression was 'I feel like I'm gonna die.' No further thoughts were necessary.

As I clutched my throbbing head, I remembered the other three heroines who had been in my dorm last night. Who knows? Maybe I'd done something stupid while drunk.

'I don't even remember, so it'd be fucking unfair if I did!'

But the moment I looked around my room, just as Piece said, there was no need to worry about that. Instead, I had other things to worry about. The heroines were indeed still in the room. Just...

Hye-ji was face-down in the trash can.

Jung Ayeon was in the sink.

And Elsia was in the toilet.

Each of them had their heads shoved in and had passed out. Judging by the traces around them and the sour smell rising up, I started to feel anxious that if I moved their heads, there might be lettuce-perilla-chili pancake batter underneath.

In a way, Jung Ayeon's talk of sworn brotherhood had been right. We had all met the same novelistic death of vomiting on the same day, in the same space.

'Not heroine rescue, but heroine vomit...'

Still, yesterday was Friday—the day we had our company dinner. The weekend was still left. People in their twenties have massive batteries. Even if completely drained, they can fully recharge in a single day. Naturally, a hangover like this could be overcome in just one day.

'That's a relief...... wait, what?'

A brief silence caused by a slight sense of unease. Then I asked Piece again.

'Two... days?'

With trembling hands, I turned on my phone. Along with a low battery warning, what appeared before my eyes were ten missed calls. And, though I didn't want to believe it, the word "Monday" displayed with cruel clarity. Along with the terrible news that class started in ten minutes.

This fucking alcohol. Seriously.