Chapter 50
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Translator: Silver Dragon
Chapter: 50
Chapter Title: Exodus
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I'd just heard the full situation from the soccer academy and was on the verge of taking action when even more new articles started flooding in.
[Jesus Joo Soccer School Maintains Silence Amid Controversy Erupting on ○○ Mom Cafe.]
It's only been a day since the controversy blew up, and they're calling it "maintaining silence"? What a joke.
[Madrid Study Abroad Program? Study Abroad Consultancy Claims 'Fees Significantly Higher Than Average Soccer Study Abroad Programs.']
It's an opportunity others would pay through the nose for, and these people are throwing a fit.
['Jesus Joo Profiting Off Kids' Dreams—Wake Up!' Protest by ○○ Association]
[○○ Mom Cafe Members Who Started 'Truth from Jesus Joo' Cafe Demand Answers]
Ah, fuck this. I can't take it anymore.
In my previous life, without knowing about the mission relaxation, I'd somehow gritted my teeth and kept the soccer academy running.
But the current Jesus Joo has no need to hold back.
Time to have eight kids and aim for that Round of 8 ending.
Yu-na's gonna have a tough time with that.
But I'll truly cherish and love her for it.
[National Team Soccer Player Jesus Joo Sues ○○ Cafe Members, Soccer Study Abroad Consultancy, and ○○ Association for Spreading False Information and Defamation.]
I filed the lawsuits and immediately held a video conference to discuss the future of the soccer academy.
"Don't go easy on them. And let's overhaul the academy programs. From now on, we'll only take in kids who genuinely dream of becoming soccer players and charge a modest fee. Now I get why people don't offer free classes.
And expand the education program for orphanage kids who want to be soccer players. It'd be even better to build a new orphanage dedicated to teaching soccer."
My agent, Doo-sik hyung, was of course in on the meeting too.
"Gotta go back to Korea again?"
"If you don't want to, I can get someone else..."
"No way! I'm totally down!! I'll go! But you tell Su-yeon about it."
Kim Doo-sik's sullen face during the meeting lit up in an instant. While he was beaming with happiness, I secretly messaged his wife to set up a family trip.
- Jesus: Doo-sik hyung's heading to Korea on business. Might as well give him some vacation time—go on a family trip.
- Lioness: Oh... Thank you, young master. I'll bring Johan a gift when we visit Spain.
With my tasks done, my mind started wandering.
A lot of people call me crazy sometimes.
But in the village of the one-eyed, having two eyes makes you the freak. No matter how I look at it, isn't it the world that's gone mad, making me seem abnormal?
"Huh. You're here."
"Yeah, jumping right into work, right?"
"..."
As soon as Doo-sik hyung landed in Korea, the articles started pouring in.
[Jesus Joo Soccer Academy Discontinues Free Programs. 'We ran the soccer school to support kids who love soccer and dream of becoming pros. But too many parents were dumping childcare on us, making it unsustainable. Despite this, staff diligently continued, moving talented kids to advanced classes. When we offered Madrid study abroad spots to the standouts, a parent of a non-selected child posted on the cafe—we believe that's how it started.']
Real Hell Joseon right there.
Sorry, hyung Jesus. Even if you can't play for the national team anymore, just naturalize in Spain.
For real. Let's live happily there.
Jesus Joo Soccer Academy profiting off free programs—wake up!
[Real Madrid Youth Director Juan Sarabia Speaks on Controversy: 'Comparing Real Madrid soccer study abroad to Spain's third-division programs is utter bullshit. And most parents coming in compare their kid's talent to Jesus? Does the world's best player look like shit to you?']
LOL kimchi patch complete on the coach.
Language patch glitched lololol
I saw this up close and nearly choked. Some auntie with zero soccer knowledge shows up asking if her kid has talent, how he stacks up to Jesus Joo, if he could be the next Son Heung-min... wtf.
Foreign coach seriously tells the kid no talent, and the uncle next to the auntie starts yelling "Who are you to judge my kid?!" Legendary...
I'm embarrassed for them.
[Jesus Joo Soccer Academy to Charge Fees, Accept Only Kids Dreaming of Pro Soccer Careers.]
Putting emphasis on "paid" like trash journalism class act.
Free until now was the insane part.
Slightly pricier than local academies, but a relief. My son loves soccer and dreams of going pro; was worried when the controversy hit.
Fewer kids means more focused training.
Innocent folks like us suffer because of a few bad apples.
200k a month feels too pricey. Kid loved it, but oh well.
If the kid likes it, just pay the 200k^^ Skip the cafe and you'll save that much^^
...My kid has no talent, IMO?
...Ah you're right, thought it was shade at the academy
But kid loves it, so maybe reconsider... Just hope he doesn't chase empty dreams and insist on soccer only.
Mom Too harsh.
Wish my mom had raised me like that.
??? Sudden filial piety flames here?
If mom hadn't lied saying I was handsome when I'm ugly, I'd have studied hard as a kid
Aww Heaven weeps, this guy's weeping, I'm weeping
Fr, this comment got water falling from the sky lololol Wait, from my eyes?
[Jesus Joo to Build New Type of Orphanage: Soccer Academy for Kids Dreaming of Pro Careers.]
Does Jesus qualify to run an orphanage?
Orphanage director from Jesus's old place will take over.
Most kids from the current orphanage dream of soccer or soccer-related jobs, so they're all moving over together.
Locals are the real legends here.
Before Jesus's World Cup hat-trick, locals protested to move the orphanage cuz land values dropped. Now they're protesting to keep it.
That's just Korean average.
Locals who trashed orphans before now sell Jesus merch calling him their village pride.
Korean average.
...Real Hell Peninsula.
[Freeloading Guilty, Paying Innocent? Jesus Joo Academy Threatens Poor with Lawsuits—Wake Up!]
Why is this reporter such a dick?
LOL this guy's getting sued for trash article without fact-checking lol Check ongoing cases—same reporter starred out in the middle lololol
? How do you check?
I got sued too ffs. Jesus hyung, forgive me once!
What the hell do you have to say to get sued by Jesus hyung.
Spam posted calling him a cliff-dick pervert weirdo;; got deleted.
Should be smashing your head into Yu-na noona, not Jesus hyung?
Yu-na noona sorry! Forgive me once! Yu-na noona's boobs seem bigger!
Lololol hope no extra sexual harassment charges.
Yu-na is an angel! Yu-na is an angel! Yu-na is an angel!
Why is this psycho acting up?
Yu-na who forgave has small boobs but a bountiful heart, an angel!
?? Wanna die? (ಠಠ)
How is this real af?
[30 People Summoned for Police Investigation Over Spreading False Info and Defaming Soccer Player Jesus Joo.]
The lawsuits I filed resulted in over 30 people facing group investigations.
I handed it all over to the lawyers and tuned out. Later, when the verdicts came in: 20 got 6 months suspended for 2 years, 9 got fines, and the worst offender—despite probation—committed another crime and got real jail time.
FYI, that guy was over 40, claimed to be an orphan himself, even posted a dogeza pic on soccer forums begging for mercy. Turns out his parents are alive and well.
Lots of fire-attribute filial sons in this world. Killing off living parents, huh.
Anyway, extra doxxing of sued cafe users floated around online, with talk of secondary harm blah blah. Not my problem?
They sowed karma; they'll reap it.
Point is, I realized I need to raise Johan right so he doesn't turn into a fire-attribute filial son. With Yu-na and me in the top 1% for character, he'll turn out fine, right?
With the lawsuits wrapped up, the Korean incident ended beautifully. Internet users started following netiquette more for a while, apparently.
Around this time, soccer communities buzzed with "Jesus Joo's Exodus," memes about him drawing the sword of law to part the sea of info, and "Jumen" went viral.
[Title: Jumen's Exodus.]
A man stretches his arm toward the Sea of Information. The Constitution summons fierce winds, pushing back and drying the sea. As it parts, the waters shield the good netizens and drown the malicious ones. For a time, the Sea of Information runs clean.
Even AOS players and retro space war gamers praise him and ask his name.
He calls himself Jesus Joo.
Aaah— Jumen….
We believe— Jumen!!
Chat's clean now, feels good to be alive.
Jumen... Savior of Korean soccer and internet culture too...
Downside: more idiots aping "Sue like Jesus" memes ffs
Are you doubting Jumen right now?
Aaah— Heretic.
Execute the heretic….
Padak, block this guy right now….
Ah… Jumen, I handled the heretic.
Lmaoooooooo he actually blocked lolololol
Guy just ranked up lololol
Fr... Solo kill scared me, mental broke, nearly lost promo cuz chat flaming, but clean chat let me recover and promote.
All by the grace of Jumen.
Aaah— Ju-men. We believe!
Champions League
Group Stage Match 4.
Real Madrid (Home) 0 : 0 Roma
Five minutes before kickoff.
I was secretly prepping a selfie celebration that I hadn't done in the last Roma match, without the manager knowing.
"Hey, can you hold onto my phone? Pass it to me if I score?"
"Huh? Sure. But what for?"
"You'll see when I score. Heh."