Chapter 63
Chapter 63
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Translator: MadScientist
Chapter: 63
Chapter Title: You Shouldn't Show 100% of Yourself
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"Calling a streamer whose face and name you don't even know a 'friend'? You guys must really not have many friends, huh."
💬 Live Chat — Viewer Sudden attack? — Viewer Do you know about parasocial relationships? — ??? I'll pay you back for every insult you've thrown so far. — Viewer Friends include internet friends, you know. — Viewer Yeah, you're internet friends with Victory and Wild too. Nice try. — Viewer It's not an attack, it's empathy lololol — Viewer Jeonseol is my friend~ — Viewer Wasn't that jellyfish your face and Jeon Jeonseol your name? Have you been lying to me this whole time? This is really quite mysterious.
Viewers feeling a sense of inner closeness to a streamer? That makes sense.
You watch the stream, learn bits of info about them one by one, and share time together.
This jellyfish model is something I picked out as my representative character.
I just couldn't stomach using a cute girl avatar.
I'm an otaku myself, so it's not like I had some cultural aversion—it's just that acting out a little girl's role felt super off-putting.
Broadcasting with a male voice was way more comfortable. My throat hurt like hell, though.
...
Feels like I went off on a tangent there.
Back to the point.
On the flip side, what does a streamer feel from their viewers?
I don't know where you live, what you look like, what you do for work, or what you're thinking.
People of all ages, appearances, and jobs—lumping them all into one category called 'viewers' doesn't even feel right from the start.
Some hurl harsh words at me, some get mad if the stream doesn't go their way, some unconditionally cheer me on, some donate their own money to encourage me or spam chat every day,
some will forget me after a few days away, others will miss me for a long time...
Treating all these diverse people as one lump sum called 'viewers'—does that even work?
Back in school, I once felt really hurt by a classmate.
After spending time together, they barely remembered anything I'd said.
I tried to brush it off as 'that's just how they are,' but I couldn't shake the thought that if I mattered to them, they'd have remembered.
Forgetting even those little details stung, so how could anyone feel close to streamers who don't even remember your name?
Viewership's at 27,000 now.
Could anyone memorize 27,000 nicknames or details about each person?
Remembering only some would backfire, making others feel left out.
In the end, I can't remember a thing about any of you.
It makes me feel incredibly sad.
When do we get brain digitization?
Just plug in a memory chip, and boom—perfect recall.
"Why do you guys watch my stream?"
You guys.
That's the most I can call you.
Maybe 'dear viewers' at best?
I think I get why fan names exist now.
I tried imagining calling you 'Jeonseol Keepers.'
It's kinda cringy.
Hmm.
💬 Live Chat — Viewer Here it comes, that question. — Viewer Oppa, what do you like about me? — Viewer PTSD ON — Viewer You've never even had a girlfriend, why act like you have PTSD? — Viewer The jellyfish is cute and your voice is adorable. ⭐ Top Comment — Viewer Dog. Plays. Well. That's. Why. — Viewer Victory doesn't stream much. — Viewer The bond of the Magical Girl Alliance is stronger than steel. — Viewer Wanna see how far your shit game love goes lol — Viewer Magical Fight boom is coming! — Viewer I watched the movie 5 times to pull the Venus card too. — Viewer Sis, marry me!!! — Viewer I leave it on as ASMR radio. — Viewer I'm a friendless loser. ⭐ Top Comment — Viewer You're just fun to watch. — Viewer So when are you hitting rank 1, you 10-lose streak? — Viewer Team, stream more. I play games a bit better than average.
That's all I thought my stream was about.
But people gather for all these different reasons.
I was a little surprised.
"Liar, you're just here for the girl vibes."
💬 Live Chat — Viewer Gasp! — Viewer Busted fml — Viewer No? I watched your male voice streams too. — Viewer Kick out all the newbies who joined after finding out you're a girl? — Viewer Pureblood Jeonseol fans only! ⭐ Top Comment — Viewer For real lol I do have some self-awareness.
Friends with Victory and Wild, good at games—those two things alone wouldn't draw this crowd.
A 'girl' with a pretty voice who's suspiciously good at games.
I could roughly guess how big a factor that was.
"I'm kinda bewildered. Hmm... Is it really that much? Enough to pull in crowds like this? Isn't it just novelty drawing people in, and once the hype dies, only a handful will stick around?"
💬 Live Chat — Viewer Every line drips with female essence. — Viewer No no, don't simp to the viewers. — Viewer Jeonseol is just a baby, gotta go uwu uwu ㅠㅠ — Viewer Girl stans GTFO (while girlfriend-moving) ⭐ Top Comment — Viewer Yo. Sa. (Forever love) — Viewer Constantly seeking affection confirmation... this is... — Viewer Female. Behavior. — Viewer Hmm is it really that much No, treating me like some annoying girlfriend.
Don't guys think this way? Isn't it okay to!?
It's natural to wonder why people watch your stream!
"Don't try to pin some weird yandere image on me."
💬 Live Chat — Viewer Says the person who turned on a drunk stream crying at dawn. — Viewer Give lines that match her track record. ⭐ Top Comment — Viewer lolololol [Reminder has donated 1,000 won.] ─"??? : I have no friends. I'm dying of loneliness. Please stay by my side." 💬 Live Chat — Viewer Memory assault for 1k is too much. — Viewer I blacked out so I don't remember. — Viewer You were really bad that time. — Viewer Wooo~ Trash~ "Ughhh, gyahh! Eeeeek!"
💬 Live Chat — Viewer Sounds of agony lololololol — Viewer Please use human language, teacher. — Viewer Is she broken? — Viewer Next, get under the blanket. — Viewer Blanket kick 800 years worth. — Viewer So you'll stream for 800 years then? The frustration of not being able to meet anyone in real life, the stress of doxxing fears.
Couldn't hold back, chugged alone, and ended up with a black history permanently etched forever.
Maybe I'm a little pitiful?
But before pitiful...
My face feels like it's 104°F right now?
"Ahh, I'm quitting streaming and going back to normal life. Thanks for the fun times, everyone. Grateful for the love."
💬 Live Chat — Viewer <-Quitting-> — Viewer Ahh, Jeon Jeonseol service ending. — Viewer Time for reincarnation~ — Viewer Black history so bad you have no choice but to reincarnate. — Viewer Next avatar a cute girl pls. "Wait, I'm quitting, and you're all talking like reincarnation is a given?"
💬 Live Chat — Viewer But you have no friends. — Viewer Fr, what else you gonna do without internet streaming lol — Viewer Hating Jeonseol Keepers so much you're going full reincarnation? Harsh. — Viewer Jeonseol says she'll die if she's lonely! — Viewer You even set up a company—how you gonna run away now? [Editor has donated 1,000 won.] ─"Boss, am I getting fired?" "No, kidding, kidding, kidding—it's an impersonator!"
[Manager has donated 1,000 won.] ─"Am I getting fired too?" "Stop impersonating! Ack! It's the real Manager!?"
💬 Live Chat ⭐ Top Comment — Viewer lololololol — Viewer One shot one kill — Viewer Abandon our manager? Abandon our manager? — Viewer You're not alone anymore! — Viewer Breadwinner girl's sorrow ㄷㄷ — Viewer Time to start capitalist moves? — Viewer Not alone anymore... gasp! — Viewer Get out. — Viewer I haven't even said that word yet? Yeah.
Quitting was a joke, but even if I wanted to quit for real, I've spread the net too wide to escape now.
But why do they think I can't quit because I'm lonely!?
I told you I don't even know if I see you as friends!
'Friends...'
Since ancient times, those you hang out and chat with are called friends.
So are we friends? Is that right?
'Jerks.'
These guys only care about teasing and tormenting others!
Even so, I can't lump them together like that.
'Better as friends than consumer-provider, maybe?'
Person-to-person, genuine connection better than some vague business relation?
But.
'Fake is safe in its fakeness, but real means you get hurt just as deep.'
Pulling away from someone pretending to be a friend versus someone you believed was a real friend—the weight's different.
What if I think they're friends and get betrayed?
What if they all turn their backs and leave me?
I heard somewhere.
Streamers shouldn't show 100% of themselves.
It's bad for both viewers and the streamer.
'Then should I go with the big-boobs gimmick?'
Since you're not supposed to show 100% of yourself.