Tonight, Chwiwharu

I woke ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠up. After drinking myself stupid for the first time in ages, my body felt heavy as lead.

How had I even gotten back yesterday? I definitely made it to the palace with Yu Bi's support, but without so much as telling Yu Hyeop I had returned, I had collapsed straight into sleep.

"Do Yeop, His Majesty summons you."

The moment I got up, Yu Hyeop was already looking for me. Barely managing to pull on my eunuch robes, I stepped into the palace, and she immediately ran up and planted herself in front of me.

"Where did you go yesterday that you were nowhere to be seen all day?"

"My apologies. I had a bit too much to drink..."

"Sniff sniff... The smell is still awful. Did something bad happen?"

"Nothing special. And Your Majesty? Everything all right on your end?"

"I spent the day as usual. Though whether you can really call it 'usual' is another question..."

Escaping the assassination threat had been enough to drop Yu Hyeop's stress levels. But knowing what was coming next, this dull, listless peace must have felt strangely unnatural to her.

"Steel yourself. There's nothing we can do about it anyway."

"A king in name only. Not a single thing goes the way I want. How did the authority of the Han fall this far?"

"..."

Poor kid. She had finally gotten the chance to strike back at the people who wanted her dead, only to realize that the blow would land on her own imperial family. Joy was the last thing she felt; only sorrow remained.

Pat, pat...

All I could do was stroke the top of her head and pass a little warmth along. Yu Hyeop's eyes drifted shut.

Then, little by little, she opened her arms and started leaning toward me—

"Dong Zhuo has sent for you. He's looking for Do Yeop."

But our reverse-fate goddess decided to throw a wrench into things first thing in the morning. Leaving the disappointed Yu Hyeop behind, I set out to find Dong Zhuo.

The entire way there my heart wouldn't stop pounding. How the hell was I supposed to package this so my failure looked as small as possible?

Confess the failure straight out and ask him to send another envoy? Or gamble and beg for one more chance?

Wouldn't matter either way. The gap in Intelligence between us was so vast that persuasion simply wasn't on the table.

"I have brought Do Yeop."

By the time I came back to myself I was already standing in front of Dong Zhuo. No one was sucking him off today, apparently; he turned around in full official robes and spoke with complete composure.

"Why did you not report?"

"Pardon? Well... I was hoping to resolve a bit more on my own before I said anything..."

"You speak as if you know nothing of it."

"Of what, exactly?"

Thud!

Instead of answering, Dong Zhuo threw something. With a wet smack, a crushed human head hit the floor.

"Ugh..."

I couldn't help retching. Sure, I had already committed my first kill through Dong Zhuo's men, but back then I had been riding a wave of adrenaline. This was different.

"Th-this is...?"

"What do you think it is? Ding Yuan's head."

"What!? Ding Yuan's head!?"

For a second I couldn't process what he meant. I double-checked the severed head just to be sure—yes, it was the same Ding Yuan I had seen at the Capital Guard Commander's residence yesterday.

"Where on earth did you get this?"

"What are you babbling about? Lü Bu sent it. He'll be here shortly."

"..."

That made no sense. Yesterday Lü Bu had rejected my proposal cold.

More accurately, my Intelligence had been so low that the persuasion never landed properly.

Yet Ding Yuan was already a permanent resident of the afterlife, and the person who had sent this head was supposedly Lü Bu himself. How was I supposed to take that?

"Lü Bu has arrived."

Lü Bu appeared at once. The moment he entered the room he bowed deeply, completely ignoring me as he paid his respects to Dong Zhuo.

"Lü Bu, reporting."

"Well done. Ever since I entered the capital I haven't slept a single night with my legs stretched out. Tonight, at last, I will."

"The Bingzhou troops have been gathered at the camp. There was some resistance, but most of them are ready to welcome Lord Dong."

Lü Bu had completely abandoned yesterday's act of being the incarnation of loyalty and was now flaunting his devotion to Dong Zhuo. Well, once he decided to kill Ding Yuan, seizing control of the Bingzhou army would have been child's play for him.

Lately Ding Yuan had been pushing hard to win Zhang Liao's favor. The problem was that Zhang Liao's heart already belonged to Lü Bu.

With Zhang Liao's share of influence transferring straight over, no one else would have dared resist. And if they were going to play the little "lord-and-vassal game," a young, handsome Lü Bu was obviously preferable to a dried-up old man like Ding Yuan.

"You two already know each other, yes? Both of you have rendered great service."

Dong Zhuo praised me and introduced me to Lü Bu. Completely wrong, of course—because I had failed the mission.

"This has nothing to do with him."

And Lü Bu cut the connection clean. Dong Zhuo tilted his head.

"What do you mean? Did Do Yeop not persuade you to cut off Ding Yuan's head?"

"It is true that this man tried to win me over, but his methods were so base and ugly I had no intention of listening. Last night, however, a man named Li Su who serves Lord Dong came to see me."

"Li Su... he was from Bingzhou, wasn't he?"

"A fellow townsman of mine. He reasoned with me properly, so I finally changed my mind and decided to behead Ding Yuan."

"Is that so?"

Dong Zhuo frowned and turned toward me. Meanwhile I was burning every brain cell I had trying to decode what Lü Bu was saying.

So that was it. For some reason Lü Bu had suddenly switched sides and betrayed Ding Yuan.

But by handing the credit to Li Su instead of me, he had completely erased my share of the achievement.

"Lü Bu, I have something to discuss with this man. Wait outside for a moment, would you?"

Lü Bu clasped his fists and left the room. Cold sweat ran down my back as I forced myself to speak to Dong Zhuo.

"Everything has gone according to Lord Dong's will, then?"

"But not thanks to you. What happened? Why couldn't you persuade Lü Bu?"

"Well..."

"I should never have entrusted the job to a eunuch like you. I thought you had some special talent, but it was nothing more than cheap tricks after all."

"..."

Dong Zhuo shook his head in clear disappointment. The fact that things had worked out meant I hadn't drawn his full wrath, but it was equally true that every scrap of goodwill I had built up had vanished in an instant.

"Leave. Go back to your real duties and attend the King of Chenliu."

Dong Zhuo had completely lost interest in me. And now that I understood how overwhelmingly stats controlled behavior, I no longer even had the strength to try deceiving him.

Shoulders slumped, I walked out of the room. This was a massive problem.

My ultimate goal was still to assassinate Dong Zhuo. That was why I had tried to catch his eye and become a true confidant—and Lü Bu had just shoved me clean out of the picture.

"A mere eunuch dares try his little schemes in front of me?"

"...?"

The moment I stepped into the corridor I ran straight into Lü Bu. He hadn't gone back to the room; he had been waiting for me.

"W-why did you suddenly change your mind?"

"Why should I explain myself to a eunuch like you?"

"Because if you tell me, I might reveal Chosun's whereabouts?"

"..."

I might be short on Intelligence, but I wasn't actually incompetent. Deceiving him was hard; figuring out what he wanted was not.

"What is your relationship with Chosun?"

"What grand 'relationship' could a eunuch like me possibly have with Lady Chosun? I just live in the palace, so I hear all sorts of rumors."

"Have you developed feelings for her? You really don't know your place, do you?"

"..."

Yeah, even if I were Chosun I wouldn't look twice at me when a perfect specimen like him was standing right there. Lü Bu sneered and stepped aside to clear the corridor.

"I won't let the likes of you set conditions on me. I'll find Chosun myself, so get lost."

"..."

In the end Lü Bu told me nothing. But was that really true?

Because just now he had as good as told me the reason he hadn't asked for Chosun's location.

I returned to the palace. The moment I told Yu Hyeop that Ding Yuan was dead, she let out a long sigh.

"Dong Zhuo will seize complete control of the court. Do Yeop, what on earth are you thinking?"

"Well... I had a plan, but a small problem came up? Still, by next month I'll have thought of something better, so don't worry."

Because by then I planned to crank Intelligence up to 96. Sure, having zero means of self-defense would be dangerous, but how many life-threatening situations could really crop up inside the palace?

"May I borrow him for a moment?"

Chosun was there too, of course. Absolute professional at hiding in the dark and eavesdropping on other ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠people's conversations.

The second Yu Hyeop gave permission, Chosun dragged me straight out into the corridor.

Then she spun around, eyes blazing with fury. With the whites of her eyes showing on all four sides—full-blown sanpaku—I knew she was pissed off on a historic scale.

"What happened? Why did Lü Bu kill Ding Yuan?"

"Haa... Hearing that question from your own mouth makes it hard to know how to answer. You brought this on yourself, didn't you?"

"Brought it on myself? Lü Bu refused your persuasion. I said I would follow his decision..."

"He had already decided to kill Ding Yuan by that point. You might not know this, but Lü Bu had been getting pretty thoroughly sidelined by Ding Yuan lately. If they had defeated Dong Zhuo and taken power, a dangerous man like Lü Bu would almost certainly have been packed off to Bingzhou to hunt barbarians and left there. And right then he found out Lady Chosun was in Luoyang."

"..."

Even Chosun must have understood by now. The only reason Lü Bu had cut off Ding Yuan's head and sent it to Dong Zhuo despite my failed persuasion was one thing.

For the Chosun standing right in front of me. Because the only way he could stay in Luoyang was to enter Dong Zhuo's service.

"Th-this can't be. I only wanted to save your life... why...?"

"That's how the gears of cause and effect work. No matter how hard you flap your wings against the howling storm of history, you don't even raise a breeze. So accept reality already."

"How am I supposed to accept this!? You yourself said Dong Zhuo would depose the Emperor. If that happens... if that really happens..."

Chosun completely panicked and started tearing at her own hair. Fair enough—after lecturing me so passionately about loyalty to the Han, she had accidentally become an accomplice. Disappointment was inevitable.

"My goal hasn't changed. I can't stop the Emperor from being driven out, but I will protect Your Majesty at least. Whether I assassinate Dong Zhuo or find another way, I will drive that man out of the palace."

"But how? Does Dong Zhuo still trust you?"

"No. A eunuch like me probably won't even get to share a table with him anymore. But I'll figure something out somehow, so for now, Lady Chosun, leave Luoyang for a while."

"That doesn't make any sense. What can you do alone that you want to send me away?"

"Well... nothing good comes from running into Lü Bu, does it? You might get swept up in old feelings and ruin everything..."

Wham! Chosun grabbed me by the collar. No more knives—now she was just putting her hands on me outright.

"Mention Lü Bu one more time in front of me and I won't let it go."

"What are you so embarrassed about? Two grown adults meet, feelings can develop, what's the big deal..."

"It is not what you think. You don't even understand and yet you run your mouth so freely?"

"Then tell me what it is and I won't bother you about it again—"

Shashashak!

That was as far as I got. Chosun was thoroughly furious; she released me and vanished down the corridor in a flash.

Did it never occur to her that the more she acted like that, the more stubbornly I would keep asking?

A few days passed. With Dong Zhuo no longer summoning me, I was nothing more than an ordinary eunuch of the King of Chenliu's household. Killing time with Yu Hyeop was about all I could manage.

Then one day, the fated hour finally arrived.

Dong Zhuo convened a court assembly without the Emperor's permission. He didn't even call the Emperor; he only brought Yu Hyeop out and declared he would elevate her as the new Son of Heaven.

Naturally Lu Zhi, Yuan Shao, and the other high ministers rose up in fury. But real power already belonged to Dong Zhuo, not them.

In the end, despite the protests of a few hardliners, the motion to depose the Emperor passed. The road into the age of chaos was open.

I brought Yu Hyeop back to the palace. She said not a single word the entire way.

"Everyone leave except Do Yeop."

Then she dismissed everyone else and left only me. The moment the last presence faded, she threw herself into my arms without warning and trembled all over.

"It happened just as you said. Dong Zhuo really intends to depose the Emperor. What am I supposed to do?"

"I am deeply sorry, but there is still nothing we can do. For now, please accept it."

"Accept it? You want me to drive my own brother out with my own hands? Even if I become Emperor that way, who will ever recognize me?"

"..."

She was right. Dong Zhuo himself had opened the door to the chaotic age, but even allowing for that, the reason imperial authority had crashed into the dirt was that Yu Hyeop had become Emperor through such an abnormal process.

Yuan Shao would refuse to acknowledge her at all and later set up Liu Yu. Yuan Shu would go one better and declare himself emperor.

Exercising autonomous power in their own regions in place of a hollowed-out Han—that was the essence of the warlord era.

If Cao Cao had never taken Emperor Xian under his wing as the "Emperor's protector," we might have ended up with a Thirty Kingdoms instead of Three.

"I will find a way somehow. So please, Your Majesty, steel your heart. You must never let Dong Zhuo look down on you."

All I could do was tell her to trust me. With the chance of assassinating Dong Zhuo now at rock bottom, I needed to start hunting for the next method as soon as possible.

I spent the entire day with Yu Hyeop, doing mental care. When she finally went to bed early, exhausted, I left her and returned to my quarters.

"Do Yeop? Someone asked me to give you this."

The moment I arrived, another eunuch handed me a letter.

"What is it?"

"Who was it again? You know, that insanely pretty palace maid? She said to pass it on."

"...?"

Chosun. She usually just showed up in person—why a letter today?

That was all it said. Of all the taverns in the city, why that one?

It wasn't even a place that held any special memories with Chosun.

Night deepened. I slipped out of the palace in secret and headed for the marketplace for the first time in a long while.

Luoyang's night, lit by lanterns, was still bright. No one could have guessed what was about to happen in the palace, or that this place would one day be burned to ash.

A street enjoying its final festival—the last flare of a dying light. Maybe that was why every step toward Chwiwharu felt more bitter.

In the end I hadn't changed a single thing, had I?

"Welcome— Wait, what? You bastard, what the hell are you doing here!?"

The moment I stepped into Chwiwharu, Freckles gave me the warmest welcome I had received in ages. Fair enough—I had run off with Bibi without a word and left him to do all the heavy lifting alone.

"Sorry about back then. But today I'm a real customer, so just show me to a table."

"A customer? Did you suddenly come into money? Don't tell me you turned to banditry."

"There might be a guest waiting for ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠me. Hard to explain, but a beauty so stunning you'd swear she's the number one in Luoyang the second you see her..."

"Ah! One already came. Check the table all the way in the back."

So Chosun really was here. Something felt off, though.

Even at night, she wasn't the type to walk around with her face uncovered in a high-traffic place like Chwiwharu.

Still, we had an appointment, so I followed Freckles' directions to the innermost table. Just like the private space Yuan Shao had wanted last time, it was screened off by folding screens that blocked the view from every side.

"Why meet in a place like this today..."

But I couldn't finish the sentence. There really was ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠a jaw-dropping beauty sitting there—only it wasn't Chosun.

"Ah... I only just arrived myself."

It was Yu Bi. The way she cupped her flushed cheeks with both hands looked exactly the same as the day we first met here.