Chapter 13
Chapter 13
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Translator: penny
Chapter: 13
Chapter Title: The Empire's Holy Sword
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Frederick: Sorry about that.
Judak☆: ?
Frederick: Take this.
(Screenshot of a hugely rusted greatsword)
It's the empire-certified holy sword.
If needed, I can even write a certificate for it.
"What the hell is wrong with this guy suddenly?"
The man had really changed.
He was acting like a completely different person, to the point where it was suspicious.
It was like some thug had a gun to his head, forcing him to apologize.
Judak☆: ?
Frederick: For trying to forcibly grab and shake you down, I sincerely apologize.
['Frederick' has requested a trade for ???]
He'd taken the apology bribe out of the blue.
The massive greatsword delivered right in front of him was proof.
[Appraisal of '???' has failed.]
The problem was that censored name.
"Is this thing really a holy sword?"
He narrowed his eyes and examined the greatsword.
It was incredibly rusted and ancient-looking.
It looked like just touching it would inflict tetanus.
How could something like this be a holy sword?
It wasn't quite right to just stick it in a corner of the warehouse either, so after pondering what to do with it, he gave it a try and grabbed it.
Vmmm.
"What? It's super light?"
No, it was beyond light—it felt like it wasn't even there.
It was as long as an adult man and thick and brutal-looking, yet it was this light?
It didn't feel hollow inside either.
"Uh."
Crack!
He'd swung it by mistake, and an innocent wooden crate shattered into pieces, scattering everywhere.
That's when the anomaly happened.
['???' has transformed into 'Ancient Holy Sword'!]
[Ancient Holy Sword]
The holy sword once used by Adrian's hero.
Now so ancient that its history is dismissed as a fairy tale.
Only those granted the qualification can wield it.
Equipped with Light On/Off function!
It felt like some really tacky ad copy.
The moment he thought that inwardly, an enormous light burst forth from the greatsword!
"Argh! Wh-what? It's not blinding?"
It instantly lit up the dimly lit warehouse interior, which had only barely been illuminated by lamps.
And it even came with automatic eye protection.
"Nice. From today, you're Lighting Unit No. 1."
He wouldn't need any other lights.
Plus, this could double as an infinite power lamp that didn't even consume mana crystals.
He considered leaning it against the nearby wall, then remembered the most important thing.
Click!
"Can't resist posting proof."
Title: It's me. Do any gallers know what this is?
Author: Judak☆
(Screenshot of the holy sword bursting with light)
What is this? Anyone know how to use it?
It's emitting light, so I'm planning to use it as a lamp for now lol
> Kraaack!!!
> What the hell is this in the middle of the night...
> All the nearby beasts are gonna swarm here, fuck!!!
> Judak☆: Didn't realize it was night, my bad lol
> ??
> Teacher, please spare a thought for your life...
- But isn't that the Adrian holy sword?
> Yeah? Kinda looks like it.
> No way, why do you have that?
> Judak☆: Fanboy gave it to me as an apology.
> ???
> Ah fuck, the crown prince is trash, empire's done for.
> Season 34234: Empire's fucked.
Title: Wait, Judak, you're the hero?
Why the hell is that thing glowing?
> That greatsword never activated even once during the Great War because it had no owner, why now?
> Judak, what qualification do you even have?
> Is Judak a female hero?
> Huh?
> Oh?
> FullElf★: For real?
> Hm... suspicious.
"What? Nobody's reacting much?"
He'd posted the proof to brag and gauge reactions at the same time.
If it really was a holy sword, it'd be an imperial treasure, and having it could bring more trouble than good.
He wasn't a hero to begin with—he was Judak.
But everyone seemed disinterested.
Of course, some did make an issue of it.
- But that's a holy sword, is it okay to just give it away like that?
> Clueless.
> No;; it's an imperial holy relic first and foremost;
> Do I have to care about that crap?
> So, ban incoming?
> Hungry, recommend dinner menus.
> Adrian's future looks bright lol.
The holy sword had never manifested even once throughout the Great War.
Maybe that's why—the Adrian gallers cared more about immediate survival than some useless hunk of metal.
As the fuss died down, the smartass posts trickling in proved it.
Smartass Post) Judak, release the booze or we're doomed!!
Not too late yet!!!
So hurry up and offer the alcohol!!!
> Judak☆: No, listen, the holy sword is
> Author) Ah lol whatever, just drop the booze lol
> Booze sword? What? Did you say booze sword?
> Can you drink it?
> Wow; look at these dwarves going insane over prohibition;
Smartass Post) Judak, asking if now's the time!!!!
Author: Talldru
Should we hit Adrian now?
Should we hit Frederick now?
Then will you give us booze?
> Life to the dwarves!
> Free our throats!
> (Frogcon sobbing while pointing a spear at itself)
> I crave booze, long have I pondered, I crave booze, even in dreams booze arises, in Judak's thoughts, in my thoughts, I crave booze long...
Nobody cared about the holy sword.
He stood there blankly for a moment, then let out a hollow laugh.
Title: It's me.
Author: Judak☆
(Photo of the brightly shining holy sword)
I can really keep this? I can just swallow it whole?
No takebacks later?
> Fuck main guy!!! Drop the booze!!!!!!!
"Whatever."
[Draft Beer 500cc] - 5 Mana Crystals
[Black Beer Can 500ml] - 5 Mana Crystals
[Soju Good Day 1 Bottle] - 3 Mana Crystals
He released booze into the alcohol zombie-infested gallery.
*
The seized booze had returned to the gallery.
Just that turned the gallery into pandemonium.
- Kyahaha! Finally!
- Kya~ this hits the spot~~~~
- Was right on the verge of a big decision, Judak, you saved me.
- You're back, my precious.
Title: Thanks to Lord Judak, I survived another day.
(Screenshot of dew resting between shoulder and neck)
Elves gotta live on dew.
Leaving a tiny token of gratitude ovo
> Wowzers.
> (Elf holding back tears and thumbs-up con)
> Dew was THAT dew lol
> For real... wow... wow.
> So, wholesome pure too?
> Bump our favorability too?
> Dryer post dropped!!!
> What!!!
Title: Thanks, big bro Judak!
Author: WholesomePure
(Screenshot with just eyes peeking out)
(Rough screenshot of high-proof distilled liquor thumbs-up)
Judak is our hope!
Love you *^^*
> Hm...
> Tch, pass.
> Lost your roots. Disappointing, Dryer lady.
> Author) No idea what you all mean^^
> Judak☆: You said you love me! You said you love me!!
> Author) ...^^
Title: I'll post in WholesomePure's place >v[Author: SoloAndGetsWastedWell (Something unwholesome male) Embarrassed but... hope this satisfies]o<
> Ah!!! Fuck!!! You!!! Little shit!!!!
> ...You bastard!
> Satisfy my ass, you fuck!!!
> Hot damn!
> Author galler, go to the woods and chomp a big bite of killswitch grass.
- O.
> ?
"Ah, shit."
He'd seen it.
This was a tactical nuke—maybe worse.
He immediately hit the member info and slapped them with a 999-day ban.
But even that didn't calm his mind.
He hurriedly grabbed the holy sword he'd propped up haphazardly, turned on the light function, and rubbed it on his eyes.
[Sacred Light]
Purifies polluted and rotten minds.
"Whew..."
Only then did his greatly shaken heart settle.
The holy sword had an "erase what you saw" function beyond just lighting.
"Anyway, wonder if what I gave him went over well."
What Frederick had given wasn't something you could just gulp down without issue.
It might be fine now, but it could cause problems later.
Swallowing something like that would lead to trouble.
In that sense, as he pondered what would be good, he recalled the usual complaints on the gallery.
- Ugh, food tastes like shit...
- Gotta eat to survive;
- After marketplace food, plain water and raw meat is tough.
"Food culture here was underdeveloped."
More precisely, it had been underdeveloped by force.
The Great War had turned all culture to ash, fixing isekai perceptions of food culture to one thing.
- Gallers, wanna die whining about food?
- Full belly and nutrition? That's it.
Purely tied to survival.
Taste wasn't a factor.
On that note, he gifted Frederick—who'd initiated the trade—the thing to soothe public sentiment: magic powder.
- But the imperial family was sprinkling this, what is it?
- Smooth little paper packets, hmm.
- Seasoning? Mix it in food?
Yes, magic powder.
MSG.
*
A certain four-man party crossing the mountains.
The knight walking at the front said,
"Let's camp here for today."
"Whew! Finally!"
"Tiring, but feels rewarding."
"I'll get dinner ready first!"
It was the party led by Rox, the Kelton Kingdom knight who'd staked his life on Judak's energy drinks.
Unusually, the lineup was elf, dwarf, orc, and knight, but their goal was straightforward.
"How many did we get today?"
"Hmm, about eighty, I think."
Simply hunting beasts.
Rox, wracked with guilt for failing to protect the Kelton King, had wandered around, and the party formed naturally.
But it was an odd combo at first glance.
Each harbored hatred for beasts, so that bonded them.
But that alone wouldn't form a multi-race party.
There was a decisive reason binding the party.
"So, has the market opened?"
Judak's market.
Market food enjoyed after a grueling journey.
Heavenly respite.
But the dwarf Gilly, who'd opened the gallery, didn't look pleased.
He looked utterly despairing and agonized.
"...Gone."
"Pardon?"
"Sold out! Judak opened the market an hour early!"
"No way?!"
At Gilly's wail, every party member's face soured as they set up camp.
Everyone except the energy drink fanatic, Rox.
The elf Nadia, whose ears drooped limply, squeezed her eyes shut and shrieked.
"The market check order was you, Gilly! Why didn't you check sooner?!"
"You think I saw this coming? Damn, if I'd known, I'd have rationed the beer..."
And without a center, division was swift.
"You stupid dwarf! Because of you, soju's gone for today!"
"Wh-what?"
"Hand over my true dew!"
"Listen here, you pointy-ears?"
The mood turned hostile in seconds.
But luckily, the human thief and porter Sophia had farmed an item ahead.
"You lowly other-racers...! C-calm down! I got one at least...!"
"Urgh... well, if so..."
"But hold on, Sophia. What did you just say..."
"Look here!"
What Sophia pulled from her bosom was the seasoning MSG that Judak had distributed via Frederick.
To quell the furious public sentiment, he'd shared it lavishly, so one made it to the party too.
And gathered around the campfire, they each marveled for their own reasons.
It was the current gallery hot topic itself: the magic powder MSG.
"Ooh... how do they make such refined packaging?"
"Just add to food and it magically tastes good?"
"Judak truly is a god..."
"Everyone, quiet down...! Please shut up so I can demo...!"
Tap tap.
Sophia sprinkled the so-called MSG into what looked utterly revolting beast stew.
Once, twice, then dumped the whole packet.
"Hmm... this'll really work?"
Nadia's expression turned odd.
Even if Judak brought all sorts of magical stuff, this seemed too unrealistic?
"Done! Now, Lady Nadia! Try it first!"
"Eek, me first?"
"You're the eldest!"
"..."
Nadia felt weird.
Sophia was a cute blonde who hadn't fully matured yet.
'For some reason, it keeps grating on me...'
While she thought that, three pairs of eyes fixed on her.
Ears drooping in intimidation, Nadia finally mustered courage and took a sip of the beast stew.
"Hieeek?!"
"Nadia, you okay?!"
"It's... too delicious!!"
Nadia's pointed ears perked straight up.
The moment isekai's first tasty beast meat was born.