Crossing the Wall (2)
It was a truly terrifying power.
I'd never truly sparred with Lonari, so I couldn't tell whether this was her full strength. Even so, one thing was certain — her resolve was absolute. I was putting up a real fight, and still I couldn't so much as twitch a toe.
Just what the hell is she doing…!
"You're always like this! You've got so many secrets. But the second someone tries to get close, you take a step back. Every single time! Well, that doesn't work on me!"
"Wait… Lonari."
"Wait? Wait for what! If you're about to say it's for my own good, spare me the excuses! Why do you get to decide that on your own? I said I want to hear it! And if you still don't get it, I'll spell it out for you right now. So listen carefully!"
Lonari pressed on.
"No matter what you're hiding, no matter how heavy that truth is…! I won't get hurt. I won't feel burdened. And I won't look away!"
"…"
Don't say another word.
That was the thought that rose inside me in that instant. If I could have, I would have covered my ears. Or screamed. I didn't want to hear what came next.
But Lonari said it anyway.
"So…! You can tell me!"
"……"
I clenched my teeth.
…This one and that one both. Neither of them gave a damn about my resolve. Did they think I lived like this because I wanted to?
I was human too. I had desires of my own, and those desires made me impulsive sometimes. But I held them back. Because I knew they didn't fit my station — that no matter what I forced into my hands, it would eventually slip away.
And they didn't even know that. They knew nothing at all, and still they kept shaking me. I resented them for it.
"…"
I reached a hand toward Lonari.
"…!"
I could feel her fluster. Her power pressed down on me harder still, but I didn't stop reaching.
And then —
— Crrrack…
The floor gave way beneath our feet.
"Ah…!"
I'd already suspected the floorboards wouldn't hold under Lonari's pressure. …But the fall was longer than expected. This was the first floor — so there was space underneath?
Lonari and I began plummeting into the dark.
It was a fall she had never seen coming, and Lonari Sharino was completely thrown. Before she could do a thing about it, she was plunging into darkness. All she could see was the corridor ceiling receding above her. She had no idea what to grab, or what to do.
Lonari squeezed her eyes shut. The fall felt like an eternity.
Then something wrapped around her. An impact followed immediately after.
"Hhk……!"
The jolt crushed the air from her lungs; she couldn't even breathe. But she hadn't hit the ground. It didn't feel like water, either.
As the aftershock slowly faded, Lonari cautiously opened her eyes.
Ilsea was there. In the yellowish light, his face looked down at her.
"You okay?"
For a moment Lonari turned the words over in her mind. Okay… okay…?
"Don't tell me you hurt your neck."
"Eek…!"
The rough brush of his hand against her nape startled a cry out of her.
"…Looks like you're fine."
Only when Ilsea said that did Lonari begin to piece the situation together.
"…?"
She still had no idea where they were. But somehow, she and Ilsea had fallen from the corridor into this place — and she had come through unharmed, held in his arms.
…Held?
Ilsea asked her then,
"Can you stand?"
Lonari didn't give the question much thought. Her mouth answered on its own before she had the chance.
"It might be… a little hard…"
"That so."
Still holding her, Ilsea looked up. Lonari followed his gaze and found a small hole of light above them. That must have been where they'd fallen through. The corridor floor collapsing was one thing — but a hole this deep underneath it? What on earth.
Ilsea surveyed their surroundings, then clicked his tongue.
— Tsk.
"…Of all places, it had to lead here."
Lonari looked around as well. A dark stone passage stretched on ahead, lanterns lighting the way at intervals. Shallow water pooled along the floor.
Ilsea asked,
"Can you get us back up there?"
Lonari looked up again.
"The height…"
"We fell for about two seconds, so roughly twenty meters. The shaft's only a little wider than a manhole."
"Hmm, that might be tough… I need a bit of space if I'm going to fly."
"Hm."
Ilsea stared into the darkness beyond the passage. Lonari couldn't see anything there, but he seemed to be looking at something.
"…We can't just sit here waiting for help, either."
He said,
"Put your arms around my neck."
Lonari did.
"Tighter."
She did that too. Then Ilsea deftly shifted her onto his back.
"…"
And he started walking along the passage.
— Splash, splash.
He moved like someone who knew the way — like someone who had walked this path more than once.
Lonari asked,
"Where is this…?"
"The Academy Sewers. Exact location, no idea."
"Have you been here before?"
"…"
Ilsea didn't answer.
There's definitely something going on here…
She wanted to dig into it, but given that this whole mess was clearly her fault, pressing him further felt a little too shameless.
"Sorry… I didn't think it'd turn out like this…"
As expected, no answer from Ilsea.
"…"
Lonari simply buried her face against the nape of his neck. Through the briny sewer smell, she caught the scent of his hair — the same scent that had been on his handkerchief. Being like this, even in a situation like this, felt somehow comforting, and that brought a twinge of guilt.
But saying I'm fine now, you can put me down at this point felt awkward… and part of her wanted to stay on his back a little longer.
At least she could thank him. He was the one who'd caught her on the way down, after all.
"Hey…"
But the moment Lonari started to speak, Ilsea got there first.
"Velica,"
"…?"
"Velica's probably gone to Adel."
He seemed intent on telling her about Velica. Lonari pricked up her ears. She was already in a position and place where she could hear him perfectly well, but still.
"You were there when Adel challenged Velica to a duel."
"Yeah."
"Then you heard the conditions Adel set, too."
"Ah…"
Lonari cast her mind back. She'd heard Adel's demands again at the Great Training Ground, so she remembered them clearly.
"…She said something about going to the ball together, and joining her club, I think."
"Right. Velica would have agreed to those conditions in exchange for persuading Adel to go easy on me."
"So when Vel said she'd solved the problem…"
That's how it happened.
The question held in Lonari's silence was answered by Ilsea's silence in turn.
"Is that club… full of really awful people? Do they do bad things, or…"
"No. Adel's not that kind of person."
Of course she isn't.
"Then why make those demands…"
"Adel said it herself, didn't she. To pull Velica away from me."
"…"
It was true that Ilsea had been known as the Academy's delinquent since last year. The rumors had started after summer break, once word spread that the Alezard family had fallen.
Why the Alezard family had fallen. And why Ilsea had become a delinquent. Lonari didn't know the details. …Or perhaps she simply hadn't tried to find out.
The circumstances surrounding the Alezard family's collapse were a subject even the adults kept quiet about, and the students didn't seem to know much either. And Ilsea himself, who carried that truth, refused to let anyone near it.
In those days, Ilsea had been like a bare blade — just getting close was enough to cut you. Whether the approach was a gentle hand or mere curiosity, his answer never changed. Many people who tried to reach him shattered against him, and Ilsea himself was wounded in the process. His reputation drifted further and further from the truth, plummeting in nothing but a negative direction.
Lonari had been disappointed in him then. But looking at the Ilsea of now, a different thought sometimes crossed her mind.
That behind the thorns he'd bristled with was a cruel truth even he couldn't bear — one that, even if known, would help no one and only drive people further away. That maybe that was why he had kept pushing everyone out ever since.
…It might just be speculation.
But Adel, Ilsea, and Velica's relationship was almost certainly bound up with that truth.
Ilsea picked up where he'd left off.
"Anyway, that's the situation Velica's in. It's my fault. So if you want someone to blame, blame me."
What a ridiculous thing to say. As if she could just blame him because he told her to.
"Vel would never think it was your fault."
"…"
— Splash, splash.
The sound of his footsteps.
"Ilsea."
Lonari said,
"I'm sorry."
"…I already heard that."
Lonari shook her head.
"No, not that. Earlier — I was being stubborn. Saying you could tell me anything… spouting things like that."
"…"
"I'm sorry. You might not have been ready to talk. And I just said it on my own."
Then Ilsea said,
"……Do you think saying sorry for everything makes it all go away?"
There was an emotion in his voice that was unlike him, and Lonari was a little startled.
"You said you wouldn't look away."
Steadying herself, Lonari answered quickly.
"Yeah."
"I have no intention of telling you everything right now. But you said those things because you were prepared to keep your word, right?"
"…Yeah."
As she answered, Lonari swallowed hard.
"So if the day ever comes when I bring this up with you again… then……"
Ilsea trailed off there and closed his mouth. From the set of his back, from the heartbeat she could feel against her chest, Lonari found a deep resignation. He was drifting away into the dark again.
"…No. Just forget it. I was talking nonsense."
As he started to shake his head, Lonari rested her head against his and held him tighter.
"…?"
She thought she had to hold on to him.
"I promise. Whatever your truth is, I will never turn away."
"…"
"I'll stake everything I am on it. I promise."
……
Far ahead, a small light came into view. Until that light became the landscape of a setting sun outside, Ilsea didn't say a single word.
When they emerged from the sewers, they found themselves behind a strangely unfamiliar building. It looked like an Academy building, but one that didn't see much use. Ilsea set Lonari down on the grass there.
"Thank you…"
"Sure."
Drawing in the clean air made her feel a little more alive. But even then, Ilsea's expression wasn't particularly bright. Was it because of the conversation they'd had in the sewers?
Worry came first for Lonari — but she soon realized she'd been fretting over entirely the wrong thing. Because when she went of her own accord to the faculty office, she found Ilsea being strangled under Professor Luda's arm.
"This brat — I just finished praising him, and he's already causing trouble again…!"
— Ghk…
Ilsea's dying voice.
"Professor! I-I'm the one who did it, okay!?"
Even as Lonari said that and tried to peel Luda off him, the professor didn't budge an inch.
"Ilsea Alezard! Just what kind of threats did you make against Lonari to make her say something this absurd!"