12. Daughter or Monster? (2)
12. Daughter or Monster? (2)
12. Daughter or Monster (2)
'...I didn't think she'd allow it this easily.'
After finishing the call with Kaho, a sigh escaped on its own from some inexplicable sense of emptiness.
The Kaho I knew wouldn't have permitted my request to stay at the Main House for a while so easily...
Contrary to my expectations, Kaho had granted my request all too readily. Without even asking what circumstances had come up for me.
'...She's changed a bit since that day—no, a lot.'
If I had to pinpoint the turning point when Kaho started changing, that night inevitably came to mind, even though I didn't want to think about it.
The day Kaho, who had despised and hated me so much, suddenly hugged me, saying she loved me. And of all times, right when she caught me masturbating...
"Huuu..."
Recalling that night made my whole body cringe with shame. That's why I'd begged her to just pretend it never happened...
'Why couldn't Kaho forget about that night...'
Common sense dictated that what happened that night never should have. Regardless of our relationship as mother and daughter, stuff like that just shouldn't go down between a mom and her kid.
Sure, we weren't a normal mother-daughter duo, but that night was different.
Kaho, who had never once called herself 'Mom' in front of me up to that point, that night kept calling herself 'Mom' and me 'daughter'.
Just like any ordinary mother and daughter out there...
Which made it even harder to wrap my head around.
What the hell was Kaho thinking, calling me 'daughter' and saying she'd teach me about masturbation? And why... did she hold me... and... touch my body... like that...
"What the hell were you thinking..."
I fanned my flushed face to cool it down, but it wasn't enough to dispel the heat blooming all over my body from my spine.
At this rate, maybe I'm the one who can't forget that night. I wanted to erase it somehow, but memories carved into your body were a total pain in the ass.
Just from Kaho stroking my stomach while giving me advice that day, my underwear got a little wet. It was the first time I'd ever felt something like that, so maybe that's why.
Now, just thinking about that night made me reflexively get wet—a bit of a disaster.
'She really... taught me properly, just like she said...'
Thanks to that, I'd been masturbating every single day like she taught me lately, leaving me a tad sleep-deprived. Up until now, I'd only done it super rarely to spare Miyagi's body...
Call it resignation, I guess.
Since Kaho had already taken my virginity, there was no point in babying the body anymore... Or after holding back for so long, reining in the urges had gotten way harder...
With the daily grind of tough abstinence, wasn't a little sexual relief okay? So I'd been going easy on the masturbation front...
That's why, staying at the Main House for a month didn't exactly thrill me.
Because there was no way I could masturbate in a house with Kaho around...
I didn't think something like that night would happen again, but still, masturbating with Kaho in the house? No chance.
Still, I could probably hold out for a month, right?
Not wanting to go home just because I couldn't masturbate—what a pathetic, self-loathing thought. Another sigh slipped out automatically.
**
For all my griping, there were plenty of upsides to staying at the Main House.
As Kaho's place, the facilities were top-notch, and the security was ironclad. Non-residents couldn't even get into the Mansion.
For me, currently hounded by Paparazzi, that was the biggest perk. Staying here meant zero risk of needless rumors.
Plus, it was close to the current drama filming site, Manager unnie's place was nearby too, and the housekeeper came for meals and cleaning... Anyway, perks galore.
The downside? Our awkward relationship with Kaho.
She'd gotten softer with me since that day...
But the uncomfortable vibes between us weren't vanishing overnight, so once I stepped inside, we'd probably both be fumbling around awkwardly.
'...Though, it is a chance to get closer.'
Truth be told, I did have this hopeful little thought: Maybe living together could bring Kaho and me closer?
And yeah, she'd been treating me nicer lately.
Seizing this chance right could dial back her disgust toward me a tiny bit, even if we didn't hit full mother-daughter status.
So, if I played this smart...
Could our relationship improve just a smidge...?
Could Kaho call me 'daughter' again, like that night?
Could I finally call Kaho 'Mom' without it feeling weird?
Harboring those vague hopes, I left my leaky-ceiling apartment behind and headed to Kaho's Main House.
My heart started pounding like I was off on a trip. Anxious, but deep down, excited too.
"Is this all your stuff? Isn't it kinda light?"
"House isn't far anyway, so I'll just pop back for anything I need. Thanks for helping with the bags."
With Manager unnie's help moving my stuff, I hopped straight into the elevator and headed up to the top-floor Main House.
It should've been a familiar sight, but today it all felt fresh. Guess I wasn't just a little excited about this—I was really looking forward to it.
Even after what went down with Kaho, I...
Couldn't deny I was thrilled to be living with her again.
Ding-dong—
The elevator chimed arrival at the top floor, and the doors slid open.
Last time I came here with Shizuka, I was insanely anxious, but now? I felt a tiny thrill.
Unlike before, no hesitant finger on the doorbell. This time, I pressed it without a second thought.
Even waiting for Kaho to open up didn't feel awkward anymore. It was like returning to my home.
After a short wait, I heard Kaho's footsteps approaching from inside.
Last time, when she realized it was me, she'd hesitated on the doorknob, but now it turned with a crisp, unhesitating click.
Clack—
The door swung open, and Kaho greeted me with an awkward smile. She looked unsure how to welcome me too—lips twitching before she spoke.
"...Welcome home, Miyagi."
Come to think of it, it was the first time. Walking into this house and getting a 'welcome home' from Mom. The moment I heard it, for the first time...
"...I'm home."
For real, for the very first time, it hit me: this was my Main House.
Was 'I'm home' always this awkward? Just a simple greeting, and shyness wrapped around my whole body.
Hiding my embarrassment, I followed Kaho inside, and the house's vibe felt... different.
It used to have this eerie chill, like no one lived there...
Now, it was filled with warm coziness. Just from the lights and TV being on—it was wild how the cold air had turned toasty.
Staring blankly around the place, Kaho cleared her throat and looked at me.
"How long you gonna stand there zoning out in the living room? Get to your room already."
"Huh? Oh, got it."
She was urging me to my room like always, so I didn't think much of it. She's still uncomfortable having me around the house, huh...
But the moment she kinda shoved me into my room...
"W-what is this...?"
I couldn't help but freak at how totally different the room looked from usual.
Just a few days ago, it was crammed with tiny furniture that didn't fit my body at all, but now? Completely transformed.
New bed, new desk, new wardrobe—everything sized for an adult like me, not some little girl.
"Did you... change all the furniture just 'cause I'm coming?"
"Just replaced the worn-out stuff. At least now it's..."
Kaho's lips twitched as she stared blankly around the room.
I knew why she'd never changed the furniture here before.
This room had been left untouched, waiting for her beloved daughter—the real Miyagi—to come back someday.
Knowing that, I'd always handled the furniture with care too. So it wouldn't get damaged, making sure the real Miyagi wouldn't be shortchanged when she returned.
So, this place wasn't my room originally.
It was for the Miyagi that Kaho loved.
But changing the furniture now meant...
"...You've outgrown them."
It meant Kaho was finally acknowledging me—this version of me.
I had no clue why she'd suddenly accepted me.
But it felt like I had finally been etched into Kaho's heart...
"You, crying...?"
"Huh? Oh... n-no, it's nothing..."
Just this much was enough to soothe the wounds from all her hatred.
I couldn't even get mad like, Why now, after treating me like I didn't exist?
"Um, does the furniture not suit you...?"
"No, no, it's not that—I like it, that's all."
I felt so stupid for not being able to hate you.
My chest swelled with the hope that I could finally be accepted as your daughter.
"...I really like it."
I pitied myself so much for being this pathetic...
Tears welled up alongside that wretched self-mockery.