The Widening Distance
“Jung-woo, wake up. Semester’s started, you know.”
“Mmm… semester…?”
“Your first class is at ten, remember? Get up and get ready. No more sleeping.”
What kind of nonsense was that? I thought as I rolled over in bed and turned on my phone.
September 1st. Friday.
Ah, shit. My vacation.
It’s over.
Semester start.
A word that weakens every college student just by existing.
When I was younger, I used to think middle schoolers, high schoolers, college students, and working adults were all completely different. Now that I’m a college student myself, I realize there’s not much difference at all.
Middle and high schoolers start looking forward to vacation the moment school begins. Office workers start counting down to Friday the second Monday arrives.
And college students start dreaming of the semester’s end the moment it begins.
I wanted to deny it, to tell myself this was all just a dream, but the class schedule notification glowing on my phone screen forced me to accept reality.
“Mom, want to head out together?”
“Sure. I’ve got an early meeting too.”
“Lucky. I was dreading going out in this heat.”
“I knew exactly how my son was feeling and prepared accordingly.”
Attending the same university where my mom teaches has its perks—getting around is way more comfortable than for anyone else. When our schedules line up, I ride with her. If she has time after my classes, she even drops me off at home. Thanks to that, I never have to walk under the blazing sun.
“You know you didn’t get the scholarship this semester, right?”
“Yeah, I know.”
“It’s embarrassing enough that my son has to pay tuition even though his mom’s a professor.”
“I’ll get the scholarship this semester and buy you that luxury bag you’ve been wanting. I let my guard down last time.”
“Really? I’m counting on you.”
“Of course. My mom deserves to carry at least one designer bag.”
Mom does everything for me, so why shouldn’t I do something for her? This semester, I have to secure that scholarship and finally grant her long-standing wish.
“Good luck today.”
“You too, Mom.”
I got out of the car and walked to the lecture hall alone. Even though I knew it was only the first day and every class would just be orientation, my steps felt heavier than ever. It would’ve been nice to have a college friend I could complain to, someone to share the misery with… but I don’t have anyone like that.
There’s Yu-hwa, my friend’s younger sister. But we’re not close enough for me to vent to her. We just share class notes or text occasionally. Not close, not awkward—just comfortably distant.
I sat alone in a lecture hall full of strangers, the room buzzing with noise.
Right before the semester starts—corona? Talk about good luck. Most people who catch it say the first three days are so miserable they’d rather be dead. Poor guy, but I’m still jealous he gets to skip school all week.
No one offered him any comfort. Su-ho complained that we were all bastards, but what could he do? His own karma was finally catching up to him.
When class time came, the professor walked in. Even though it was just orientation, every professor teaching my classes knew my mom, so I had to be polite. I reluctantly put my phone away and focused on the orientation. At least none of them were like Professor Pang-Pang, who starts assigning homework on day one.
After the nightmare that was last semester, I’d put serious thought into building this semester’s schedule. I managed to dodge the biggest landmine—Professor Pang-Pang—but I had to give up having a completely free day. Looking at my timetable, I sighed in relief just because I avoided that disaster. I must’ve had it really rough last semester to feel this grateful.
Mom, asking me to greet someone subtly in a lecture hall with ninety students is basically mission impossible. It’d be easier to just go to the professor’s office and say hello properly.
Orientation ended, and with time to spare before the next one, I headed to Mom’s office. She wasn’t there—probably in class.
If it were still vacation, I wouldn’t have asked—I would’ve just called. It’s only the first day of the semester, yet it already feels like there’s distance between us. Well, there literally is distance now.
Since she’s attending school in another city, the chances of seeing Chae-yeon are going to be way lower than during break. If we were in the same area, we could’ve met on weekdays or weekends. It’s a little disappointing.
Whenever I meet up with my high school friends, the conversation always starts and ends with my college stories. Running into a professor on the street and high-fiving them, getting a ride home in a professor’s car after hurting my leg, professors greeting me by name even though I don’t remember their faces—my university life is basically a parade of bizarre encounters.
Chae-yeon replied with a crying cat emoji. Even her choice of stickers is cute.
Ever since Chae-yeon came to my house, she’s brought up Yu-hwa a few times. Every time she does, her tone gets… sharp. I don’t know why.
The messages with Chae-yeon stop. The professor probably noticed her texting or started covering important material. Silence settles over the office. I’ve never thought this place felt empty before, but today it does.
In the quiet space, memories of break naturally surface. Whether it was because of Chae-yeon or thanks to her, I went out a lot. I also talked about her with the guys quite a bit. After watching horror movies, she’d look at me and laugh endlessly—it was a little annoying, but it was nice seeing a side of Chae-yeon I’d never seen before.
What if I hadn’t met Chae-yeon again?
I would’ve spent the entire break alone, not knowing whether that was a good thing or a bad thing.
Four months, including break. Short if you look at it one way, long if you look at it another.
In that time, I met Chae-yeon again and grew close to her—different from when we were kids.
Honestly, I still haven’t fully adjusted. The Chae-yeon I’m used to is still the little girl who played with boys without any hesitation.
At some point, Chae-yeon started looking pretty to me.
The Chae-yeon I’d always thought of as a boy began to look like a girl, and I started wanting to look good in front of her. There were some troubles along the way, but thankfully we got past them.
If we keep spending time together like this…
How am I going to feel about Chae-yeon?