Ep.7 - Khalid (3)
Ep.7 - Khalid (3)
***
Three hours later,
inside the guest room, the quarrel had subsided.
"Phew..."
The aftermath of the fight still hadn't faded, and the air was so stifling it was hard to breathe.
It wasn't just the tension. It wasn't that they were awkwardly keeping their distance from each other—they were all awkwardly crowding close to my side instead, which made me want to die.
"I'll just... go to the bathroom for a bit..."
Unable to endure the wrecked atmosphere, I considered taking refuge in the bathroom, but even that wasn't easy.
"I shall accompany you as well!"
"Stay put! I'll go with him. Everyone else, keep guarding this place."
Afraid I might run into trouble if I wandered around alone, they all tried to follow me. They were so desperate it made me sigh.
So now I couldn't even go to the bathroom as I pleased.
Freedom was dead.
Twenty-first-century sanity was over.
"Please don't do that... I'll go with him."
Phew.
That was a relief.
Helen-ssi stepping in.
If Kaede had followed me, I would've definitely been fucked like a dog.
Ah! Besides, Helen-ssi had asked to meet me separately, so this was a chance to take care of everything at once, right?
"Y-Yeah. I'll go with Helen-ssi."
I sealed the deal with Helen's suggestion. I was going with Helen-ssi—what could they do about it?
"Kkiing... Seobang-nim..."
"I still don't trust that person. Noona will go with you."
Though Kaede and Chichi didn't readily agree,
"Well. The only ones who would be assumed to be staying in this room are myself and Eva-yang. If others were to step forward, it might cause unnecessary trouble. I'll go."
With a benevolent smile, Helen actively stepped forward and defended me.
"Both Delin-gun and Eva-yang are so adorable that you can't even compare them. If Chichi-ssi just casts a small spell, we should be able to go and come back without issue. People will simply think that Eva-yang and I are visiting the bathroom."
Huh?
What did she mean by that...?
"Y-You want me to cross-dress!? There's no need for that!"
"No. If we want to prevent any unforeseen incidents, you must not leave my sight. If Chichi-ssi casts the spell, I'll accompany you to the bathroom and bring you right back, so I ask this of you."
---------------------------------
A humiliation worse than death.
Cross-dressing, which I had vowed never to do again after the 9th grade school trip...
"No one will notice, so don't be too nervous. Just walk naturally."
"I know...!"
Since this is a gender-reversed world, cross-dressing would be taken a little differently, but I still hated cross-dressing to death...!
"Now, shall we go in?"
Under the gaze of countless people, we barely made it to the bathroom.
Fortunately, the bathroom in this other world had a toilet.
Of course, unlike the ones in my world, it was shaped like a chair so that most women could do their business comfortably.
Anyway, now that I was alone with Helen, I could sit on the toilet and rest easy, so it didn't matter.
"Ahh... seriously..."
As I sat on the toilet, a groan escaped me.
The feeling of escaping that stifling atmosphere. Liberation.
"You were wrong, Helen-ssi. They do nothing but fight. It's hopeless. There's no sign of them reconciling."
And with that liberation, my honest feelings burst out. I complained to Helen.
In a situation where we couldn't even have a proper conversation, she was asking us to save the world? Where was the sense in that stupid development?
The author was probably losing readers around here. A story in a smut novel? That was just insane.
"Don't get your hopes up. Just take me to God's Garden. Don't expect anything more than that..."
I wasn't being irresponsible.
This couldn't be helped. Even if someone else were in my place, it would've been the same.
But.
Why did she keep looking at me with those eyes?
"Delin-gun."
A deep gaze.
A faint smile.
Darkness.
She looked at me.
Her eyes didn't waver.
As if looking right through me, she stared so intently it was unnerving.
"I believe in you, Delin-gun. Don't blame yourself like that."
"It's not self-blame. I'm just telling you the truth. I don't know what the gods you believe in want, but they failed. You picked the wrong person."
I was annoyed. What did she know?
Ever since I was dragged to this other world, nothing had gone right. Nothing went my way, I got dragged around, I got fucked—this was fucking dogshit.
"I'm struggling just to look after myself. You saw them fighting, right? It's hard enough just to hold my ground between them! Stop looking at me like that—I don't know what you expect, but just drop it. I don't have the ability, and I'm just going to God's Garden..."
"And then?"
"..."
And then,
I was going to go back.
"And then, you want to run away."
Helen asked, crouching in front of me so we were eye to eye.
"You want to abandon everything, let it all go, and leave for somewhere far away. Very far. A place you won't return from."
Her eyes were strange. At once they seemed hazy from tobacco and alcohol, and yet shone clearly like the sun and moon in the sky.
"That is what you wish. I know it too. It's a sad thing, but I understand completely. An unwanted journey is a painful ordeal. God surely also wishes for Delin-gun to leave."
"...Just what are you?"
How did she keep reading my mind? How did she notice things even the other noonas could never guess?
"What kind of person are you?"
"I am God's will, mercy, and guide. I, at least, am always on Delin-gun's side."
She folded her hands over mine. Soft, but trembling slightly.
"Shall I show you?"
"What... will you show me?"
"The past. Delin-gun, do you know what this tattoo on my wrist means?"
Helen's touch wrapped around me like a night breeze.
At her touch, I unknowingly lifted my wrist.
"Delin-gun. I know. I do know. Lend me your forehead for a moment. Please..."
She gently lifted my wrist and whispered softly to it.
After a short whisper, one of her fingers traced something on the tattoo.
I didn't know what she was drawing, but the movement was so smooth that I couldn't help but watch...
"Now, Delin-gun."
My wrist gradually approached. The tattoo, now faintly glowing, came before my eyes and then pressed against my forehead.
My eyes simply gazed at Helen beyond the wrist.
"I'll show you."
--------------------------------
"Eo-heok, heok... kkeo-heok, kek..."
I couldn't breathe.
A strange sensation. My nose and mouth were open, but no air came in.
Either my senses had gone wrong, or the world had.
My wrist ached. My head throbbed just as much.
"Hyeuk, keuk... kkeuheuk..."
Once, when I ate something too spicy, I had almost passed out in the bathroom like this.
"Keuk, kkeuheuk..."
My mind went blank, my consciousness receded, and my body lurched forward without my control...
"Kkeuheuk, keuk..."
"Calm down. Calm..."
My body, which should have collapsed onto the floor, was caught by Helen and spared the fall.
Instead, my body trembled uncontrollably.
"Delin-gun. Delin-gun."
Helen called to me.
But as if a black hole had opened in the center of my body, sucking everything in, even my consciousness was being pulled toward the heart of that abyss.
"Delin-gun."
She kissed me.
Not the smell of cigars or alcohol, but the sweet scent of the woman Helen melted my body.
She tilted my head back. I swallowed the saliva she fed me as if pushing it down.
My twisted insides calmed. She soothed me.
"Paha—"
She pulled away.
The thread of saliva that had weakly connected us snapped with a tuk and fell onto my face.
"Do you see now?"
I thought I understood what she meant. I saw the past. No, was it the future? No. It was the past.
"Hueu... eu..."
"You don't have to speak. It's alright."
Helen held me between her soft breasts and whispered.
Unconsciously, welling tears wet her clothes.
"Now you understand. We're in the same boat. Ever since I met Delin-gun, my power has been growing little by little. I can see countless pasts."
She showed me the past. She showed me something I hadn't known.
"If things continue like this, something terrible will happen, so be careful. I am merely a priestess who shows the path; I cannot lead your future. You must walk it yourself. I will always be by Delin-gun's side, but the future does not always stay by your side."
She stroked me. My body, which had been trembling from something I couldn't tell was fear, anxiety, or perhaps pleasure, settled down.
"Now, will you trust me?"
I nodded. As if wiping my tears against her breasts, I nodded and told Helen,
I would trust her.
"Delin-gun. Now... there is a limit to showing you the past. From here on, you must find your own way. What will you do?"
The sensation in my body returned fully. My fingers moved, I could breathe properly,
"Hyeuk, keuk... fuuuck..."
And my voice came out properly too.
"Delin-gun?"
"Keuk, kkeuheuk..."
I saw a past that was like a future. A past intense enough to make me seize back the sanity I'd been letting slip with my stupid talk.
Tonight, everyone would fall into a deep sleep for some unknown reason. In that window, I would be raped by Riko. I would resist hard and wake everyone up, and they would all fight, keep fighting, fight again, and fight... get dragged off, get raped, get dragged off again, get raped again,
"Keuk, kkeuyuk..."
an irreversible [Bad Ending].
If I avoided the rape, Riko would kill everyone, and the surviving Kaede would kill Riko. If I Loaded, the fight would break out again, I would get dragged off by someone, get violated again, and while being violated, get dragged off by someone else—an irreversible [Bad Ending].
Even if I screamed, even if I told the noonas beforehand, even if I ran far away alone, it was a [Bad Ending].
"I get it, I get it already..."
There were a few methods that came to mind. Among them, the most plausible was...
"I've got a rough idea now..."
quietly taking it...