Expectations Were Misplaced
I felt my tension dissolve at Jiyu’s unexpected reaction.
Cute? Suddenly?
I had been certain she called me out to take advantage of my situation. I’d even mentally prepared myself for the possibility of blackmail, thinking it was only natural. But Jiyu just sat there, completely nonchalant.
"Shall we order something to drink before we talk?"
"O-oh, okay..."
Jiyu paid for the drinks. She didn't even give me a chance to reach for my wallet.
"I, I'll pay."
"It's fine. I'm the one who asked to meet, so I should at least cover this."
Jiyu flashed her signature smile. The natural dimples that appeared when the corners of her mouth lifted were charming. That smile, which I’d previously only associated with her mouth, was now paired with a crinkle in her eyes, doubling the effect. It was a strangely mischievous face that made me want to flick her forehead right then and there.
I took the buzzer and headed to our table, Jiyu leading the way. For some reason, her steps looked bouncy.
Jiyu slid into the inner seat. I didn't sit down immediately, just stood there for a moment, dazed.
"Why the look? You look like you're about to cry."
"A-ah, no..."
Self-conscious about my lack of poker face, I forced the corners of my lips upward.
"Don't just stand there. Sit."
"Right..."
I sat across from her. Since we had spent so much time working on projects and assignments together in the past, it wasn't exactly awkward. Having been forced to stick together for nearly two years, a certain level of internal intimacy had built up. Still, this was the first time we were alone together.
I stared blankly at Jiyu's mouth, then my gaze drifted to the buzzer in my hand. I wished it would hurry up and go off so our drinks would arrive. Even though I hadn't said a word, my lips were parched.
I shifted my gaze from the buzzer back to Jiyu's lips. I wanted the person who called the meeting to start the conversation, but she didn't seem to have any intention of doing so. While we sat there in silence, avoiding each other's eyes, the buzzer finally rang.
"...I'll go get them."
"Thanks~"
Jiyu's voice followed me as I walked away. I returned from the counter with the tray. Even after the drinks arrived, she still didn't seem ready to speak, so I had no choice but to break the silence.
"How did you know...?"
I got straight to the point, but Jiyu answered with effortless ease.
"Know what?"
"How did you know... that I became a girl?"
"Hmm, shall I tell you?"
"D-don't mess around. I'm being serious right now."
"It was suspicious from the moment you didn't show up to the graduation ceremony."
"People can skip graduation. You know I'm uncomfortable in crowded places... What if I just didn't go for that reason?"
"Aigoo, Eunhae-oppa—no, I'll call you Sunbae now."
Jiyu scanned my face for a moment.
"When a lab Sunbae graduated, you came to congratulate them even though it wasn't your own graduation. It's strange for someone like you to miss your own."
That was just because I felt pressured into going.
"Still, that has nothing to do with the news... There must be something else. How did you know?"
"You really want to know?"
"Yeah..."
"Hmm... what should I do?"
Jiyu tilted her head and smiled.
"What do you want...?"
Jiyu let out a laugh that sounded slightly mocking—though without any malice.
"No, Sunbae. Why are you so scared? You've looked like you were going to cry since earlier. Did you think I was going to blackmail you with this?"
At Jiyu's words, which seemed to read my mind, I gripped my hands tight.
"I wouldn't gain anything from that anyway. Your imagination is running too wild~"
If not blackmail, then what on earth was the reason?
"T-then...?"
"I just got lucky and found out, and I wanted to see your face. Isn't it fascinating that the world's first rare disease patient in the news is someone I know? There's no other reason."
It was a very simple reason. The tension in my hands vanished. I felt like there was someone else around me who had said something similar. Should I call it a sense of futility?
No, I couldn't be sure. She could be lying. Could there really be two people in this world who wanted to meet me for such a reason?
"R-really...?"
"Really. I didn't think I'd actually be able to meet you, though. I thought if it were you, you'd just say you were too lazy to meet up. ...Did you come out because you were scared? Don't tell me? No, right?"
I couldn't trust Jiyu one hundred percent, but I had no choice. There was no reason not to believe her now that we were sitting face-to-face. If she really had malicious intent, she could have just spread the truth without ever meeting me.
"So, how did you know...?"
"You're that curious? It's not really that important, is it?"
"...It is important."
Do you have any idea how much I've been worrying?
"Ah. I'll tell you. You look like you're terrified."
Jiyu covered her mouth with her index finger. Her eyes darted around the room. Her voice dropped suddenly, as if she were afraid someone might overhear.
"But you can't report me, okay? I'd be in real trouble."
Jiyu's expression was serious. Had she really dug into my information in a way that could get her reported? As long as Jiyu didn't spread my information, it didn't matter how she found out. I didn't feel the need to report her if it didn't cause me harm, and I didn't want to blow things out of proportion.
"Yeah, I won't say anything, I promise..."
Jiyu pursed her lips before opening them.
"...Actually, my dad is a police officer."
She rested her hands on the table, interlacing her fingers as she continued.
"He told me about this strange case where a woman came in claiming she was a man."
"W-wait. You..."
I asked Jiyu where her father worked. It was my hometown.
"No, Sunbae. I told you we were from the same area. This makes me a little sad."
I thought Jiyu had been unusually kind. Was this the reason?
"I was going to take good care of you, but you kept avoiding me."
"I'm sorry. B-but I wasn't avoiding you..."
"Anyway, they were just going to send her away, but the woman kept coming up as a man whenever they ran her fingerprints."
Ah, that was exactly what happened back then. The atmosphere inside the police station came back to me vividly.
"I just ignored what my dad said back then, but later, the news hit."
"Wait..."
"Yes?"
"How did you know it was me...?"
"My dad told me the name, too...? The only 'man' I know named 'Eunhae' is you... so I figured it had to be you."
Without realizing it, I leaned toward Jiyu. I didn't know much about the law, but wasn't it wrong for a police officer to share that kind of personal information with someone else?
"C-can a police officer really say things like that...?!"
"That's why I told you not to tell anyone. You'll keep your promise, right?"
"......"
Taking my silence as consent, Jiyu sucked on the straw in her drink.
"What would you have done if I wasn't the one...?"
"If it wasn't you, I would have been disappointed. But I was going to meet you anyway."
It seemed Jiyu really had called me out of pure curiosity. This thought became a certainty as we continued our conversation. While Jiyu showed plenty of playfulness in all her actions, there was no malice to be found.
The conversation naturally shifted to how we were doing.
"What have you been up to lately, Sunbae?"
"I go to the hospital every week... and I'm working."
"Working? Doing what? Heh, let me guess, working from home?"
Jiyu was overestimating me. If working from home were an option, I would have chosen it in a heartbeat. But unless you have a certain level of skill, working from home is like catching stars in the sky. It was a world away from me.
"I-it's not working from home..."
"Then what kind of work is it?"
All I was doing was...
"A-a part-time job..."
"What kind of part-time job?"
"At a cafe..."
"Really? That doesn't seem to suit you."
"What...?"
"You lack social skills, Sunbae."
"..."
"And yet you go outside. I thought you were stuck inside your house all the time."
Jiyu held the straw in her mouth, her gaze fixed somewhere on the table. It was an ambiguous remark—neither an insult nor a compliment. Still, it didn't feel bad.
"How have you been doing lately...?"
"I just got promoted from intern to a full-time employee!"
Come to think of it, I remembered Jiyu doing some internship before she even graduated college. I wasn't very interested, so I didn't know where it was.
"But the company atmosphere is a bit strange. I don't know exactly, but... you know that feeling of 'Is this right?'"
"What do you mean by strange, specifically...?"
"Hmm... I don't know enough to explain it in detail, so I'll keep that to myself. It's just a bit weird."
Jiyu's expression turned worried. I thought everything would be fine once I got a job, but I guess that wasn't the case. Not knowing how to react, I sat there like a mute who had eaten honey.
Jiyu stared right through me.
"...Sunbae, you always used to answer in one-word sentences, but you're different now. Your vibe seems to have changed, too."
"Have I...?"
Jiyu spread her fingers wide and started folding them one by one as she spoke.
"First, you never even said hello when you walked into our lab. You didn't say goodbye when you left, either. You had so little presence that I once locked the door thinking there was no one left in the lab, you know that?"
"...Yeah."
Of course I knew. Jiyu was the one who locked the door. She had turned off the lights and left, and when I turned them back on, she thought she hadn't turned them off, so she opened the door and walked back in. I couldn't forget the moment she ran into me and let out a high-frequency scream right into my ear.
"And strangely, you always participated in lab events. But during lab dinners, you'd always sit in a corner and eat quietly. And then, before we knew it, you'd disappear!"
As all of Jiyu's fingers were folded, her eyebrows tilted like a hissing cat.
"I-I always said goodbye to the professor before I left..."
"Why didn't you say goodbye to us? We're people in the same lab, too. Did you hate getting close to us that much?"
"I-it wasn't that I hated getting close... it's just..."
I stopped, not knowing what to say or which words to choose. Jiyu seized the moment of hesitation to press her point.
"Do you know that you stand out even more because you disappear so quietly? Please think about us, the ones you're drawing a line against."
It wasn't that I didn't want to get closer. I just didn't know how to go about it. I hadn't known she felt that way.
"It wasn't like that..."
"If you're not drawing a line, then keep in touch."
"Okay..."
Jiyu looked at me for a moment, then made a "Hmm" sound. Then she grinned, and in an instant, the serious expression from before vanished without a trace.
"Anyway, that's not why I met you today."
Jiyu rested her chin on both hands, wearing a meaningful smile.
"Can I ask you more questions about things I'm curious about?"