The One Who Always Returns to Me #10
Emil lay sprawled across the bed and let out a long, empty sigh.
“……Hah.”
He couldn’t remember how he had made it from the garden back to his room last night.
Of course, it wasn’t because of Alena’s kiss.
How many women had he faced until now? Would a single kiss—especially one on the cheek—be enough to rattle him?
So the reason he had tossed and turned without sleep until dawn wasn’t that, either.
Really.
Is this enough?
“……Damn it.”
Emil felt an oddly uneasy stir in his chest and retraced the events of the previous night.
He had jokingly said the queen ought to have kissed his cheek, and Alena had done exactly that.
What could it possibly mean?
“……No way. It can’t be. There’s no chance.”
The answer was simple. Yet Emil wanted to deny it with every fiber of his being.
If she truly was……
It made no sense. It couldn’t be.
She must have simply been teasing him.
She and the queen were far too different, weren’t they?
Even as he told himself that, he could not shake the thought.
Especially the way she had spoken right before they parted…… it had carried the same imperious tone as the queen’s.
In the end, he had risen at first light and asked Roen to convey his wish for an audience with Her Majesty.
“It’s not. It can’t be……”
Emil repeated the same words over and over, slumped on the bed like a man who had lost his soul.
But eventually, the answer came for him.
Knock, knock.
“……I’m inside. Come in, Roen.”
“Yes, Priest.”
Roen opened the door, took one look at Emil’s deflated form, and startled at first. Then her eyes narrowed.
“Priest, are you attempting to seduce me right now?”
“I’m curious which part of this looks that way to you… but first, state your business.”
“Ah, of course. Her Majesty has agreed to see you, Priest. However……”
“However?”
Roen let the word trail off, her voice tinged with unease.
“By any chance, Priest… did something happen between you and Her Majesty?”
“……Why would you think that?”
“Well, she seemed to have been waiting for it. She said she wished to see you before I could even finish my sentence. It felt rather strange.”
What? Damn it.
Every word Roen spoke added another layer of credibility to Emil’s growing suspicion.
“I see… so that’s how it is.”
“Then you truly did meet with Her Majesty?”
“I’m not certain… perhaps.”
Emil buried his face in his hands for a moment, but he had no choice but to rise.
He would have to meet her and speak face to face.
“Then let us go……”
Emil forced his heavy body upright.
The lingering warmth on the bedsheets seemed to cling to him, reluctant to let him leave.
“……Hoo.”
Just before stepping out the door, Emil paused and caught his reflection in the mirror.
His expression was the same as always, yet his golden eyes trembled with a will of their own.
Alena.
If she truly was the queen, why had she played such a prank on him? Just what……
Emil shook his head and exhaled.
Enough with the groundless speculation. He would know soon enough. Directly, from her own lips.
Roen took the lead, and Emil followed a few steps behind, walking slowly down the corridor.
He straightened his priestly robes with meticulous care.
Today, the dark fabric felt strangely cumbersome. The collar seemed to tighten around his throat, and the waist cord dug in as if trying to bind him.
It never bothered me before.
He drew a long breath as he walked.
The hallway was steeped in its usual silence; the only sound was the echo of their footsteps against the stone.
Today, even that rhythm scraped against his nerves.
Click. Click.
When they finally reached the queen’s reception room after winding through the palace corridors, Roen spoke with careful formality.
“I will escort you inside.”
“……Please do.”
The door opened. A familiar fragrance washed over him, and there she was.
Emil felt a sharp twist in his gut.
Damn it.
It was Alena.
Unlike the loose hair he had seen in the garden, hers was now twisted up in an elegant knot, but there was no mistaking her.
The fact that she wore no helmet—unlike their first meeting—made it clear she no longer intended to conceal her identity.
“You wished to see me? Priest.”
The queen remained seated and spoke quietly.
At the sound of her voice, the scene from last night flashed before Emil’s eyes once more.
“Yes. There is something I wish to say to Your Majesty.”
The queen took a slow sip of tea. Her face remained expressionless, yet a hint of mischief danced in her eyes.
She spoke as though the matter were trivial.
“Are you angry with me over what happened last night?”
A brief silence fell.
Roen swallowed audibly and shot Emil a sidelong glance.
Her eyes seemed to ask, Priest? Last night? Exactly what did you do?
Emil deliberately ignored the weight of that stare and answered.
“It is not like that.”
“I would understand if you were. Still, I never meant to deceive you. It was simply amusing that you did not recognize me……”
She smiled faintly.
“Of course, I will not hold you accountable for those rather treasonous remarks you made about the royal family.”
Roen nearly choked.
The gaze she turned on him grew even more painful.
Royal blasphemy. Damn it all.
But it was true. He had cursed the queen thoroughly while speaking to Alena.
“Your Majesty, I… I did not mean it that way.”
“No, I am not blaming you. In hindsight, my own manner of speech was rather poor. I have never been particularly eloquent.”
Then the way Alena had interpreted the queen’s words had simply been her own opinion after all.
Only now did Emil understand.
“I wanted to apologize to you, but your misunderstanding made it difficult to speak plainly.”
“I am ashamed.”
“There is no need for you to apologize. If anyone should, it is I. You saved Irenie’s life, yet I treated you with such coldness.”
At those words, Emil recalled the events of the previous night and felt an awkward heat rise in his cheeks.
“Yes. I hope my kiss did not offend you. I had hoped it might ease your mood.”
“Cough—cough—cough!”
Emil broke into a violent fit of coughing while Roen stared at him in open horror.
Priest? A kiss? What exactly did you do?!
Damn it, stop looking at me like that.
It had been a joke!
“……It was an honor, of course.”
“I am glad. Then that should suffice, no? Or do you desire more?”
“How could I possibly dare… Your Majesty. The words I spoke that day were merely a jest. If they caused you any displeasure……”
“A jest? What a shame.”
A shame?
What part of it was a shame?
Emil pressed his lips tightly together.
Do not overthink it. She is merely toying with you.
He fought to keep his composure.
Her tone was so perfectly casual that it somehow sounded sincere, and that was the problem.
“Please refrain from embarrassing me any further.”
When the words finally left him, the queen lifted one elegant brow.
“Is that so? It was quite an enjoyable conversation for me. Was it not the same for you?”
“I… that day I not only behaved rudely but also revealed my own foolishness. If Your Majesty would grant me mercy, I beg you to forget it ever happened.”
Emil finished speaking and drew a quiet breath.
It was an apology, yes. But it was also a warning.
A courteous request that this uncomfortable topic not be raised again.
Yet the queen showed not the slightest trace of remorse.
If anything, she looked perfectly at ease.
After a brief pause, she spoke again, as though the true conversation were only now beginning.
“Priest. Since this is a good opportunity, I would like to speak seriously with you. May I?”
“Of course, Your Majesty.”
A serious discussion.
She set her teacup down and adjusted her posture.
“Where should I begin… Ah, yes. Do you know why I sent Sir Neil to find you?”
What did she mean by that?
The sudden question left him momentarily speechless.
Wasn’t it obviously for Leni?
“……Was it not for the sake of the princess?”
“No. Had that been the case, I would have sent someone else. Sir Neil is far too talented to be wasted on retrieving a single priest.”
The queen spoke with crisp finality.
She began her explanation slowly, deliberately.
“I calculate everything. War, diplomacy, even my affection for my own family. And though it may be unpleasant for you to hear, curing Irenie’s curse was never an urgent priority for me.”
Emil felt a chill settle in his chest.
It was like reliving their very first meeting.
“……You speak with such brutal honesty.”
“I believe you are a man capable of bearing the truth.”
She offered a calm smile.
Yet the smile was so detached it felt almost cruel.
“Therefore, I will be honest with you now as well. The reason I sought you was not to break the curse. It was to control it.”
“Control……”
A dark premonition gripped him.
But the queen continued without concern.
“The war is not yet over. I must take the field once more. However, there will be no next campaign. I will make certain of it. And so your role, Priest, is to accompany Irenie on the coming expedition.”