The One Who Always Returns to Me #11
“……I cannot allow that.”
Emil spoke to the queen in a voice so icy it was unlike anything he had ever uttered before.
Even Roen flinched at the tone.
What the hell is this woman saying?
She wanted to take Leni to the battlefield?
And the true meaning behind her words……wasn’t she saying she would use Leni as a weapon?
Goddamn it. This was utter nonsense.
Was she truly in her right mind?
Yet the queen showed not the slightest sign of being intimidated as she reminded him,
“It seems you are under a misunderstanding, Priest. You have no right to refuse.”
“No, I do have that right.”
“And what right would that be?”
“Because I saved Leni’s life!”
Emil shouted the words directly into the queen’s face.
Roen grabbed him in a panic.
“P-Priest, please calm yourself for a moment……”
“Step aside, Roen.”
He violently shook off her hand.
“Do you understand? Listen carefully, Your Majesty. If someone told you they were going to slit that noble throat of yours, would you simply stand there? Would you not assert that damned ‘right’? Damn it, I know I wouldn’t!”
“……I never said I would kill you.”
The queen faltered slightly, but answered in a tone that remained eerily calm.
However, Roen’s face, standing beside Emil, had gone deathly pale, as if she might collapse at any second.
In truth, considering the rudeness Emil had just committed, it would not have been strange for Roen to draw her sword and attempt to execute him on the spot.
Yet the queen herself, the one who had been insulted, remained perfectly composed, leaving Roen at a complete loss.
Whether she was or not, Emil could no longer contain his fury.
“It amounts to the same thing. I gave my life to save the princess. Not because I wanted something in return, not because I thought she had any chance of survival—I did it simply because she had become more precious to me than my own life!”
“So you would assert the right to claim your own life in exchange for Irenie’s?”
“Yes. Exactly that. Do you understand now? I will assert my ‘right’ not to take her to that godforsaken battlefield. If you cannot accept that, then cut my throat here and now.”
Emil ground his teeth audibly.
Go ahead. Try to kill me.
Ever since the incident in Iredain, Emil’s life had become something of far less value than Leni’s.
There was no need to cling to it any longer.
“……”
The queen stared quietly into Emil’s eyes for a long moment before finally letting out a sigh.
“Haa… Goodness, it seems I truly have no talent for words. I appear to have caused you quite the misunderstanding…… Ah, would you allow me to clear it up?”
Her tone sounded almost pitiful, and both Roen and Emil froze in place.
What kind of reaction was this?
Emil, who had been expecting a cold rebuttal, was utterly thrown off balance.
The queen sighed once more and continued.
“Priest Emil, it seems you have misunderstood. I certainly said I would take Leni with me, but I never once mentioned placing her on the battlefield.”
“Don’t play with words. That ultimately amounts to—”
“Listen until the end, Priest. Gildeon Esterien, the leader of the rebellion, was once my closest confidant. Therefore, there are still those among my soldiers who follow him.”
The queen clutched her head as if suffering from a headache and began to explain.
“Look at what happened in Iredain. The troops I sent with Neil to rescue Irenie were neatly handed over to Gildeon. I have no intention of repeating that mistake.”
“What does that have to do with this conversation?”
“I told you to listen until the end. If I were to leave Irenie alone in Myrdin and depart, what do you think would happen? Gildeon would undoubtedly plot something. That is why I could not leave Myrdin, and why the front lines have remained in stalemate until now.”
The queen shook her head and rose from her seat.
“But that ends now. With you here, I can march with Irenie at my side, and this tiresome rebellion will finally come to a close.”
“Then……are you saying you have no intention of using the princess’s curse in battle?”
“Of course not. I would never place such a burden on a child that young. You must think me a truly terrible person.”
At the queen’s explanation, Emil was rendered speechless.
In other words, the queen had never planned to use Leni as a weapon.
Rather, she had been so worried for her sister that she had been unable to properly take the field until now.
Even so, Emil could not fully accept it and asked,
“But……Your Majesty. Did you not tell me earlier that you sought me not to cure the curse, but to control it?”
“Ah, that is true. Irenie’s curse can become a weapon to protect herself in times of emergency. I have no intention of using it in battle, but I cannot simply leave her vulnerable either. As I said, I am surrounded by enemies on all sides.”
The words the queen spoke were similar to what Pidea had once said.
That it would be better to let her protect herself using the curse if necessary.
At the time, Emil had opposed the idea, but after the events in Iredain, his heart had changed.
If she could survive by using the curse, then wasn’t that the right thing to do?
“Do you understand now? Or do you still not believe me? Or perhaps you think I simply fabricated all of this to suit my needs?”
Emil lowered his head.
No matter how he looked at it, she did not appear to be lying. At least, not in his eyes.
When he remained silent, the queen smiled as she gazed at him.
“As I said before, I have no intention of blaming you. In fact, I was moved. To know that beside my sister stands a priest who cherishes and loves her more than his own life.”
The queen rose and approached Emil.
He instinctively stepped back, but she placed her hands on his shoulders.
“And I must apologize for my poor choice of words. I can see how you would have misunderstood. Will you forgive me?”
“Your Majesty, I…… I am truly sorry.”
She placed both arms on Emil’s shoulders and leaned in, staring at his face as if clinging to him.
“Why do you not answer? Priest. Does this mean you will never forgive me?”
“That is not it, Your Majesty. It is only that……please forgive my rudeness.”
“No, you must forgive me. Quickly now.”
The queen whispered into Emil’s ear, her voice tickling him.
Her lips brushed against his earlobe.
“Or……hmm, must I show you my sincerity like I did last night?”
Damn it.
Even without looking in a mirror, Emil was certain his face had turned bright red.
The burning heat in his cheeks proved it.
“—Ahem. That will be enough, Your Majesty.”
Fortunately, salvation arrived at that moment.
Roen, who had been standing behind them, could no longer bear to watch and stepped in.
“Your jokes are going too far.”
“Hmm, do you truly think so, Roen?”
“Yes. The priest is clearly flustered.”
The queen smiled mischievously and stepped back.
“Well……I suppose it was a bit much.”
Goodness. The day had finally come when he felt grateful to Roen.
The woman he had only ever thought of as a perverted knight suddenly felt incredibly reliable for the first time.
“Very well. You may leave now, Priest. I will forget all the heated words you spoke in the heat of the moment. However, continue to take good care of Irenie. Understood?”
“Yes, as you command, Your Majesty……”
Emil let out a sigh of relief as he withdrew.
“……Haa.”
As he walked down the corridor after leaving the room, Emil’s face still looked dazed.
His cheeks remained flushed as if the heat had yet to subside, and his mind was a chaotic mess, overflowing with all the words and emotions that had poured out at once.
Roen, watching him, finally burst into laughter.
“Pfft…… Priest, you cannot walk around with a face like that. The maids will misunderstand.”
“……”
He started to glare at her but turned his head away instead.
He had nothing to say.
Damn it, damn it all! This was the first time he had ever been so flustered in front of a woman.
He wasn’t some adolescent boy……blushing at every single word.
As he thought this, Roen spoke again, her voice laced with amusement.
“Don’t be too embarrassed. Her Majesty has always been like that.”
“……What do you mean?”
“She enjoys teasing people. She did it to me quite often when I was young.”
She gave a bitter smile and nodded.
“Every time I made a mistake, she would say things like ‘You’re so clumsy you’ll never get married’ or ‘Just live with me forever.’ Back then I thought she was serious and would cry all night like a fool. Perhaps the reason I became a knight was because I couldn’t endure her teasing anymore.”
“……”
Emil looked at her in silence. Roen was still smiling, but beyond that smile, a faint trace of longing flickered across her face.
“But as for playing such tricks on a man……honestly, as far as I know, you are the first, Priest.”
“……Are you trying to comfort me, or are you trying to embarrass me even more?”
“Neither. I just……felt a little envious.”
This time, even Emil was left momentarily speechless.
Roen turned her gaze to the path ahead and quietly added,
“Her Majesty has always been a lonely person. That is why, since she was young, she has had the habit of testing people. Perhaps it was a kind of defensive instinct—to see whether it was safe to show her true feelings.”
Roen smiled faintly and nodded.
“Yes. If it had been anyone but you, Priest, she probably would not have apologized in that manner. Now you understand what kind of person she is, don’t you?”
“……It seems so.”
Emil pressed a hand to his forehead and let out a deep sigh.
It had been a day filled with complicated emotions.
Anger and misunderstanding, distrust and fury, and……some strange feeling he could not quite name.
He still did not know what to call that emotion, but one thing was certain.
Emil could not win against the queen.
It seemed he might have met his natural enemy.