Reversal (13)
A world that refuses to bend to my will.
It makes me want to smash everything to pieces and erase it all as if it had never existed.
I never imagined I’d harbor such destructive urges.
I kept closing my eyes and opening them again, praying I’d wake up in my own house, but the scene in front of me refused to change.
A needlessly luxurious pension. An irritatingly perfect view.
I toweled my wet hair just enough to stop water from dripping, slipped into the swimsuit he’d brought me, and stepped out of the room.
If it had been some sleazy excuse for a swimsuit, I really would have bolted out barefoot.
It was an ordinary bikini that could have passed for a photoshoot, so I barely managed to tolerate it. Even then, I had no desire to show it off, so I threw a t-shirt over top.
It was the same shirt I’d left behind the last time I visited Hinami’s place.
Thinking about that now, after everything that had happened to me, felt strangely twisted.
“Follow me.”
The moment I left the room, Kang Juhyuk—who wore nothing on his upper body—gestured at me.
Surprisingly, he didn’t order me to take off the t-shirt. He didn’t even touch me. Just that single commanding gesture.
I trailed after his back as he walked ahead in nothing but loose swim trunks, never once glancing my way. My own steps were heavy.
There couldn’t be anything special about a pension pool, and he wasn’t about to drown me, so I wasn’t particularly afraid.
He probably wasn’t planning to rape me there, either.
If he’d wanted to cross that line, he’d had dozens of chances already.
He could have taken me the moment I let him between my thighs. No need to drag me all the way out here.
“…Get in. And keep your voice down.”
“Why?”
“You’ll see.”
So whether he filmed some AV or IV right in front of me, it wasn’t my problem.
Hinami was obviously in there too. He clearly intended to use me as an audience while the two of them did filthy things again.
Why did they enjoy showing such dirty sides of themselves to other people?
If it were something beautiful, something worth bragging about, I could understand. But why expose something so vulgar and low-class?
Kang Juhyuk could do it. If I chalked it up to a man’s typical need to show off, it wasn’t completely incomprehensible.
But Hinami…
“Ah, oppa!”
“When did you even do your makeup?”
“I only put on some manicure? How does it look? It suits me, right?”
In the pool attached to the pension.
Wearing a bikini that looked like it belonged on a magazine shoot.
What exactly did she think was going to happen to her that she’d even let them cover her eyes?
“You didn’t wear earplugs, did you?”
“Ehehe, they get wet. It’s such a hassle if water gets in my ears.”
“Yeah, I figured. Come here.”
He dipped his feet into the surprisingly large pool, pulled a pair of earplugs from his swim trunks, and gently pushed them into Hinami’s ears.
Deprived of both sight and sound, she didn’t look afraid at all. Instead she smiled brightly and leaned completely against Kang Juhyuk as he touched her.
Unable to wedge myself between them in any way, I could only stand there like an idiot—just like yesterday—and watch.
…Would ripping them apart make me feel better?
Would tearing their relationship to shreds ease this pressure in my chest?
The strange impulse slithering up from the depths of my heart urged me on, but every time it did, the grotesque image of him stabbing a utility knife into his own shoulder flashed through my mind. So I simply crossed my arms and leaned against the wall.
“Mmm… What are we doing now?”
“Something dirty.”
“What? I can’t hear you.”
“You can hear just fine. Those earplugs aren’t that good.”
“Ehehe, you caught me. …But if you whisper, I really can’t hear anything. The water sounds super quiet too.”
“…Is that so?”
Completely cut off from the two of them, I leaned against the wall and stared blankly, preparing once again to play the role of audience.
I didn’t want to watch. I wouldn’t give any reactions. I certainly wouldn’t pay. But if that man’s icy gaze was fixed on Hinami instead of me, that was reason enough.
In the moment I hoped those two perverts would forget I existed and entertain themselves,
“Wait here a second. Stay right there and don’t move.”
“Okay.”
The man who had been submerged climbed out of the pool.
With wet feet slapping against the tile, he walked straight over to his audience.
“…Come with me. Don’t make a sound.”
“…”
In a whisper so quiet it wouldn’t reach past the earplugs.
He dragged me into the play.
“Oppa?”
“Just wait a little longer. …I’ll do something fun for you.”
“…Okay.”
With my wrist caught in the male lead’s grip, I was pulled onto the stage and simultaneously dragged underwater.
Hidden beneath the loud splash of him jumping in, in complete secrecy.
So the female lead far away—unable to see or hear—would never notice.
“What the hell are you trying to do?”
“Who knows. That’s for you to decide.”
“…Decide what?”
He placed my hand on his chest.
Letting me feel the eerily slow beat of his heart in secret.
“Choose. Me or Hinami. …Or neither. Whatever you want.”
He offered me a variety of choices.
“…Choose what, exactly?”
“Whether you’ll just watch from here. Play with me. Or play with her. If there’s something that looks more interesting, do whatever you like.”
Every single option was garbage I hated.
“Are you fucking kidding me?”
“Yeah. I’m kidding. …Because I think she’d enjoy this.”
“Ha…”
His ridiculous suggestion was so absurd I wanted to climb out of the pool immediately.
But the grip on my wrist was too strong. I couldn’t run.
Not until I gave him an answer he would accept.
“Choose. Whether you’ll just keep watching no matter what I do. Or do whatever the fuck you want.”
“…”
I could never escape this place.
Even if I broke free and climbed out of this pool.
Even if I ran away from the pension.
Even if I went home and buried myself in bed.
As long as I didn’t quit being an idol, I could never escape him.
Or Hinami.
“Hurry up and choose. Before she takes the blindfold off.”
“…Move.”
I shoved him aside and walked through the splashing water toward my friend, who had been robbed of both sight and hearing.
A being as beautiful and radiant as the masked version of myself.
A woman who had been dirtied as vulgarly as she was beautiful.
I stood tall in front of her as she kept her lips pressed tightly together, eagerly awaiting her man’s reward.
“Oppa? Ah, ehehe…”
I untied the strings of her wet swimsuit with my own hands.
Making sure not to let my fingers brush her skin.
So she wouldn’t realize the touch belonged to another girl.
“…”
Mocking the face full of anticipation, I moved excruciatingly slowly.
Revealing her small, delicate breasts that were even smaller than mine.
I stripped her.
“…Hey. I didn’t tell you to go that far.”
“Shut up.”
The man who had crept up behind me without my noticing whispered nonsense into my ear.
So what the hell did he want from me?
This was what he’d ordered. I was doing exactly what he wanted, wasn’t I?
Right now, the moment I decided, I could end everything.
I didn’t even need to remove the blindfold.
Just raising my voice a little would be enough.
“…It tickles, oppa.”
Unaware of our whispers, Hinami—now fully immersed in the act—began letting out soft, girlish moans.
It was so pathetic and ridiculous that I covered my mouth with one hand and stroked her head.
Careful not to let her feel my actual skin.
Tapping, tapping against her crown like bouncing my palm.
The more I stroked her white hair, the brighter she smiled, clearly delighted by the touch.
“…”
She was probably smiling happily behind the blindfold too.
With a smile neither I nor her fans had ever seen.
Pouring out all her affection for him.
The more I thought about it, the more disgusting Hinami seemed.
And the more envious I became.
“…Aren’t you going to suck her tits today?”
“…”
“Pink nipples of an active idol. Not many people get to enjoy them as much as they want… You must have incredible patience, oppa.”
The more I watched her grab her own exposed breasts and shape them into a heart for me, the stronger the feeling grew.
I was envious that she had no common sense.
Envious that she had no morals.
Envious that she could treat her fans like idiots, mock them freely, and feel zero guilt.
Even if a scandal exploded tomorrow and forced her to quit being an idol, the only thing she’d complain about would be not being able to make dirty jokes about her job with Kang Juhyuk. She wouldn’t even seem to regret it. I was envious of that too.
If only I could be a crazy bitch like her, things would be so much easier.
“Mmm…”
Instead of secretly posting petty, childish hate on anonymous tweets no one would ever see.
Instead of getting vicarious satisfaction from reading Sua unnie’s tweets telling antis to fuck off and live their real lives.
It would feel so refreshing if I could flip off both Kang Juhyuk and my worst fans and laugh in their faces.
“…Oppa’s being awfully quiet today. That’s why you made me wear earplugs, isn’t it?”
“…”
And,
It would feel so thrilling if I could slap that cheek of hers.
If I could climb on top of Kang Juhyuk and rain down punches, it would release all this stress.
While she watched.
While the fans watched.
It would be so entertaining if they got angry at me for it.
“Um, oppa…? O…up… uup…”
Unable to suppress that destructive impulse any longer,
I grabbed the hair of the girl who looked in my direction but couldn’t see me, shoved her head underwater,
Then wrapped my arms around the man who had flinched in surprise and tried to pull me off.
“Puha… Ah. What is this? Oppa, isn’t this too hard…?”
“…You really are an idiot.”
No matter how hard he tried to pry me off,
I clung to him so tightly I wouldn’t budge.
Pressing my soaked t-shirt against his body.
Squeezing until it felt like my waist would snap.
“…Ah. Ahahaha…”
Using the laughter echoing behind me as background music,
I imagined my friend’s furious face.
“What the hell, Jia? …So that phone call was real?”
“You thought it was fake?”
“Puhuhuhu…”
For some reason,
Instead of getting angry, she sounded delighted as she splashed her way over to me.
“…So Jia, you decided to join us after all.”
“What?”
Splash.
I felt her breasts press against my back through the thin fabric.
“Good job. Playing with oppa is seriously so much fun.”
“What are you—”
Splash again.
This time I felt Hinami’s wet breasts against my back with nothing between us.
“Did you think I’d be jealous? I’m not. …I care about both you and oppa. If you two make up… I’m totally in favor.”
Common sense.
Morals—everything had collapsed inside Hinami.
I felt her hands as they slid under my rolled-up t-shirt.
“I don’t have that kind of taste, but… if that’s what you like, Jia, I’ll play along. …Oppa has just a tiny bit of that taste too. He’ll enjoy it.”
“Hey…!”
“Don’t talk shit after you already stripped her, Jia. …You like tormenting people too, don’t you?”
I had no choice but to look up at him, pleading with my eyes.
Begging him to let me go back to being a mere audience.
“…”
He simply looked down at us—me and Hinami completely overlapping.
Pressing his swollen cock, still trapped in his swim trunks, hard against my stomach.
“…It’s been a while since I had this much fun. Go on.”
“…Yes.”
He removed the blindfold from Hinami’s forehead,
Then placed it over my own eyes.
In this strange swimming pool where common sense and morals,
Even the very concept of jealousy, no longer existed.