Performance Rises Like a Gaussian Function
My performance rises like a Gaussian function. (1)
I woke up after a good night's sleep only to find that something massive had happened. The cafe had gone completely insane. Not in a bad way, though—two hundred new members had joined. That was insane. Stuff like this only happened in the early days. No, this was a huge deal. Was Mark always this kind of game? The kind that suddenly spikes at the top? Microsoft’s chairman must be an amazing person. So kind. Such a good heart. He basically saved someone’s life. I’m really grateful. Hahaha!!
“Fighting!! Fighting today too.”
Back then I didn’t know anything, my skills were lacking, and I couldn’t grow, so even when opportunities came I couldn’t grab them. But things were very, very different now. This time I had to seize it. This time I could do it. I’d grown. I could do it! I could!!
“Yeah. I can do it!!”
Still, times like this were exactly when I needed to listen to experts. Mom always said so. Don’t just watch weird stuff and fall into confirmation bias—listen to experts and make your own judgment. Never rely on random online know-it-alls for information. She told me it was really important and to memorize it. I might not listen to everything Mom says, but I do follow her advice. So… the expert here would be Maru!!
“Ring ring. Ring ring ring. Maru? Are you asleep?”
“Yeees… hello?”
“Oh?! It’s Seon-a. Were you sleeping?”
“No… I just woke up. What’s up?”
Maru’s voice was thick with sleep.
“Really? I have something to tell you!! It’s super important.”
“Important? What happened?”
“I need your advice, Maru. Really. Did you see the Mark server?”
“I didn’t see everything… just bits and pieces? Stuff that got posted in the cafe?”
“Ah!! That’s already huge. That’s why I’m worried.”
“You’re doing great~”
Just hearing Maru’s voice made energy surge through me.
“S-so I’m going to work even harder!! Maru. I’m really going to work super hard. Ah! Right. That’s why I called. I wanted to hear your advice!! I really need it!!”
“Huh?”
“My viewers have been pouring in.”
“Oh! That’s good news.”
“But… I can’t keep them. Yesterday while I was gaming… I didn’t talk at all and everyone left. I definitely hit five thousand during the guild meeting, you know? But when I went solo hunting it dropped to two thousand, then barely held at one thousand. Honestly, if I’d kept going it probably would’ve collapsed below a thousand.”
“No, that’s amazing. Look how far you’ve come.”
“This? I completely tanked it. I wiped everything out. Waaah…”
I was being completely honest, but all I heard was Maru laughing.
“That happens. You’re doing fine. It’s normal. Everyone goes through it, so don’t beat yourself up.”
“No!! I have to be different!! I have to do better. That way… I can play with you, Maru!!”
“Aww~ We’re already playing together right now.”
“No!! We can’t really play even if we want to. This isn’t real playing. I need to get stronger.”
“Why?”
“Why…? So we can have more fun together!! Right now I’m not even using fifty percent of my strength.”
More laughter. I couldn’t read Maru’s intentions at all. Why was she just laughing? It was driving me crazy with curiosity.
“Haha. Yeah, you’re right. That’s why you called, because you want to get stronger.”
“Yes…!! That’s right. How can I keep them?”
“Hmm… I don’t really know either? But usually the big guild leaders pull in a lot of viewers.”
“Guild leaders? What do you mean?”
“Ah… the thing you did as the leader. The position where everyone can see you? It’s hard to explain… Anyway, that’s what you’re doing right now. Those streams naturally attract floating viewers. Once they’ve seen everything, it’s hard to keep them from leaving.”
“Hmm… I see.”
“Instead, because they see you clearly… your numbers rise like a Gaussian function. It’s not like you think—five hundred today, five hundred ten tomorrow, five hundred twenty the day after… seven hundred a month later. It jumps from five hundred to two thousand or three thousand all at once because of some trigger.”
“O-oh!!”
I didn’t know what a Gaussian function was, but okay.
“You’re doing really well right now.”
“I’m not doing well at all!! I don’t talk when I game. Did you see? Maru, did you watch me? I go three or four hours without saying anything. So I’m trying really hard to talk. I think about it, but it doesn’t come out well. How do I talk better?”
“That’s tough… You just have to keep trying, right?”
“Hmm… I see.”
“You’re definitely doing well. You’re growing so fast. Good job. Fighting, our Seon-a~”
“Uh… Yes!! I’ll grow quickly and come to your side, Maru!!”
“Hehe. I’ll be waiting.”
Wait!! Really? I blurted out excitedly.
“You’re really waiting? I’ll work super hard. I’ll grow like crazy so we can stream together!! I’m really going to try my best.”
“Okay~”
“Yes!! I’m going now!!”
“Was the advice helpful?”
“Uh… um… yeah?”
“Yeah? It wasn’t, was it?”
“No… half? About half? I’ll figure out the rest myself!!”
Honestly, none of it helped. The advice was completely useless. Maru had never been a small streamer, so she didn’t get it. She had no small-streamer sensibility at all. She was always up high and didn’t know what the air down here felt like. Yeah, it was my fault for asking a genius. I’ll just have to figure it out on my own. At least I got to hear Maru’s voice—that’s good enough!!
“Anything else you’re curious about?”
“I’ve figured everything out!!”
“Okay. Got it~ Call again if you have more questions~”
“Yes! Thank you!!”
I immediately started streaming. In the end, I had to figure it out myself… and to do that, I had to turn the stream on.
“Hello everyone. I’m playing Mark again today. I’ve grown like a Gaussian function.”
Honestly, I still didn’t know what a Gaussian function was. But that was the only thing I remembered from what Maru said.
“N-no. I’ve grown like a Gaussian function. But what is a Gaussian function?”
What even was a Gaussian function? I should’ve looked it up before starting the stream. I forgot. I typed it into the internet. The moment I saw it, I understood.
Aha!! So it’s a gradual rise. I’d studied a bit. I knew exponential functions, right? Of course I did. Those ones that shoot straight up. This wasn’t that—it was more like… step, step, step. Ah~ Got it.
“I’m a Gaussian-function kind of girl.”
“Ah, no. Let’s start the stream. Today… I’ll check the cafe first. I haven’t looked at it in a while, right?”
I logged into the cafe. It felt much livelier than before. Back then most posts were just diary entries… now there were random posts and lots of memes reposted from other communities.
“There are more meme posts, more diary posts, more ‘I ate’ posts too. I like it. The cafe is becoming really nice.”
I read through the posts one by one.
“Seon-a. You’re the guild leader, so act like one. How long are you going to keep asking for things? That’s a good post.”
“Oh… that was a good post. Everyone, don’t swear—leave feedback here instead. Why are you cursing in the chat…!!”
If you don’t like it, join the cafe and argue there. Why dump it in the chat? This is exactly why I have to ban people.
“Fighting in the cafe increases activity, right? Good question. Floating viewers might not know, but I used to argue with admins in game community cafes, so I can handle this. As long as there’s no vulgar swearing, it’s fine. Wait a second… do I have it saved?”
I felt like I’d saved something. Or maybe not? I was the type to save things like this properly… I liked collecting acorns. It should be there if I looked. I switched the screen to black and searched the cloud.
“No, guys, hold on. There should be something. I save