The Virtuous Woman's Variant Play
This isn’t a script. Let me show you an anomalous play. (4)
“Wait, what? You actually did it?” Joseph exclaimed in surprise.
Of course I did. I always keep my word. I’m not the type to make empty promises or throw tantrums.
“See? It’s real. I’m someone who knows how to pull off anomalous plays. Mwahahaha. Surprised, right?”
“Yeah. I’m surprised. Here, have a Good Kid Award.”
“Ooh!! Really? As expected of a girl. A real girl.”
“Ahahaha. I’m a real girl, you know?”
Moddeok gave me a reward. That’s how it should be—reward good behavior. She’s such a generous person. She even gave me five million won. I’ll repay her by pulling five S-rank mounts. Just trust me. I’ve stacked enough for it. Moddeok made the right choice.
“A real girl…!!”
She never expected this kind of anomalous female play. Truly virtuous women really do play differently.
Hold on…?! There’s one more virtuous woman among the deputy guild masters.
“Maem, you give me some too.”
“M-me? Why me?”
“Because you’re a virtuous woman too, Maem.”
“Ehehehehehe.”
“Look at that. So very virtuous. So hand it over. I’ll only accept from the girls. Don’t give me anything from Raming!”
I won’t take money from anyone who isn’t a real woman. This is what true anomalous play looks like.
“Uh… that’s not it. Raming is definitely a girl. And she’s pretty too!! But her girl power is lacking. No, she’s not ugly.”
“Wh-what are you saying?!”
“I mean… you’re the one who suddenly said Raming’s face got wrecked!! I couldn’t just let that slide. Why would you talk about our Raming like that…!”
Our Raming is pretty. But her girl power is insufficient. Looks and girl power can be proportional or inversely proportional. That’s what I’m trying to get across.
“No, just ignore it. That kind of thing.”
“I can’t ignore it. You’re trying to drive a wedge between us!!”
“Ignore stuff like that.”
“I can’t. I have to say something!!”
“Ignore it!!”
“Fine… I’ll put this money to good use.”
Raming gave me five million won to shut me up, so I managed to hold it in. Money really is the best. That wasn’t my intention, but… well, as long as I made money, it’s fine.
“Thanks. I’ll use it well. So that’s five million from Moddeok, five million from Raming… Maem? Ah… two million… Thank you.”
“Ehehehe. I gave you all my money.”
“Really?”
“Yeahhh. I’m a beggar now. I’m going hunting.”
“Wait a second.”
Taking money from a beggar doesn’t look good. What would that make me? I’m supposed to be a paladin and guild leader… extorting money from a beggar? That’s one hundred percent going to cause rumors.
“I’ll give the money back, Maem. You can give it to me once you’re rich again. This just looks bad. It’s like a believer shaking down a beggar. I’m definitely not that kind of person.”
I handed the money back.
“Come back when you’re bigger.”
“Ehehehehe. I’m still not giving you more money though.”
“It’s because my conscience is bothering me. We’re not the Beggar Cult. We’re the third-ranked guild. We should live up to our reputation.”
“We’re fourth now.”
Joseph gave me a heads-up.
“Why?”
“The deputy guild masters didn’t use the money to recruit members. They all spent it on personal greed…”
“Ah… So we’re a ‘more viewers’ guild now?”
That was shocking.
“A ‘more viewers’ guild? What’s that?”
Joseph… he really doesn’t know. Then I’ll have to teach him. Should I ask? Sigh… Still, he’s the most competent one, so I’ll put up with it.
“It’s a guild you only see if you press ‘more viewers.’ It means we’re that humiliatingly low-ranked.”
“Ah…”
“This won’t do. I’m going to do a major overhaul. Give me all the money. Deputy guild masters, hand over all your money. Wait a moment.”
I prostrated myself with a pious heart.
“Maru! Maru. Is collecting money from the deputy guild masters the right thing to do right now? ‘It is.’ As expected of Maru!! Thank you. Maru… may I use force? Or should I do it peacefully? ‘Take it!!’ Kyaa!! Thank you. Great Maru!!”
The chat window suddenly exploded with messages. Most of them were about how embarrassing this was.
“Augh. So embarrassing. Seriously, Jangham… Augh. Augh. Augh. My face is burning up.”
Moddeok muttered quietly, like a mouse that had died.
Was I really that bad? Still, being a “more viewers” guild is even more humiliating. Everyone has different things that embarrass them… I’ll understand. Yeah, I’ll understand.
“Just because it’s embarrassing doesn’t mean the ‘more viewers’ guild becomes third place. Someone had to do it. Please cooperate, everyone. Let’s quickly increase our guild members and climb the rankings again. I’ll be collecting money, so hand it all over.”
Over the next thirty minutes, I converted the 62 million won the deputy guild masters had been hoarding into six new guild members.
“Then please recruit well, Joseph.”
“Where are you going, Guild Master?”
“I’m going to do some hunting. I’ll earn some money too and use it to increase our guild size.”
“Oh! Finally, an action that’s actually helpful…!! Thank you.”
“Don’t mention it.”
Getting praised feels nice, doesn’t it? Alright. I’ll go hunt like crazy and bring back a ton of money.
I arrived at the hunting grounds and hunted for about an hour. I earned about five million won per hour. It felt decent, but also not quite… At times like this, I glanced at the chat.
“Ah… Did I stop talking again?”
It wasn’t the chat that had dropped—it was my viewer count… halved to 2,100. I want to fix it, but I can’t. I’m really trying hard, but it’s not working. Still, it’s amazing that 2,100 people are still here. You’re watching this? Thank you!! I’ll do my best.
“I-I’ll start talking now. It’s a curse RP where I can’t speak when I focus on the game. I’ll try my hardest to break it.”
Being aware of it does help a little. I’ll do my best.
“Fighting, fighting. Let’s do well. I earned five million won per hour… Are there any efficient hunting grounds?”
“It’s hard? The monsters? I’m not confident in my controls though… Hmm.”
“It’s controlled? Oof… Then I can’t go there.”
The monsters die in one hit so the respawn wait is long, but honestly this is just about weapon power. I’m not confident in my controls. I’ll definitely get pushed around. And I didn’t want to get caught up in any disputes. I’m having fun right now—why would I throw myself into a storm?
I’ll just keep hunting here. Ah… I’ll talk while I hunt. I’ll communicate. Ask me questions.
Don’t overthink it, Seon-a. Just answer questions and communicate. Don’t think of it as a game—think of it as a chat stream. There’s no streamer who can’t do chat streams. Everyone’s good at chat streams. I’m good at them too. Yeah. This isn’t a game. It’s a chat stream.
“Ask me questions~!”
I slowly read the questions.
“Please spread the red pill. Can I? It was so bold it was amazing. I almost forgot to mention it. You’ve got talent.”
I read the chat diligently while hunting. If I drop an item, the chat goes wild.
“No, I only said it because I saw it in chat. I’ll eat it well. Next question… How long are you going to do this boring hunting? Ah~ Until I fill 80 members. Did that answer it? Let me read the next one. SX is boring. Next… Manager, please ban this person. What are you doing while eating a hamburger? Are you just going to leave that kind of insult?”
“Ah… I see. Understood. Please ban them quickly. Let me read the next one. What’s my goal… Yeah. I’ll just do it moderately and wrap it up.”
Thinking of it as a chat stream made it easier. Yeah… Don’t try to fill the broadcast with game content—just chat. Just chat. This is so much more comfortable.
“What would you do if you won the lottery? What kind of question is that? You’re really asking brainless questions…? Hmm… Lottery… How much would you give me if I won? Have I ever bought a lottery ticket? If I spend 5,000 won on the game, it’s instantly fun… I’m the type who only chases immediate fun right in front of me… I haven’t really thought about the future.”
Not buying lottery tickets makes you a gold spoon? These people were just accusing me of scripting earlier, and now they’re calling me a gold spoon for not buying lottery tickets? If I were a little smarter, I could refute them… but with my current self, I can’t think of a counterargument. It’s truly lamentable.
“Anyway… it’s way exaggerated. I’m not like that. My family is super frugal. What do you mean ‘suddenly went to academy’? I’ve gone to academies too. Academies, private tutoring… I’ve tried them all, but people who can’t do it just can’t.”
“You guys too? That’s a relief.”
After doing three hours of chat disguised as hunting, I ended the stream.
I did really well today. I held the 1,000 line!! If I keep this up, tomorrow’s going to be exciting too!! Maybe, at this rate… Ehehe. Are you scared of Seon-a’s growth, you big shots? Like, scared of Seon-a’s terrifying growth as she absorbs casual viewers and settles as a mid-tier streamer? Mwahahaha!! What a delightful day for delusions.