Suyangjang's Irregular -2
"Ha, a test? I thought for sure they'd shut down the academy right then and there."
"You bet. Still, it was pretty clever. A fine book, really."
"Jupyeong, what'd you say to weasel your way out?"
"Me? I took a shit right on the desk."
"What... You actually did that?"
"Then I asked the master, 'I don't see why I shouldn't shit on the desk—could you explain it to me, teacher?'"
"And then what happened?"
"He lectured me on propriety and the rites. I pretended not to get it and dropped my pants again. He finally said, 'That's enough—get out.' And so I did."
Seokdo and Choi Jupyeong.
The two of them were swapping war stories with me stuck in the middle, like old soldiers reminiscing about battles.
Choi Jupyeong thought Liu Bei had mistaken me for Kongming.
"So how'd you get out?"
"It's been so long, the details are fuzzy, but I just wouldn't stop trying to persuade the master."
"What'd you say?"
"I told him my time here was wasted. 'Even my time for reading precious texts is short—why make me listen to this? Sitting here like this is just wasting both your time and mine. It's like when Song Yi ignored Mok Yi's warning and failed to block Cao Cao's river crossing—he lost his life for it. This is the same thing.'"
"And?"
"He opened the door for me. That's how I left... Ha."
As their conversation dragged on, a man approached with dignified, measured steps.
"What delightful gossip are you sharing? Is it about that scream?"
"Gongwi's here. You know him, right? This guy's Maenggeon, goes by Gongwi. Kinda rigid, but sharp as a tack."
"Jupyeong! Keep talking like that, and you'll lose your head one day!"
"Yes, sir. I'll watch myself."
Seokdo, inwardly curious, approached Maenggeon.
"Maenggeon, how'd you get out?"
"Huh? Oh, that? Pretty clever answer, wasn't it? Never imagined a girl like you in the Suyangjang."
I bowed my head politely.
"I'm Chen Soyoung."
"How does a woman aspire to scholarship?"
"My father said sons are heaven and daughters are earth, so he told me to be solid ground and become a woman like Ban Hui."
"Wise words. Who's your father?"
"His courtesy name is Kongming, given name Liang—Zhuge Liang."
"I see. Well then... Ahem."
The three of them exchanged glances.
Seokdo broke the silence.
"So, Maenggeon, how'd you escape?"
"What? Oh, the questioning?"
"We were just talking about it. Jupyeong and I already shared ours, so now we're curious about you."
"I didn't hear yours? That's unfair! Why make me spill while keeping yours secret?"
Choi Jupyeong beckoned me over.
"Hey, that makes me the most hard done by."
Seokdo nodded in silent agreement.
Maenggeon set down his stack of letters and looked at me.
"What do you think, miss?"
"Not that curious, honestly."
"...Pardon?"
Pfft.
The two behind him stifled laughs, and Maenggeon's face turned red.
Oh no... They're treating me so casually, my words just slipped out too lightly. I forced a bright smile, lifting the corners of my mouth.
"Ah... Got it. Wow! I'm dying to know. What's your name again? You must've given such an eloquent speech—I'm so curious I won't sleep tonight!"
Annoyed by the ongoing snickers, Maenggeon raised his voice.
"Hah... Since you're so eager, I suppose I can't refuse."
"No, it's fine! If it's awkward, you don't have to say!"
I waved it off considerately, and his forehead flushed too.
Choi Jupyeong jumped in to defuse.
"You're killing the guy. Just like Kongming's daughter—baiting him out of nowhere. Soyoung, I called Maenggeon rigid, right? Dude, you're totally hooked."
"Is this some hazing ritual? Sigh... But why haze me?"
"Nah, what's the point of enforcing discipline? Hey, you're Kongming's kid. We know your game—that's why we're saying it. Teasing's over; spill it."
Maenggeon glared at Choi Jupyeong once, then began.
"I just stared at the master silently. Not sure how much time passed, but when he fidgeted, I said, 'Will you persuade me now?' He kicked open the door and stormed out."
"Then?"
"No idea how long later, he came back. I asked again, 'Will you persuade me now?' He said, 'That's enough—get out.'"
"Lame."
"When I left, three days had passed. Thirsty as hell, so I drank some water first."
"Tough bastard. Soyoung, this guy's a masochist. Stay away."
Maenggeon said it so matter-of-factly, but wasn't that impressive?
Respect, Uncle Maenggeon.
"Impressive. You sat there three days?"
"On my knees. My knee prints are probably still in the master's room—didn't you see?"
"As a girl, I can only imagine it. I couldn't do it myself. Your unyielding spirit really touches me."
"Is that so? I'm glad you understand."
I hyped him up, and Maenggeon couldn't hide his joy—his face lit up.
"See? Definitely Kongming's daughter! Why the long faces, you two?!"
"Um... Sorry, but could you do it just once?"
Pfft.
The two stifled laughs again, and Maenggeon's face reddened once more.
"I got carried away."
"No, it was still a bold, cool answer, Maenggeon."
Maenggeon shyly picked up his letters and left.
Tsundere.
Seokdo noticed my empty teacup and poured me more.
"Anyway, Soyoung, I've been meaning to ask—what's Kongming up to these days?"
"Who knows. Living like a bum. Honestly, I can't keep track. Even when people visit, he just naps with them and spouts old sayings at the dinner table till you choke on your food. He's just eating and loafing—worried he'll get fat."
Seokdo asked worriedly.
"You two fighting? Doesn't sound harmonious."
"Nah, fighting's just daily life. He gives in when I whine, so we're good, right?"
"A love-hate thing. Yeah, sounds like Kongming."
Seokdo nodded, and Choi Jupyeong chimed in.
"So, Soyoung, how old are you?"
"Nine this year."
Choi Jupyeong counted on his fingers after hearing that.
"Damn, fast progress. No wonder, with Lady Yueying visiting nonstop... Ahem."
"Kongming matured early. Fifteen? Fourteen? When'd he... you know."
"Stop!!! That's enough! It's rude!"
Whatever, let imaginations run wild. No plans to explain.
Choi Jupyeong propped his head on his hand and sprawled on the floor.
"Anyway, you're a girl—what're you gonna do? Study classics? Want some Han poetry?"
"Nah, just a nap. Wake me around four? That's when I head back."
"Acting all entitled. Want a blanket?"
I can just nap here? Lady Huang scared me with all that 'who knows what'll eat you' and 'be careful' talk.
But it's weird, right? Saying 'nap time' and they just go 'okay' so readily.
"I'll grab a blanket."
Choi Jupyeong left.
"Soyoung? Feel free to do as you like, but there are proprieties. We can't read Kongming's mind, but even when he acted so irreverently, no one complained because of his profound insight."
"He said I didn't have to do anything."
"'Master Kongming'? You're already studying under him, I see. Then I won't prejudge. The Dragon of the Realm himself stayed up nights reading classics here for years at first—I assumed you'd do the same out of concern. But forcing my view is rude. I won't impose."
Gentleman. Just a total gentleman.
"Thanks. But hearing that, I'm a bit scared, honestly. Even if I read the classics, I think it'd be pointless."
"Why's that?"
"'Cause I'm a woman. Truth is, I came mostly 'cause I couldn't say no to Master Kongming. I agree wisdom's in Confucius-says and Mencius-says. But I can't fully absorb it as my own. The world's full of variables, situations that contradict the sages will happen endlessly, so I think the old stuff's outdated."
It's already happened. Situations contradicting the sages.
To me, Uncle Seokdo's a sage from the past too.
So the classics didn't really click.
"I disagree. Roots let you weather those storms. The classics aren't outdated! How can you say that? Without reason, you'd be swept away! Why reject the foundation? I can't ignore your words!"
Seokdo raised his voice, and I realized my mistake.
Too casual, got too relaxed.
"I misspoke."
"That's not the issue. I need to hear your true intent clearly."
Huh? Didn't you say no imposing opinions?
"Um, Uncle Seokdo?"
"Sit!"
These types are scariest when mad.
Should I apologize?