The Mountain Lord
Working at the cafeteria was definitely not a bad choice. It solved my meals. And they even gave me a modest sum of money every month. Of course, there was always the option of leeching off Hyeji or Jung Ayeon like a parasite, but... 'The readers would send 5700 characters calling the protagonist a total piece of trash.'
[Thou art a fool indeed. These days, however, it is 7800 characters, I say.]
'Ah, right. Longer than the actual chapter.'
I decided to exclude Elsia. If I teamed up with her, instead of getting fed, I might end up chewing on tree bark or grass roots. I couldn't handle that. Still, I didn't like the fact that during peak hours—lunch and dinner—I had to join in and help out. In other words, by the time the rush ended, I'd have to wolf down my food and rush off to class. And it didn't stop at just being hungry. Shouts echoing from the kitchen. Irritated voices. Grumbling complaints. All of it combined to amplify my frustration. Listening to endless demands and whining in the middle of it all, my patience started wearing thin. But I had to endure. Especially at times like this, I had to endure even more.
'How the hell is this a frustrating slow-burn plot? If I don't work, I don't even get to eat sweet potatoes.'
[Fortunately, this place gives milk along with the sweet potatoes, does it not?]
While carrying side dishes, I suddenly heard what sounded like snoring coming from behind the cafeteria. Curious, I went to check, and there stood a massive gathering of beasts. Wild boars, snakes, mountain goats, eagles, raccoons, water deer—every kind of animal imaginable. They weren't wary of each other at all. Instead, they were all staring straight at me.
'......So this is the front line, huh.'
[They seem to have eaten well. Why do they all look so plump?]
Behind the cafeteria stood several large mountains. The Academy had left them untouched under the pretext of preserving the natural environment, but in reality, it was just to receive tax benefits by claiming environmental protection. When nature is preserved, residents naturally appear. So whenever food waste was dumped into the prepared troughs, the mountain creatures would come and dispose of it in an eco-friendly manner.
Since guests had arrived, I poured all the accumulated food waste into the troughs. The impatient beasts immediately buried their snouts in the food the moment it was served and began devouring it.
[They live more luxuriously than thou.]
'I haven't even eaten yet.'
Among them, the largest and most ferocious-looking wild boar suddenly lifted its head. It was enormous, comparable to the unicorns I'd seen before. The boar, which seemed to be the leader of the wild beasts, abruptly tossed two meatballs toward me and let out a low growl. Then it began aggressively scraping the ground with its front legs, as if it had a serious complaint.
[What is it saying?]
'......It says the rating is 2 points? Too bland, apparently.'
At that, the other beasts that had been eating well also lifted their heads one by one and began barking out their own cries. They were piling on complaints, riding on their leader's opinion.
"Hey, you damn animals. I'm just a delivery guy, not a chef!"
But the moment I spoke, an even more intense reaction erupted. They complained that the seasoning needed adjusting. That I only fed them delicious food. When would they get special meals? Meanwhile, the trough had already been licked completely clean, not a single scrap left behind.
[They're complaining about the taste after eating everything?]
'My bad. I should've salted it heavily and cured the whole lot.'
It was summer, after all. Both the kitchen and outside were sweltering. Thanks to that, sweat was pouring down my entire body. My irritation levels were climbing at a steep angle in proportion.
At that moment, the leader suddenly stood up while squealing. As its massive body rose upright on the ground, it completely filled my vision. 'Shit, I thought it was a disaster god, but it was Stalin all along.'
[How dare a mere pig harbor revolutionary ambitions.]
'Bugs that can't even regress dare to crawl up?'
The leader then dropped back onto all fours, exhaled roughly, and charged straight at me. It was clearly trying to make an example of the human who refused to accommodate its demands. Its eyes were filled with madness, and its enormous body kept accelerating. That massive mass combined with speed was a deadly weapon in itself. However—
[Go forth! The mad dog of this territory is thou!]
'I'm fucked, you bastard.'
The opponent was far too unfavorable. Because the one facing the leader was me.
"The red of revolution you're lacking shall be filled with your own blood!"
The moment I saw the leader charge, I switched from a two-legged stance to all fours. Instead of dodging, I charged straight forward and slammed my head directly into the boar's.
- CRAAAAAASH!!!!!!
"Krrrrrrrk."
Two solid heads collided with a thunderous impact. A cracking sound came from one of them. Naturally, it came from the leader's head. The overwhelming shock had shattered the boar's skull. With a final death rattle, the leader collapsed into a cold corpse.
Just then, one of the kitchen staff burst out after hearing the noise, irritation clearly written on their face.
"Kim! What the hell are you doing back there—"
But the irritation on the staff member's face vanished in an instant. It was replaced by shock and terror. Ignoring their dramatic change in expression, I tossed the dead boar's carcass into the kitchen. Then, growling at the beasts still frozen in shock from their leader's death, I snarled:
"Any beast that wants to prove its strength, step forward."
The beasts that had been causing trouble just moments ago began averting their gazes. They had instinctively sensed the danger. Confirming that none of them dared to approach anymore, I gave them an order.
"Kneel."
Feeling the overwhelming difference in power, every single beast lowered its head to the ground one by one. It was a sight that even Noah, who built a great ark to carry the animals, could never have imagined. I spoke clearly to the beasts bowing their heads before me.
"From now on, I shall stand in the heavens."
That day, the disaster god disappeared. In its place, the Mountain Lord was born.
***
I asked the kitchen staff to butcher the wild boar I'd thrown inside earlier. They tried to complain at first but gave up and gathered their tools. In a way, it was only natural. 'Who would argue with a lunatic who headbutts a boar to death with pure skull power?'
[Now there will be fewer staff members in the kitchen who dare ignore thee.]
Some of them were even smiling and praising me. Their reason was that I'd punished the beasts for getting cocky without knowing their place. They said they used to feed them out of pity, but lately the animals had become picky eaters. In the end, several kitchen staff gathered without complaint and began butchering the leader. Some wore cheerful expressions, while others had eyes filled with fear. Piece, who overheard their muttering, spoke to me.
[My dear? They say that boar belonged to the Academy President.]
'Tell him to come. My account's frozen and I'm pissed off, so this is perfect timing.'
[What will thou do if he actually comes?]
'I hope he brings lots of cash. I'll make him pay in cash every time he shows up.'
Even Trainer Kang Hyungwook said there are no bad dogs in this world. In the end, that boar died because its owner was an idiot and it got too full of itself. 'We usually call that natural causes.'
[Indeed. I wonder how much meat we will receive later.]
Lunchtime was almost over. I needed to eat quickly, but the kitchen staff besides the butchers still looked busy. So I went to the supervisor, who didn't seem too occupied, and started demanding my food.
"Where's my lunch? Give me food. I have to go to class now."
"Ah, just eat whatever. It's over there."
The supervisor pointed to a single plate piled high with rice mixed with various meats and fish. [......Is that not just dog food?]
'Fuck, where did my human rights go?'
Still, as I ate, I realized the balance was surprisingly delicious. The meat that melted in my mouth the moment it touched my tongue. The fish grilled to a perfect golden brown. The vegetables that proudly asserted their presence with their crisp texture in between. And the pill mixed into the rice made me feel like I was taking a nutritional supplement, like my body was getting healthier.
'Sob. It was delicious, today's meal.'
[There is not much time left. We must wrap this up soon.]
Since class was about to start, I ate as fast as I could and ran to the classroom. Right after I left, one of the staff members came huffing and puffing while carrying a massive steak.
"Shinu! Sorry I'm late! Hurry up and eat lunch! Huh? Where'd he go?"
The staff member had been looking for me, but I had already been gone for a long time. In the end, unable to find me, the staff member returned with a sulky expression. And the only thing left behind was a single yellow dog, shedding tears upon discovering its food bowl was empty.