[The Weight of the Future]
Immediately after my conversation with Adam, I wandered through the village in silence.
The festive atmosphere was still in full swing. The members who had spent the last two weeks away meeting clients with the captain were fueling the energy of the crowd. They were dancing, clowning around, shouting, and singing at the top of their lungs.
Even aside from them, the village’s adorable children and the wives of the mercenaries were gathered in small groups, their laughter blooming like flowers. On top of that, word must have spread about Adam’s call for drinks and meat, as drinking parties were breaking out everywhere. The familiar, boisterous spirit of the Red Flame Mercenary Corps permeated the air. Everyone was enjoying the present as if there were no tomorrow, and a warm, affectionate atmosphere clung to the village.
"We have to look at the future after the war, Berg. That’s the only way to keep the mercenary corps—and the families of our men—safe."
I chewed over Adam’s words. The more the festive mood continued, the deeper his message sank into my heart. Oblivious to my internal turmoil, a young girl came running up and latched onto my leg.
"Freeze!"
The child clinging to my leg wasn't even looking at me. All her focus was on another boy chasing her. She shouted with an excited voice:
"I’m touching Berg’s leg, so I’m frozen!"
"Hey! That’s cheating!"
The children were innocently lost in their game. The girl stuck to my leg giggled, seemingly delighted by something. Her parents, startled by her behavior, came running out.
"Melissa! Get off Vice-Captain Berg’s leg!"
"...Huh? Why...?"
The girl’s expression turned sullen in an instant. She looked up at me with a tearful face. I patted her head and said, "It’s alright."
At those words, her darkened expression brightened again. With a radiant smile, she looked at her parents and shouted:
"Berg said it’s okay!"
"Melissa!"
I looked at the child’s parents—a mercenary who looked older than me. "It’s fine. They’re just children."
I reassured him. I had no desire to ruin the festive mood. As I caused that small stir, people here and there began to notice my presence.
"Vice-Captain!"
"Vice-Captain! Wasn't the training a bit too much yesterday? Heh heh."
"Vice-Captain! Come over and have a drink!"
I waved my hand slightly to decline their offers. There was one place I wanted to visit right now. I tapped the forehead of the girl still clinging to my leg and said, "Alright, you're unfrozen."
The girl shivered, tilted her head back in surprise, then let go of my leg and started running away again. The boy followed her, darting off. I watched their backs for a moment. For some reason, it was a day where someone from my past kept overlapping with the present.
"Vice-Captain."
As I walked, someone jogged up to my side. It was Baran, my aide. Judging by his flushed cheeks, he had been drinking. His lips were glistening with grease. Even so, he was clearly trying to hide his intoxication. Looking over his shoulder, I saw a woman watching Baran and me intently.
"A lover?" I asked quietly. Baran looked back, then replied, "Yes."
"Do you change lovers every time? When did you bring this one in?"
"I brought her from the last expedition. I’m serious about this one."
I chuckled. "You’ve got talent."
Baran laughed along with me. "You’re the one with more talent, Vice-Captain. You’re handsome, you’re successful..."
"Flattery will get you nowhere."
"Heh heh. So, Vice-Captain, don't you have anyone?"
In the softer atmosphere, different from the daytime, Baran asked a personal question. I neither affirmed nor denied his words. It was likely because Adam’s proposal was still lingering in my mind. I felt as though I was prepared to take a new step away from the past, but my body felt as if it wouldn't move.
I changed the subject. "Baran."
"Yes, Vice-Captain."
"...I’m sorry about earlier today."
There was no denying that I had been pushing the training a bit too hard lately. Adam said I was becoming so sharp because I lacked a partner, and stories I had once dismissed as jokes now felt uncomfortably realistic.
Baran smiled at my apology. "...It’s alright, Vice-Captain. I understand you’re only doing it because you’re worried about the members."
"...Go and play with your lover. Stop following me."
"Yes. See you later."
Baran turned around immediately at my words. Once he left, I was swept up in unnecessary thoughts. It was a strange sensation, as if I were the only one without a partner. Once upon a time, I had someone on my side who was closer than anyone else.
Seven years had passed, so there weren't many days where I thought of Sien. But the empty space she had left in my heart remained unfilled. Knowing what it felt like to have someone on my side, I felt that thirst just as keenly. It wasn't that this loneliness was unbearable; I had simply been enduring it.
"...Hah."
I let out a sigh. My worries were deepening. The fact that I hadn't rejected Adam’s proposal outright was proof that a change was happening within me.
I stopped by the village orphanage. Many children shouted at my appearance.
"Berg!"
"It’s Berg!"
A swarm of children came running toward me. They were all tearing into fragrant meat. Fortunately, the food was being distributed evenly everywhere. I patted the heads of the children gathered around me one by one. These were the children of the mercenaries who had fallen in battle. When a member died and even the mother ran away, we were the ones who took care of the children left behind.
A young nun walked out with quick steps, following the children. "V-Vice-Captain Berg. You’ve come again."
It was Julia, the nun of the orphanage who served the God of Purity. "Everything alright?"
At my question, Julia nodded. She couldn't even meet my eyes, staring instead at the floor. The mischievous children watching the scene tattled on her.
"Sister Julia was waiting for Berg...?"
"Paul!"
*Thwack!*
Sister Julia flicked Paul on the forehead. I chuckled. Julia became restless at my laughter and retreated inside as if fleeing. "V-Vice-Captain Berg. If you’re here to eat, please join us..."
She even offered me a meal with her back turned. I knew it. I knew she had feelings for me. But because my heart couldn't respond, I had always pretended not to notice. This time, too, I declined the offer to avoid giving her false hope.
"Sorry. I came because I had some business to attend to. Paul, come here."
"...Me?"
Paul, who had been dragged away by Julia while clutching his head, ran out in front of me.
"I heard it was your birthday yesterday. It’s late, but here’s a gift."
I handed Paul a pair of tough leather gloves. Paul took the gift and stared at the gloves with sparkling eyes.
"W-wow!"
He jumped up and down, delighted with the gift. Other children gathered around Paul as he held them. I watched that heartwarming scene for a moment. In truth, I felt sorry that this was all I could do for him. Paul’s father had been my subordinate. He had died in action while serving in my lead squad.
It wasn't that I took care of them because I particularly loved children; it was the minimum courtesy I owed to the comrades who had given their lives and left.
Once again, Adam’s words seemed to echo in my ears.
"We have to look at the future after the war, Berg. That’s the only way to keep the mercenary corps—and the families of our men—safe."
Let’s say the Red Flame Mercenary Corps collapsed. Since the members were still healthy, they would be able to find their own way. It would be difficult, but they could manage to put food on the table somehow. They would support their families somehow. But what about these orphans?
If these children left Stakpin, they would have to live in a nearby city. There was no guarantee they would even get into an orphanage. If that happened, some would experience life in the slums like I did. They would have to steal, get beaten, fight, and survive in that dark atmosphere. Even thinking about it for a moment, it was wrong. That wasn't what I had promised the dying members.
My reason kept telling me which choice was right. But a hesitation I couldn't understand kept holding me back.
"Berg! Thank you!"
Just then, Paul came over and hugged me. "..."
In that small warmth, my deep thoughts slowly began to peel away. I blinked and looked at the children in front of me. And then, I sighed. My heart felt light, as if the worries in my head had been washed away. I couldn't keep being stubborn like this forever.
Now that I had made my choice, I felt refreshed. I nodded at Paul. "Yeah."
When I returned to the center of the village, a large bonfire was blazing. People were gathered around it, dancing and singing. Everyone held drinks and meat in their hands, and laughter was abundant. The feast was burning brightly.
I saw Adam standing at the center. He was drinking and laughing with his arms around the other members. As I watched him like that for a moment, Adam noticed my presence. We shared a look from a distance.
"..."
"..."
In the end, I gave a small nod. Adam slowly wore a benevolent smile and nodded back at me.