Confession - 2
Ha Hyun-do was more skilled than I had expected. The sheer power with which he swung the axes in his hands to split goblin skulls in two with a single strike. At first glance, the situation seemed to be in our favor. After all, every time he swung those axes, the goblins died spewing fountains of blood.
But there were simply too many of them. More than anything, I was the burden. He had forced an antidote down my throat after I collapsed, yet its effects still had not appeared. If he had been alone, he could have swept the goblins aside and escaped with ease. The goblins were not complete fools, either. They noticed how he moved to protect me and began charging at me instead. The pattern repeated: he would swing his axes, then rush back to my side. We had to avoid this war of attrition.
“Tsk, this isn’t working. There are too many of them,” he muttered while guarding me.
“......”
He could have abandoned me and sought his own survival, but Ha Hyun-do refused to do so. Goblins fell with every move he made, yet their numbers only seemed to swell. I wanted to tell him to leave me and run, but my mouth would not obey.
Keeping watch on the creatures, he lifted me into his arms. He carried me on his back, threatening them with his axes as he sprinted into the fog. It was the first time I had ever been held by a man, and his embrace was so large and warm that I unknowingly drifted into unconsciousness.
How much time passed after that, I cannot say. The creatures pursued us relentlessly. The cycle repeated: he would hide me and head out alone to intercept them.
On the first day, the wounds on Ha Hyun-do’s body multiplied. His Rigid Body ability was not particularly high in rank. He returned each time bearing fresh injuries from the goblins’ unexpected counterattacks.
On the second day, he did not sleep at all. His axe had already snapped at the handle and become useless. The goblins attacked without regard for day or night, so we had to remain ready to flee at any moment. No matter how strong an Awakened might be, the body could not endure without rest.
By evening I had recovered enough to speak.
“Thank you for saving me. But please leave me behind.”
The words spilled out the moment I confirmed my voice worked. A warning that if he continued to protect me instead of abandoning me, he would soon die.
Ha Hyun-do scratched the back of his head. “I won’t.”
“What?”
“I said no. We’re getting out of here alive. Don’t talk about leaving you behind.”
“......”
He was a stubborn man.
On the third day the fog lifted. It seemed other Hunters had cleared the gimmick inside the gate. We had taken shelter beneath the massive roots of a tree while fleeing.
It was the first time I had ever been pressed so close to a man. Ha Hyun-do’s body carried the thick scent of a male who had fought for days to protect me. The solid, packed muscle felt completely different from a woman’s softness. Something inside my chest fluttered.
“Your name.”
“Sorry?”
“We don’t even know each other’s names.”
“Now that you mention it… I’m Ha Hyun-do.”
“I’m Lee Ji-ah. Thank you for helping me.”
“It was the right thing to do.”
He laughed awkwardly.
“My body has recovered enough. Let’s get out of here.”
It was not perfect, but I was fit enough to fight. With a reliable vanguard like Ha Hyun-do, I could slaughter the creatures safely from the rear. He was different from the others I had worked with. A front-line tanker who skillfully and reliably protected his backline. That was Ha Hyun-do. If only his special ability had been even slightly stronger, he would have drawn attention immediately.
Those three long days finally ended. I escaped the gate in perfect sync with him.
When we emerged, a huge crowd had gathered outside. They demanded to know what had happened inside and why so many Hunters had failed to return. I forced a smile for the people asserting their right to information while searching for Ha Hyun-do, but he had already vanished.
Our reunion was almost comically simple. I asked the Hunter Association for his contact information and received it without difficulty. The receptionist looked skeptical when I explained he was my savior, but I did not mind. It felt like we now shared a small secret.
After that, we met often and grew closer. We formed parties and entered gates together. Sometimes we went on ordinary dates like normal people. Having survived a crisis side by side, it did not take us long to become intimate.
Soon we promised each other a future. We did not hold a wedding, however. We were both still working in a dangerous profession, and starting a family would require more preparation.
The night he proposed, we exchanged simple rings and spent the evening together. It was an ecstatic experience. I had never known a man. When his hard, masculine body—so different from a woman’s—pressed into me, lightning-like pleasure surged through every nerve.
Each time we whispered our love, we learned each other’s preferences. Sharing that love with him brought a happiness I thought could never be surpassed.
It was then, after making love with me, that Hyun-do awakened his second special ability. We celebrated together, sharing our joy.
I believed this happy life would continue forever. The first life had ended in a miserable death beneath a dump truck, but the second would be different. That was what I told myself.
I was a fool. Fate was not cruel only to me.
The day we were on a date at the festival held at Jangwon University, a gate tore open in the sky above the campus. Its scale was entirely different from the Mid-Rank gate Hyun-do and I had escaped before.
A gate’s danger level is determined by its internal saturation. Monsters soon began pouring from the one above the university. Ultra-high risk. The phenomenon of monsters bursting from a gate. The monster parade that had caused countless tragedies during the Great Awakening had begun.
Because the festival had drawn so many people, countless lives were lost. The Hunters on site—including myself and Hyun-do—had to buy time for the civilians to evacuate.
The delay seemed successful. Other Hunters entered the gate overhead, and the flood of monsters gradually lessened.
We breathed in relief. We thought we would be safe now. We thought it was fortunate that neither of us was hurt. The moment we embraced and let our guard down, a black blade pierced us both.
It did not take long for blood to rise in our throats. The attacker mechanically withdrew the sword and began slaughtering the remaining Hunters.
Hyun-do did not move. A fist-sized hole had been punched through the center of his chest. Where his heart should have been there was nothing, only severed arteries pouring blood.
It was instant death. Perhaps because he had shielded me, I suffered only a penetrating wound to the lungs.
I laid him gently on the ground and closed his wide, staring eyes. Then I unleashed the burning rage that boiled inside my chest. I needed a target for this dark emotion.
I used every ability I possessed to challenge the figure in the black robe. Golden patterns adorned its sleeves. The creature was experienced in battle, but the fight did not last long. I managed to seize its sword and carved its body until it looked exactly like Hyun-do had.
When I dragged my exhausted body back to him, other Hunters were already recovering his corpse. And I, who had stabbed to death the black-robed monster that slaughtered the Hunters, was hailed as a hero.
Hyun-do’s funeral was quiet. His parents and younger sister stood watch, along with the woman who said she had grown up like a sibling to him.
I begged his parents for forgiveness. I told them it was my fault for failing to protect him even though I had been right beside him. They refused to accept my apology. They said a young woman like me bore no blame, that the only one at fault was the monster who killed him. Instead they patted my shoulder and thanked me for avenging their son.
When the funeral ended and I returned to the small house where we had lived together, I broke down. Every corner of our home was filled with memories of Hyun-do and me. Each recollection sent a violent torrent of emotion crashing over me.
A life without him held no meaning anymore.
“Wait for me. I’m coming to you now.”
I hanged myself inside the home we had shared.
In the third loop that followed, Ha Hyun-do died in my place.
In the fourth loop, he died to an Elf we encountered inside a gate.
In the fifth, he died trying to save his family.
Sixth, seventh, eighth. No matter how many times I repeated the cycle, I could not save him. It was as if the world itself had decided to kill him. No matter how hard I tried to clear the path, fate always stole his life away.
As the loops accumulated, I finally learned the nature of Ha Hyun-do’s special ability. An ability even I had not known, because we had been each other’s first love and first opposite sex. He awakened a new special ability every time he had sex with a different woman.
In the second loop, after he slept with me, his abilities increased. In the fifth loop, after he slept with Yoon Seo-yeon, he gained another.
In a loop whose number I no longer remember, I deliberately pushed him into the arms of other women. My heart burned to see the man I loved forced to have sex with someone else, but I convinced myself it was necessary.
“This time, I will make you happy.”
When I became certain of a way to sever his fated death, I killed myself without hesitation.