Showdown, Speedrun!
I ate and drank my fill.
Looking up at the sunlight pouring down from the sky, I grinned like an idiot.
Hmm. How do I look right now?
'I have to show them. Prove it here and now. What kind of woman I am. What I can do. Make it crystal clear to everyone!'
Showing and proving. It had become second nature to me.
Maybe I was born just to prove something.
Clip-clop, clip-clop.
I watched the donkey-drawn cart for a moment before glancing around. Right now I was heading toward the canyon with the rest of the family members. Of course, Mirinda was among them, glaring daggers at me.
"You'll die a cursed death, you crazy bitch. You think you'll get away with what you did to my son?"
"Why don't you focus on popping out more brats while you still can, grandma? Looks like you've lost the strength for even that. Pathetic."
I kept my voice low and fired back. Mirinda immediately started trembling with rage.
"You filthy murderer! You call yourself human? What did that child ever do to deserve this?!"
I ignored her and kept walking. It was the same pathetic excuse I had seen far too often from real-life abusers. Rape a defenseless girl and then whine, "My son would never do that." After seeing it so many times, even Mirinda's face no longer moved me.
We arrived at the canyon.
Lush forest, clear blue sky, a dried-up riverbed that had once carried water, and scattered streams stretching endlessly into the distance. Seeing it in person felt far more overwhelming than any description in a novel. It was majestic enough to make me want to sit and paint it for the rest of my life.
Standing beside Hollan, the elderly referee who had overseen our previous duel stepped forward.
"All prospective heirs taking the Wednesday test, choose your basic armaments!"
Soldiers quickly brought out weapon racks. Falchions, claymores, lances, battle axes—every kind of weapon imaginable was on display.
Hollan, however, simply clapped his hands as if he had come prepared. His servants immediately brought his gear forward.
I recognized every piece.
'The Demon Swordmaster's sword, armor, earring, greaves, belt… what a ridiculous set.'
It was the full equipment set that had given the protagonist trouble even after he had grown stronger in the middle of the original story. Hollan had inherited the entire thing from his father, Blaken.
A smirk escaped me. Yeah, with gear like that he could probably drag this out a little longer.
The old man turned to me.
"Well, you still have a chance."
"Nah, I'm good. I already had my maid bring my stuff."
I wasn't about to lose either. But I wasn't going to act arrogant about it. I cleared my throat a few times and let out a nasal call.
"Winz yaaaang!"
The family members' faces instantly soured. Only Viewzil, who had been busy flirting with the courtesans, looked different.
"Heh, what a slut."
Basement-dwelling loser.
When I called, Winz came running, her skirt fluttering.
"Lady Queen! I'm here."
Three adhesive bombs for traps, a well-crafted rapier, and a gaudy golden chainmail. That was everything.
Hollan clicked his tongue.
"You came here just to draw attention, didn't you? What do you think you're going to do with that junk? Go back to the brothel district, you washed-up whore."
"Keep tapping that calculator in your head. You're about to fall straight into hell."
The family members were already shaking their heads as if the outcome was decided.
"That delinquent bitch. Just die already."
"Let's feed her corpse to the dogs."
"I'm going to take a nap. We all know who's winning."
No one thought I could win. No one expected anything from me.
Which was exactly why this was going to be so much fun.
The old man pointed out our starting positions. Hollan and I each moved to our designated spots and waited for the signal.
Looking around, I could see the family members watching from a hill that overlooked both of us. They looked luxurious and utterly complacent.
Winz, who had followed me, reluctantly stepped back.
"Please… please come back safely…!"
"Don't worry. This run's all about the speedrun."
"Speed… run…?"
Did she think I had never played a Souls game before? This was the easy part.
Beep—! Pop!
A loud firework exploded right after. Colorful bursts painted the sky like the start of a festival.
"Bets are closed. Time to prove myself."
Huff—! Tat-tat-tat!
I sprinted with everything I had.
This run was a speedrun. So I was going to finish it as fast as possible. Shortest time, shortest route, maximum efficiency.
Instead of sticking to the well-trodden path, I leaped over moss-covered rocks and fallen logs.
Tat-tat-tat! Thud! Shhhk!
I vaulted over a log in my way, kicked a boulder aside to change direction, then kicked off a tree to clear another rock with ease.
My view opened up again. I could hear the family members shouting.
"Hollan, win!"
"Our future head is doing great! Go, go!"
"Your existence will bring glory to our house. You must win!"
"Don't lose to that rootless delinquent! Shine, Hollan!"
As I kicked off the ground to push forward, my eyes caught a thick patch of bushes. Something huge was crouched inside.
'There it is.'
A massive body the size of an orc, two meters tall with a muscular frame. It was as tough as an orc but lower in rank. At level 12, I could take it down without much trouble!
The wild Mighty Goblin hurled a net at me.
"Kreeeaaak!"
Whoosh—! Thud.
I dodged the net and the oversized goblin thrust a harpoon at me.
"Yeah, not happening."
I swung my gauntleted fist straight into its face. The Mighty Goblin's wrist holding the harpoon jerked violently.
Whoosh!
Its stance collapsed. I drove my rapier straight into its throat in one fluid motion.
Thud! Squelch.
I stabbed its eye, then its throat again, before yanking the rapier free and dashing past.
Points tasted sweet.
I cut straight across, grabbed a vine, and swung down.
'Normally I'd have to go up, but the shortcut's right here!'
Every item I had prepared had a reason. Even the chainmail that looked cumbersome and offered little defense was part of the plan.
I landed steadily and checked the time. Roughly three minutes had passed?
I touched down in a patch of tall grass. Ahead of me stood a door leading into an underground tunnel. Beside it, an old goblin was puffing on a pipe.
'That's the one. The game-changer who played a decisive role in helping the protagonist beat his rival in the original story!'
This was the reason I had been confident I could finish in ten minutes. That goblin right there.
I approached. The goblin narrowed its yellow eyes.
"You want to pass through here?"
"That's why I came."
"You don't look like you have anything to offer me."
"Oh, I do. This."
I stripped off the chainmail and shook it. The goblin tilted its head.
"What? It's gold?"
"Don't get too excited yet. I'm a Wednesday."
"I know. This is their territory. But what does that matter?"
"This is the pure gold chainmail passed down through our family for generations."
"…What? Don't make me laugh."
The goblin snorted as if I were spouting nonsense. But I was dead serious.
"Suit yourself. I'll just take another route. If I head west, that guy should be…"
I turned away, tucking the chainmail back under my arm.
Sorry, but I knew exactly how desperate this creature was. A parasite living off scraps in a place like this, smoking a pipe like some homeless bum!
"W-wait!"
The goblin finally grabbed me. I only turned my head.
"What?"
"You're the first human I've seen in three years. Will you come back?"
"No real reason to…?"
"Fine. I'll let you through for that."
"You won't regret it."
I handed over the chainmail. The goblin sighed once, then placed its palm on the door. It pressed a sequence like entering a passcode.
Click—! Creeeeak.
The door swung open as if by magic. I hadn't known the password, so bargaining with the goblin had been my only option.
I sprinted down the underground passage. In no time I burst out the other side—and what I saw made me grin.
Flutter, flutter!
The family flag fluttered alone atop a gentle hill.
That was the finish line. Pulling it out and waving it would end everything.
'That's the goal! Shortcuts really are the best.'
The normal route would take an ordinary person an entire day.
I had cleared this path in under ten minutes.
Grinning, I dashed forward—only for the ground to suddenly start shaking.
Thud. Thud.
I stopped and checked the time. Eight minutes so far? Two minutes left.
I scanned the terrain.
To the left, a tall hill blocked the view where the family was watching. To the right, trees swayed.
The footsteps came from the right.
Looking closely, I saw a dense cluster of trees where the sound was approaching. There was just enough space for a massive body to squeeze through.
'Of course it's there. Sorry, protagonist, but I'm claiming this one first.'
I licked my lips and moved into position. I planted the three adhesive bombs at intervals along the path.
Then I backed away. Finally, the giant revealed itself.
"GRAAAAAARGH!"
Long, wild black hair, a muscular frame, height well over three meters. It was a D-rank Giant.
The monster roared while ripping a tree out of the ground.
A D-rank monster needed at least level 30 to even stand a chance against it.
'If I tried to beat this thing head-on, I'd have to dump all my points into leveling up. Even then I'd take damage and waste time. But…'
No need for that. I snapped my fingers.
Crack!
"I am inevitable!"
Boom! Boom! BOOM! CRASH!
The ground beneath the giant's feet suddenly exploded, caving in halfway. The giant panicked, roaring as it stumbled around.
It wasn't dead, but its skin was torn open, raw red flesh visible everywhere. The adhesive bombs had done their job.
This was my chance to exploit its weakness. Killing it would give me useful materials for later!
"Hah!"
I stabbed wildly at the giant's ankles with my rapier.
Stab, stab, stab again.
Thud, thud-thud! Whoosh, whoosh, thud-thud-thud!
By the time the giant finally noticed me, its stance had already collapsed.
Time for the national combo?
Bam-bam-bam-bam-bam! Crack!
The giant could only scream under my frenzied barrage, unable to regain its senses.
Then the final blow.
Thud!
I drove the rapier straight into its forehead.
The giant collapsed with a thunderous crash. I looted everything useful and sent it into my ring before striding confidently to the flag. I yanked it free and waved it high.
Then I blew the horn beside it.
BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!
The family members, who had been staring only at Hollan, all whipped their heads toward me at once.
Every single face was frozen in shock.
But if they were this surprised already, they had no idea what was coming next.
'Alright, time to bring that out.'
The Wednesday test was over.
Watching the family members rush toward me, I smiled wickedly.