The Provincial Exam Failure Fabrication Team (3)

The Gu Clan of Agyang.

According to what Soso told me the next morning, they were the most prestigious family in all of Agyang. And Gu Un-sang was the eldest son of that house — a guest of the highest possible caliber. The moment the Cheonpung Merchant Group realized they had taken in a thoroughly drunk, unconscious Gu Un-sang, they scrambled to install him in the inner courtyard with all due haste.

"Master! He's a real catch, isn't he?"

Soso said this as I sat on the main hall's veranda.

"Seems so. I never expected him to be this big a deal."

"Thanks to him, we can finally relax. Nobody's going to suspect you now that you've brought someone like that home, right?"

"You never know. We can't let our guard down until the very end. By the way — is that for me?"

I nodded toward the teacup on the tray she was holding.

"Ah! You drank last night too, so I figured you'd have a hangover. Here, drink up."

At her urging I took a sip. A sweet, mellow taste lingered ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠on my tongue.

"Honey water?"

"The man you brought in woke up and was making some, so I asked for a cup myself. When I said it was for you, he made an extra one."

"Thanks."

"Don't mention it. But what are you planning to do from here? We never expected someone like him to show up."

"What else? We stick to the plan. Nothing's really changed, has it? If anything, this might work in our favor. If Gu Un-sang stays here, who's going to spare a thought for me?"

"True enough. ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠If he settles in, you'll just be some freeloader three times past his prime."

Smack!

"You little—!"

"Ow! That hurts!"

We were horsing around like that when a greeting drifted over from a distance.

"I was terribly rude the other night."

Gu Un-sang — the same man who had passed out dead drunk — had come looking for me.

"You're up?"

I rose from my seat, still nursing the honey water.

"Please, speak freely. Are you not my Hyeong-nim?"

Apparently he had not forgotten what he had said while drunk. He was still calling me Hyeong-nim.

"That was just the liquor talking, wasn't it?"

"Not at all. This younger brother was struck with awe by Hyeong-nim's vast learning the other night. And you are older than I am — how could I not call you Hyeong-nim?"

I had figured it was just drunken rambling, but Gu Un-sang seemed entirely sincere.

"Vast learning? I'm hardly that sort of man."

I do not believe modern people are smarter than those of the past. We ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠simply happen to know more facts. And I was neither a liberal-arts type nor a sciences type — I was an arts-and-PE guy. My knowledge is not that deep. I have just read a lot of books.

So I was not being modest for show. I meant every word.

But—

"Hyeong-nim! Does this Gu Un-sang know how deeply your words moved him that night? That the Yellow Turban Rebellion was the people's fear and hatred bursting outward — those words!"

At that, I tried to recall what I had actually said. I had been a little tipsy myself, so the details were fuzzy.

But that line...

It sounded an awful lot like a famous quote from Hermann Hesse's Demian.

"Those words opened this younger brother's eyes anew. I had simply thought the rulers had been sucking the people dry through taxes — but Hyeong-nim saw it from an entirely different angle. How could I not be astonished?"

"Ahem..."

The more I thought about it, the more certain I became that I had borrowed a line from Demian. The secondhand embarrassment made me clear my throat unbidden.

"And so, from this day forward, this younger brother shall call you Hyeong-nim."

Judging by appearances, Gu Un-sang came from a rather fine family. Being called his Hyeong-nim left me feeling awkward — was I even allowed to accept that?

Then, from behind him, Soso started gesturing frantically, mouthing words without sound. Judging by the look of it, she was saying something like: What are you doing? Just accept it already.

"Ahem. Very well. From now on, I'll call you Un-sang freely."

"This younger brother cannot express how glad he is to have met Hyeong-nim."

"You looked rough last night. Are you all right?"

"My stomach's still a bit unsettled, but the honey water this morning helped some."

"That's a relief. I was worried, carrying you all the way here yesterday."

Worried was putting it kindly. I had thought I was going to die of exhaustion. The Cheonpung Merchant Group sat in a busy district, so the distance was not that far — but hauling a full-grown man on your back the whole way was no small feat.

"Hyeong-nim, this appears to be the Cheonpung Merchant Group. What is your connection to them?"

"I have a slight connection, so I'm staying here for a while. Why do you ask?"

I asked carefully, wondering if he had some bad blood with the merchant group. If this S-rank tree harbored a grudge against them, he would not make much of a shelter for me.

"Don't people of merchant groups return to their own houses even after passing the civil service exams?"

"I'm not one of the merchant group's people, so don't worry about that."

"I'm relieved to hear Hyeong-nim is not of the merchant group. We nearly lost a great talent of the nation."

So no real hostility, then. But a great talent of the nation? He was overrating me by a mile.

"Ahem... Un-sang, where are you staying?"

With goodwill this high, planting the Gu Un-sang tree right here seemed viable. I asked casually.

"I'm lodging at Cheongwonbyolgok. Ah! While we're at it, why don't Hyeong-nim move there as well?"

He had stolen the initiative right out from under me.

I did not know exactly what Cheongwonbyolgok was, but the name alone screamed expensive room and board. With no income at present, my finances absolutely forbade it.

So I barked at him, determined not to set foot there.

"Nonsense! How can a scholar live in a place like that?"

"Pardon?"

"The common people worry over their daily meals. If a man who ought to serve the nation chases only fine food and silk bedding, how can he speak of the people's welfare?"

"Th-that is..."

"Of course, people may hold different views. But the moment men like us draw close to luxury, the people's lives grow harder. Remember that."

"Truly... words worthy of Hyeong-nim."

Gu Un-sang looked moved. Then his expression shifted, as if a question had just occurred to him.

"But then, isn't staying here the same thing? Merchant groups pursue profit by nature — they extract money from the common people, do they not?"

Bullseye. My mouth clamped shut for a second.

But if I froze here, the fish I had nearly landed would slip away.

"Ahem... that's different."

"Pardon?"

"I'm not spending any money here."

"..."

"I eat on the merchant group's coin and sleep in their rooms. In effect, ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠I'm whittling away at their wealth."

"..."

"And your thinking is fundamentally wrong! Why speak only of a merchant group's faults?"

"Pardon?"

"It's true they chase profit. But because they exist, goods circulate — grain can reach places that would otherwise starve."

"Ah..."

"Moving goods is itself vital work that upholds the nation."

"I had never thought of it that way."

"Of course, truly greedy merchants exist, as you say. But branding every merchant in the world as evil is equally foolish."

Perhaps because he already held me in such high regard, Gu Un-sang nodded deeply, thoroughly convinced.

"So, Un-sang — why don't you stay here as well?"

"Oh! I understand Hyeong-nim's meaning. You're saying we should both freeload off the merchant group's money!"

Gu Un-sang had somehow taken it in a completely wrong direction.

Four days had passed since Gu Un-sang took up residence at the merchant group. Thanks to him, no one there paid me any attention at all. In exchange, Gu Un-sang paid me rather too much attention, which occasionally became a nuisance — but still.

"Hyeong-nim, heading out again?"

"Just a small errand."

Every day I stopped by the bookstore, and every day the owner told me the same thing: the person who had taken Romance of the Three Kingdoms had not returned, so there was nothing he could say.

"Hah..."

I came back empty-handed and let out a sigh.

"Is something the matter?"

Gu Un-sang came over at once.

"No. Just something that isn't going the way I'd hoped."

At that, Gu Un-sang seemed to remember something. He went back to his room and returned with a book in hand.

"Have you by any chance read this? This younger brother has already read it sixteen times, marveling all the while."

In Gu Un-sang's hand was Romance of the Three Kingdoms.

"Th-this is...?"

Seeing the novel I had written appear out of nowhere in Gu Un-sang's grip, I stared at him with a face full of shock.

"So you know it. I thought a man of Hyeong-nim's caliber might well have read this book already."

Seeing me gape at the volume, Gu Un-sang assumed I had already finished it and spoke accordingly.

"Ahem. I read it a very long time ago. But you've read it as well? What did you think?"

If he learned I was the author, he might start saying only what he thought I wanted to hear — so for now I kept quiet and asked.

"The handwriting is a touch wanting, but the sentences live and breathe on the page, and never in my life have I seen a book that brings the stories of history to life so vividly. Without question, it is the finest book I have ever read. Only..."

"Only?"

Something in his tone sounded regretful, so I leaned in.

"I possess only the first volume... Looking at the ending, there is clearly a second, and that is a great pity. Does Hyeong-nim happen to have the second volume?"

"Regrettably, neither do I."

Of course I didn't. I was still writing it in my room whenever I had a spare moment.

"Is that so? Hah... I have been making inquiries myself, but it is hard to find. How a book like this went unknown for so long..."

Gu Un-sang sighed as he spoke.

"Come to think of it... the author of this book. The name is..."

"Ahem!"

At last I had been found out. The moment to speak had arrived, and my shoulders lifted of their own accord.

"Munhyuk... I envy you, Hyeong-nim — to share a name with a great scholar of this caliber."

"What??"

Gu Un-sang did not think I was the author at all. He simply believed we shared a name.

"The one who wrote this book may not be widely known, but he cannot be an ordinary man. He must be a person of extraordinary learning. Is it not an honor to share a name with such a figure?"

The very instant I was about to reveal myself as the author, Gu Un-sang thoroughly misunderstood the situation and launched into high praise of the "Munhyuk" who had written the book.

"Th-that's right."

And under the first genuine praise I had ever received in my life, my face burned so hot I could not bring myself to tell Gu Un-sang that I was the author.

Time passed, and the day came when the Hyangsi results were posted.

Gu Un-sang and I made our way to where the notices had been put up — and there we saw it.

Given how confident he had been, I had expected a good result — but first place? That I had not seen coming.

Startled myself, I turned to Gu Un-sang and offered my congratulations.

Yet even as he rejoiced, Gu Un-sang kept staring at the notice board as if he meant to bore a hole through it.

"Hyeong-nim, something is wrong."

"It says Haewon clear as day. What's wrong with that?"

"I cannot find Hyeong-nim's name. No matter how hard I look, it is not there. This cannot be. How could a man like Hyeong-nim..."

"Ahem... I must have fallen short. Nothing to be done about it."

Gu Un-sang, who ought to have been celebrating, could not bring himself to be happy because of me — and I felt a twinge of guilt for no good reason.

"Let's go."

We returned to the merchant group without another word.

Or rather — more precisely, Gu Un-sang was reading my mood, and so he said nothing.

Ordinarily I would have told him it was a fine day and he ought to be glad. But I could not. The final stage of the plan was already underway: the last act of the Hyangsi failure operation that Soso and I had cooked up together.

Once home, I went to my room without a word.

And I did not come out again — except for the day Gu Un-sang, having passed the Hyangsi, returned to his own house.

The reason was simple.

Anyone who failed the Hyangsi would be in considerable mental anguish. Such a person would surely shut himself away for a while. That was what Soso and I had figured — and that was exactly what we put into practice.

And by that performance, I became a failed scholar of the Hyangsi whom no one in the world would dispute.

"Done! Volume Two!"

And in the course of that seclusion, I finished it.

Volume Two of the Romance of the Three Kingdoms: The Chaos of the Ten Attendants.