Self-Destruction (13)
The faint, unidentifiable noise drifted through the dark house like someone panting for breath.
I stepped inside carefully, holding my breath as I strained to listen. …The second floor? A moment later, I realized the sound was coming from upstairs.
Worry overtook suspicion. Without hesitation, I headed for the stairs to the second floor. With each step, the sound grew louder. Haa… haa…
I unconsciously quickened my pace and hurried up. The dark second-floor hallway. A single streak of light pierced the pitch-black corridor—coming from Soyeon’s room.
I approached her door with caution. It was slightly ajar, as if someone had forgotten to close it all the way. I pressed my face to the narrow gap, holding my breath, and peered inside….
“…Haa… haa…”
A wave of humid heat washed over my face. There was Soyeon, sitting in front of the computer. Completely naked, she moved her hand in a steady rhythm, breathing hard.
[Hngh…! Haaang…!]
The lewd moans spilling from the computer speakers instantly explained both her current state and the mysterious sounds I had heard earlier.
…Huh?
The unexpected scene left me feeling strangely empty, but also relieved that my worries had been unfounded. This was far healthier than drinking or smoking. Even if Soyeon was still young, she was at that age. It was perfectly normal to have strong curiosity.
Of course, seeing my daughter—who had always seemed so small—behaving this way was a bit of a shock… but when I thought back to how I had become a father at the same age, I could understand.
Still. Getting so lost in the act that she neglected what she was supposed to do was a problem. That said, I couldn’t exactly scold her while she was this focused, so I should probably just leave and—
At that moment, the sounds inside the room abruptly stopped. The entire house fell silent in an instant.
…What?
I snapped back to my senses and tried to head downstairs, but the light spilling through the door crack suddenly vanished. No—someone was blocking it.
Through the slightly open gap, Min Soyeon was staring directly at me. The moment our eyes met—hers bloodshot and burning red—I instinctively stumbled backward.
Creeeeak—
The door swung open. A rush of hot, trapped air burst out, carrying with it a strange, intoxicating scent that stung my nose.
“…You came?”
Startled by her completely exposed body, I whipped my head away and shouted in a panic.
“…S-Soyeon! I-I can see everything!”
In my fluster, instead of apologizing for secretly watching, the first words out of my mouth were a demand for her to cover up.
But Min Soyeon didn’t cover herself at all. Instead, she spread her arms wide as if to show off even more and stepped closer.
“…Haa… haa…”
“W-Wait! Just wait a second, Soyeon…! Put some clothes on first—!”
She suddenly lunged forward and threw herself at me.
Thud—!
…Ugh.
Caught off guard by her sudden charge, I lost my balance and collapsed onto the floor.
“Ugh… A-Are you okay?”
“…Haa… haa…”
I reflexively asked if she was alright, but she only stared at me with glazed eyes, panting heavily. Realizing something was very wrong, I tried to pry her off—but she whispered something seductive into my ear.
“…I… can do it better now… than that woman…”
I didn’t immediately understand what she meant. That woman? What was she—
Before I could process the sudden situation, Soyeon, still straddling my waist, twitched and whispered again, her voice full of desperate longing.
“…Haa… haa… L-Love me too now… okay? I-I’m all ready…”
Love.
The single word that left her lips hit me like a hammer. My mind went completely blank.
“R-Right here… it’s so itchy… I feel like I’m going to die! Hurry… hurry up!!”
Her body, burning with arousal, pressed against me as she tried to strip me. I snapped back to my senses, wrapped my arms tightly around her writhing form to keep her still, and shouted.
“C-Calm down, Soyeon!”
“Hngh…!”
Even that seemed to stimulate her; she trembled violently. It was the unmistakable movement of a woman reaching climax. The sight of her—aroused by me, climaxing because of me—shocked me to my core, but this was no time to freeze up.
I held her close, trying desperately to soothe her. This was how I used to calm my child.
“…Soyeon. Calm down. I’m right here… okay? It’s alright…”
“…Sniff… haa… sniff… hic… haa…”
Instead of calming down, she only grew more excited. Her body shook as she began to go limp in my arms. Realizing my approach was wrong, I carried her—still clinging to me—into the room.
“Ugh…”
The moment I stepped inside, the womanly scent grew even stronger. The sweet aroma was so overpowering it made my nose wrinkle in reflex.
I ignored the disastrous state of the room and approached the bed, carefully trying to peel her off me. She obediently let go and collapsed onto the mattress with a soft thump, gazing up at me with longing eyes.
Her body glistened with sweat. That yearning gaze, that feverish breath. She was no longer the Soyeon I knew—she was a fully grown woman.
My head throbbed. I sighed and clutched my forehead. Soyeon shifted into a seductive pose, as if trying to tempt me, her eyes filled with expectation.
“…Come here…”
Her actions made my heart sink. I covered my eyes with one hand and took a small step back.
“…Soyeon. This isn’t right.”
“…Huh?”
She let out a dazed sound, clearly confused. I quickly added, “Let’s calm down and talk about this properly. It’s not that I dislike you. I just… I just want to talk first. I’ll answer anything you ask. But not right now. Just… just calm down a little, okay?”
“…What are you saying… Hurry…”
Soyeon sat up on the bed, not understanding. The sight of her even more exposed body made me whip my head away again as I spoke carefully.
“Not now. No… not ever.”
It wasn’t okay now, and it wouldn’t be okay later either. But I had no idea how to explain that to her.
“…I’m sorry. I don’t know how else to say it. Let’s just calm down first and talk slowly, okay?”
I slowly backed away toward the door. The moment my hand touched the doorknob—
“…Are you really… leaving…?”
Soyeon’s voice stopped me in my tracks. It was so heartbreaking I couldn’t move. What would happen if I told her I wouldn’t leave?
…No. If I gave her even the slightest hope here, it would all be over.
With a heart that felt like it was bleeding, I turned the knob and forced the words out.
“…I’ll come back.”
I knew even that answer was wrong. But… I couldn’t bring myself to say anything harsher. The sight of her face, looking like it might crumble at any second, haunted me.
I fled from Min Soyeon’s house like a criminal. Once outside the gate, I stood there blankly, staring up at the sky. Despite the dark storm clouds swirling in my heart, the sky above was endlessly bright and clear.
I lowered my head as if avoiding the sunlight and walked aimlessly, like a sinner who had committed a grave crime.
…Where did it all go wrong? What did I do wrong?
Was it wrong to meet Soyeon? Did I unconsciously give her the wrong idea? Why does she love me?
She had thrown away every ounce of feminine pride and hurled herself at me with terrifying affection. And yet, even though I had been so close to her all this time, I hadn’t noticed her feelings at all. Not even a little.
Of course, I had been vaguely aware that she might see me as a man… but I never dreamed she would look at me with sexual desire.
Soyeon… she’s just a child….
…It seemed the version of Soyeon inside me had stopped three years ago. The endlessly young, endlessly adorable little girl from right before I died.
The moment I realized I had still been seeing her as a child, a wave of self-loathing so painful it twisted my insides crashed over me.
Today, when I saw Soyeon’s seductive figure, I… got a little aroused.
I don’t know if it was Yu Jihwan’s body reacting, or Min Sungjae’s mind. Both are undeniably me.
“Ugh…!”
It was disgusting. My own behavior disgusted me. The fact that I had let my gaze linger on that small child felt unbearably vile. This wasn’t something I could brush off with “it’s just biology.”
I am Soyeon’s father. Her parent!! How could a parent look at their own child that way?
No matter how much Soyeon loved me or desired me, I absolutely should not feel that way. Soyeon looked a lot like her mother. So much so that if I said they were sisters, people would believe it. Every time I looked at her, I thought of my wife. Her behavior, even her personality, was so similar that I sometimes got confused.
But… that was no excuse for me to feel arousal toward her.
…I was simply ugly. A pathetic, lust-driven piece of trash.
I walked in a daze for dozens of minutes, endlessly blaming myself.
Tap.
Someone blocked my path. A shadow fell over my head.
“…Are you okay?”
At the familiar voice, I slowly lifted my head.
“…Ugh…”
There she stood, holding a luxurious black parasol.
It was my wife.