Chapter 64
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Translator: Silver Dragon
Chapter: 64
Chapter Title: Patricia
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The tax investigation that had rocked La Liga had now swelled into an uncontrollable storm, sucking in every issue in its path.
[Real Madrid President Nuñez indicted by Spanish government on embezzlement, tax evasion, and accounting fraud charges.]
My steadfast patron, the kindly old man next door, had stepped down from his position as Real Madrid's president over some trivial misdeed.
[Nuñez resigns as Real Madrid president. Laporta vice-president emerges as frontrunner for successor.]
A new president was elected and promptly declared reforms.
[New president Laporta reveals ambitions: 'Madrid is sick right now. We will cut out the rotten roots with sweeping reforms.']
And then, Verde, the players' friendly manager, got the axe.
[Real Madrid sacks manager Valverde.]
On the day the manager was fired, I pieced together the whole story from a furious phone call with Valverde.
"Puta! Fucking bastards. Politics in football! Be careful, Jesus! Those fuckers are going to crush anyone seen as part of Nuñez's faction."
History repeats itself. Humans make the same mistakes over and over.
Laporta and his crew, eager to look trendy by jumping on the PC bandwagon, pushed forward a young female manager.
[Patricia Casillas, who led Spain's women's national team, tapped as next manager.]
Suddenly, Real Madrid—a massive battleship—got its first female manager at the helm.
[Patricia Casillas: 'Honored to be Real Madrid manager. I will lead Real Madrid's reforms.']
She became a marionette, swiftly purging from Real Madrid anyone perceived as part of the Nuñez (Jesus) faction on orders from Laporta's group.
[Luis García and Luka Savić receive release notices from manager Patricia.]
[Luis García: 'I can't understand Manager Patricia. Luka and I got our release notices over a 30-second phone call.']
And around this time, I had a "communication with the manager" session—which is just code for a pissing contest.
"Jesus, there will be no special privileges for you anymore! I have no flexibility. There are no players above the manager, and if you care about the team, follow my orders. If you can't do that, get out of this room right now, pack your bags, and go down to the reserves!"
As soon as the manager finished speaking, I nodded.
A weak body burdens the mind. A lack of skill leads to politicking.
Seeing me nod, the manager's face lit up. I looked at her, then stood up and opened the door.
"Jesus! If you leave this room without my permission, I'll bury you in the reserves and never use you!! Your career is over!!"
Patricia hurled her shrill threats at me as I headed for the door.
I just snorted at her threats.
Excluded from the squad? Fine by me. I'll happily chow down on 800 million won every week at the reserve training ground.
"Then it's not 7.7 billion, but 8 billion? 8.8 billion?"
Pop! Yes!
A bit vulgar, huh.
I flipped off the manager and clocked out.
Crash!
"Kyaaah! That fucking bastard, I'll kill you—!"
From behind me came the sound of something shattering and the hysterical shriek of a 40-something spinster, but I ignored it.
(Real Madrid's Jesus demoted to reserves for disobeying orders article.png)
(Jesus with a bright smile. Practicing golf at the reserve training ground with the Kimchi Pirate Crew, known as his faction.gif)
But why does hyung look so happy?
Of course he's happy—800 million drops into his account every week without lifting a finger;;
Golf practice is hilarious lololol
Would be perfect if he ate a burger too lololol
For real lolol Gareth Bale + Eden Hazard? Couldn't handle that lol
When I actually packed my bags and went down to the reserves, Patricia Casillas looked flustered.
She poked around the reserve training ground, her face screaming "this isn't what I wanted," but her pointless pride made her yell anyway. It was pretty pathetic.
"I'm giving you a chance to apologize and come back right now!"
"Huh? Oh, I'm heading out now. Next to me? There's some weird peddler."
"What? Peddler? As long as I'm the first-team manager, you'll never escape the reserves!"
Still, things were unfolding differently from past regressions. In previous loops, Nuñez never got indicted, and this bitch named Patricia or whatever never took over Real Madrid's helm.
"Why did the chick who was supposed to go to Barca end up at Real Madrid?"
Patricia Casillas, the Barca legend manager who had Barcelona finishing 13th in the league.
After some thought, I pinpointed the single cause.
"Because I booted Laporta, Barcelona's GOAT president wannabe, in the balls?"
As I figured it out, the TV was replaying Real Madrid's match against Las Palmas.
[Real Madrid loses to Las Palmas at Santiago Bernabéu after all. The Madridistas' mood is grim.]
[It was Patricia Casillas's debut match. It was such a dreadful game, impossible to grasp what kind of football she wants to play.]
Why is Sergio Pepe playing as a forward?
That guy's got three hairs on his head.
Did the manager learn football from Football Manager?
The broadcast camera caught the pretty young manager. Looking dissatisfied, she started chomping her gum like some grumpy old geezer.
I shook my head at the sight.
She'd be back to the first team soon enough.
As I sensed her tragic fate looming, Johan came crawling over.
Thanks to Patrash, I got to witness our son Johan crawling for the first time.
"Baa—!"
"Aigo! Our little Johan! Who's a good boy? Crawled all the way to Daddy because you missed me!"
"Baa—baa—!"
I scooped up Johan, with his chubby little eyes staring at me, and played with him.
"Kyarr—"
Seeing Johan giggle happily made me pray for Patrash's future despite myself. Please hold on at Real Madrid just a bit longer...
[Ah... Real Madrid loses again. No wins since Getafe. It's like they're sinking in quicksand.]
"Puta! You filthy sow!"
"You're the one ruining the club! Get out!"
"Laporta OUT! Patricia OUT!"
"Bring back Valverde and President Nuñez!!"
[Madridistas unleash their fury as Patricia appears on the broadcast camera.]
[Real Madrid scrapes a 1:0 win over Andorra, owned by Barcelona's current president Gerard Piqué, in Copa del Rey round of 32.]
[Patricia Casillas records first win since taking over in Copa del Rey. This is no time to be smiling brightly.]
"You fucking bitch, smiling?! While ruining the club?!"
"You're a Catalan bitch, aren't you?!"
"Bring out Jesus!! Give him the manager job instead!!!"
"Laporta, get out! You too, Patricia!"
[Patricia leaves the pitch with a stiff expression amid fans' jeers.]
[Patricia Casillas: 'Madridistas lack gender sensitivity. They're complaining because I'm not a male manager. I'm doing a fine job as Real Madrid manager.']
[Laporta offers firm support to Patricia Casillas: 'The manager needs a bit more time.']
[Patricia Casillas thanks Laporta: 'Laporta has the best gender sensitivity at Real Madrid.']
[Real Madrid falls to 3rd in league after loss to Celta Vigo. Drifting further from title race.]
[Why isn't Manager Patricia using Jesus, Luis García, Luka Savić, or Roberto Fabian ski? And why put Sergio Pepe up front this match?]
[Player selections and tactics make no sense. How did she even get her UEFA Pro license?]
While Patricia Casillas was getting flak for her results, Jesus was raising a puppy he'd gotten from Luka Savić.
"Patrash, time for food, nom nom nom—!"
"Grrr—!"
"What's not to like? Don't like the name Patrash?"
"Woof—!"
"Yup~ You're still Patrash!"
"Grrrrrrrr—!"
"Tsk! Bark once more and it's dog stew for you?"
"Whine..."
It was a peaceful daily routine of staring down the pup.
Patricia Casillas couldn't understand the Madridistas cursing her.
'It's all because of Jesus!'
The easiest thing in the world is blaming others. Having failed to control the squad, Patricia pointed to the Jesus faction as the cause and gave interviews tearing them down.
[Patricia Casillas: 'I don't know why people want Jesus. We can do fine without him.']
[Patricia Casillas vents fury at Madrid players not following orders: 'Madrid players are sexists.']
[Sergio Pepe, silent until now, finally speaks: 'The manager seems mentally ill. Her tactics make no sense. Last game, she tried putting Neuer at striker because he's the tallest on the team.']
[Alfonso Laporta president: 'Rotten parts must be cut out.' Hinting at Jesus faction transfers?]
[Jesus faction added to release list.]
(Jesus added to release list, linked big clubs interested.jpg)
Jesus hyung please transfer and add some color to the team. Fuck.
— (Madrid protest.jpg) Can you go?
Ooh... it's burning bright