Chapter 44
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Translator: Silver Dragon
Chapter: 44
Chapter Title: vs Elche
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Pre-Match
Real Madrid vs Elche
This match was a home game at the Santiago Bernabéu. Before kickoff, we headed out to the pitch and went through our usual routines to get our game sharpness up.
I unleashed a non-stop volley toward the goal guarded by Ter Stegen off a cross from Luka Savić.
The ball curved into the top corner, out of Ter Stegen's reach, shaking the net.
"Puta madre, you crazy bastard. You kick the shit out of it."
Ter Stegen spat out a rough curse at my shot, and I nodded, feeling my usual form.
A hat-trick in the first half and I'm out.
The referee's whistle blew, and exactly nine minutes later...
I perfectly replicated the non-stop volley I'd shown in warm-ups.
The Elche keeper's dazed expression filled my view.
I sprinted to the corner flag, performed the rocking baby celebration in front of the roaring Madridistas.
"Madrid, Madrid, Madrid, ¡Hala Madrid!"
"Y nada más, y nada más, ¡Hala Madrid!"
Wait for it, goal.
Dad's gonna bag two quick ones and head home.
[What a wonderful goal. Perfect trajectory, power, impact—everything about that shot is flawless.]
[Looks like Jesus Joo's shooting has wrecked us again. An incredible goal, but I'm not all that surprised.]
[Haha, I know what you mean. No matter how flashy or elegant the goal, you just go, "Eh, that's what he does every game," and move on!]
[What is this? While we were replaying the goal, it looks like Jesus Joo has scored again.]
[We catch the dejected faces of the Elche players. Even Elche's away fans are jeering them.]
[Now showing Jesus Joo's second goal. But oh... are we watching a replay? It's identical to the first one. If the cross hadn't come from Luis García, I'd swear they replayed the first goal.]
[This is shocking. Same spot, same posture, same trajectory—another goal.]
[Insane. That's all there is to say.]
[Real Madrid leads 2-0 with Jesus Joo's multi-goal in just the 11th minute. Elche's away fans already look grim.]
[Tough day ahead for Elche fans. Still a long way to full time.]
31st minute of the first half
Luis García sighed as he watched Jesus Joo protesting to the referee that it wasn't a foul.
Does this guy not read the room? Or does he just not care?
Elche's defenders glared murderously at Jesus Joo, who was complaining to the ref, while watching their teammate stretchered off past the touchline due to injury. Luis García exchanged looks with Sergio Pepe—Real Madrid's bodyguard and La Liga fans' pick for the ugliest-looking player.
Those guys look ready to start something. Handle it.
Sergio Pepe got the signal from Luis García. On Elche's counter chance, he lunged into a rough tackle on their forward.
"You fucking dog!"
"What's your problem? The wimp just fell over."
He took a yellow card in exchange for two yellows on Elche players, successfully redirecting their rage toward himself.
Beep!
"You—you—you're warned!"
But Jesus Joo, oblivious to the sacrifice, clicked his tongue and scolded Sergio Pepe for getting carded.
"Ugh. Picking up useless cards. Sigh. When's this guy gonna learn?"
Sergio Pepe swallowed his anger inwardly.
This bastard. I hope we meet in an A-match. I'll smack him one.
"Ugh. Picking up useless cards. Sigh. When's this guy gonna learn?"
Sergio Pepe's face flushed red at my mutter. He glared at me with an expression screaming he had a lot to say, but let out a small sigh, shook his head, and dropped back to his defensive zone.
Luis García tsked as he watched. I looked at them both in confusion.
Why? What's the problem?
Elche's free kick from the baffling situation was cleared by Vladimir Radojičić and fell to me.
I pretended to trap it...
Let it roll away. Confirmed I'd fooled the defense, then sprinted full speed. Roberto Fabiański picked up the loose ball and slotted a through pass into my path.
"Robi!"
I pinched the soft inner thigh of the opposing center back trying to shoulder me off, dropping him to the ground.
"Aaaagh—!"
I lightly feinted out the Italian-born keeper.
"Che cazzo! (What the fuck!)"
Slotted it easily into the empty net for the goal.
"Easy!"
Elche's center back clung to the ref pleading, but after VAR check, the goal stood.
Elche players glared at me after hearing their center back's story post-goal.
Whatever. What're you gonna do?
If you're pissed, pinch without getting caught on VAR.
This is 200 years of handcraft know-how, you punks.
38th minute of the first half
Real Madrid 3 : 0 Elche
[Valverde pulls Jesus Joo early in the first half. Any issues?]
[Hard to say. His performance so far looks flawless.]
"Madrid, Madrid, Madrid, ¡Hala Madrid!"
"Y nada más, y nada más, ¡Hala Madrid!"
[Jesus Joo exits to applause from the Madrid home fans, replaced by Jesús González, the La Fábrica prospect drawing attention.]
[Nervous-looking Jesús González gets words from Jesus Joo at the touchline.]
[Jesús González bursts out laughing. Seems Jesus Joo eased his tension.]
[Wonder what they talked about.]
Full Time.
Real Madrid 5: 0 Elche
Goals: Jesus Joo (9', 11', 36'), Roberto Fabiański (58'), Jesús González (75')
-Jesus Joo was subbed early. Any problems with him?
"None at all. I spoke with Jesus Joo beforehand and agreed to sub him right after a hat-trick."
After the game, reporters hounded Valverde with suspicions of discord between him and Jesus Joo, noting the early sub and Jesus Joo waving to fans before heading home from the Santiago Bernabéu.
-Jesus Joo leaving the Bernabéu early—was that pre-planned?
"Of course. We discussed it. He just had a baby. I promised to send him home after a hat-trick for family time, and that's what he did."
-If he scores a hat-trick next game, will you sub him early too?
"Home games only."
Valverde pointed to an Asian reporter in the corner.
The reporter shifted to Jesús González instead of Jesus Joo.
-La Fábrica prodigy Jesús González made his debut. Satisfied?
"Very. He looked tense at first, but relaxed after talking to Jesus Joo. Handled his debut excellently."
A reporter's eyes lit up at the mention of Jesus Joo and Jesús González.
-What did Jesus Joo say to Jesús González? Care to share?
"I asked Jesús out of curiosity. Apparently, Jesus Joo runs Colchester United and asked if he played soccer, would he come play there."
-Pedro Rodríguez appointed manager at Colchester United, which Jesus Joo acquired. Thoughts?
Valverde smiled satisfactorily, steering reporters away from discord rumors toward fresh bait.
"He was an excellent player at Real Madrid. A leader with the qualities to be a great manager..."
[Madrid Connections Fuel Colchester United.]
[Valverde: 'Pedro Rodríguez Has Excellent Managerial Qualities.']
[Valverde: 'Jesus Joo Unhappy? Nonsense. He's the Happiest Man in Madrid Right Now.']
[Colchester United Manager Pedro Rodríguez: 'Already Inquired About Loaning Several Top La Fábrica Prospects.']
[Confident Pedro Rodríguez: 'Our Goal This Season is Promotion. We'll Return to the Pro Leagues.']
[Owner Jesus Joo: 'La Fábrica Has Many Talented Players. We'll Give Prospects Plenty of Opportunities.']
[Colchester United Supporters Back Owner Jesus Joo and Manager Pedro Rodríguez: 'Meeting Jesus Joo Marks the Start of Our Success Era!']
[Elche Manager Calls Out Jesus Joo's Dirty Play: 'He Pinched Hadžanović's Thigh and Scored in Between.']
[Jesus Joo Addresses Pinching Controversy: 'No Idea What You're Talking About. I Didn't Pinch Him.']
[Jesus Joo Sees Blurry Fan Phone Video of Pinch: 'That's the Hand of God.']