Chapter 34

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Translator: Silver Dragon

Chapter: 34

Chapter Title: La Decimoquinta -8

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Song Yu-na, who'd burned through ten million won without pulling my card, came over whining.

"Waaah... Why won't it come out?!"

I hugged her and gently rubbed her back.

"Yu-na, didn't you say you hate games?"

She shot me a sideways glare.

"Jesus, you! Don't you watch my YouTube channel?"

Honestly, her YouTube was kinda boring, so I never watched.

Great for background music, but zero fun.

"..."

She got my silent answer and pouted, wriggling to escape my arms.

"Let go!"

"Oh man, looks like Yu-na's boob massages are working. They've gotten way bigger."

Finally exhausting herself, Yu-na panted roughly in my arms, catching her breath with heavy gasps.

After huffing for a while, she sighed and explained why she uploaded game videos.

"Game videos get way more views than my singing ones."

"So that's why you're doing games?"

"Yeah. My old company just canceled my contract, so I gotta film what makes money. Can't just do what I want."

As I pondered her words, Yu-na asked with sparkling eyes.

"...But did they really get bigger?"

Nope. Same as always.

"Yeah, a ton bigger."

"Hehe..."

I gave a wry smile watching her beam with joy.

Does having small boobs bother you that much? Then I thought, from a guy's perspective, it's like having a small dick.

No wonder it bugs her.

I nodded quietly and patted her shoulder.

Misinterpreting my comfort, Yu-na puffed out her chest with a snort.

"Jesus! Just wait—sis is gonna grow these boobs fast and give you a paizuri!"

Something tells me that service is never happening.

After chatting with Yu-na, I agreed to appear on her YouTube channel.

I'd planned to show my full body at first, but she'd become a pro YouTuber by now and talked me out of it.

"Just your hand for now! That way we can keep pulling aggro long-term!"

Anyway, she dumped another five million won into her account and started filming.

"Everyone! I think I'm super unlucky, so I begged hubby to do the card grinding for me!"

At her request, I gripped the mouse with one hand and kept smashing the pack-opening button.

When just one pack was left, Yu-na said in a trembling voice,

"J-Jesus... This is the last one... Should we pray before opening it?"

Praying for card grinding? What the hell.

I ignored her and clicked. As the pack opened, she started praying desperately.

"Pleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleaseplease"

...At this point, is the YouTube just an excuse? Are you actually grinding to become a pro gamer?

"Ooh—flames already!!"

Yu-na cheered at the fire effects.

"Huh? For real!? Korea?!"

The Taegukgi fluttered, and I saw Yu-na's cheeks flush bright red.

The bizarre kid dancing—who sure as hell didn't look like me—made Yu-na scream and throw herself into my arms.

"Kyaaah—! Jesus, I love you! I really love you!! Mwah—mwah—mwah—"

Doesn't look that great, but she loves it this much?

But I defend well—why are my defensive stats trash?

Champions League Semifinal 2nd Leg

75th Minute

Real Madrid 0(7) : 2(3) Arsenal.

The Champions League semifinal second leg at Santiago Bernabéu played out looser than expected.

Arsenal, refusing to give up on the final, came at us full throttle.

But hardcore pragmatist Manager Valverde rolled out a 10-back double bus and stonewalled them.

Normally, the Bernabéu crowd would've booed, but the Madridistas—excited for our first final in eight years—sang on even as we got pummeled at home.

"Madrid! Madrid! Madrid! ¡Hala Madrid!"

"Y nada más! Y nada más! ¡Hala Madrid!"

Even with that lockdown, Valverde kept me on the bench for emergencies—his thoroughness earned my silent applause.

Then the Madridistas suddenly started chanting my song.

"Dios del Madrid Jesus!!"

"God, grant Madrid the glory of La Decimoquinta!"

"Madrid! Madrid! Madrid! ¡Hala Madrid!"

Touching, sure.

But I'm pretty sure I'm not playing today.

Full Time.

Real Madrid 1(8) : 4(5) Arsenal.

The day after the Arsenal second leg, we gathered at single Luka Savić's place to watch Bayern Munich vs. Inter Milan.

"Who do you want to advance?"

"Inter Milan for me."

"Jesus, you?"

"Me? I think Bayern coming up would be better."

My words split the room—some agreed, some rebelled.

"Amigo! Inter's the weaker team, right?"

"How'd a weak team reach semis, idiot? Bayern might even be easier. Goals? Jesus'll handle it. Their forwards are old, less mobile now."

We bantered until the ref blew full time. Our ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠Champions League final opponent was set.

[Tweet tweet—beep!]

Luis García, who'd opposed me, looked tense.

"Bayern advanced after all."

I scanned my teammates' stiff faces, lost in thought. The Los Blancos were grim.

No wonder. Sixteen years without a Champions League win had erased Real Madrid's UCL DNA.

Clap—clap!

I sighed softly and clapped to grab attention.

"¡Vámonos!! Don't shake, you punks! The god of soccer's right here to hand you the win!"

They burst out laughing, tension easing as they jeered playfully.

"Booo! Who said we were shaking?!"

"That guy's the one trembling and projecting on us!"

"Booo! Jesus Joo, confess the truth! The water rocket truth too!"

I shook my head at their macho act.

"Idiots."

Anyway, the end of my debut season—which shocked the world—was approaching.

With Madrid fans' cheers, we headed to Wembley Stadium for the Champions League final.

Checked into the hotel, unpacked, trained at Tottenham's loaned pitch, then back to rest—messaging Yu-na.

-ImTheNoona: Wanted to cheer you on too. (｡•́︿•̀｡)

-ImTheNoona: House feels empty without Jesus. (ಥ﹏ಥ)

-Jesus: Crowds can be risky with baby on board. Miss you already, Yu-na. (╥_╥)

:

:

-ImTheNoona: Don't get hurt tomorrow, okay?

-Jesus: No worries, won't! Bedtime now. Love you, dream of me, Yu-na (ಠ‿ಠ)

-ImTheNoona: ლ(´ ❥ `ლ) Yeah! Sis loves Jesus too ♡ Dream of me!

Flipped my phone after chatting—then it buzzed again.

Bzzz—!

Yu-na got more to say?

Curious, I opened the chat app.

-Charlie Stone: Why doesn't the world understand me?

-Charlie Stone: What's wrong with kicking weak Arsenal punks out of the Prem?

-Charlie Stone: Too many cowards in the world.

Crazy Charlie Stone messaged me.

Blocked him, browsed communities, then slept.

Champions League Final.

Real Madrid 0 : 0 Bayern Munich.