I Know It in Theory

Yesterday had been rather strange.

First, there was the Boss, who had bolted from the cafe after her sudden nosebleed. Instead of heading to the cafe restroom to clean herself up, she had dashed all the way home, only returning after a considerable stretch of time. Business had been light enough that her absence hadn't caused any trouble, but when she finally walked back in, something felt distinctly off. She had changed into fresh clothes, looked thoroughly showered, and had even reapplied her makeup from scratch.

Stranger still was her demeanor. Several times throughout the afternoon, she opened her mouth as if she had something pressing to say, only to clamp it shut again. Before clocking out, I finally asked if there was something on her mind, but she hastily brushed it off. Anyone could see she was holding something back, but I chose not to pry.

Was it because I showed her my stomach?

It seemed the Boss had very little immunity to men, too. While I had engineered the situation on purpose, her reaction had been so explosive that it bordered on amusing. In my past life, I would have immediately resolved to exercise restraint, believing it best never to put others in an awkward position. But after teasing Leehyun-noona and Yeo-eun-noona and feeling that thrill of emotional provocation, teasing people had become genuinely enjoyable. Much like savoring a delicious meal, it injected a fresh burst of vitality into my routine.

The next oddity had been Yeo-eun-noona.

When I arrived home from work, she was already holed up in her room, hard at work much earlier than usual. Wanting to avoid interrupting her flow, I simply sent her a quick text to let her know I had made it back safely. A short while later, she came knocking at my bedroom door with an intensely conflicted look on her face. Just like the Boss, she looked as though she had something urgent to confess, yet in the end, she turned around and left without uttering a single word.

First the Boss, and now my sister. Something was definitely in the air.

Bzzz. Bzzz.

"Hello?"

I had ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠just ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠stepped out the front door on my way to work when my phone vibrated in my pocket with a call from Aunt Dong-ja. We spoke on the phone every day, but our chats were usually reserved for late at night. For her to call so early in the morning meant she had to be checking in about her arrival today.

"Okay. Drive safely."

"I have a shift at the cafe today."

"Sounds good. Be careful on the road, and I'll see you later."

Today kicked off a long holiday weekend running straight through Sunday. March had officially begun, and once Sunday drew to a close, students across the country would be heading back to school for the new semester. Yeo-eun-noona had mentioned she was taking another leave of absence this term, too. Whatever project she was pouring herself into must have been immensely important to her. While I was curious about the nature of her work, I had no intention of prying until she chose to share it herself.

"I'm glad I decided to come in today."

"No kidding. If I'd been stuck here alone, I would've been run ragged."

I arrived at work as usual and weathered a relentless morning rush. Even though it was Friday, it was also a statutory holiday, so I had expected business to be slow. Yet while it didn't quite match yesterday's madness, the morning ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠crowd was still remarkably heavy. Who knew there were so many unfortunate office workers in the world forced to clock in on a red-letter day?

"Thanks, truly. You could have taken the day off, but you came in anyway."

"Don't mention it. I'm getting those study guides for free thanks to you, so the least I can do is earn my keep."

"Come on, that's not thanks to me at all. Dajeong is the one giving them to you."

"Still. That's why I feel like I ought to thank her properly... What do you think would be best?"

Dajeong had promised to pass along her GED textbooks. Although Aunt Seook had referred to her daughter as a high school senior, it turned out she wasn't actually attending school. She had dropped out during her sophomore year and taken the high school equivalency exam instead. Clearly, she carried a story of her own.

"They're just books she was going to toss out anyway."

"Even so, a favor is a favor."

"Hmm... How about just thanking her for now, and then treating her to a nice meal once you get your first paycheck?"

"Should I? I'll talk it over with her when she drops by later."

Dajeong had passed the GED not long ago and was currently buckling down for the College Scholastic Ability Test. She studied at a study hall nearby and made a habit of popping home for lunch and dinner. We had agreed that after she finished eating lunch, she would round up whatever study materials might be useful to me and bring them over to the cafe.

"By the way, every single table is taken today. That's a rare sight."

"Tell me about it. Ever since you started working here, all sorts of strange things have been happening."

Every seat in the cafe was occupied. In fact, at some tables, women who were complete strangers sat across from one another just to secure a spot. Among the crowd, I spotted several familiar faces.

"Boss, this might sound a bit conceited, but..."

"Yeah?"

"Could they have come here just to see me? Judging by how long they've been sitting there, I don't think they're on their way to work."

Normally, several of these patrons were strictly grab-and-go customers—young professional women working at the corporate offices in the area.

"Heh. You really have a habit of selling yourself short, don't you?"

"Excuse me?"

"I mean it. Sometimes I look at you and wonder why on earth you aren't an idol or an actor."

"Show business isn't something just anyone can break into."

I possessed neither the flair nor the talent for the entertainment industry, so the thought had never crossed my mind.

"Take your mask off and go do a quick pass through the floor."

"Sure. But why the mask?"

"Just want to see how the crowd reacts."

Doing as I was told, I removed my mask and stepped out from behind the counter. I made a circuit around the seating area, picking up a few stray napkins and discarded receipts from the floor.

"Yup. They're definitely here for you."

"You think so?"

"Are you kidding? Didn't you hear the sound of all those eyeballs tracking you across the room? I could hear them clicking all the way from behind the counter. Hehehe."

What was so funny about that? Unable to share her amusement, I settled for offering a polite, quiet smile. Such was the art of social navigation.

Perhaps the Boss was right, and I truly was underestimating the value of my appearance. My grasp of this world's sexual norms and the privileges afforded to men remained largely theoretical, pieced together from online research. Knowing something intellectually from articles on the internet was vastly different from experiencing it firsthand. In the real world, after all, women didn't simply lose their minds and pounce on men in broad daylight.

"Thank you for the coffee."

"Thank you, and have a wonderful day."

While I was lost in thought, a customer walked over to return an empty cup. The table she had just vacated was spotless; she had taken the care to gather every scrap of trash herself.

"Um... do you usually work on public holidays?"

"No, I normally only work weekdays. I just came in today to take care of a few things."

"Oh, that must be exhausting. Hang in there!"

"Thank you very much. I hope you enjoy the rest of your holiday."

Instead of leaving immediately after handing over her cup, the woman lingered to strike up a conversation. She was a regular who usually wore a sharp business suit and ordered takeout on her morning commute, but today she was dressed down in comfortable jeans. When our brief chat came to an end, I gave her a cheerful two-handed wave as she walked toward the exit.

"Where on earth did you learn that?"

"Learn what?"

"That! You've got to be the only part-timer in the entire country who waves goodbye to customers with both hands."

"I don't do it for just anyone, you know. I read the room and tailor my service."

"Yeah, right. From what I've seen, you wave goodbye to practically every single person who walks out that door."

The Boss grumbled under her breath, complaining that she felt like a sack of barley shoved into a corner. And to be fair, she had a point; the vast majority of our patrons barely spared her a second glance.

It isn't as though I don't feel it at all, though.

I was well aware that my daily experiences were far from ordinary. Yet because the internet and reality were two very different animals, I was still carefully feeling out the gap between them. It had only been a little over two weeks since I descended from the mountain. I simply needed a little more time to adjust.

As my shift drew to a close, Jin Dajeong came down the stairs. She carried two massive bundles of study guides securely bound with yellow twine, her arms full. Seeing someone so frail and waifish hauling such a hefty stack of books was an impressive sight.

"Whoa... that's way more than I expected. Jeongseo, do you think you can carry all that?"

"Yes, I can manage."

I answered with confidence and lifted one of the bundles. It was surprisingly heavy.

"Keep in mind how far you have to walk. Want me to call you a cab?"

"No, really, I've got it. I can take them."

If I got tired, I could simply stop and rest along the way. In my current financial state, taking a taxi was an unnecessary luxury.

"Oppa... is your place far?"

As I lifted the heavy stacks to test their weight, Dajeong watched from the side, asking her question in a worried whisper. Hearing the word oppa roll off her tongue felt strangely foreign to my ears.

"Not too far. Thank you so much, Dajeong. Once I get my first paycheck, I'll treat you to something delicious. Or is there anything specific you need right now?"

"No, it's really okay."

Dajeong seemed to be a girl of very few words. Her voice was barely louder than a breath, and no matter how I tried to offer compensation, she quietly insisted she needed nothing in return.

"Well, I'll be taking off then."

"Go on. Have a wonderful weekend with your mother, and I'll see you Monday."

"Have a great weekend, Boss. Bye, Dajeong."

Not long after Dajeong's arrival, I clocked out. But once I was out on the street clutching the twine, the real issue wasn't my physical stamina—it was the sharp, biting pain digging into my fingers.

"Oppa."

"Hm?"

I hadn't walked more than a dozen paces when Dajeong came jogging up behind me, pushing the small folding hand truck from the cafe.

"Let me help you."

"Wait, did you clear this with the Boss?"

"Yes. My aunt gave me permission."

Transferring the books onto the flatbed made an immense difference. Yet even after we set them down, Dajeong didn't turn back, keeping her small hands firmly planted on the handle.

"Thank you, Dajeong. I can take it from here."

"It's fine, really."

"Don't you need to get back to studying?"

"I was planning on taking a little break anyway. It's okay."

She insisted on walking me all the way home and returning the hand truck herself afterward. When I protested that I couldn't possibly take up so much of her valuable study time, she stubbornly held her ground, murmuring that it was no trouble at all. Relenting, I thanked her and opened the map app on my phone to show her my address.

"It's faster if we cut through here."

"Yeah, but I haven't walked down that road before."

"I've got it memorized. Let's go."

Dajeong took one swift glance at the screen and immediately set off in that direction. Walking abreast with her as she pushed the cart, I kept a careful eye on our surroundings to memorize the route.

"You're really good with directions."

"I've walked about half of this way before. It's not a complicated path."

Dajeong was full of small surprises. I had pegged her as painfully shy and reticent, but now that it was just the two of us, she kept the conversation flowing smoothly. It was also remarkably refreshing to stand at roughly the same eye level as a woman for once. Without realizing it, I had grown accustomed to constantly tilting my head back to look up at everyone around me.

"Still, it's impressive. I'm envious."

"It's really nothing... So, oppa, are you taking the GED in June?"

Flustered by the compliment, a blush crept across her cheeks, and she hastily changed the subject. Even so, she couldn't completely hide her pleasure; the corners of her lips were curled in a faint, pleased smile.

"Yeah. I took it once last year, but I wasn't happy with my scores."

"Ah... so you're planning to apply through early rolling admissions?"

"That's the plan."

Sharing the common bond of university entrance exams gave us endless ground to cover, and our conversation never once lagged. It was just as we reached the halfway mark to my house that the quiet afternoon was shattered.

"Holy shit... Even an absolute loser bitch like that gets to stroll around with a guy on her arm? Hey, call your boyfriend already. Tell him to bring a buddy."

"Shh, keep your voice down! They can hear you."

We had turned into a quiet, deserted alleyway bordering a small neighborhood playground dotted with a few weathered benches. The sharp voices belonged to two young women seated on one of the benches, cigarettes dangling from their lips.

"So what if they hear? Look at him—isn't he just her errand-boy flunky?"

"Yeah, totally ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠looks like it."

There was no way Dajeong had missed it. The girl's voice had been obnoxiously loud, and we were the only other people walking down the entire street.

As the distance between us closed, the two delinquents leaned back and fixed their eyes squarely on us. It was the sort of absurd, cartoonish confrontation that felt ripped straight from the pages of a comic book.