I Was Expecting That Kind of Thing
It was right around the time I started thinking she should’ve shown up by now when the next-shift lady pushed open the convenience store door.
“Whoa, Jae-ha, hi. That girl’s hanging around outside again. She’s seriously pretty. Like, so pretty I almost said something to her.”
So I looked outside. And of course, there was Yoon Byul, staring straight at me.
She really came.
After finishing the handover, I stepped out and asked, “Did you wait long?”
Instead of answering, Yoon Byul just grinned wide.
“Check this out.”
She pulled her mask up and slipped on those ridiculous alien sunglasses. Then she turned around so I could see her back. Written across it in massive letters were two characters.
Princess
“Holy shit.”
I almost burst out laughing for real. But that wasn’t the end of it.
“Look again. The hoodie zipper goes all the way up.”
As if to prove her point, she zipped the hoodie straight over her head. More letters appeared.
I’m the Princess
“Guaranteed deep sleep.”
“Pfft…!”
I laughed right in her face.
“Ehehe.”
Apparently she found it funny too, because she kept the hood fully zipped and shook with laughter, shoulders bouncing. I reached over and unzipped her. An alien sunglasses-covered face popped out from inside, and I nearly lost it again but somehow held it together.
Yoon Byul pulled her mask down and smirked, looking extremely pleased with herself.
“So? Pretty lit, right?”
It was pretty lit.
“You really look like a crazy attention whore.”
“What can I do… I was literally born with a star’s destiny written in my name.”
If she knows that, she should at least act like her face is worth something.
“Why the hell did you even buy this?”
“You know how much it was? I snagged it at the outlet for 4,990 won. It was fate…”
“Apologize to the 4,990 won you threw away on this garbage.”
“Sowwy, sowwy.”
With that, Yoon Byul slipped back into full attention-whore—no, disguise mode.
“So where are we going?”
“The downtown movie theater.”
“Ooh. We’re watching a movie together?”
“You think I’d watch one with you?”
“I wanna see the Detective Precure theatrical version.”
“Go watch it by yourself, you elementary schooler.”
“Uwaaang.”
And so we arrived at the downtown movie theater. We still had about five minutes until the appointed time.
That’s when Yoon Byul poked me in the side.
“What?”
“Gimme that. The thing you stick in your ear.”
She pointed at her own ear. I had started using an in-ear piece and a small mic for work a while back, but…
“How did you even know I use something like that?”
“I just noticed while watching you.”
A strange sense of déjà vu hit me. Since I had a spare, I handed it over.
“Here. Now that you’ve got this, go hide really far away and just listen. The client’s coming soon, so stay out of sight.”
“But who’s the client?”
“You’ll see when she gets here if you hide like I told you. Now scram already?”
“Uwaaang.”
That cutesy whine coming from a face and body like hers made my blood boil. Mostly because it was actually cute.
I finally managed to shoo Yoon Byul away. Only then did a female student slowly creep into view from a distance.
“Hey. Over here.”
When I waved, she glanced around nervously before hurrying over. Then came the obligatory line.
“…Did you wait long?”
“Yeah, I waited a fucking long time. If you can set up a time with Yu Min-woo, can’t you at least show up on time? You should’ve been here five minutes early.”
“I said I was sorry. Besides, you’re not Min-woo, are you?”
The girl spewing this brain-dead nonsense was Choi Se-young. She was today’s client. She couldn’t compare to Yoon Byul, obviously, but she was still a stylishly pretty girl. Fitting her looks, her quest offered pretty decent rewards. It wasn’t a main scenario, but it was close.
So no matter how annoying she is, I just have to put up with it. What choice do I have?
“Anyway, whatever. You didn’t get spotted by Yu Min-woo on your way here, right?”
“Nope. But I didn’t see him either. Does he really work here?”
I nodded.
“Yeah. He should be at the concession stand right now. So, do you remember what today’s plan is?”
“Pretend to buy popcorn from Min-woo at the stand and strike up a conversation.”
“And?”
“There’s more?”
This bitch is for real. I swallowed the rising irritation.
“I told you his shift ends at the same time your movie does. You’re supposed to walk out together and talk about the film.”
“Oh. Right, right.”
Right my ass. She’s gonna get it. I explained it multiple times. She definitely forgot the script I wrote for her too.
I handed her the script I’d brought.
“Here. You’re heading to the concession stand in two minutes, so memorize this fast. You forgot everything, didn’t you?”
“Ooh…”
But instead of thanks, I got a complaint.
“This is too long though. Can’t you just tell me through the earpiece like last time?”
Of course she’d say that. I handed Choi Se-young the in-ear and mic as well.
“I’ll guide you, but if you repeat my words exactly it’ll sound super unnatural. Just memorize this part.”
I pointed to a specific section of the script.
“Right here. You need to steer the conversation so Yu Min-woo asks what movie you’re watching. This is the most important part.”
“Got it.”
While Choi Se-young looked over the script, I checked the direction Yoon Byul had disappeared in. I spotted her pretty close by. I told her to hide far away, but this idiot… She must have noticed my gaze because she flashed me a thumbs-up. Then a text came in.
I quietly turned off Yoon Byul’s notifications. Then I called out to Choi Se-young.
“Hey. It’s time. Let’s go.”
“Huh? Already?”
“Yeah. There aren’t many people at the counter right now, so this is perfect. Go! Hurry!”
At my urging, Choi Se-young shuffled reluctantly toward the concession stand.
Fuck, I’m so worried I could die.
And the result was… a total disaster, as expected. She forgot the entire script she supposedly memorized, ignored every line I fed her, stumbled through it, and ended up blurting out whatever random nonsense she felt like.
Yet there she was, striding back from the concession stand like she’d done something impressive. The sight made me sigh.
“Ha…”
Choi Se-young stood in front of me and puffed out her chest proudly.
“Why are you sighing? I did great, didn’t I? My ad-libs were better than that script you wrote, right?”
Better my ass…
“You didn’t even talk about the movie. I told you that’s the series Yu Min-woo likes. What are you going to talk about when you come out?”
“Ah.”
Ah my ass… I was so dumbfounded I rubbed my face with both hands. I’d told her to study up on the series too, but it was obvious she hadn’t.
“The movie’s about to start, so let’s head in for now.”
Inside the theater, the commercials were still playing. I told Choi Se-young,
“Well, it’s fine for now. We’ll keep going with the plan. At least you can talk about having seen this movie when you come out.”
“True. But why did you yell at me just now!”
She poked me playfully, acting all cute. Should I kill her?
I answered flatly, “I was setting up the buildup. That way when Yu Min-woo finishes his shift, you’ll have a natural excuse to stick to him and talk about the movie.”
You fucking idiot.
“Ah…”
At this point I wasn’t even angry anymore.
“Anyway, pay attention to the movie. You have to talk about it with Yu Min-woo. Look up the current series plot on the wiki right now.”
“Okay.”
I left the theater. I figured I’d hit the bathroom before the movie started. But when I came out after finishing my business—
“Why aren’t you checking your texts!”
—there was the ambush waiting for me: Yoon Byul. She smacked my chest repeatedly, pretending to be mad and cute. I thought about killing her, but since it didn’t hurt, I let it slide.
“What did you say?”
“You’d know if you looked!”
So I looked.
Who does she think is gay? I couldn’t help but snort.
“What can I do? I need to make money.”
Yoon Byul knew to some extent that I was earning cash through this kind of work. Of course I hadn’t told her about points or quests.
“Still, you could be a bit more selective. She doesn’t seem like good value.”
She had a point. I’d thought the same thing, but—
“After getting that tint thing earlier, I thought maybe…”
“Tint? What does that have to do with anything?”
“I noticed your older sister’s and Jae-yeon’s vanity looked a little empty.”
“Vanity?”
“Jae-yeon’s in middle school now too. She should have some stuff. And your sister’s still at the age where she likes to dress up.”
Plus it paid better than working at the convenience store.
Yoon Byul’s reaction to that was…
“Whoa…”
“?”
“As expected, family love is the coolest…!”
“What are you even saying.”
“Jae-ha is seriously so cool!”
“It’s embarrassing, so shut up. Let’s go.”
“Jae-ha!”
“I said be quiet.”
I turned to leave, but she grabbed me.
“But do you really have to watch that movie? You could just let Choi Se-young watch it alone.”
Unfortunately, that wasn’t an option.
“I have to monitor whether Choi Se-young actually does it or not.”
But Choi Se-young betrayed my expectations until the very end. She managed to approach Yu Min-woo when he got off work, but… the moment she stood in front of him, she started rambling incoherently again. She couldn’t even bring up the movie.
“Plus she stuttered like crazy…”
Choi Se-young hung her head.
“Ha…”
What have you done besides mess up that you’re sighing about? I wanted to kill her, but remembering the 700 points riding on this girl stopped me. Plus all the time I’d already invested.
“It’s fine. You did well. Guys usually like girls who seem a little dumb anyway.”
“Is that supposed to be comforting…?”
Choi Se-young looked at me.
…Guess I have no choice. I tried to come up with something more comforting.
“You didn’t do anything that would make him dislike you, right? The real mission was after school started anyway. Don’t worry about it.”
But no matter how much I encouraged her, Choi Se-young couldn’t shake off her mistakes. Her face stayed dark. Then she suddenly asked,
“But why are you helping me so hard…? You’re not even getting paid.”
Well, I am getting something similar. But I couldn’t talk about points.
“Then pay me.”
“…Isn’t it just fun to do this kind of thing?”
What the hell is she talking about now?
“You get to follow pretty girls around. You can be nice to girls who are feeling down like this. And if you’re lucky…”
Ah… so that’s what this nonsense was about…
“Hey.”
I cut Choi Se-young off.
“It’s still doable.”
“What is…?”
“There’s still a chance to win Yu Min-woo over. So instead of wasting time talking crap to me, practice opening your mouth properly. And stop stuttering.”
“…”
“I’ve already come up with the next plan. We’ll start right after school begins, so prepare properly this time. If you slack off again, I’ll really kill you.”
At that, Choi Se-young smiled brightly.
“You’re actually really nice. Acting like you’re not… Are you a tsundere?”
“Whatever. Give me back the in-ear and mic.”
“Okay.”
She started to remove the mic and hand it to me, but—
-grab
She caught the hand I was reaching out with.
“What?”
“…How do I look?”
At that question, I squeezed my eyes shut. Something surged all the way up to my throat. Choi Se-young continued,
“Honestly I’m pretty good, right…? That’s why you’re helping me, isn’t it? Tell me the truth. You were expecting this kind of thing, weren’t you?”
I took out the in-ear and put it in my pocket.
“If I’m being completely honest… I could go out with you…?”
I also removed the mic I was wearing. Then I said in a low voice,
“…Hey. You fucking bitch.”