013. Conscience (2)
013. Conscience (2)
Thoughts abruptly stopped.
Not even knowing who was right in front of me.
Not even what the hell I was doing.
Everything evaporated from inside my head.
"...Hey, stop...!"
It felt like some indescribable something was pulling me along as it pleased.
A primal desire to greedily lick, suck, and drag out that voluptuous mass of fat dominated me.
The woman in front of me tried to push me away with clumsy gestures, but no matter how much of a dried-up anchovy bastard I was, I wasn't so powerless that I couldn't subdue a woman without a single muscle.
After all, the difference in gender is a tremendous thing.
"Lee Yeonwoo, you really...."
I climbed on top of her and held her areola full in my mouth.
I thought I would feel a not-so-pleasant taste or scent, but surprisingly, the smell was fragrant.
Even though a bit of sweat was mixed in, the sharp scent of body wash and lotion pierced my nose, enough to cover it up.
That scent mixed with the whiskey scent lingering inside me, paralyzing my brain, and I rolled my tongue as I pleased, struggling to somehow pull out the buried nipple.
"Ah, ssi.... I must be crazy, for real...."
While sucking on the right breast jjok-jjok, I stroked the other chest to my heart's content with my hand.
As I licked, sucked, rolled, and stroked the squishy breasts, I could clearly feel the nipple hidden inside gradually hardening, unlike the other parts.
Admiring that fact, more greedily, obscenely, just drunk on desire.
Licking away without any consideration for the partner at all, I could feel the buried nipple gradually poking out tuk before I knew it.
"Hoo...."
...It comes out surprisingly easily.
It had been hiding away so snugly until just a while ago, but as I gently flicked the nipple that popped tuk right out the moment I teased it a little, I even felt it was cute.
Unlike the breasts, the soft, tender texture of the sensation was also quite to my taste.
To the extent that I wanted to put it in my mouth just like this and roll it around for a long time—
"...."
...When I widened my field of vision a bit with those thoughts, the woman in front of me turned into Lee Yeonju.
Unlike before, not hiding her face, glaring at me with eyes mixed with shyness and anger.
Her ears were flushed a much brighter red than before.
My younger sister came into view, lying quietly as if watching just how far I would go without even pushing me away.
"...Hey."
There was no answer.
The kid who was throwing curses back right until a little while ago.
With her lips pressed tightly shut, she couldn't even breathe properly.
No way.
"Are you crying...?"
"......."
Tears hadn't pooled yet, but her face looked like it would burst open right away if given a slight touch.
The moment I saw my younger sister heavily shaking her head instead of answering.
The heat that had filled my head until just a moment ago froze over in an instant.
"......."
...What in the world.
What kind of thing did I just do?
"...Sorry."
Those words popped out of me before I knew it.
Yeonju's pupils headed toward the ceiling for a moment, then returned to me again.
What on earth is this human saying now of all times?
Her eyes seemed to be asking that.
"...."
Not knowing what else to say, I kept my mouth shut.
As I got down from on top of her, knelt awkwardly, and stood up halfway, Yeonju slowly raised her body, sat on the bed, and straightened her disheveled clothes.
Adjusting her tank top and trying to wipe away her spit-drenched chest by rubbing it over her clothes, she turned her back to me, pulled the blanket up to her neck, and covered herself with it.
"...Uh, well."
...I belatedly realized the situation.
Even if I drank, it's not a level where I can make excuses.
I can't gloss it over as a mistake.
Nor can I feign ignorance by claiming I don't remember.
While even conversing normally.
With my own will.
I committed it with plenty of time to think.
"...Were you that horny?"
"...."
"I'm asking you. ...Was I that horny to you?"
...In reality,
I couldn't even deny inwardly that she was fucking horny.
"......."
If I greet the morning of the 18th like this.
I'm fucked.
...I won't be able to return to being ordinary siblings with my sister ever again.
Therefore, I must definitely go back.
No matter what happens, I need to fall asleep with Yeonju tonight.
So..., without hesitating.
I lifted the blanket once more and hugged Yeonju's waist again.
"...Just how far do you have to go to be satisfied."
"...I won't do anymore."
"Let go."
"If we go out in this atmosphere, fuck..., it gets even weirder. ...You're the one who told me to do it."
"Haa...."
Along with a sigh, Yeonju's body stiffened.
"If you were going to be embarrassed in the first place, why did you put up such a fight? ...Only I turned into a fool."
"How the hell was I supposed to know you'd go this far, you asshole...."
"No..., shouldn't you have roughly known...?"
"......Shut up."
"Sorry...."
Fuck.
I don't even know what I'm saying either.
Arguing why she said stuff like that first if she was embarrassed.
Making excuses that we could at least do this much.
Ending up apologizing that I was sorry.
I honestly have no clue what on earth I should bring up.
...As if I should have ever imagined a situation like this in my life.
"...What kind of person does it like that from the start."
As I was babbling incoherently, Yeonju said in a crawling voice with her face buried in the blanket.
"Are you really Lee Yeonwoo? ...Aren't you not my oppa?"
"......."
...Denying my very existence.
I was momentarily left speechless by that absurd question.
Because it felt like it wasn't even entirely wrong.
If I had accidentally made tens of billions of won without regression.
Would I have still done this kind of thing to Lee Yeonju?
No matter how much money one has, a biological younger sister is a biological younger sister.
Normally, I wouldn't have cared whether she wore a tank top or whatever.
Even if I had recognized the fact that her breasts were large, it would have ended there.
In the first place, I wouldn't have even thought of lying down together on the bed.
"...."
No matter how much I think about it.
If there hadn't been the tremendous advantage of regression, even if I got wasted and slept together for a night while drunk, there would have been no reason at all to aim for that with a clear head.
Because I believed today would disappear.
Because I thought it couldn't be helped if I wanted to get my money back.
Because I considered that no matter what kind of act I committed, everything would become as if it never happened by tomorrow.
So I crossed the line.
...Then is it ultimately my fault?
Regression didn't move my arm.
Nor did money grab my head and force me forward.
Everything is what I did.
...However, I've already committed it.
Admitting my fault now and calmly greeting tomorrow is an even stupider act.
When I can go back.
When I can make it as if it never happened.
There's no need to intentionally leave this memory with Yeonju for the rest of her life.
"...Who do I look like to you if not your oppa?"
"...You crazy pervert bastard."
"That's... beside the point. I am your oppa, right?"
"...How on earth did a human being who is an oppa get horny for his younger sister? You weren't like this originally, were you?"
I buried my face in Yeonju's back.
I lowered my voice to sound as sincere as possible.
"You..., stop acting cute, then. ...Having eaten up this many years without even meeting a woman once, when the bitch who is a younger sister suddenly acts aegyo, a person..., goes crazy, this. What do you expect me to do?"
It was half acting.
The other half.
...I don't know well either.
Let's call it a dream.
Because in dreams, people often blurt out words they wouldn't normally think of.
"...You've never once been like that before, what are you even saying. Pervert bastard...."
"That's because, fuck..., I wasn't this kind of human back in the old days."
A tiny bit of strength returned to Yeonju's tone.
At least she wasn't in a state where she couldn't even breathe properly like before.
Yeonju squirmed inside the blanket, then turned her head slightly to glare at me.
"...How on earth did a person who was so damn blunt turn out like this."
"...I don't know either, fuck."
"By any chance... have you ever secretly watched my broadcast? You knew, didn't you? That I broadcast."
"What kind of nonsense is that, all of a sudden."
"You watched my broadcast, got horny and jerked off..., didn't you find out later? That's why you flipped your lid, right?"
Then she suddenly tried to drive me into being her fan, and right as I was about to retort asking what kind of bullshit she was saying.
I closed my mouth.
...Wouldn't that be better?
I accidentally watched the broadcast.
At first, I watched without knowing who it was and fell for her.
Later on, I found out that was Lee Yeonju.
But I had already regarded her as a sexual object, so I couldn't possibly endure it—
...Wouldn't that side be better than a real oppa who simply got horny for his younger sister?
"...."
...However, I didn't have the confidence to coherently string along a lie.
If she asked just about one broadcast content, I'd be caught right away.
If she starts probing about nicknames, broadcasting times, or frequent content, I have nothing to answer.
Above all.
...I'm not very good at lying.
"...I didn't watch the broadcast."
"Then."
"Originally, starting from when you played the piano... pretty? No, cool...? I did think that."
Yeonju's body moved very slightly.
"It's just that I was fucking snappy back in middle and high school. Still, I tried to take care of you somehow."
"......."
"This time, you suddenly came and showed signs of having a hard time. I tried to take care of you, even if it was just what I couldn't take care of back then."
The next words didn't continue.
Because she became cute.
Because she looked like a woman.
Because I suddenly got horny.
No matter what I chose, they were only words that seemed like I'd be fucked the moment I spoke them out of my mouth.
"...Just a bit."
In the end, I glossed over the last part.
"That's it."
"...What is that."
"I don't know, fuck. Stop asking."
Yeonju did not answer.
For a long time.
She just lay still, as if slowly retracing my words inwardly.
Then.
"...What are you doing?"
"...Stop right here."
...Yeonju grabbed my hand and shoved it inside her clothes.
Offering her chest, she grumbled softly.
"Don't do anything else now."
"......."
"Don't even speak. Just sleep."
"...."
"...If I don't even do this, I'm scared I'll really get pounced on, so be satisfied with this much for today and sleep. You fucking bastard of an oppa...."
"...Uh."
...This is driving me crazy.
Is she sincerely that scared?
No, is it a given that she'd be scared?
Honestly..., if I had lost my mind just a bit more earlier, it wouldn't have been strange even if I had pounced on her right then and there.
"...Alright."
I hugged Yeonju tightly from behind.
...I've sufficiently met the regression conditions.
Since I licked her breasts like that, saliva was definitely mixed.
There's no way I'll fail this time.
I mustn't fail.
Please....
Let me go back again.
Let me return to the 17th and make all of this as if it never happened.
I rattled off prayers inwardly to someone I didn't even know who it was for.
"...."
...Of course, there was no way I'd easily fall asleep after committing this kind of act.
Yeonju didn't seem able to fall asleep either.
The body in my arms remained stiff for a long time.
Every time I exhaled deeply, her shoulders flinched.
I too kept recalling the scene from just moments ago even with my eyes closed.
Regret.
Shame.
Guilt.
And even the emotions mixed in between, ones I didn't dare want to admit.
Everything got tangled up in my head.
However, as time passed, the tension in my body gradually loosened.
The excitement subsided too.
The alcohol buzz rose back to the top of my head.
As I continued to lie there with my eyes closed in that state.
At some moment.
My consciousness abruptly cut off.
...Praying that tomorrow won't come.
**
"Hup...!"
I opened my eyes, drawing in a breath.
A familiar ceiling.
A familiar light.
And.
The smartphone held in my hand.
"...Ha.... Haha...."
July 17th.
Friday.
7:47 AM.
"......."
I've returned.
From the night of the 17th to the night of the 18th.
Everything I committed has disappeared.
Burying my nose in Yeonju's chest and licking her collarbone on the night of the 17th,
And greedily sucking her nipples in earnest because I got horny for Lee Yeonju on the night of the 18th,
All of it.
Everything became as if it never happened.
"Haa...."
I squeezed my eyes shut.
...Thank you.
I repeated words of gratitude inwardly several times over to someone I didn't even know whether it was Allah, Buddha, or God.
I survived.
I really survived.
I won't be greedy this time.
Since I have 1 billion won, let's just roll it to exactly 5 times.
The 17th was also a day with tremendous volatility, so I can earn enough with just that much.
Later..., if an unpassable opportunity really arises, I can just lightly drink alcohol then and warmly return like the first or second regression, and that's it.
So let's stop doing this kind of bullshit now.
The moment I retraced my memories one by one and re-established my plan like that.
Dalkak.
The bedroom door opened.
"...Uh, uh. Did you sleep soundly?"
"...."
Yeonju walked out stumbling.
A face just waking up from sleep.
Mussed hair.
However, the moment she discovered me.
Yeonju's steps came to a halt.
"...."
Her pupils shook rapidly left and right.
Looking at my face, staring at the ceiling, then looking down at her own body again.
She suddenly placed both hands on her forehead.
"Ah-ah......."
A dying sound leaked out.
"...What is it."
Yeonju did not answer.
Instead, her face instantly turned bright red,
and she ran into the bathroom without even being able to make eye contact with me.
"......."
Kwang!
For a moment, it felt like my heart sank to the floor.
I urgently checked my smartphone again.
July 17th.
7:48 AM.
I definitely returned.
The date too.
The time too.
Everything was unmistakable.
Then why.
Why is she reacting like that—
"...Ah, fuck."
...That's right.
Vaguely or not..., she remembers, that kid.
That's a reaction of remembering, isn't it...?
"...."
...No.
It's a dream.
She's reacting like that because she considers it a dream.
She's having a seizure seeing my face because she had a fucking terrible dream, right?
She had a dream of... getting pounced on by her biological oppa, so she's suffering from self-loathing wondering if she had such desires herself, right?
"...."
...It has to be that way.
No, I have to make her accept it that way.
I must make that a dream no matter what happens.
I must make Yeonju herself believe... that it was just a strange and vivid dream.
If I can't do that,
I just turn into a crazy, bastardized asshole who purely hit on his younger sister.
...It's happier for everyone if we just treat it as her having had a strange dream.