So, Fuck It, Time for a Coup, Right?
The effect of taming that little mesugaki brat showed up immediately.
In the deep mountain range of the northern reaches, far from the main stronghold of the Grand Duke’s domain.
Things that had been invisible before I climbed the mountain were suddenly audible, and things I hadn’t noticed at all began to come into view.
- gurgle gurgle gurgle
“Karina. This was definitely just a frozen road a minute ago, right?”
“Y-yes. P-please wait a moment, Lord Edrick.”
Karina hurriedly pulled out a rough map of the mountain range, then took out a compass as well and started aligning the two back and forth.
Right. Basic map reading.
Come to think of it, that was mandatory for our knights too. I’d learned it as well.
It was a little hard to get used to Karina, who usually looked kind of dazed, suddenly doing something like that.
“It seems to be correct, my lord. More precisely, the map says it’s only a small stream that appears in midsummer…”
“This is a small stream?”
It was still buried under ice, but the amount of water flowing inside didn’t look like a “small stream” no matter how I squinted at it.
“Explain, you little Ice Emperor Bird brat.”
“I do not know the details either, but… is it not only natural now that my existence no longer influences the climate here?”
So the source of all this was really this mesugaki after all. Wow.
Wait. Then the Grand Duke’s domain is the same, isn’t it??
This was a much bigger deal than I’d thought.
Hold on. Come to think of it…
There were old documents, and some of them were maps no one uses anymore.
Just like Karina had now been able to use proper map reading with nothing but a map and a compass.
In the North, where people fought a grueling war against monsters, map-making and orientation had advanced more than anywhere else on the continent.
Some of those maps were almost a thousand years old.
That’s when this fantasy world really feels real.
You might ask how they could possibly preserve documents from a thousand years ago.
Well, this godforsaken romance fantasy world still had magic.
Of course the important archives were protected by long-term preservation spells perfectly suited to keeping books intact, so the paper never rotted and the records stayed in fine condition.
If the climate really changed after the Ice Emperor Bird appeared, then comparing old maps to the current ones would show it right away.
And that wasn’t all.
There was information missing from the current maps.
For example, this suspicious river flowing beside us now, and other places that had been hidden beneath the ice until just recently.
There was every chance they’d all been recorded on maps from a thousand years ago.
Then a memory of something my father once said floated up in my mind.
- Cedric, Edrick. The North may be this barren now, but in the old days it was prosperous even under a cold climate.
- Honestly, I don’t buy it. How was this place supposed to be prosperous?
- I only heard it from our ancestors, and read it in older records, of course. Hahaha.
- Back then, the North flourished thanks to abundant rivers branching out from the mountain range and underground resources buried beneath it.
- Though in my own time we’re only busy holding back monsters, driving them out and one day restoring our old glory is the destiny of House Heiden.
Back then I’d just brushed it off as nonsense.
But now that I think about it, it makes perfect sense.
Wasn’t it standard fantasy-world fare for cold lands to be packed with underground resources?
If the snow melted along the mountains because of the changed climate, there was no telling where the waterways would run now.
Anyway, the biggest problem is still that thing, isn’t it.
I’d thought that if I just killed the Ice Emperor Bird, the North would at least avoid a bad ending.
But this was the world of I Became Happy After Reincarnating as a Villainess, so the destruction of the North was basically a foregone conclusion, sooner or later.
Even if we were still in the very beginning of the original story, the deadline was at most five years away.
I sighed and messed up the little brat’s hair for no good reason.
“??? Why are you tormenting my hair?”
“What the hell is with that way of talking? What are you, some demonic cult master from a wuxia novel or something?”
“I have spoken this way since birth.”
Like she was some noble breed or something.
Just because her name had “Emperor” in it?
- rustle rustle
Apparently jealous after watching me ruffle her hair, Karina came over and started stroking the mesugaki’s head too.
“Your hair is so soft. What’s your name, little Ice Emperor Bird lady?”
“My name? I am simply myself.”
“Your name, then.”
Whether I liked it or not, she was technically my pet, so I supposed I should give her a name.
You even gave names to dogs and cats in this world.
Apparently thinking the same thing I was, Lily said,
“You’ve made her your responsibility, so at least give her a name.”
“She’s the one who crawled over to me after screwing up. Why is that my responsibility?”
Still, “Ice Emperor Bird, Ice Emperor Bird” was getting a little awkward.
What should I call her?
Ah!
“Privia.”
“That sounds lovely, my lord!”
“How do you come up with names so quickly? Lord, always imagining your second and third children and everything.”
Well, when you saw a pretty girl, imagining your future grandchildren and retirement wasn’t exactly uncommon. Ugh…
“It just popped into my head when I looked at her. Hey, you like it?”
“My name? Then I shall permit it.”
“Privia! Then I’ll be counting on you from now on. Ah, I’m Karina, a knight of the Grand Duke’s domain.”
“I am Lily, Lord Edrick’s maid.”
And just like that, in a rather warm and friendly mood, we hurried back to Heiden Grand Duke’s Castle.
For the record, the origin of her name was really nothing special.
I’d just mashed up the name of a legendary pocket monster and some chicken-brained thing living in Summoner’s Rift, and came up with Privia.
Honestly, didn’t it feel obvious the romance fantasy author had borrowed from those two too?
How many flying birds that used ice were there besides them?
***
Commander Karl was the one who greeted us when we returned to the castle like conquering heroes.
“Lord Edrick!! You’re back. What happened?”
“Did something big happen?”
This old guy used to be so solemn back when my father was alive, but lately he’d seemed unusually flustered.
Still, with the North’s Grand Duke neglecting his territory like a bastard, there was nothing for it.
As soon as we got into my room, Karl began his report.
“There’s nothing unusual regarding monsters. The weather suddenly grew a little warmer, so the soldiers suffering from frostbite have also gone down.”
“Then why are you running around like that?”
“It’s just that… Lord Cedric…”
Old man. What’s with that ominous expression?
No, don’t. Don’t say it. That’s not it, right?
“He went to the capital with Lady Miliela. He said that even if he was gone, he hoped we’d take good care of the North…”
“No, that fucking bastard really did it!!!”
There was already so much work to do. Why the hell had he run off again?
My hand went to my forehead and my body trembled with rage.
When Karl noticed the little mesugaki standing beside me, Privia, he asked in confusion,
“By the way, who is this little lady, my lord? Surely not from an orphanage again, like Lily…”
“I am not an orphan! What a rude human you are.”
No, technically speaking, you are an orphan.
I gave Privia a light tap on the head and ordered,
“Now, do what I told you earlier. Privia, transform!”
“Khh…”
Privia frowned as if annoyed, then with a puff! transformed into the form of the Ice Emperor Bird.
“W-what, whaaaaaaaaat!! What is this!!”
“I told you I was going to go cut off the Ice Emperor Bird’s neck. I didn’t cut it off—instead, I tamed her as a familiar.”
“You tamed the legendary Ice Emperor Bird??!!!”
Watching a burly old guy stand there with his mouth hanging open and only blinking was unexpectedly hilarious.
I really shouldn’t make that face when I get old.
“Hey, hey. It’s cold. Do you automatically spew cold air when you’re in that form? Hurry up and switch back.”
Puff!
“Polymorphing too much is exhausting. Please don’t make me do it so often.”
“K-Karina. Is it true? Lord Edrick really subdued the legendary Ice Emperor Bird?”
“Yes, Father. I saw Lord Edrick force the Ice Emperor Bird to yield with a mighty Sword Gang. Lily was there too.”
“It was indeed mighty…frightening enough to terrify even me, as his maid.”
Mighty…?
That didn’t feel like the right word to use here.
She’d been sleeping under the same blanket as Lily for a few days, and now weird things were rubbing off on her. What an indecent female knight.
Anyway, after seeing Karl close the mouth he’d had hanging open, I answered.
“You just said it yourself, Karl. The weather suddenly got a little warmer.”
“Yes. It’s early March, so it should still be freezing, but it feels more like May…”
Karl clapped his hands as if it had only just dawned on him and cried,
“The climate really changed? Because the Ice Emperor Bird was subjugated?”
“Probably. Which means we need to do something right now, so gather every knight and administrator who’s free and have them assemble in the underground of the castle.”
And so the administrators of the domain gathered in the ancient document archive deep beneath the castle.
“Now, Privia, transform again!”
After one more Ice Emperor Bird polymorph show, I gave the order without hesitation.
“We need to dig through every piece of information we can find about the North before the Ice Emperor Bird appeared. Especially the knights.”
“Yes, sir!”
“Karl, form a select unit and cross-check the maps from before the Ice Emperor Bird appeared with the current ones.”
“Understood. I’ll depart at once.”
“And the administrators should start decoding the important documents first.”
Since this place held all the vital documents accumulated over more than a thousand years, honestly, investigating everything right away was impossible.
But after gathering every available administrator and burning the midnight oil for several days, we were able to dig up some meaningful information.
“Lord Edrick! Just as you said! It looks like the Grand Duke’s domain about seven hundred years ago had a completely different climate from now.”
“What’s the evidence?”
“We found detailed records showing that every year in the first week of March, they held an event called the Festival of the Sun’s Sowing. The records say the North’s Grand Duke personally performed a plowing ceremony.”
“There’s similar information in the military supply logs too. It looks like they harvested spring wheat in July and immediately planted beans or turnips to gather again in late autumn.”
“Considering that the current Grand Duke’s domain can only sow barley or oats once in May, this must have been a completely different climate!”
That same afternoon, Karl returned with a scouting party and reported their findings.
“Lord Edrick! We were right!! As the frozen snow melted, we found several places where maps from eight hundred years ago are actually more accurate than the current ones!”
“There are even places that were buried entirely inside the mountain range, marked on the maps as possible mines!”
“There was information about mines in the administrative records too. There are annual inventory logs for various minerals, including mana stones and iron ore.”
Apparently the butterfly effect of taming a single Ice Emperor Bird was far more enormous than I’d imagined.
And yet the North’s Grand Duke had fled to the capital without a shred of plan, all because he wanted to play at romance.
“Karl.”
“Yes, Lord Edrick.”
“Even you can tell there’s absurdly, ridiculously much we need to do starting now, right?”
“There’s no need to even ask. We may not have time to sleep.”
“And yet that bastard calling himself the North’s Grand Duke ran off to the capital.”
“…He did run off, yes.”
Now even this old man wasn’t bothering to argue.
So what was there left to do?
I repeated the words Karl had refused to even acknowledge the last time.
“So we’d better overthrow this motherfucker, right?”