Mesugaki Acquired
As I walked toward where my Sword Gang had struck, I spotted a staggering chicken head.
"T-Tough little bird. To take a direct hit from Lord Edrick's Sword Gang."
"And from that massive sword, no less—a white Sword Gang like that, yet it's still kicking. What grit for a little one."
That's about my sword and Sword Gang, right? For real?
But yeah, boss mobs really are something else.
Frost Giants are no slouches as monsters, but the spot where my Sword Gang hit was vaporized clean—no trace left.
This thing took a direct hit and was still alive.
Though it was staggering around like a heatstroked chicken.
As I approached, the wobbling Frost Phoenix flinched and struggled to its feet.
Then it slammed its head to the ground in submission.
"That's..."
"A sign of submission, it seems. Fitting, after suffering a humiliation to match its strength."
Sure enough, just like Lily said—it looked like it was offering total obedience.
"Killing this thing is the only way to know if the North's climate goes back to normal, right?"
So, die already! I raised my sword high.
- Poof!!!
Suddenly, the Frost Phoenix's body burst upward in a puff, reverting to the form of a blue-haired girl.
"D-Don't kill me!! I've sworn obedience—why try to kill me now?!"
"Oh? So that's what it really meant?"
But where was that polite demeanor from before? This was full-on mesugaki territory.
Bratty little punks like this needed a good schooling to be fun.
"Sorry, but I need to lop off your head to fix the North's climate. Mind dying for me?"
"Climate? If it's that, then you don't need to kill me!! If I become your familiar, my presence won't affect the local weather anymore!!"
"Huh? Really??"
If that's true, no need to kill it then.
Problem is, your crimes aren't just about the weather.
"Anyway, you controlled that Frost Giant horde and killed my father."
So you're my dad's enemy.
Now hand over your neck nicely!
I raised my sword again to punish the cheeky brat, but she yelped in panic and clung to my pant leg.
"M-Misunderstanding!! That wasn't my doing!!"
"...?? It was you. I saw you controlling the Frost Wolves and Frost Giants just now."
Don't try to lie without even a drop of spit on your lips, you mesugaki.
But the bratty girl looked genuinely wronged, tears streaming down her face.
"Really, really not me. Sob, sob. That was my predecessor's doing. I'm totally innocent in that!!"
Predecessor?
What the hell was this new lore I hadn't heard before?
I demanded an explanation, and the mesugaki Frost Chick launched into her defense.
"First off, us Frost Phoenixes have a lifespan of about a hundred years."
"A hundred years?? History books say you've been here for centuries."
"That's why. When our time comes, we lay an egg from our beak and meet our end."
What the—?
That setup felt familiar.
Pulling a Namekian crash-landing-on-Earth vibe, this chicken head.
"That doesn't explain why you're not my dad's enemy."
I can't wait a hundred years, obviously.
So, die! I raised my sword again.
"H-Hear me out first!! Right after hatching, we're extremely weak, so the previous Frost Phoenix makes arrangements beforehand, or so I know."
"You 'know'? Who told you that?"
"It's instinct!! You humans know how to mate without being taught, right?!"
Huh, is that how it works?
I thought everyone learned from those fine educational videos from the neighbor country.
"What exactly are these 'arrangements'?"
"A newly hatched Frost Phoenix doesn't have full power yet. If someone attacks us in that vulnerable time, it's dangerous, so the predecessor uses all its strength beforehand to set protections."
"Riling up a Frost Giant horde to invade the Grand Duchy—that's the protection?"
"It varies each time. My predecessor might've done that, but I don't know about the one before."
Karina, who'd been listening beside me, whispered.
"Lord Edrick. Doesn't sound like a lie."
"You're not taking her side just 'cause she's cute in human form, are you?"
"H-Hardly, sir! Well, she is cute, but... that's not it! She just said it happens once every hundred years."
Right.
Uh...?
"Come to think of it, a hundred years ago, there was that record blizzard that wrecked the Grand Duchy."
"And about two hundred years back, we had half a year of polar night—no sun at all for days on end, from what I learned."
Mulling over Karina's words, it clicked.
The past Grand Dukes' chronicles really did mention massive disasters every century or so.
"So, to protect the vulnerable hatchling from attacks, they preemptively wreck everything so humans can't invade?"
"W-Well, if you put it that way... but still, it wasn't me! I'm innocent!!"
Didn't seem like she was lying.
Kill her? Spare her?
Sensing my gaze soften a bit, the mesugaki quickly added more.
"I've only been hatched for three months! Proof: I could barely control those Frost Giants earlier."
"Full power in a few months?"
"About half a year after hatching, we can use our full strength, from what I know."
It kinda made sense now.
But one puzzle remained unsolved.
"Once you're at full power, could you summon thousands of unheard-of super-strong monsters from beyond the Grand Duchy?"
"No idea what you're talking about. Even at full strength, that's impossible for me. My predecessor probably used everything it had as a limit. I can only influence monsters around these mountains anyway."
"Lord Edrick, what was that question about?"
"Just... checking on potential future events?"
This throws my plans off.
I figured the Frost Phoenix was behind all that too.
The ending of hits like a truck with zero buildup, true to its logic-shredding romance fantasy style.
I only watched half the webtoon, so I don't know the exact finale.
Too lazy to grind every route, so I skimmed the wiki—every path had the North facing the same doom.
No matter the route, an army of unprecedented northern super-monsters overruns the Grand Duchy, wiping everyone out.
Details varied a bit, but outside Cedric's route, it was all similar.
Cedric's route? Everyone else dies there too, but Cedric and Milliel survive the North's fall, I think.
Back to square one, huh.
Saying this now, but...
When the Frost Phoenix summoned Frost Giants to attack us earlier, I thought killing it would solve everything.
Fix the North's climate.
And nip that future monster horde invasion in the bud.
Then I'd chuck the Frost Phoenix head at Cedric's face: "All fixed—live well now~" and go traveling.
"Argh, this sucks. Hey, get off. Why're you still clinging?"
"Eek!! Why vent on innocent little me?!"
"Innocent my ass. You still tried to attack and kill us."
"Th-That was... well, I'll be your familiar, okay?"
Oh yeah, this was new lore too.
"What's a 'familiar' exactly?"
Not that I don't know—it's like a pet, right?
But fantasy novels vary, and who knows in this rom-fan world.
Especially one where logic explodes and monster armies doom the North outta nowhere.
The Frost Phoenix clung to my pant leg like she'd been waiting.
"If I become your familiar, I can't refuse any of your orders."
"Spill everything you know."
"Um... you could share my vision too..."
"More."
"D-Don't rush me. This is my first time too—I don't remember it all. Oh, right, the most important part."
"What?"
"If you die, I die too."
What? That's kinda scary.
Do familiars usually die with their master in fantasy?
Rom-fan style, huh.
They always love that dramatic, fateful crap.
I glanced sideways at Lily and Karina.
'D-Don't kill the cute girl...'
'Indeed. The young master enjoys kicking around little girls.'
What? I could read their thoughts from their eyes.
Not just Karina's gaze, but killing her here wouldn't solve much anyway.
"Fine. How do I make you my familiar?"
"L-Like this."
The mesugaki Frost Chick parted her top slightly and flopped spread-eagle into the snow.
"?? Why flop down suddenly? Resisting?"
"N-No!! Poke the center of my body with your finger."
Center...?
"Belly button?"
"Probably. D-Do it quick. I'm ready."
Skeptical, I touched the bratty girl's navel with my finger—and it reacted instantly.
"Hah...!!"
"Wh-What the—?!"
A massive surge of mana pulsed through my fingertip—unlike anything I'd felt before.
"Th-Then, we begin the contract now. From this moment... hah... I become... heut... your familiar... hngh!!"
"Making a mess with just one finger—truly, the young master is a demon."
"This feels like something we shouldn't be watching, sir."
Even I'm embarrassed. What kind of contract is this?
"Till the end of my life... hnng... I swear... to stay... with yooooouuuu!!!!"
Her back arched like a bow, and through my finger, I felt intense mana flooding into me.
This must be the real deal.
Instinct told me so.
Moments later.
As if it was over, the Frost Phoenix dropped her back to the ground, panting heavily.
"Hah... haa... haaa... From now on, I'm your familiar."
"Uh, yeah. Looking forward to working with you."
Dunno if it's good or not, but hey—mesugaki acquired.