The Taste of Cost-Effectiveness
Kim Hwang-je found the sight of Sirius and Baekju standing before him strangely unsettling.
‘Split him in half and die!’ Sirius had shouted before being launched by a catapult.
Baekju, who had been hiding in the shadows only to get stripped naked by the King’s basic attack.
Just what the hell were these guys?
Kim Hwang-je still didn’t fully understand them.
But their outfits were honest, at least.
They were wearing full-body wrestling tights—the Supervisor Lady’s personal taste.
Of course, the tights covered their faces as well.
Had Catiyu not recognized their magic signatures, he would never have identified them.
“Come forth! Demonic sword!”
Sirius roared as he summoned a greatsword into his hands.
Baekju drew his bow and melted into the darkness.
“Appear! Thick-Fingered Bandit!”
Kim Hwang-je used Resident Summon (Lv.2) to call forth the bandit.
The moment the man appeared, he blurted out without hesitation:
“Your Majesty! There are no witnesses here!”
Right. No witnesses meant this wasn’t robbery—it was theft. That was the point he was making.
This bandit had an alarmingly sharp grasp of the situation’s core.
At this very moment, Kim Hwang-je was trying to steal the Tome of the Rift!
The four-man team was quickly assembled: tanker Sirius, close-range DPS bandit, long-range DPS hunter, and support DPS Baekju.
The four of them stood before Catiyu like the main cast of an action movie.
Unfortunately, the bandit was already filthy again, so Kim Hwang-je clutched his forehead in dismay.
Did this guy specialize in infiltrating through sewers?
Witnessing that sight, the white-haired doll furrowed his brows.
“The half-naked fool and the filthy one are just stupid humans, so I’ll overlook them. But you two… Are you not afraid of the Master? The Lord of the Wilderness?”
Catiyu soared into the air, dodging the charging attacks from Sirius and Baekju. His expression was one of pure incomprehension at their betrayal.
Yet both Sirius and Baekju remained utterly calm.
“Our only Master is His Majesty!”
“Of course, the Supervisor too! Haaah!”
“You’ve been thoroughly brainwashed.”
Catiyu clicked his tongue and flicked his hand through the air.
Beams of light formed at his fingertips and locked onto them.
Thud thud thud!
The hunter loaded four arrows at once and fired, obliterating every single light projectile.
“I’ll take command. Any objections?”
“None whatsoever.”
The bandit responded to the hunter’s words.
Immediately after, the hunter unleashed a barrage of arrows.
The arrows bent in every direction, swarming toward Catiyu.
Catiyu twisted his neck a full 360 degrees and shattered them all with his eye beams.
Damn. That’s actually pretty cool.
A handsome man with white hair and golden eyes shooting psychic lasers from his eyes? Wasn’t that the ultimate male fantasy?
But Catiyu looked at Kim Hwang-je with utter contempt.
“By the way, human. Does the sight of these traitors in their disgusting state suit your tastes?”
“His Majesty is entitled to every taste in existence!”
The hunter declared to Catiyu.
Thanks to that, Kim Hwang-je missed his chance to speak.
That perverted tight-wearing bastard is definitely not my taste!
It’s the Supervisor Lady’s taste!
And then Baekju and Sirius took it even further.
“Mister Catiyu! This tights fashion is entirely to my liking! His Majesty taught me this himself!”
“Same here! Do you know how warm and durable this outfit is? It doesn’t tear even if it gets caught on a tree!”
“A tree…?”
Only then did Catiyu seem to understand how these two had become slaves and fought for their lives against the forest at the royal castle.
The hunter cut the conversation short.
“Enough! Do not speak with a wretch who dares insult His Majesty! Muscle Baldy will charge from the front, the bandit from the left. Baekju and I will strike from above and drive him to the ground!”
At once, Sirius leaped upward and slammed down on Catiyu from the air.
But Catiyu casually caught the greatsword between his index and middle fingers, then kicked Sirius away with his foot.
“Kyaaah-ho!”
From the side, the bandit let out a wild laugh, hurled one axe, then gripped another with both hands and brought it crashing down.
Unlike with Sirius, Catiyu couldn’t catch the weapon with his fingers.
He twisted his head to dodge the flying axe, then used the edge of his hand to smack away the descending one.
Clang!
The axe shattered!
The hand that had broken the axe continued straight toward the bandit’s throat.
In that instant, three arrows flew in along with Baekju’s poisoned arrow aimed at his back.
Catiyu clicked his tongue, swatted the three arrows aside with his hand, crushed the one from behind with an eye beam, then spun and kicked the bandit away.
“Uwaaaah!”
Sirius, who had flown off earlier, charged in again only to get hit and sent flying once more.
Crash!
The moment Sirius smashed into a wall, the door to the third-floor terrace burst open.
“Your Majesty!”
“Maester Jung?”
Jung Da-yeon and the other hunters rushed onto Kim Hwang-je’s terrace.
The building had partially collapsed, causing a massive number of hunters to fall into the terrifying dimensional trap below.
Yet the survivors had sprinted down the corridors and gathered on Kim Hwang-je’s terrace.
“The prophecy was right! Are you alright, Your Majesty?”
She shouted loudly.
Kim Hwang-je had informed Seo Jun-seo of Poyu’s prophecy and told him to relay it to Jung Da-yeon.
Having heard the story, Jung Da-yeon had already made preparations.
“A prophecy?”
The hunters began murmuring among themselves.
A few of them immediately wore expressions of realization.
“As expected!”
“The Archmage must have foreseen this in advance!”
“Then the ice buckets prepared here were meant to protect the injured hunters with those high-grade potions!”
They nodded as they looked at the potions inside the ice buckets.
Potions spoiled quickly once opened, so the only logical conclusion was that they had been unsealed for immediate use!
“I see! Your Majesty! Should we begin rescue operations with these potions right away?”
“You truly are a hero!”
What is this atmosphere?
What the hell is going on?
Kim Hwang-je felt somewhat bewildered.
These potions were leftovers from what he had made for Dave…
Something… something strange was happening.
But faced with their earnest gazes, Kim Hwang-je simply nodded.
Yeah, whatever. Just use them on the injured people right away.
The goods had already been safely delivered anyway!
There was no harm in doing a good deed!
Kim Hwang-je shouted,
“Please rescue those who fell into the dimensional space! Use the potions freely! And that monster is incredibly strong. Everyone except those confident in their strength should focus on rescue operations!”
“Yes!”
“Understood, Archmage!”
“Yes, Great Sage!”
Wait, I need to remember the face of the guy who just said that last one…
But the man had already grabbed a bucket and leaped downward, vanishing into the dimensional rift.
Regardless, Kim Hwang-je felt a momentary surge of pride.
Look at the hunters moving in perfect unison at his command.
Ah, so this is what leadership feels like!
What a benevolent feeling!
I am magnanimous!
Boom!
That thought was shattered by an explosion.
Once again, Sirius—in his tight wrestling suit—was slammed into the terrace right next to Kim Hwang-je’s.
He had been beaten so many times that his body looked like a rag.
Yet the more he was hit, the brighter his eyes shone and the more pleased his voice sounded.
“Kuhahaha… Feels great! Hit me more! I will prove my loyalty through pain!”
“…Human, just what exactly did this ‘Emperor’ do to you?”
Catiyu landed on the rising Sirius, stomping down on his chest with both feet.
Crack!
The sound of ribs shattering echoed.
“Gaaaargh!”
The floor broke apart, and Sirius rolled down several stories below.
“Senior!”
Baekju cried out.
Kim Hwang-je reached out toward the falling Sirius.
Left like that, he would die soon.
“Return!”
Sirius instantly vanished like smoke, absorbed back into Kim Hwang-je’s body.
Catiyu tilted his head at the sight.
“You keep your subordinates in your pocket?”
“You bastard!”
Baekju charged at Catiyu with a dagger in hand.
But Catiyu simply turned his head.
Struck by the eye beam, Baekju’s body twisted in every direction.
“Aaaagh!”
“You return too!”
Worried that Baekju might actually die, Kim Hwang-je sent him back into his body as well.
“Hmm. They’re still pathetic insects, but they’ve grown stronger than before. Whatever you did to them worked.”
Catiyu spoke without shedding a single drop of sweat.
Though he was loosening his wrists.
“Aigoo, Your Majesty, where did you find such weaklings…”
“They are incompetent fools who cannot even coordinate properly!”
The hunter said.
You guys seem pretty strong to me, though.
Kim Hwang-je let out a sigh.
“Human, return to the dirt from whence you came!”
“What?”
Ziiiiiiing!
A pure white laser shot toward the terrace.
Kim Hwang-je hurriedly stepped forward.
The mages on the castle walls responded urgently.
The Castle Becomes Me (Lv.4)
Mage Technique: Magic Shield
War Funds: 30 million won
Purchased from 10 individuals
300 million won payment completed
A translucent magic shield rose to block Catiyu’s eye beam.
Ziiiing—!
The beam collided with the barrier and scattered in every direction.
The wildly ricocheting lasers sliced through the entire auction house as cleanly as a hot knife through butter.
Even while maintaining that state, Catiyu endured the combined assault from the hunter and the bandit!
His body moved fluidly, yet his neck remained fixed in place, continuously firing the beam.
“You’re hardly in a position to criticize anyone else’s tastes…”
Kim Hwang-je broke into a cold sweat.
If that laser hit him, he’d be sliced into pieces before he could even apply a potion.
Auto Combat
Estimated War Funds: 51.5 billion won
Insufficient balance
Would you like to use it temporarily until all remaining funds are exhausted?
If I run out of money, I die?!
It seemed promissory notes from Jung Da-yeon couldn’t be used to pay for war funds.
Kim Hwang-je abruptly grabbed Jung Da-yeon’s shoulder.
“Maester Jung.”
Jung Da-yeon was startled.
Was this the legendary “protective hand” she had only heard about in stories?
His hand felt unusually large to her.
“Yes?”
She nodded.
Was this what being protected felt like?
“Transfer two trillion won to my account right now.”
“…No, we should fight together… wait, what?”
It felt like she had been slapped with words.
Jung Da-yeon rubbed her right cheek, which somehow hurt even though nothing had physically touched it.
She stared straight at Kim Hwang-je, utterly dumbfounded.
But no matter how closely she examined his face, his expression was completely, utterly serious as he demanded money.
Moreover, his grip on her shoulder was painfully tight.
Irritation surged through her.
“…What the hell is wrong with you?!”
“Huh?”
Kim Hwang-je had no idea why she was getting angry.
Jung Da-yeon shook off his hand from her shoulder, kicked the floor, and made a phone call.
Even during all this, the laser continued scorching the shield.
“Deposit two trillion won into Kim Hwang-je’s account! Immediately!”
After finishing the call, Jung Da-yeon hung up.
She placed her hands on her hips and glared directly at him.
“It’s been deposited. What else can I help you with?!”
It was fortunate there were no other hunters nearby.
If they had seen Kim Hwang-je like this, his reputation would have plummeted.
But the moment she realized she had just thought that, Jung Da-yeon’s face turned bright red.
Have I lost my mind? Why am I worrying about this guy?
Vrrr
Her phone vibrated.
Kim Hwang-je glanced down at it.
The deposit notification didn’t even show the full number.
Of course it didn’t.
Two trillion won was 2,000,000,000,000—a number far too large to fit in the small display bar at the top of the phone.
Reality?
He had given up on that concept long ago.
Kim Hwang-je grinned.
“Just watch from the sidelines.”
Auto Combat
War Funds: 51.5 billion won
Payment completed.
Flash!
Behold the taste of spending real money!
The Castle Becomes Me (Lv.4) had a special bonus.
* Combat efficiency will be improved.
In other words:
The cost-performance ratio of our royal castle has improved.
What did good cost-performance mean?
If one had a conscience, it meant striking a balance between satisfaction and price.
If one had no conscience, it meant ripping people off with cheap tricks.
And Kim Hwang-je belonged to the latter group.
“Move far away. I’m going to use an area-of-effect spell.”
Jung Da-yeon swallowed hard.
If even the Archmage was telling her to run, just what kind of spell was this…?
As a mage, she desperately wanted to see it, but the situation was too urgent.
“…Understood. I’ll go to the top floor’s golden crown and help with repairs.”
Jung Da-yeon said as she prepared a teleportation spell.
“…And don’t get hurt. A-and don’t worry about me either. I have insurance!”
She vanished using the spatial movement spell.
At the same time, Kim Hwang-je used Gemini’s Teleport to appear beside Catiyu.
Short-range teleportation cost twenty million won.
In front of him was Catiyu. To his right was the Tome of the Rift. To his left stretched a vast, pitch-black dimensional void.
“So you’ve finally decided to step forward yourself?”
Catiyu twisted his head another 180 degrees to look at Kim Hwang-je.
His body slowly followed the movement of his head.
The laser poured forth.
But the barrier before Kim Hwang-je blocked the beam.
Within the rainbow-colored radiance spreading from the clash of light against light, their eyes met.
Of course, Catiyu was still fending off the hunter and bandit’s desperate attacks with both arms.
“Return!”
“Ehh?!”
His subordinates cried out in shock.
But they were instantly reverse-summoned and disappeared.
“Hmm. What are you planning?”
And around Kim Hwang-je’s body…
“Doll, does salt water ruin you?”
Splash—!
Kwaaaaaaaaah!
An overwhelming volume of water poured down.
White foam and a tidal wave that filled the entire field of vision erupted forth.
“Haha! A mere water spell?”
Catiyu laughed mockingly.
“It’s nothing a Dispel can’t handle! Magic, begone—Dispel!”
Catiyu was wrong.
This wasn’t a summoning spell. It was a natural phenomenon.
He had dumped the entire ocean current and waves flowing in front of Sinal Port directly onto Catiyu.
Using The Castle Becomes Me (Lv.4), he had brought forth the sea in front of his newly acquired territory, Sinal Port.
This was the true cost-effective tactic.
“Huh?”
Splash, splash, splash, crash!
Imagine the Han River bursting forth in this short time and narrow space.
What poured out was even greater—the overwhelming flow of the sea itself.
The massive volume of water surged through the narrow gap at airplane-like speeds.
Catiyu didn’t even have time to recast Dispel or Teleport.
“Uh… um… eh?”
Thud!
Kwaaaaaaaaah!
An impact like being struck by thousands of blunt weapons engulfed Catiyu.
“Uwaaaaaah!”
Catiyu was swept away as if hit by a speeding dump truck.
Instead of the black dimensional hole, the water slammed him into the building wall behind him, shattering it and pouring downward.
Good. Now get dragged straight into the dimensional rift!
Crash crash crash!
Catiyu, swept away by the sea, vanished through the window and into the Han River outside.
Feels like I just pressure-washed the place…
War funds consumed so far: 2 billion won.
Continue battle or retreat.
The taste of frugality!
Kim Hwang-je glanced at the status window and spoke.
“Appear, bandit!”
“Yes, Your Majesty!”
“You said there were no witnesses, right?”
“Correct!”
The bandit scanned the surroundings with hawk-like eyes.
Since he had sent Jung Da-yeon upstairs as well…
He’d pay her back with money later.
“Alright then…”
Kim Hwang-je took the Tome of the Rift from the pedestal and shoved it into the trade window.
Come to think of it, something felt off.
“Poyu?”
“Yeah? Uncle?”
“What was that prophecy about the building splitting apart? It wasn’t that guy, right?”
“Yeah, not him… but it does feel like it’s about to split soon.”
Kim Hwang-je looked upward.
Other than the golden crown having issues and destroying Seoul’s barrier, what else could cause this building to split?
Maybe…
That guy wasn’t the only bucket after all?
At that moment, the building shook once more.
Vrrrr—!
Then came the eerie laughter of a woman.
Beyond the collapsed wall, a crimson aura poured down.
Your Majesty!
You have worked hard!
Congratulations on obtaining the Tome of the Rift.
Please head to the golden crown with the tome!
Once you arrive, I will take care of everything.
You must protect this city.
That’s right.
The scene the eunuch had shown him was still vivid.
He had no desire to witness Seoul being destroyed again.
Kim Hwang-je swept the remaining three holy relics on the terrace and all the leftover potions into the trade window.
“We need to head up too. Appear, hunter!”
“Your Majesty! If you send us back like this…”
But the hunter quickly fell silent as he saw the auction house with one entire wall missing.
“Call the bulldogs. Let’s go up!”
“Yes, Your Majesty. Appear! Hot-dogs!”
Of the three bulldogs that popped into existence, two recoiled the moment they saw Kim Hwang-je.
They were the ones who had nearly died because of the sewer golem.
“Kiiiiiing!”
“Kiiing! Kiiiing!”
“Huff huff…”
The third one, knowing nothing, wagged its tail happily and approached.
“Ah, these guys sure hold grudges…”
“It’s a perfectly natural reaction.”
In the end, Kim Hwang-je mounted the only bulldog that welcomed him and headed for the rooftop.