Bocchi... (in a shy tone)

"Aish, quit the spam! Quit it... Quitkai... Mankai."

The chat was already on fire. And the vote hadn't even started yet.

Still, seeing how split the reactions were, it seemed like the candidates themselves were a hit.

"Aish."

They seemed especially, passionately invested in the true identity of candidate number ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠three. What exactly are these people picturing right now? Is there seriously nothing in their heads except dirty stuff... sheesh.

"Alright then, Messiopea. What do you think it means?"

Click.

I pulled up the donator's chat history and slapped it right onto the broadcast screen.

"We're short on time, so answer quickly."

"No, I don't want a sorry. I am rea~lly curious what went through your head when you saw that name, that's why I'm asking."

"Hah... just tell me what you were thinking. Answer. Hey, you gonna answer or what? Hm? Heh."

A snort of laughter slipped out of me. What was with clamming up all embarrassed the second I locked them in and asked? Cute. So cute.

Anyway. After I hounded them for a good while, a chat finally crawled up the screen.

"Oh, is that so?"

"That's actually the right answer, though? It is a room you can't leave unless you talk. Since you got it, I'll fix the name~"

The moment I changed the name, our precious Bocchi Squad started screaming and withdrawing their support for number three.

Hey, what was I supposed to do? Actually name the cafe "A Room You Can't Leave Unless You XX with Bocchi"? I'd be too embarrassed to show it to a single living person.

So why did I put it in there, you ask... well. I just thought it'd be funny. And the reactions really were delicious. Haha.

"Ahem ahem, then let's start the vote."

I said it, and hit the start button.

A flood of numbers drowning the chat. Hmm.

Just going by the chat flying by, number three was out, and number four was too generic so that was out too. Number one and number two looked about even. I'd have to see the results to know who actually won.

"Ah, that's a minute. Shall we check the results?"

Time slipped by in a blink. Now it was time to see the results. Let's see, let's see.

Click.

"Aah~ the cafe name is now Bocchi-tachi! Everybody clap! Clap clap clap clap clap clap."

"Calm down, okay? We've gotta respect the results, right?"

I typed Bocchi-tachi into the name field and hit create.

My commemorative fan cafe was born. Not for idol Jimin Lee — for streamer Bocchi. It felt pretty good.

"Hey now, what's wrong with Bocchi-tachi? Ah, for those of you who don't know Japanese — it basically means Bocchi's crew, Bocchi's companions. Kind of makes you think of the Mugiwara Kaizokudan, right? The Straw Hat Pirates?"

"The Bocchi Pirates? Oh, that actually sounds pretty good."

Talk of pirate crews and suddenly that scene floated up in my head. I let the corner of my mouth curl up — hee — and leaned in close to the mic, whispering it with a little ASMR texture.

"Pffthhh... since I made it... join... go go~"

I'd told them to join, so next was... ah. I needed to make boards and stuff too. We were doing an end-of-stream game today, so first a game recs board. Should I make an anime board too? And a humor board, and an ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠Irelia board, ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠and a food/travel board, and an esports board...

Ah, shit. Now I was getting excited just thinking about it. Did this mean I could finally do stuff like "Part 1: Cafe Reading" the way the big-name streamers did?

"I'm so proud~"

"There they go being spiteful again. Don't be like that — if you're Korean, please join Bocchi's cafe. Timeout bot!"

I said it, and checked the member count. About a hundred people had joined by now, right? That was the hope I was carrying when I looked...

"Heh."

A smile leaked out of me on reflex. About six hundred people were watching my stream right now. And more than half of them had already joined?

This was pure love.

"Guys, what is this? You were just sitting there going, 'you join it yourself.'"

"Ahem ahem heh... nice. Alrighty~ since I got you all to join the cafe, shall we boot up some Irelia?"

"Just kidding. Let me take a look at the posts you guys wrote."

I was in a good mood, so I figured I'd mess with their feelings a little.

I opened the full post list and... oh. There were already enough posts to fill the entire first page. That Bocchi Squad firepower, huh.

Of course....

"Um... thank you for writing posts."

Not gonna be easy. Then again, this is how our fan cafe should be. Love the vibe. Love it.

"Hm? A suggestion?"

I was skimming the posts when one of them snagged my eye. A suggestion, huh. Come to think of it, I should make a suggestions board too. I'd set that aside for now and take a look.

"Uh... um."

My face went completely blank.

Right. I'd decided I was going to use Bocchi-speak on stream from now on. Stick a ~Bocchi on the end of sentences, roughly. Bocchi~ Bocchi~ when I was in a good mood. Bohanghanghang when I laughed. Bocchiiii... when I was sulking.

I definitely needed to use it. Yeah — I needed to use it to keep idol Jimin Lee and streamer Bocchi separate. That was the whole point. Except....

"Ah, I forgot. Bocchi Bocchiii... ugh."

Just mortifying. Mortifying on a cellular level. How had I even managed this last time?

GRAAAAAAAAH.

"Ah, I'm not shy though? Bocchiii... hnn."

I genuinely could not do this. The secondhand shame was off the charts. Okay. Rapid analysis complete.

"Alrighty~ shall we look at the next post too~? Doesn't look like any game recs have gone up yet~"

Just going to change the subject.

Nothing happened.

Anyway. I went looking for a post actually worth reading, and—

"......"

...This time, it was my name.