Toypus Mine (1)
"Today~ I'm the scorpion stew chef... fuck."
I tried reciting the line with a lively, childlike, bright smile from my past life's memories, but gave up.
Realizing I was making scorpion stew—not that delicious ramen—had soured my mood.
It's really just a protein liquid you can't even call stew...
I had a huge aversion to it at first. And when those past life memories resurfaced, my tongue was still pickled in fancy foods.
-Squiiiish!! I can't eat this shit! Bring me fine wine right now!!
'You little bitch! Taste the scorpion!'
-My tongue!! Kyieeeek...!!
Back then, I immediately disciplined my tongue, and now scorpion stew was at least tolerable.
As the lord, I had to forget about luxuries like that. Once the territory got livable and I stacked some cash, I'd retrain my palate, I vowed.
"Oh... removing the tail tip reduced the bitterness?"
Anyway, after eating nothing but scorpion stew for over a month, I was sick of it. So experimenting with variations before cooking had become my hobby.
Fry the scorpions first. Discard some parts. Or see if it pairs with cactus.
In that sense, today's experiment was pretty satisfying.
"Mmm, this qualifies as gourmet."
-Kyieeeek.... A death rattle like a condemned prisoner's wail echoed from somewhere, but it was probably my imagination.
"Another bowl?"
I was thrilled after making a decent dish for once. But then.
A Holy Knight appeared behind me, scolding me. Gaban glared from behind him too.
"Look! The earl's eating proper food all alone! It's utterly humiliating to heed this man's words!"
"Huh?"
"Haa... Lord Yuran. Truly... I hoped you weren't like this..."
"Huh?"
Tecus sighed, believing the Holy Knight's accusations against me. Ah, I got it. They returned to the mansion, spotted me chowing down on something tasty, and their pent-up emotions exploded.
Couldn't be helped then. Time to treat them too.
"Busted."
"Lord Yuran, your people are right now—"
"Wanna share the gourmet I've been eating?"
I gestured toward the kitchen with a gentle smile, but the Holy Knights' faces hardened further.
"Earl. Do I look like I'm joking?"
Tecus's face was utterly expressionless in particular. Scarier than Gaban's snorting rage.
Far from scared, I looked forward to their reactions soon.
"I'm not joking either. I just wanted to introduce what I've been eating to you Holy Knights."
"Hah. Fine. I'll punish you myself for ignoring your people's pain. First, dispose of that food."
"Aw, what a waste."
"Gaban, fetch the food the earl was eating from the kitchen."
"Yes, sir!"
Gaban rushed into the kitchen at Tecus's order. He shot me a glance on the way.
'You're done for.' That's what his face and eyes said.
But that righteous look of a monster-slayer vanished when he emerged with the battered pot moments later.
Incredulous. Or confused, wondering if it was a trick or deception.
"Gaban, what's wrong?"
"I-it's just..."
Unable to explain, Gaban silently brought the pot to Tecus.
Tecus peered in and grimaced.
"Earl... were you really eating this?"
"Yeah."
"This is... what the people outside eat when there's nothing else. The stuff they eat out of desperation..."
"Exactly."
I stopped smiling and shifted to the blank expression Tecus had worn earlier.
"Did you think I had separate food?"
"...You're the earl."
"Where would I get the money to hoard luxuries in a territory like this? And since we met, I've never discriminated against or belittled the people even once."
"......"
"What made you think I was gorging on delicacies while my people starved and died in agony?"
"......"
"I'm really curious."
Well, the answer was obvious without them saying it. Prejudice, preconceptions. I didn't look like an upstanding guy, and I was a noble who'd been irreverent to their saintess.
Plus, they'd seen the commoners' harsh reality outside the mansion. Then they caught me alone, humming and eating something tasty.
Anyone would've thought, 'Ah, that bastard's a real piece of shit.'
Plan's working.
I'd timed the scorpion stew precisely for their return. Humming while cooking or eating—I figured it'd provoke a reaction no matter what.
"We... made a mistake. Our eyes were clouded. We're sorry... Lord Toypus."
Tecus apologized meekly.
"Captain Tecus...! What if that guy—!"
"Enough. It was our fault. No evidence, just emotional speculation—stop it."
"......"
Mmm. I could've grabbed a few hooks if I wanted.
'Earl! You must've diverted the food somewhere!'
'You planned this to trap us!'
'How can we trust a guy who toyed with the saintess!'
Plenty of openings, yet Tecus owned his mistake. Sure, I'd orchestrated this, but my conscience was clear. Over a month of scorpion stew. No embezzling food or money. No mistreating the people.
"If you demand punishment, I'll accept without complaint. I won't beg forgiveness. This is something no servant of the gods should do."
The other Holy Knights, including Gaban, bowed their heads silently at Tecus's words.
"Punishment, huh..."
"......"
They tensed slightly at my mutter. Truth be told, they could've zipped it and pretended nothing happened. I was just a figurehead western earl with no real power—peasant-level.
They could've ignored any "punishment" and left without issue, unless I snitched to the pope or saintess.
Wait, are they doing this thinking I'll tattle to the pope or saintess?
The thought crossed my mind, but Tecus's eyes showed genuine remorse. They were human, Holy Knights devoted to their god.
"Eh... whatever, it's fine. Punishment? Nah."
"But we—"
"Then grant me one request."
"A request...?"
All the Holy Knights, Tecus included, eyed me curiously. Wondering what request would replace punishment.
"But first."
I dropped the slouch and stood straight before them. Then bowed deeply.
"I deeply regret my rude words to the saintess before. I'll apologize to her sincerely later too. I'm truly sorry for making you, her devoted Holy Knights, uncomfortable."
No excuses—just head down, apology.
For this territory, I could do worse. This was just a fraction of that resolve.
"Lord Toypus..."
"As lord of Toypus Earldom, I earnestly request your aid in subjugating the monsters infesting Toypus Mine. Please help us."
-Clack.
Tecus placed a hand on my shoulder after hearing my apology and lordly plea. He spoke in a warm yet solemn tone.
"Lord Earl, we've no ground to stand on either. Raise your head. We'll heed your words. Tell us more about those mine monsters."
His humane, upright words didn't make me lift my head. Instead, my shoulders trembled slightly.
Kuhuhu. Now just worry about after the mine's cleared.
No answers on the original plot, but the saintess had inadvertently solved the mine issue.
These Holy Knights could handle mine monsters easily.
Now, my concerns were mining, sales, trade goods. That'd be the territory's oxygen tank.
Original plot? Pushed to the back burner.
Keeping it intact mattered, especially Hero and heroines—Demon King and monsters intertwined, so utmost caution.
But right now, those worries vanished.
In the original, my fate and this territory needed changing.
A month of my struggles, the people's suffering—I'd felt it all. This mine solution would turn it around.
Just seeing a slightly better future for the territory, I busied myself suppressing the grin.
Couldn't let Tecus see this face, so I kept my head down.
Aigoo, that pretty saintess. Really wanna praise her.
Anyway. Next time I meet her, I'll thank her properly. She'd saved this place, after all.
A thanks wouldn't derail the plot much. If it did from just that, it'd be weirder.
...Yeah. It'd be fine.