Festival (7)
“Mmnh— pah— haah… hah… haah… Ru… Rubia…?”
My head was a mess.
It had already been tangled enough, and now it was flooded with that slick, sticky sensation—filling every corner until my whole body burned and tingled. My stomach fluttered with sharp little thrills; strength drained from my arms and legs until they hung limp. The world spun. My breathing snagged and twisted. From the lip she had bitten, from my tongue, the coppery taste of blood rose.
“Haah… I bit too hard. I’m sorry.”
Rubia’s finger pressed against my lips. At the same time a warm current of power wiped the blood-scent clean away.
“Noah. Still… not enough?”
That sticky, wet voice licked along the shell of my ear. I couldn’t even understand what she was asking was lacking. Already—already my mind was—
“Nnh… ahh, hnn…”
I don’t know.
I need the greatsword. I don’t even know if these trembling hands can hold it, but I just… I just need it…
“Looking for the greatsword?”
“Y-yes… yes…”
Shallow breaths brushed my nose; swaying strands of hair tickled my cheek, then slid past and over the top of my head. Rubia’s body drew closer and closer.
“Uh… uhh…”
She didn’t stop at approaching. She began to press down on me, weight settling heavier by the second. The arms that had been barely holding me up—already quivering, strength gone—finally gave way.
“Nnh… hyaah…?”
At the same moment Rubia’s hands caught me and gently laid me down.
“Ru… bia?”
Her hair swayed and brushed my face.
“Here. The greatsword. Take it.”
And then the hilt touched my fingers.
I wanted to grab it. Right now—seize the greatsword and see Rubia’s expression. But I was afraid. I didn’t know why. Just… just the thought that maybe it would be better if I still couldn’t see anything…
“You’re not taking it?”
“I-I’ll take it…”
Still evening out my ragged breathing, I closed my hand around the greatsword.
Everything painted itself into existence.
Rubia’s disheveled hair. Her clothes. Her breathing. The way she bit her lip, holding something back. Her right hand planted beside my head. Her left hand halted just above my chest. Her leg slid between mine. And her heart—beating even faster than mine.
“Will you answer me now?”
“Answer… what?”
“Whether your faith… is lacking.”
A sweet, almost growling voice rolled out low and quiet.
I had to answer. I knew that. But my body didn’t want to.
Rubia’s breath drew nearer. Her hair skimmed across my cheek. And when our foreheads touched again—
“It… is… lacking.”
I had no idea what I’d just said. My body simply spat out the words it wanted most.
As if that was exactly what Rubia had wanted too, she curved her lips into a bewitching smile… and once more pressed her mouth to mine.
Unlike before, it was soft. Gentle. Yet it still wound deeper inside, crushing everything of me, grinding it down, wrapping it tight.
“Noah.”
Right now… what in the world had I just done?
Rubia… why had Rubia done that?
No—more fundamentally—what… what even was this situation…?
Ru… Rubia is a girl, and I’m… well, a girl for now too…
Uh… but…
…I don’t know.
My thoughts knotted into a hopeless tangle. Was it because my lips still burned? Or because Rubia’s scent still clung to my skin?
Ru… Rubia… with a body this… s-small—
“Noah!”
“Hic—! Y-yes?!”
“How long are you going to stay like that?”
“…I-I’m… th-this is comfortable…”
“My shoulder hurts.”
“Nngh…”
Sitting just far enough that only our fingertips could touch, I tightened my grip on the fingers I had barely been holding. The bed swayed and creaked.
“Since you won’t come all the way over, I guess I’ll have to go to you.”
“H-hiiik…”
And of course she did—arriving right behind me and wrapping her arms around me with all her strength. That wicked, soft, plush sensation enveloped the back of my neck.
“Haah… this feels so good.”
Thump— thump— thump— thump—
My heart hammered like it was trying to punch its way out of my chest. My hands and feet trembled; my breathing turned shallow and fast.
“Can you trust me now?”
From behind, the fingers of the arms holding me traced my lips. Traced them, then slipped between and tapped against my teeth.
“H-hik… hahk!”
“You still can’t?”
“I-I trust you…”
“Good. I’m glad.”
Rubia’s head settled onto my shoulder. Hot, rhythmic breaths—ssaehk, ssaehk—licked at my ear.
“Don’t say things like that again.”
“I-I… understand…”
“I won’t ask why you suddenly thought that. But when those thoughts come, just tell me.”
The finger that had been stroking my lips slid down my cheek and found the nape of my neck—exactly where her mouth had lingered so long before.
“Until you can trust me completely… until you can’t even think those things anymore… I’ll carve it into your body.”
“Nngh…”
“Answer.”
“Hyaah…! Y-yes… yeheh…”
For a long while she stroked the back of my neck, then pulled me into her arms again.
“Haah… aren’t you hungry?”
“N-no…”
“You should eat at least a little. Should I go out and buy something?”
Her arms began to loosen; her body started to pull away. Instantly I caught those loosening arms again and leaned back against her.
“N-no…! Just… just staying like this… is that not okay?”
“…Oh my?”
“If you’re hungry, Rubia… then… let’s go buy something together…”
“Ah… no. I’m not hungry either… so… yeah. We’ll just stay like this… I guess.”
“Mm…”
Once I felt the strength return to her arms, I wriggled around and wrapped my own arms around her waist.
“Tighter… hold me tighter…”
“You’ll suffocate.”
“Th-that’s… good.”
“Wow…”
Rubia let out a short, incredulous laugh and hugged me a little more firmly. She still held back enough that I could breathe and move freely—but that careful consideration only made my heart pound harder.
“Th-thank you… thank you, Rubia…”
All the chaos in my head had been sorted out by her. The gloomy thoughts, the unhappy memories, the frightening future—everything of mine had been painted over with Rubia.
Someday those thoughts might come back. They almost certainly would. But right now I just wanted to savor this feeling. This touch. This scent. This atmosphere. I wanted to feel every last piece of Rubia.
Once everything settled… once the heat cooled… I’d probably be too embarrassed to look her in the eye, too shy to hold her hand, unable to act like I usually did. Even so—right now I wanted to be happy.
“I’m grateful too, Noah.”
“R-really…?”
“Of course. There are so many things I’m grateful for… more than I can even handle.”
“I… see… heh, heheh…”
I buried my face in that soft, plush embrace and nuzzled back and forth. We stayed like that for a little while.
Thump— thump— thump— thump—
It wasn’t Rubia’s usual heartbeat. It was that terrifyingly fast, wild rhythm again.
“Uh… uhh… Ru… bia…?”
“Haah… yes?”
Hot breath. Rough breathing that once more painted the inside of my skull pure white. Arms that refused to let go no matter how I twisted. Legs that locked around me the moment I tried to scoot my hips back, as if saying don’t you dare leave.
Wh-what do I do. If this keeps up… it’ll be just like earlier again…
“Noah, just one more—”
“Ru-Rubia! A-ah… that… important thing you mentioned earlier today… wh-what was it?”
“Important thing…?”
“Y-yes… you know… the thing you said you’d explain properly…”
“Ah.”
With a soft tsk of her tongue, Rubia released me.
Th… thank goodness… that was close…
“Hoo… I’d completely forgotten the important part.”
“Y-yes… the im-important part…”
Rubia gave a small laugh, slowly evened her breathing, and opened her mouth.
“I was going to teach you how to handle mana.”
“Eh… mana…?”
What on earth was she talking about all of a sudden? Mana? I don’t even have mana…
“Yes. When you slept for a whole month this time… mana appeared inside your body.”
“Whaaat…?! M-mana? In… in my body?”
“Yes. Mm… want to try sensing it lightly?”
“H-how…?”
Rubia’s hand gently enclosed mine.
“You already know what my divine power feels like, right?”
“Of course…”
“Then I’ll send a little divine power into you. Follow the flow carefully.”
The moment she finished speaking, her divine power flowed into me. Slowly, slowly—riding my fingertips, past my shoulder, through my heart, down to my lower abdomen. It dipped through my lower body, then returned to my heart. And once it had gathered there… whoosh—!
“Uhhnn… g-goosebumps…”
The warm divine power vanished all at once, and my whole body shuddered.
“There… that should do it. It’s gathered near your heart right now, isn’t it?”
“…N-no?”
“…What?”
“It… it spread through my whole body…?”
“…What?”
With the hand she wasn’t holding, I traced the path the divine power had taken.
“From here… it went like this… then like this… and then… it gathered at my heart and—whooosh…! It disappeared.”
Rubia, who had been sitting perfectly still and barely breathing, suddenly let go of my hand and stood up.
“Uh… Ru-Rubia… where are you going…?”
“To get the greatsword. Let’s try again while you’re holding it.”
“Ah… o-okay…”
Footsteps that had moved away returned with a clatter-clatter of metal.
“Ugh… so heavy… hah… here, Noah.”
With a weary sigh from Rubia, the greatsword settled across my knees.
“Thank youuu…”
I bowed my head and took hold of it.
“You can feel things more clearly when you’re holding the greatsword, right?”
“Yes.”
“Good. Then let’s try once more. Tell me where the divine power disappears to.”
Again, the instant her words ended, divine power entered me. It followed the same path as before and gathered at my heart.
“How is it?”
“Uh… uh… uhh…?”
“Noah?”
“Th-this… eh… ah…?”
The divine power that had definitely been pooled near my heart an instant ago suddenly flooded outward and soaked into every part of my body. And in the places it soaked into—
“Ru-Rubia… I… there’s something strange inside me…”
Something whose texture was completely different from Rubia’s divine power. Not mana either. A strange energy I had never felt before.