The Weight of Truth
That single touch had unintentionally let me peer even deeper into his heart. Once the boundaries of contact dissolved, the echoes became painfully raw.
-I should have realized it every time the young lord pointed his sword at her. Just how foolishly attached I am to this person… and that it’s already far too late to turn back, even though I know it’s hopeless.
Moments like this reminded me that the Tears of Truth was an incredibly dangerous artifact.
Because learning things I was never meant to know ended up affecting even me.
Truth always stained me in one way or another.
Whether the feeling it brought was negative or positive, the weight of truth made me realize just how light my own heart was. And perhaps… just perhaps, it made me think that I might actually hate the idea of Ash marrying someone else.
I shook the thought off quickly, but when he looked at me with those tender eyes, I couldn’t help but waver.
Ash kept his lips pressed to the back of my hand for a long time, simply staring at it, before he finally lifted his gaze to mine. His voice came out laced with laughter, as if the whole thing were some silly joke.
“But why are we having such heavy conversations? It’s such a waste when we finally have a moment alone.”
“That’s because you suddenly started talking about useless things. Marriage? What a pointless topic.”
“Yes, it’s my fault.”
“I know it’s important to you… but it has nothing to do with me.”
“I’m sorry.”
Despite his usually calm exterior, I could tell Ash carried a lot of worries. Among them, marriage was a relatively minor issue.
The siblings he had to protect, the difficult path to the throne, Robenin who kept bothering him, the guardians whose numbers still weren’t complete, and the nobles who pressured him while he couldn’t tell if they were allies or enemies.
Headaches were scattered everywhere, and the tangle was so complex that even I, who had secretly peeked inside, felt my head start to throb.
I had looked too deeply into his inner thoughts. It was making me dizzy.
The flood of information became too much to handle, so I had to pull my hand from Ash’s grasp.
“We look like idiots standing here like this.”
Right now, Ash and I looked exactly like one of those sickeningly sweet couples flirting in front of an inn.
Completely unaware of my real reason for pulling away, Ash quietly nodded, then stepped closer and deliberately pressed his lips to my ear as he whispered.
“Do you think the young lord saw?”
“Robenin? Probably. He’s not the type who can’t see just because it’s a little dark.”
With night vision better than a wild animal’s… Suddenly I realized Ash was intentionally kissing my ear and slowly pulling my waist closer with both hands. I doubted that putting on a show like this would make Robenin treat me any more gently.
“Jeanie, I’ll do my best to stop him, but please don’t provoke the young lord any further. He’s someone who acts on instinct… If he sets his mind to it, there’s no telling what he might do.”
“Hmm…”
“Even earlier. He really could have killed you.”
“…I know that much.”
“It’ll be difficult, but try to reconcile with him.”
Ash’s hand was gently touching the area near my severed hair. It was definitely more intimate than his usual touch.
“Reconciliation is something people who used to get along do. Robenin and I have never been like that.”
“The trick to dealing with the young lord is simply not to touch him first. It’s not difficult, and you can do it.”
-Even if I warn her, she’ll definitely touch him again soon.
His words and his true feelings were completely different right now.
I looked up at Ash with a knowing stare. How did he know me so well?
“If you want to avoid him, just ignore him no matter what he suggests. No matter how it looks, he won’t recklessly charge in if the other party doesn’t allow it.”
“That mad dog?”
“It’s true. He may challenge anyone to a duel… but he waits if they refuse. Even though he seems like a wild animal, he is still the son of a noble house with proper breeding. He maintains the minimum level of courtesy.”
When I thought about it quietly, he was right.
Ten years ago, when I had won the children’s division at Quiponcobe, Robenin had won the youth division.
And he had challenged me to a duel. When I ignored him, he dragged the emperor into it to fight me, but at least he hadn’t rudely swung his sword out of nowhere.
There was no excusing how aggressively he came at me, but it was true that he had formally requested a duel.
“Now that you mention it… I guess that’s true. Same this time. If he really wanted to fight Count Trenpe, he could have just attacked him anywhere without turning it into a spectacle at Tombdra.”
“So keep it in mind. You must never provoke him first.”
-She definitely will.
I had read his inner thoughts, but Ash’s eyes were already filled with distrust toward me. That was why he was repeating himself so earnestly.
“…Ash. How do you know me so well?”
“Because I like you.”
“Really?”
“I pay attention. I’m always interested in you. So I can’t help but know.”
He looked endlessly gentle, but Ash was an incredible man.
To think he had taught me that having my cheek stroked could feel so good.
-I should warn the young lord again too. Neither of them listens after being told once. I’ll just have to brainwash them until they listen, even if it’s annoying.
He also clearly knew how to handle people like me and Robenin.
“Fine. I’ll keep it in mind.”
“Promise me.”
“I probably won’t keep it anyway?”
“…I’m not sure if I should call that having a conscience or not having one.”
Probably the latter.
I leaned against Ash with a relaxed expression, then, feeling a little bad for worrying him so much, spoke in a pleasant voice to reassure him.
“Don’t worry too much. I do consider my physical condition before I cause trouble.”
“That doesn’t reassure me at all. That just means you’ll cause trouble once your body gets better… Plus, you’ve already coughed up blood in front of me twice.”
“…Wasn’t it once?”
“Looks like you forgot about what happened ten years ago.”
Ah, I had coughed up blood back when I escaped the slave market too. But both then and now, I was the only one who could do anything, so it had been an unavoidable choice.
Most people would love themselves more and take better care of their bodies. There probably weren’t many people who hated annoying tasks as much as I did.
It was then that Ash’s eyes, which had been touching my face, narrowed.
He stopped stroking my cheek, traced the area under my eyes with his thumb, then slowly pulled away. I felt a little disappointed.
“You look tired. You should rest now.”
“Do I look that bad?”
“Not exactly, but… your complexion is poor. Go in first.”
“What about you, Ash? Are you going somewhere?”
“I think I need to go see the young lord again. There are still things I need to ask of him, and I’m worried about his injuries. If I leave him like that, he definitely won’t even disinfect them… He’s careless with his own body in a way that reminds me of someone.”
The way he looked at me with cloudy eyes made it clear that “someone” was me.
Ash seemed to think Robenin and I had a lot in common, and the more I observed Robenin up close, the more I had no choice but to admit it.
“Do as you like. I’m tired, so I’m going to sleep early.”
“Make sure you take the internal injury medicine too. I know you keep forgetting it. That’s why you get tired so easily.”
“…Nagging at me while you’re going off to meet another man!”
“It’s not like I feel good about leaving you alone to go to the young lord. I know you don’t like him… and I’m sorry that I can’t just leave him be.”
“That doesn’t matter. I’m not so narrow-minded that I’d stop you from visiting a friend. I do wonder why you’d treat someone you’re eventually going to kill, but that’s your business.”
Our prince really was kind. No wonder he was called the mother bird of the imperial family—he even took care of a wandering mad dog.
As I headed into the inn alone, I spoke up before I got too far from Ash.
“I hate Robenin, but I don’t hate that he’s on your side. He’s crazy, but he seems to know how to judge people, so I’ll at least acknowledge that one thing.”
I hadn’t said anything particularly positive about Robenin, yet Ash smiled with a face full of joy, as if he had been the one praised.
Sigh, how could he smile so beautifully?
He was so pure it felt like my soul was being purified. If he smiled with his real face, it would probably purify my eyes too.
Ash stood at the inn entrance and watched until I crossed the lobby and climbed the stairs.
Now that I thought about it, he had simply come to escort me to the inn.
Did he have something to talk about with Robenin alone?
What could they possibly discuss without me?
Harboring that question as I climbed the stairs, Rai started chattering beside me.
“What?”
This inn allowed pets in the rooms for an extra fee, so Rai remained in his wolf form.
Everyone seemed to think he was just a rather handsome large dog.
Rai had no brain. It was completely filled with metal.
As I spoke, I realized it was actually one of the ways I could truly defeat Robenin.
Fighting in a lake or ocean full of water would be like having my weapons all around me. Just skipping the effort of summoning water would give me a huge advantage in both speed and structure.
As a Spirit Master, I was at a clear disadvantage against Robenin.
It wasn’t that I was weak.
He was absurdly strong, which made me look relatively weak by comparison.
To beat him, I had to secure even the slightest advantageous condition first.
I needed to know Robenin’s weaknesses, but I refused to look like his stalker.