Chapter 5: Shamanism
"Hoo... hoo... You okay now, Aris? Should I go chew out Anna unnie for you? Huh?"
"Ugh... I'm fine. Doesn't hurt anymore. Don't fight... I hate it when you do..."
I was actually pretty startled. It had happened way faster than I'd expected. And for it to manifest in actual action like that? This was truly beyond anything I'd anticipated.
Was it already festering that badly deep down? Hmm... If things went according to my plan, I remembered having a good few years of safety margin ahead. But this pace is too quick. You've got real potential for combustion, Anna unnie...! This little sister is impressed!!
When she grabbed my head so hard it nearly crushed, I got a clear look at Anna unnie's eyes. Dark, lifeless pupils. It's a stretch, but if what she'd been holding there hadn't been a pen but a knife instead—what then?
"I like Remi unnie~"
"Seriously... I was so shocked when I heard you crying while we were just walking by."
"Hehe~ Sorry..."
It was just a fleeting imagining, but my mouth had already curved into a grin. Not wanting anyone to see, I buried my face in Remi's chest.
But not yet. Not yet.
In this vast world, no one mourns the death of a stranger they never knew. Why? Because they're others. People they've never laid eyes on. Not family. Not precious.
Only when I've become someone more precious to them than anyone else—only when I've reached a position nothing can replace—that's when I want to die.
I am a devotee of tragedy, harboring the wish that my life be written as one grand tragic tale. I have no desire to be the protagonist of some banal, ordinary story—like a roadside beggar freezing to death in the cold—with no fun, no emotion, no lesson, nothing at all.
That would be utter despair.
Far better to slowly wither away in this peaceful daily life.
Tap tap. I tugged at Remi's sleeve. She looked down at me. Remi really is so pretty, I always think. She'd be even prettier crying.
"Let's go to my room."
"Huh...?"
"I saved some snacks... to eat together..."
I trailed off as I said it. It was a reward for the game of hide-and-seek earlier. Cookies handmade with care by a top-class chef—nothing polarizing about them. But they didn't really move me. My sense of taste is pretty dull. Back then, I was so numb I didn't even realize I'd lost it.
The only things that registered were spicy peppers or pepper—barely enough to feel something. If I had to describe it, it wasn't taste so much as raw sensation.
That's why I don't get too attached to snacks. Honestly, if you blindfolded me, I probably couldn't tell the difference between mud cookies and the ones the chefs bake. Crunchy, crumbs falling to the floor. Yeah, pretty similar.
Actually, it's not just taste—my whole body's senses are a bit off. Well, can't be helped. Maybe my mind cracked from all the repeated deaths, or perhaps it's some disconnect between soul and flesh? Who knows.
I don't want to know. Wouldn't help anyway.
What matters to me is the now.
Anyway, that's why I'd secretly stash the snacks I got and offer them up to Remi unnie, who loves cookies. Mom's already full just looking at them.
"...Yeah! Come on, let's hurry and eat them together!"
"Unnie... you'll get fat."
"Eek! D-don't poke!"
I poked her soft, squishy side, savoring the feel as we headed to my room. Hmm... she really might gain weight at this rate... unnie. Should I make her exercise...? Cut back on snacks...?
Oh, right—that face Anna unnie made. It was perfect. Someone must've done something to her. To my unnie, no less. The nerve.
Later, maybe I should look into it properly. If I catch 'em, I'll give 'em a thumbs-up. Stamp a big "Great Job!" right on their face.
I've wandered countless worlds so far. There were classic fantasy realms teeming with dragons and elves, fun places where demons and gods walked openly among us. Worlds where humans dominated everything, enslaving other races—and ones where humans were nearly wiped out in turn.
Beyond that, absolute monarchies centered on imperial power, feudal worlds where lords held immense sway, republics born from successful revolutions. Even similar worldviews had their fine details all jumbled differently.
"Books... on shamanism?"
"Yeah! I'm curious! I wanna see!"
"Heh... You're one quirky princess, Your Highness."
"Hehe~"
I'd come to the library. Tessa the librarian greeted me warmly on sight. I love her sea-blue hair—it reminds me of the ocean—so I often ask if I can touch it. Even smells faintly like the sea.
At first, she freaked out knowing I was a princess, bowing deeply. But over the years, we've gotten so close she's practically dropped all formalities.
Well, you can't sweat every little thing, or you'd never enjoy life. The world's meant to be lived easygoing.
"Shamanism... Well, if it's you, Princess, no issue. Over there~ far left end."
"Okay! Thanks, Tessa~"
Amusingly, this world had no fireball-slinging, sky-rending mages. Shame—mages are fantasy staples, right? Instead, there were shamanists who made it their trade.
Think of them as wizards specializing in curses and enchantments. Their reputation's in the gutter, but their utility makes them indispensable even to the state.
Shamanism. Anna unnie's sudden change. Too big a gap to chalk up to my miscalculation. How many times do you think I've died in front of others so far—?
To script a tragedy, grasping others' emotions is key above all. Not to brag, but I'm confident reading people. Entertainment types trip me up sometimes—the wavelengths don't align—but Anna unnie's behavior doesn't touch my weak spots.
Yandere routes are the worst... They wreck everything...
So, yeah. Something's there.
"Shamanism... mental branch... last one. Chapter 14. Hm."
A girl researching mental shamanism in the dim library corner... Quite the rare sight.
Honestly, I don't think skimming a book or two will make me a shamanism expert. Not reading any is scary, but reading just one? That's the real terror, or so they say.
Still, I should find some clue.
What I'm after: shamanism causing sudden personality shifts—negative ones. Sure, it helped me, but by public standards, it's twisting character for the worse.
Flip flip. Pages keep turning.
"Manipulation... more like inducement, or subconscious. Hypnosis takes too long—pass."
Names call it shamanism, but it all ties into the unreal: magic, whatever. Easy enough to parse.
Wasn't a new trait or action. Anna unnie did resent me—and it boiled over into violence.
So, surfacing the subconscious? Or amplifying emotional swings to block rational thought?
Rational thought...
"Unnie's the heir apparent at this rate."
Obviously. Eldest princess—that seals the throne.
Remi unnie, second-born, lounges around with zero ambition for it. Me? Too young.
Plenty of reason to target Anna unnie, then. This incident probably wasn't aimed at me. No motive, no gain.
Side effect, more like. Some idiot plotting to shake her mind and mold her to their taste.
And I got swept up.
"Hng... Boring..."
"Princess Aris? What, done already?"
"Yeah..."
Thud. I handed the book back to Tessa and left the library.
Really, no thrill, no fun.
—Mental shamanism is high-difficulty by nature, tough to cast. Not a one-and-done; needs constant infusion via a medium kept close. Underwear, clothes, jewelry.
"Hm, that must be it."
Heard a certain duke recently gifted her black pearl earrings. She seems to like them—wears them on her right ear often.
No detection means it started as a normal pair, swapped later for the cursed one.
Slowly conditioning her immature young mind, bit by bit.
Tough luck. Unnie's mine first.
If the duke didn't predict this, she's even more fragile than he thinks. Cracks already showing.
At this rate, exposure's just a matter of time.
Hmm.
"Ugh..."
Recalculating.
My prodding from the side, plus the mind-shaking shamanism? My jumbled memories have scenarios like this—not rare, even ones I've exploited.
Tag: Mind Break. Pure gold.
Original timeline was about five years... Hm... One to two? Could be as short as one if it accelerates.
Time till explosion.
Boom~!
"Heehee!"
Oh man, this'll be fun. Turning the unexpected into script.
That's the mark of a pro director.
So, how shall I cook this up?