Acting Cute
"Next question! I know you're probably sick of hearing it, but I simply can't not ask. How does it feel to have become the youngest Best Actor winner in history?"
I lifted the corners of my mouth into a soft smile.
"It's hard to believe, honestly. Everything is, really. Even now it feels strange that I'm on TV."
"Oh my, you can't still be feeling awkward after all this time~! It's been quite a while since your debut, you know!"
The woman conducting the interview had been unfailingly bright from start to finish. Her sunny expression only faltered after she glanced down at the script clutched in her hands. She hesitated for a moment, then wore a look of helpless apology.
"The next question is… about something that's been making the rounds online lately, regarding your elementary school days…"
"Ah."
"I'm so sorry. It's an uncomfortable topic, isn't it? We can skip it."
I shook my head at her stricken face, as if it were nothing at all, with a light smile to match.
"I've heard about it too. The rumor that I was bullied in elementary school. It's been somewhat exaggerated, but it's not entirely without basis."
"Really?"
"I got hurt a lot when I was young. To a slightly… abnormal degree, I suppose."
I answered calmly, recalling the words I'd prepared in advance. Since the interview itself had been arranged at CEO Jang's request, everything felt like a pre-written script.
He really is good at his job.
CEO Jang's competence exceeded anything I'd imagined. Even the woman in front of me was famous for putting interviewees at ease, I'd heard—and she was certainly living up to it right now.
But how on earth did he handle Oh Seung-hyun?
The moment I'd fallen asleep, I'd gone straight to An-gae. As usual, he'd wrapped me in his arms immediately, but the instant I asked to see Oh Seung-hyun's day, he'd frozen.
…?
When I tilted my head at the unexpected reaction, An-gae's lips wriggled, as though troubled.
What's wrong? Why are you acting cute?
I'm not acting cute….
Then what's the matter?
It's… Yeonjae! It all worked out really well! Just like that CEO person said, super cleanly! You can trust me on this! So couldn't we just leave it here, you and me?
Why are you being like this too? What exactly did you do? Was it gruesome?
No matter how much I pressed after that, An-gae refused to show me the memory. When I demanded to know why, all I got back in response was the petulant insistence, I'll protect you too! I can do that too!
It's frustrating, but… I don't know. I'm sure he handled it fine.
Frankly, it wouldn't have mattered even if An-gae hadn't dealt with Oh Seung-hyun properly. What could that kid possibly do, anyway? Writing posts on the internet meant nothing to me.
Unless the fans got upset about it, I suppose.
For a moment I'd worried that rumors of me being bullied might clash with my "Bambi" image and disappoint my fans—but it turned out to be needless worry. The fan cafe was filled, as always, with nothing but declarations of love. I combed through the community boards too and found nothing unusual.
Enough. Stop dwelling on it.
It nagged at me a little, but I could trust CEO Jang's skills by now.
Oh Seung-hyun ends here.
Having settled it in my head, I nodded—just as the woman moved on to her next question.
"Things have been in an uproar since Director Yoon Kang-yeon posted that message a few days ago. Since this is your first interview since then, our subscribers must be dying to know. If it's not too intrusive—how did you feel when you read the director's post?"
I smiled at her carefully chosen words.
"Honestly, I was puzzled. The director apologized to me right away at the time, and he apologized several more times after that. So I never expected him to post something separately."
"Oh my, then you must have been quite surprised as well."
"So I went straight to the director's studio, and he apologized again the moment I walked in. I practically had to beg him to stop apologizing."
I laughed, deliberately keeping the atmosphere light. The woman caught my intent at once and laughed along with me.
"As someone who read the post myself… I think I understand why the director did it. Still, I'm relieved to see you looking well. I'm sure the fans will worry a great deal less now, too."
Good. Perfect timing.
Suppressing a satisfied smile, I brought up what I'd been wanting to say the whole time.
"I'm happy and healthy right now. There are so many people around me who cherish me… and above all, Biyeon is right here beside me. That alone makes me truly happy. So if there's anyone who's worried about me…"
I'd meant to say I hope you won't, but it sounded too negative, and I hesitated. After weighing my words for a moment, this was what came out instead.
"…I'd love it if you loved me even more instead?"
"……"
"……"
The room went silent. I closed my eyes.
"……I'm so sorry."
"Pfft—no, no, not at all! Haha! That was adorable!"
"That came out wrong… yes. This part… you can't edit it out, can you?"
The woman beamed brightly and replied that no, I could not.
I'm ruined.
My ears burned. No matter how hard I clenched my hands, I knew I couldn't hide the red spreading across them, which only drove more blood to my face.
After a few more questions, the interview came to an end. A second interview conducted the same day was equally gentle and calm throughout.
But when I returned from work and went back to school, something entirely contrary to that peace was waiting for me.
"Seojin. Is it my imagination, or are all the kids looking only at me?"
I asked again, half convinced I'd come down with a fresh case of celebrity sickness—but sadly, Baek Seojin shook her head.
"Nope. They're all staring at you."
"I see."
Why, though? Even when I came back from winning an award at the Cannes Film Festival, I'd never gotten looks like these.
The gazes I'd received from my classmates all this time had carried a clear sense of distance. It was almost like awe—as if they were looking at a member of some other species entirely. But what I felt now was thick with something impure.
Why has that kid been staring at me since earlier?
Especially the eyes of a few of the bigger boys—they were grating on my nerves.
Fine, I'll just go ask them why they're staring.
I figured I ought to at least learn the reason; the suspense was unbearable, so I started to rise from my seat. Baek Seojin shoved me back down, her face drained white.
"Yeonjae, I know you're angry. But for now, let's avoid a confrontation as much as possible."
"Huh? Why would I be angry?"
I asked in genuine confusion, and Baek Seojin's expression suddenly turned resolute.
"If you step up, this gets bigger. They might start writing posts about you. You absolutely cannot get involved. I'm already handling the worst ones on my end anyway."
"Seojin. I don't understand what you're saying right now."
I asked what on earth she was talking about, but Baek Seojin only repeated the same answer.
"Just stay here for now! I'm going to go yell at that kid to stop staring, and then I'll be back."
"No, wait—"
Before I could get a word in, she shot off like a bullet. The sight of her marching over to the kid who was staring at me and barking at them really did make her look like an enraged Maltese. Startled by the ferocity, the kids scattered naturally, like a crowd dispersing on cue.
As I stood there gawping at the incomprehensible scene, Seo Jio, who had been sitting quietly beside me all this while, laughed.
"It's because of your rumor."
"My rumor?"
"Yeah. The one about you being bullied in elementary school. You know how kids our age are—desperate for gossip. Most of them are still immature, so it can't be helped."
Murmuring this, Seo Jio sounded remarkably unlike a middle schooler. Honestly, he was another old soul in a kid's body.
I asked, puzzled.
"What does me being bullied have to do with them?"
"Nothing at all. But now there are kids who think you're an easier target than before, and kids who pity you. Funny, isn't it? Acting as if they're somebody."
It was funny. Really, don't they have anything better to do?
"It's fine. Well—people are capable of all kinds of emotions."
Being stared at like that was ridiculous, but there was nothing a few glances could do to me anyway. I'd said it in that spirit, but Seo Jio's brow creased slightly.
"Yeonjae. You have a tendency to think about other people's feelings a little too much."
"Huh?"
"This is society. You're free to feel whatever you want, but whispering and gawking that openly isn't normal behavior. Don't try to embrace kids like that too."
He was clearly wearing a loose smile, yet somehow he looked oddly fierce.
"There are far too many people who just open their mouths and dump whatever's in their heads without a second thought."
"……"
"It seems to be getting worse these days, regardless of age… but you don't have to be kind to people who don't deserve the courtesy."
Seo Jio looked at the gathered students the way one might regard trash lying on the side of the road.
Wow, he really does have a nasty streak too.
The murderous look in his eyes left me speechless, but I answered anyway.
"Okay. I'll keep that in mind."
"Good. A stray cat has to think of itself before it thinks of anyone else if it wants to survive. Act too selflessly, and even your own sleeping spot gets taken."
Where had this stray cat business suddenly come from?
I just turned my head away from the nonsense. And so a long stretch of silence passed between us.
"Yeonjae."
"Yeah?"
"Do you know Seojin's being bullied?"
It was abrupt, but not an unexpected topic.
"She was being bullied? I just thought she didn't have any girlfriends."
I knew Baek Seojin barely spoke to anyone outside our trio of me, Seo Jio, and Noh Bihyuk. But had that counted as bullying?
"Of course, everyone draws the line around bullying differently, so it might not look that way to you."
"Does it look that way to you?"
"Yeah. At the very least, that's how Seojin feels about it."
As far as I knew, Baek Seojin had never been subjected to violence of any kind, verbal or otherwise. With the three of us around, she always had someone to eat lunch with and someone to talk to. In that sense, there was no grounds for a lawsuit over school violence… but being ostracized was a different matter.
Right. I was bullied in elementary school too.
At this belated reminder of the fact, I nodded slowly.
"Hearing you say it, I think you're right. It must be really hard on Seojin."
"Well, one girl hanging around three boys. That's what gets the talk going."
"…? What does that have to do with any of them?"
I asked in genuine bewilderment, and Seo Jio burst out laughing.
"Haha! I literally just said it. It has nothing to do with them. None whatsoever. But with people like that, it's easier to just assume they have no brains. That's what I told Seojin, too."
"And what did Seojin say?"
"Said she'd keep it in mind. She's not exactly mentally fragile by nature, so she'll hold up fine."
On the surface it sounded indifferent, but considering Seo Jio's personality, it was more than enough meddling on his part.
So the two of them really are close, huh.
Still, I wasn't particularly curious about how or why the two of them had become friends. Baek Seojin hadn't asked me for help directly, so what good would it do for me to intervene? So I just let one remark slip out: "I hope things work out for her."
"……Yeonjae. I know this is a bother, but can I ask you one more thing?"
"What is it?"
After a brief pause, Seo Jio asked.
"What if it hadn't been Seojin I brought up? What if I'd told you it was Bihyuk being bullied instead?"
"Bihyuk?"
For a split second, I nearly dropped the mechanical pencil I was holding.
Noh Bihyuk, treated like that.
What would I do? Isn't it obvious?
I'd grab the ringleader and end it. Permanently.
As I was thinking this, Seo Jio, who had been studying my face intently, murmured under his breath.
"Hmm… that's a much bigger difference than I expected."
Difference?
Even when I gave him a puzzled look, Seo Jio simply stayed quiet for a long while. Then, without warning, he leaned forward and laid himself across the desk.
"Yeonjae."
Seo Jio pressed one cheek against my desk and gazed up at me.
I spoke with utmost courtesy.
"I'm sorry, but could you change your position? I don't know why exactly, but I'm finding it a little unpleasant."
"No can do. I'm in the middle of acting cute right now."
"Right. Which is probably why I find it unpleasant."
Wondering if I'd been too tactful, I was about to put it more plainly when Seo Jio smiled, loose and unhurried.
"Yeonjae. Could you go a little easy on me?"
"What are you talking about?"
"I like you. Or, to be a little more precise—I like your acting."
"…?"
So? What was I supposed to do about that?