Closer Than They Appear
Only silence swept through the phone.
I was just about to backtrack, wondering if I'd been too blunt.
―At first, I was.
The voice was calmer than I'd expected, and I hesitated.
―You've been famous since first year, so of course I knew who you were. But there was never a chance to get close to you… ha, no. Actually, if I'm being honest, I didn't talk to you because of your rumors. I figured, why bother?
"……"
―Then I heard you'd been in a drama, and I thought, ah, so he can become a celebrity too. That's when I started acting friendly with you. That part's true.
It was a story I already knew well. One I'd predicted.
So it shouldn't have been any shock at all. And yet—honestly, what was this feeling?
―At first I didn't think much of it. I figured I'd just get reasonably chummy with you and manage my connections… that was the whole plan.
"I know. I knew that too."
―Yeah. I could tell. Honestly, I'd have thought the same in your shoes. It was written all over me.
The words that spilled out after that were relentless and fluent.
As if he'd rehearsed them a dozen times over.
―Even I know my motives were too ugly… I know whatever I say now won't sound convincing. But I just—I wanted to say that's not who I am anymore.
Strange. Beneath that steady tone, I could read emotions trembling.
Noh Bihyeok was shaking like a leaf in the steadiest voice I had ever heard from him.
―I swear I never really cared about your rumors, and I wasn't curious, not even a little. And then when the urge to ask finally came… I couldn't bring myself to do it.
"……"
―I know it's hypocritical. Hanging around you, soaking up every opportunity that came my way, pretending not to know anything… and now, after all that, going I'm worried about you? It's a joke, right?
I listened to that self-mocking voice, then said quietly,
"It's not that funny."
―…That's only because you're too kind.
You're the type who gets scammed easily, so watch out—the words slid over light as a joke.
But the anxiety wrapped up in that casual laughter came through undiluted.
Which made my mood even stranger.
If the guy were any good at acting, I might have doubted him at least a little.
Can I trust you?
Behind trust lies nothing but disappointment. Which meant I shouldn't trust him at all.
And yet, dodging a sincere apology would be nothing more than childish behavior on my part, too.
In the end, this was as far as my answer could go.
"Thank you for being honest with me. Even this late."
―Yeah…
I couldn't bring myself to say that I believed him.
Noh Bihyeok had clearly picked up on that too, because he didn't press any further.
I was staring blankly at the silent phone when a question burst out of me.
"So when you got jealous of Seo Jio—was that because you thought it'd mean fewer opportunities for you?"
―Wow…. So that's the image I had with you.
The voice that came back was bitter.
―No. I mean, no. It was just—what I wrote in that essay was exactly what I felt.
"…? So it was the anxiety of feeling like your spot as a close friend was being taken?"
―…I expected way too much emotional intelligence from you. Yes. That's it. Nailed it. Happy now?
His playful feel better yet? was steeped in self-blame and self-loathing.
It was an emotion I knew all too well, so when Noh Bihyeok suggested wrapping up the call, I let out a sigh.
"Noh Bihyeok."
―Yeah?
"Get over to my place. Right now."
―…Huh?
"Bring your school uniform. We're going to school together tomorrow. Hanging up."
I couldn't trust Noh Bihyeok.
But I couldn't just leave him to drown in it, either.
I'm exactly the same as Noh Bihyeok.
Every once in a while, I ended up in the passenger seat of a car, and every time, the writing on the side mirror caught my eye.
Objects in mirror are closer than they appear.
Books are full of sayings about how life never goes the way you plan. You think you're keeping a clean, deliberate distance from someone, and then one day it all comes flooding in at once—because that's what human relationships do.
If Noh Bihyeok's explanation was right, then he'd done exactly that. And above all, so had I.
Because it's true that my feelings toward Noh Bihyeok have changed.
Whether his original reason for approaching me was impure or not, I'd received his apology for it.
And the two of us were now watching out for each other more than we had at the start.
For tonight, that's enough.
This was no night for lofty words like trust or friendship.
It was enough to just lie there and trade the stories we'd been putting off.
"Seojin! Hey."
"Hey! Yeonjae… whoa. You look exhausted. Did you not sleep?"
"I got maybe three hours?"
"What? How come?"
I'd spent the whole night talking with Noh Bihyeok, who had shown up at my door wearing the hangdog expression of a kid freshly scolded by his parents.
Since I'd gone to bed four hours later than usual, I'd braced myself for the Fog to grumble at me.
Instead, the Fog had wrapped me in a surprisingly warm embrace. I already missed it.
"Bihyeok and I made up."
"Ahh… tsk, shame."
I laughed at the genuine disappointment on Baek Seojin's face.
And right on cue, the man himself made his entrance.
"You were trash-talking me just now, weren't you."
"Whoa, what the— you haven't been in our class for ages."
"Figured I'd just do whatever I feel like from now on~"
Noh Bihyeok flashed a grin and shamelessly plopped down into a seat.
It was nice to see him energetic as always.
It would have been nicer if the seat he'd chosen weren't mine. Move…
"Hey, Yeonjae."
And then the third party in question, Seo Jio, arrived.
"Oh, Bihyeok's here too. Did you two make up?"
"Yep."
It was Noh Bihyeok who spoke first, to Seo Jio as he smiled at the news.
"Hey. Sorry for glaring at you back then. And for being so childish about everything after, too."
"……"
Seo Jio kept his smile in place, stared at the outstretched hand for a beat, then took it.
"Fine. Apology accepted."
"Still don't like you, though."
At Noh Bihyeok's snickering parting shot, Seo Jio burst out laughing.
"Haha! Wow, thank god. Because I really can't stand you either."
What are you two even doing. Seriously.
From a distance it looked like two friends shaking hands warmly, but the eyes glaring over the joined hands had real bite to them.
And the veins standing out on their forearms made it clear exactly how much force each of them was squeezing with.
They're both such children.
I was shaking my head and getting on with my own business when Baek Seojin clicked her tongue beside me.
"Unbelievable. Absolutely unhinged."
"…!"
The familiar turn of phrase made me flinch.
"…Seojin."
"Yeah?"
"Do you still keep in touch with Ha-eun?"
"Of course! We hung out, just the two of us, last weekend!"
So that's where it came from.
I nodded slowly at Baek Seojin's beaming face.
"Your speech patterns are starting to sound identical."
"Really? I always thought Ha-eun's way of talking was adorable. Oh—wait, was that your roundabout way of calling me adorable?"
I just laughed as Baek Seojin squirmed, sputtering that you can't just say stuff like that out loud to people.
Park Ha-eun…, she really is a force of nature.
I silently prayed that Baek Seojin would inherit anything from Park Ha-eun except her devotion to tteokbokki.
"Yeonjae, you can change into this one next!"
"Got it. Thank you."
I took the clothes a staff member handed me and headed into the dressing room.
Aren't these shorts a little too short?
I eyed the white short-sleeve shirt and navy shorts dubiously.
Even from the crisply saturated color of the fabric, summer practically radiated off them.
It's still April.
It felt far too early, but I was in no position to complain.
The moment I came out in the new outfit, people swarmed around me.
Hands ran through my hair, dabbed something onto my face—I absorbed the familiar bustle without thinking—when a staffer tidying my clothes suddenly cried out.
"Oh? You've got a scar on your thigh?"
"Yes. I hurt it a long time ago. Will that be a problem?"
"Not at all! Something like that covers up completely with concealer. Don't worry."
One of the staff stepped in and dabbed product onto my thigh.
A few light pats, and the faint scar had vanished entirely.
"Ta-da! Like it was never there, right?"
"That's amazing. Thank you."
"Oh, it's nothing. This one's easy!"
"They say if someone else's work looks easy, it means they're really good at it. I don't think I could ever do it that smoothly, even with a lesson."
The staffer grinned sheepishly and mumbled, "It really is nothing, though…"
This was only my second photoshoot, so I'd been a little nervous, but the set had a warm, easygoing atmosphere overall.
Completely different from the first one.
The photographer I'd worked with back then had eyes full of madness.
Whether he was high-strung by nature or not, the sight of him snapping at the staff nonstop hadn't been pleasant either.
Thankfully, today's photographer was unfailingly gentle and courteous.
He'd been chatting and laughing with the junior staffer, and now he came over.
"Yeonjae, does the outfit fit well? Anything uncomfortable?"
"No, it's fine. Though I had makeup put on my thigh, and I'm a little worried it might get on the clothes."
"Ah, don't worry about that. It's our house brand product anyway."
What a relief. I was getting up to resume shooting when the photographer added,
"When did you get the scar?"
"Elementary school. Third grade, I think."
"Good thing it's somewhere not too visible. Judging by how it's still there, it must have been a pretty bad cut."
At the note of concern in his voice, I simply gave a soft smile.
It wasn't a story worth spilling in exhaustive detail.
Though I had told the whole thing, every last bit, the night I'd rushed Noh Bihyeok over to my place.
I still don't know how he'd held in that mountain of curiosity for so long—he'd interrogated me so relentlessly there was no dodging it.
Wait, what kind of lunatic just leaves that kind of thing lying around on a school field?
Well, at least it didn't take a chunk out of me.
At least my ass. Are you actually okay right now? Let me see it.
My elementary school gym teacher couldn't stand seeing kids sitting still.
The boys had to play soccer, the girls had to play dodgeball, and naturally that included me.
I'd been planning to just half-heartedly participate, was shuffling around the field, tripped over something—and opened my eyes in a hospital bed.
Looking back, a construction part being on the field was pretty bizarre.
It had pierced deep into a sharp spot, so I needed stitches.
After that incident, playing on the field was banned for a while, and I remember the rumors about me getting even uglier because of it.
Well, on the bright side, the teacher excused me from PE after that.
Obviously you should get excused, if you're thinking straight. Wait, the school just let that slide? Are they out of their minds?
Bihyeok, watch your language. The gym was under renovation back then, remember? It probably flew or rolled out from there.
Dude, seriously? Does that make any sense to you?
It had been a chaotic night, mostly spent trying to restrain Noh Bihyeok from combusting on the spot.
The matter had already been closed when the construction company covered my surgery bills.
By around that age, I'd already started building the habit of just going along with things, so back then I honestly hadn't been curious about the cause either.
Well, that was probably the Misfortune Factor at work, too.
I thought again how glad I was to have met the Fog.
If I hadn't, I wouldn't be able to lie around chatting comfortably with Noh Bihyeok like this.
I miss the Fog.
Once this photoshoot was done, today's schedule would be completely wrapped up.
And this was the last outfit, at that.
Hang in there a little longer.
I'd just double-checked my pose reference and was about to head onto the set when Jinbae hurriedly called me over.
"Yeonjae! We just got a call from Kang Sehyun."
"From Sehyun-hyung?"
What on earth could this be about?
It was the first contact since the burner phone. Had something happened?
After asking the photographer for a moment, I picked up the call.
"Hello?"
―Yeonjae. I'm so, so sorry for calling out of nowhere, but—do you happen to have time tomorrow?
"Tomorrow? What's this about?"
The voice of singer Kang Sehyun was brimming with awkwardness and trouble.
Just as my brow began to furrow in sympathy, a small voice came through.
―The thing is…