My Name is 'Misa' -3- The Memory Ricardo Witnesses

My name is 'Misa' -3- Within the memory that Ricardo sees. I glanced slyly at Mihail's eyes.

"What...?"

Mihail's pupils, filled with confusion, soon began to brim with anger.

"How do you know that name?"

"Because I'm that person..."

I said it in Mihail's trembling voice.

"Shut up..."

Mihail demanded to know how I could possibly know the name of a memory no one else shared. He roared louder than when he'd been hurt, unleashing raw emotion without restraint.

"Don't you dare speak of my memories with that filthy mouth."

The me in the memory wore an awkward smile, looking troubled as if I didn't know what to do. It was my first time encountering someone denying their own identity, after all.

Watching that, I let out a bitter sigh and shook my head. Was I really that important to Mihail? I had just been his friend, yet here he was, remembering the me from those memories so vividly. It made me grateful but awkward at the same time.

'This is tricky.'

The me in the memory spoke to Mihail in a calm voice, as if it were no big deal.

"I'm grateful that you remember me like that."

"Shut up."

"I didn't think you'd still remember me after all this time."

Guess I really am me, after all. We even thought the same thing. I let out a hollow chuckle and shook my head.

There was one thing I'd been curious about for a long time. Once I revealed the truth to Mihail, how would he see me? A lifesaver? A long-lost classmate? Honestly, I didn't expect him to warm up to me. In my mind, I wasn't that big a presence in his life. Just my perspective, though.

What intrigued me most was my own reaction. I barely knew myself. Would I laugh openly about the past, or lash out at Mihail over buried grudges? Even I wasn't sure how I'd respond if that moment came.

The me in the memory finally opened my tightly shut mouth toward Mihail, who glared as if he wanted to kill me. Exhausted by the situation, I spoke to him in an irritated tone.

"I did my best, but you hate me so much, Mihail."

"...Who told you that name?"

"Again with that? Why can't you believe people?"

‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠

"Tell me."

"Hah..."

The me in the memory unleashed sharp words at the distrustful Mihail.

"I did everything I could for ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠you, Mihail."

"Don't dodge. Tell me straight."

"I tried to help you grow more comfortably, and I did my utmost not to cause you harm."

"...Ricardo!!!"

"I...!!!"

As I slowly spat out the truth, Mihail's face grew pale.

"That day, I held back the archbishop in your place...!"

"Please..."

"Even when I saved you from drifting down the river, I never heard a word of thanks, but I kept helping steadfastly. That was me."

"No... this isn't."

"Why were you disappointed in me?"

The me in the ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠memory shouted at Mihail amid the falling rain, swept up in emotion like a fool.

"Why is everything I do just showing off or wrong?"

"...No."

"Do you hate me that much?"

"..."

"Me, who helped without asking for anything...! Your childhood friend who was there with you—do you hate me that much?!"

"...That's not it. I thought you..."

"What am I to you? I suffered to keep the promise I made to protect you as a kid. Even when the academy was on fire, I went in worrying you might be there. Why do I have to hear you call me trash?"

I poured out my anguish in a desperate voice toward Mihail.

"When you called me trash for killing your friend, did I kill him because I wanted to? I'm human too. I have guilt. Sure, I'm trash, but still human."

"..."

"That 'friend' of yours was plotting to slit your throat from behind. Is protecting you a crime?"

"...Why."

"Why did I do it?"

More pent-up rage than I'd imagined poured from the me in the memory. Once the floodgates opened, I clenched my fists and vomited out the misunderstandings, the inner complaints festering unspoken.

"Because of the promise."

"..."

"To keep that damn promise. So you wouldn't suffer as much."

"..."

"You made the Young Lady suffer, and I hate you so much I want to punch you right now, but that's the promise I made. Fuck... A promise is something you keep once it's said. Like the one your mom made to you—I didn't want to break it."

"I didn't know."

"You didn't know! Why do you only hate me?"

I gave a wry smile watching the me in the memory. Grateful for the catharsis, but it wasn't exactly cool.

I bowed my head and muttered softly.

'Wasn't the language a bit too harsh?'

She's a lady, after all.

'You wouldn't get it.'

I chuckled dryly and nodded.

Mihail stood frozen, unable to say a word. Tears streamed down her cheeks, soaking the floor. She couldn't look straight at me.

Sobbing, she reached out a trembling hand to grab my sleeve.

"I... I'm... I'm the bad one. Someone who deserves to die... so."

"..."

The me in the memory dodged her reaching hand and declared the end of our bond, cursing that I wanted no more ties, pouring out harsh resentment.

"I don't want to be involved with you anymore."

"...Min-hyuk!!!"

"Don't call me."

"...Huh?"

"Just like you said to me. Don't call me with that mouth."

"Ah... ahh..."

Mihail chased after the departing me. Please don't go. Even stumbling over puddles, even with students staring and murmuring. She ran desperately to catch the me in the memory.

'...'

It didn't feel good. Seeing her ignored so coldly didn't bring relief. Maybe knowing she was a girl changed my view, but watching that desperate girl run after me felt harsh.

'Idiot.'

I shook my head at the steadfastly walking me. If I'd let anger take over then, that's what would've happened. I kept my mouth shut and held back my words.

The scene shifted. The memory continued showing Mihail alone in her dark room.

The rain stopped. The sun rose. The moon set. Days flipped on the calendar, but Mihail stayed holed up in her dorm, unmoving.

"I'm sorry..."

In the pitch-black darkness without light, hugging her knees, she spent her days worrying over someone who wouldn't come.

Sometimes, someone knocked on Mihail's door.

But Mihail stayed locked in her room, refusing to emerge.

"I'm trash..."

Mihail opened a notebook and wrote letters she sent off. Addressed to Ricardo. And to Lee Min-hyuk, the owner of her cherished memories. Apologies poured into letters that received no reply.

As she filled pages with unanswered letters, Mihail's darkness deepened.

-...The viewing ends.

They saw different futures. One man let out a deep sigh.

-Hah...

One woman writhed in unbearable sorrow.

-No. This isn't right...

Having glimpsed different futures, they harbored complex feelings. Love. Jealousy. Friendship. The score filled with emotions too vast for words ended the long sorrow not with a repeat but a period.

"..."

The two closed their eyes and sank into thought.

*

-Plip.

Rain fell.

-Plip-plip-plip.

Droplets gathered one by one in my open palm.

Walking the capital's streets, raindrops soaked into my shoulders and collar. I smiled faintly and opened my umbrella.

"Fuck."

I thought it was the wrong time to speak. Better to wait until I felt more settled, I decided. Choosing the best over the worst seemed wiser for a possessor's life.

"Whew."

For things that wouldn't happen, I smiled softly and strolled the capital's streets.

And then.

-...Beyond the carriage path stood a rain-soaked girl.

I chuckled lightly and walked toward her, holding the umbrella over her as I greeted her.

"Miss Misa."

"..."

"You'll catch a cold."

Mihail gazed at me endlessly.

"...I."

I cut her off with a smile.

"Sword."

"..."

"Come learn when you have time."

Her name is Misa.

And my friend.