Chapter 3: The Guard's Joyful Inspection Life (3)
Translator: RaidenTL
Chapter 3: The Guard's Joyful Inspection Life (3)
The wait wasn't long. A short while after I laid the unconscious Iruna down, the entrance crystal began to flicker.
I wondered what kind of excuses these attempted rapist-NTR bastards would spew. The moment they lost Iruna, they must have realized they were screwed, so they likely came up with some sort of plan.
Should I listen first and then crack their skulls? Or just skip straight to the cracking?
As I was weighing my options, the Baldy party appeared. All four of them were present. When I directed a murderous glare toward them, the lead Baldy flinched and bowed obsequiously.
"Hehe. Mr. Guard. Have you been well?"
"No."
Cold sweat began to bead on the Baldy’s hairless scalp. I wondered if my baton would slip if I struck him there. My hands itched to test it out.
Just as I tightened my grip on the baton in my right hand, the Baldy suddenly lunged at me. Did this bastard just try to assassinate a guard?
"Die! Die!!"
"Guegh! Mercy! Please spare me!"
"Spare us!"
Starting with the Baldy I’d just whacked on the head, the other three threw themselves onto the ground in a prostrate bow. I’d intended to knock him out in one blow, but I missed because of the sweat. No wonder he wasn't wearing a helmet; he’d sacrificed hair and defense to max out his evasion.
Annoyed, I gave him another whack. The Baldy began to blubber.
"We're sorry!"
"Then why did you do something you'd have to be sorry for? You pieces of shit, was attempted rape not enough? Now you're trying to murder a guard?"
"Huh?"
The Baldy looked up. His expression was irritating, so I gave him another one. With three red welts now blooming on his smooth head, the Baldy screamed in pain.
"No! That wasn't our intention at all!"
"Then what was it?"
"That, well, I was trying to give you this."
Even while being beaten, the Baldy opened the hand he had been clutching tightly. Inside were four 10-copper coins.
"How tragic."
Your financial situation, that is. Geum Taeyang handed over a whole silver coin just for me to look the other way on some condoms, but these bastards think they can settle a literal crime with a measly 40 copper coins?
Who do they think I am, some beggar? No, the more I think about it, the madder I get. 40 copper coins? If they split it four ways, that’s only 10 copper coins per person.
"Hehe. What’s so tragic, sir?"
"The fact that the public authority of this kingdom has fallen so low."
"Excuse me?"
No more talk. My furious baton spat fire.
"Guaaah! Why are you doing this?!"
"You bastards really think little of a guard, don't you? You commit a crime and then try to bribe your way out? Judging by your form, this isn't your first time! You heinous criminals!"
The Baldy gang didn't even dare to fight back as they took the beating. Of course, the baton of a guard carries a weight of authority that the likes of them could never hope to oppose.
It was a force that even strength capable of uprooting mountains or mana that could shake the heavens could not withstand. It was absolute, unbridled power.
Attempted rape? In an eroge world, that was a crime that would only get you a few months in prison. However, bribing a guard carried a minimum sentence of one year, and an attempted assassination was a hanging offense.
On the other hand, if a guard was caught taking a bribe, it usually ended with nothing more than a few months of docked pay. This was exactly why eroge guards were always taking bribes and abandoning their posts to have sex. It was the ultimate low-risk, high-reward lifestyle.
After finishing the beatdown, I looked down at the four criminals sprawled out like frogs. Ah... so this is the 'power' of an eroge guard. My own strength is truly terrifying.
"What are you doing?"
Just as I was about to strike a cool pose, I heard a familiar voice. Shit, if I get caught like this, it’ll be a permanent stain on my history. She didn't see everything, did she?
Serika, who had just opened the door, looked back and forth between me and the Baldies with an absurd expression.
"You've arrived, Captain Serika!"
"Uh-huh. And what is all this? No, wait. I don't even have to ask."
Serika stood silent for a moment, scanning the checkpoint. I felt a bit nervous. Did I go too far?
No. I was simply fulfilling my duties as a guard, so there was no reason to be nervous. Besides, a man has his pride. If I cower in front of a woman who’s destined to become a meat toilet soon, even the stray dogs in the street will laugh at me.
And Serika is a pretty 'by-the-book' Guard Captain.
According to the original game's setting, she’d likely find me commendable rather than scold me. Sure enough, Serika picked up the copper coins scattered on the floor and patted my shoulder.
"You caught some lowlifes trying to bribe you? Good job."
"Yes. And that's not all. When they realized the bribe wouldn't work, they attacked me."
"Really? And you suppressed them? Impressive."
"It was nothing..."
"You lying piece of—!!"
The Baldy, whom I thought was unconscious, lifted his head, so I kicked him in the jaw. A few teeth went flying and skittered across the floor.
"Hahaha! How refreshing! I like it. That's how a man should be. This is quite different from the reputation you had at the training camp."
"I was merely disciplining criminals who dared to violate the laws of the kingdom."
"Don't use such fancy words; it's confusing."
That was confusing? This bird-brained woman. Her intellect is as shallow as her chest is deep.
"But why did they try to bribe you in the first place?"
"Pardon?"
"There must be a reason they tried to bribe you before attacking."
This was tricky. If I told the truth, Serika would try to take Iruna away. Then the sex party I had planned for tonight would turn into a lonely, sad party of one.
"Umm..."
Perhaps disturbed by the noise, Iruna groaned and sat up. Bye-bye, my beautiful pussy. It looks like I won't be getting any tonight.
No, it's not too late. I have to talk my way through this and get her to my house somehow.
"Are you okay? You must have been very frightened."
I made the first move to prevent Serika from intervening. Iruna, who had been dazed, saw the Baldy party sprawled on the floor and clung to me in terror.
"Hieeeek!!"
"It's okay. I've suppressed the rapists. You're safe now."
"Mr. Guard..."
The sensation of her chest pressing against my abdomen was quite satisfying. I shouldn't be smiling, but a grin tugged at my lips anyway. Serika, watching us, let out a hollow laugh.
"I think I see what happened. Hey, are you alright?"
"Hiek!!"
"She's in bad shape. Should I take her to the clinic?"
"No. She's the hunter I was in charge of, so I'll take her myself."
Knowing Serika's personality, she wouldn't want to leave it to me. But I had to try. It's better than doing nothing and regretting it later.
As expected, Serika furrowed her brows.
"No. You did a good job, but you're still a man. She'll feel safer if I, a fellow woman, take her."
Serika reached out to grab Iruna, but her hand met only empty air. Avoiding her hand, Iruna clung to me like a cicada.
"N-no. I want the guard to take me."
Nice assist, Iruna! To think I was going to sleep-rape such a sweet girl. I feel a bit sorry now. I'll make sure your first time is gentle.
"Sma is a man, are you sure you're okay with that?"
"Yes. If it weren't for him, something terrible would have happened to me."
"What did he do to make you trust him so much?"
"He gave me a Return Scroll. He told me to use it in an emergency."
"A Return Scroll?"
I just took it out of the storage box under the desk; why was she so surprised?
"You bought that with your own money? That's impressive. I'm seeing a lot of new sides to you today."
Now it was my turn to be surprised. Does she really not know? Let me test the waters.
"Yes. I kept it in the box under the desk and then gave it to her."
"That box is usually empty, so it's a perfect place to store things. Anyway, since it's come to this, you'll have to take responsibility for her. Can you do that?"
She said 'can you do that,' but it was more like a threat that she'd kill me if I touched her. But I'm not a man so timid that I'd yield to a threat.
"Yes."
"Fine. I'll lock up here, so you take her to the clinic and then head home."
"Understood. Miss Iruna, it'll be hard to walk like that, so please take my hand."
"Ah! Yes. I'm sorry."
"Don't be sorry. It's no trouble at all. Oh, it'll be hard to walk around looking like that, so wear this."
"Thank you."
"Shall we go then?"
I supported Iruna as we left the checkpoint. I heard Serika calling out from behind us.
"Oh, right! After you drop her off, come to the Honey Mead Tavern. You've achieved results on your first day, so I'm buying. Got it?"
"Understood."
I answered through gritted teeth. She wants to get me drunk to prevent any 'accidents,' huh? You've vastly underestimated my libido. I will absolutely, definitely not get drunk.
As I walked down the street with Iruna, I could hear the comments from passersby.
"Look at that guard dragging a woman along. I hope she's a criminal."
"Please let her be the wall-mounted type. With looks like that, I could blow a few loads."
"You premature-ejaculating bastard. Does blowing a lot of loads make her pregnant? You have to make even one shot count."
Hearing the lewd talk, Iruna shrank back. This was my chance. Time to use the conversational skills I'd honed on the internet.
"Did you hear that, Miss Iruna? The people in this city aren't kind. You never know when they might turn on you and attack."
"Hic."
"Even going to the clinic will be dangerous. I've heard there are healers these days who take advantage of bodies under the guise of treatment. If that happens, you'll think my inspection was nothing."
"T-then what should I do?"
I had so many more persuasive arguments ready, but she's already convinced? That's Iruna for you. Truly stupid and innocent.
"You haven't decided on a place to stay yet, have you? How about coming to my house?"
"To your house, Mr. Guard?"
Iruna looked up at me. Look at those teary eyes. I want to devour her right now.
"...I can trust you, Mr. Guard."
"Thank you for trusting me. Then, let's go to my house."
By the way, where was my house? Sigh, Mr. Creator. If you were going to have me possess this body, you should have given me the original's memories too. It looks like I'm about to become a lost child in a life I didn't ask for.
*
Sma somehow managed to find his house. Since he had to leave immediately for the drinks, Iruna was left alone in the house.
This is the guard's house.
Iruna lay on a bed that was incomparably softer than the one at her family home, lost in thought. Today had been a truly eventful day. The city she visited for the first time in her life was far more desolate than her hometown, and the process of getting a hunter license was more humiliating than she had imagined.
Not only had she exposed her naked body—which she had never shown to any man—to a guard, but her breasts had been handled like toys, and even her virgin territory had been invaded.
I thought for sure I was going to be forced into baby-making back then.
She had been trembling with fear that she would be branded a criminal if she resisted, but the guard had backed off. His businesslike attitude afterward made her think it really was just part of the inspection process.
She was so grateful for the potion and the Return Scroll he had given her, telling her to be careful. It was a kindness Iruna, who had worked odd jobs since childhood to support her aging parents and young siblings, had never received before. Honestly, it brought tears to her eyes.
She had been terrified when she encountered the monsters, but she found courage by remembering the guard's kindness. Once she resolved to become a successful hunter and repay him for the potion and the scroll, her magic even flowed more easily.
However, the magic she was so proud of didn't work against the Baldy hunters. When her clothes were torn while they half-mocked her, she wanted to bite her tongue and die.
The only reason she didn't was because of her family back home, who were waiting for the money she would send. Just as her robe was stripped away and her skin was halfway exposed, she remembered the Return Scroll the guard had given her.
The Return Scroll she activated with all her might brought her back to the guard. How relieved she felt when she saw his cold, businesslike face.
The guard is my savior. That scary older sister called him Sma.
Guard Sma. After repeating his name a few times, her mind naturally drifted to his touch. The thick hands that had led her here. The firm shoulders she felt when he supported her.
And the touch of his hands on her breasts and pussy. It was the first pleasure Iruna, who had never even masturbated in her life, had ever experienced. Just thinking about it again sent a tingling sensation down her spine.
"Lord Sma..."
Possessing a sensitive body befitting an eroge protagonist, Iruna unconsciously brought her hand to her breast. If Sma had seen this, he would have cheered, shouting, 'The first masturbation scene of her life on Day 2!'
"Hngh. Lord Smaa."
Touching her breasts alone wasn't enough stimulation. She worked up the courage to touch her nipples, but it didn't provide the same pleasure as when Sma touched them.
As expected, did she have to touch down there? Just as Iruna, swallowing hard, slowly slid her hand into her panties, Sma appeared.
"!!!"
Iruna was so shocked she froze right there. Seeing this, Sma looked at her with an absurd expression.
"Look at this. I told you to stay put, and here you are masturbating."