Chapter 23
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Translator: penny
Chapter: 23
Chapter Title: Interlude - Magical Interview
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What do new recruits do when they first arrive at the barracks?
A bunch of different answers might come up, but there's one thing everyone goes through sooner or later, no matter what.
The interview with the first sergeant.
It's a chance to get acquainted with the first sergeant and ease some of that pent-up tension.
Of course, that's just fancy talk for it—what really happens is that skipping it entirely would be ten times better.
The first sergeant interview is just one step in picking a suitable scapegoat to dump burdensome duties and responsibilities on. At least, that's how it was for me.
Hell, the first thought that crossed my mind when I faced a life-threatening situation in that other world was whether the first sergeant had sent an assassin after me.
Of course, after the first time, I dropped that line of thinking.
Well, maybe after the fourth or fifth.
Anyway.
Now that Magical Girls were handling military roles, it wasn't all that different this time either. I'd just been notified that I had an interview with the first sergeant Magical Girl today.
Except.
"Uh... it's been a while... right?"
"...It's been less than a day since we parted."
"R-right... s-sorry."
The rank of the interviewer was a bit... high.
It was supposed to be the first sergeant Magical Girl, but when I opened the door and stepped in, there was a three-star Magical Girl waiting.
Yeah. The White Magical Girl.
Honestly, I had no idea. Who could've predicted someone of that rank would show up for my interview?
"Uh, anyway... hi...?"
"Uh... hello."
Still, considering the White Magical Girl was my direct superior, it wasn't entirely incomprehensible.
But.
"How's Magical Girl life treating you, Siyul?"
"It's garbage."
"Good to hear. Glad you're doing fine."
It's hard to just brush off when not one, but two three-star Magical Girls are involved.
The Purple Magical Girl wasn't even from our unit.
What the hell was she doing here?
No matter how I looked at it, something was off.
"By the way, Siyul, did you have some drinks last night by any chance?"
How did she know, this woman?
"N-no, why do you ask?"
"Tch, really? I had a feeling."
She even had good instincts.
She was seriously uncomfortable to deal with.
Truth be told, I wasn't in great shape. If I relaxed even a little, I'd probably hurl right then and there.
First time touching booze in my life—who the hell expects a guy like that to drink properly? I just chugged whatever they handed me.
Thanks to my body recovering somewhat, I was holding it together for now. If I'd been in the state I was during that other world mess, groaning and all, I wouldn't have gotten out of bed for at least a day.
Anyway.
I quickly changed the subject before she could pick up on my drinking any more.
"Aren't you from another unit? What's the sudden visit about?"
"Just curious, that's all. Why? Can't I have an interview with you?"
"No, it's not that, but..."
I shot the White Magical Girl a look that said, Is this normal?
"Hehe... we said hi..."
But the White Magical Girl just giggled to herself, clearly pleased.
Was she really unhinged?
So fitting for the head of the Magical Girls.
A total psycho.
Still, it worked out for me.
We hadn't parted on good terms last time, so I felt a bit awkward, but she didn't seem to care at all.
At that moment, the Purple Magical Girl waved it off.
"Eh, whatever, let's skip the small stuff. Truth is, I came here to ask you something."
"Me?"
"Yeah."
The Purple Magical Girl flashed a bright smile.
What could she possibly want to ask that brought her all the way here? Even the White Magical Girl was putting on a serious face now—it had to be something important.
That's when the White Magical Girl spoke up.
"You ran into a Monster that could speak human language last night—technically early this morning, right?"
"Ah, yeah."
"Could you tell us the details? We haven't gotten a full report on our end."
I nodded and broke it down into four points.
First, I took down the Monster with the flowerpot on its head.
"That one would've been tough to handle at first glance, but you stayed calm and blocked it well, huh?"
"A lot came flying at me, but I just dodged by luck."
"Huh? By yourself?"
"Can't you?"
Well, she did have a build that wasn't exactly suited for that.
Can't help it if you're an auntie.
"You just thought something weird, didn't you? I'm suddenly pissed for some reason."
"...I'll keep going."
Second, the Magical Girls slacking off on the front lines flipped out and demanded we hand over the Monster we'd subdued.
"They were scarfing down instant noodles and snacks, too."
"Should I just kill them all, Seobin?"
"It's the advanced Magical Girl management period these days, so better handle it outside."
Third, while we were facing off against the Magical Girls, the Monster suddenly started talking.
"The Monster just started speaking out of nowhere? No other symptoms, just like that?"
"...Yeah. I have no idea how."
Of course, I skipped anything related to the other world.
Just glossed over it vaguely.
"Nothing else?"
"There is."
Finally, fourth, the Monster used Whitey’s magic wand to kill itself.
"Our report said Gold Retriever took it out, but it was suicide after all. Well, results-wise, not wrong."
"First time I've seen a Monster commit suicide... Must've been hell for it fighting you, Siyul. Anyway, good work."
"...Yeah."
It was definitely a lot of work.
Mostly on my mind.
"That's the gist."
I meant to keep it short, but there was more to it than I thought, so the explanation dragged on. My throat was starting to feel dry.
That's when the White Magical Girl spoke.
"Sorry to ask again, but just to confirm—it wasn't some uniquely shaped Monster, just one with a flowerpot on its head, right?"
"A flowerpot on its head isn't weird?"
"Eh, I've seen that type plenty. But first time one's talked like this. And it didn't say anything at the start."
"True. It just started shooting stuff right away."
"Then it's the one I know... Hm..."
The White Magical Girl trailed off with a hum and fell silent.
Meanwhile, the Purple Magical Girl voiced her doubts.
"So, did the Monster say anything special right before dying?"
"Uh..."
Well, yeah.
That it wouldn't see a scumbag like me again.
Of course, I didn't say that out loud. I'd already cut out all the other world stuff from my recap—and conveniently, anything bad about me too.
From their reactions, they knew it spoke, but not the details.
Probably trimmed at the officer level.
Or maybe the officers didn't get the full info either.
Either way, it suited me fine. Better than rumors spreading that I was the world's biggest asshole.
On the other hand, the Purple Magical Girl pressed me again on her earlier question.
"Feels like there's more. If there is, tell us, Siyul."
"Hold on..."
That's why people with sharp instincts are a pain.
They zero in on even the tiniest oddity.
But there wasn't much to tell.
Aside from the Monster cursing me out, nothing all that special...
Ah, there was one thing.
"It called itself human."
"Really?"
"Yes."
The Monster had definitely said it.
That it was 'human' like me.
Meaning it saw itself as human.
"Um, uh..."
"Just call me Siyul."
"Right, Siyul."
The White Magical Girl met my eyes.
Hers held questions—and a quiet, smoldering anger.
Embers. But ones that would never die out.
"It didn't call itself a Monster?"
"No, just human."
"I see..."
The White Magical Girl's gaze sharpened further. Was she thinking something over?
At that moment, the Purple Magical Girl chimed in.
"Anyway, good work. I specifically said not to touch it, but oh well."
"The battalion commander sent me."
"Ah, got it. I'll remember that."
The Purple Magical Girl smiled brightly.
But it wasn't refreshing at all. It felt sticky, vicious.
She had it out for the battalion commander now.
Congrats, you piece-of-shit battalion commander.
"Anyway, that's all I wanted to ask. Anything you want to say to me, Siyul?"
I jumped on her words.
"Yeah, one favor."
"Shoot."
In my eyes, the Purple Magical Girl was the real power player.
Not just authority, but she probably had a wide network too.
So.
"I want to find someone."
"Who?"
"My parents."
Surely she could help track them down.
"Might be rude, but aren't you an orphan, Siyul?"
"Not sure yet. They vanished from records after the Monster outbreak. No confirmation on if they're alive."
"Got it. I know some experts—I'll ask around."
As expected, she had connections. If she called them experts, they had to be top-notch.
"Won't be quick, though. It'll take time. Not easy at all."
I nodded.
It'd be a long wait for results, but way better than not even trying.
Really lucky.
"Thanks. How much will it cost?"
"Nah, I'll cover it. In return."
"In return?"
The Purple Magical Girl smiled faintly at me.
"I'll ask one favor as payment for finding them."
"Like what?"
What was she planning?
A twinge of unease.
"Spend your entire leave with the Magical Girl I set you up with."
Tough request.
I had zero interest in getting tangled with Magical Girls, and now blow my precious leave on one?
"Who's the Magical Girl? How many?"
"Secret. That's what makes it fun."
She wouldn't even tell me who.
I snuck a glance at the White Magical Girl, wondering if she'd spill.
But she avoided my eyes, staying silent.
Meaning everyone else in the room knew who it was—except me.
Why not say it, then?
Was there some issue?
Uneasy. My instincts were warning me faintly.
"Well? Not a bad deal, right?"
Spend my rare leave on some mystery Magical Girl—or girls...
She hadn't said how many.
Could be multiple.
This would drive me insane. A normal guy like me can't handle psychos.
Of course, I didn't say that.
Instead.
"What do I have to do on leave?"
"Just eat together, hang out, grab dinner and drinks when it gets late?"
"What if it goes further?"
"Oh? Now I'm curious how far it'll go."
The Purple Magical Girl chuckled.
Hard to pin down, but it felt provocative—like daring me to try, while hoping for more.
Something felt off. Like I'd been turned into a Go stone and placed on the board without knowing.
A faint aversion bubbled up.
"On second thought, that's a bit..."
"Ah, I'll handle your leave separately."
"How many for a wild time?"
"...Just one. Didn't say anything about wild."
Contempt flickered in the Purple Magical Girl's eyes.
Whatever.
She was giving leave—I could handle this much.
Might as well go bold now.
"While we're at it, how about a promotion?"
"Can't. Need justification."
Shot down immediately.
"Too bad."
"Can't be helped. Discharge isn't as easy as it sounds."
"True."
She shut it down firmly, but no big deal. Leave alone was a win.
Think about it—spend leave with a Magical Girl, but I just stay sharp. Easy.
So I reaffirmed my resolve.
I absolutely won't stick it in a Magical Girl.
"Anyway, nothing else? Interview's over then. Cool, Siyul?"
"Yeah."
I stood, turned, grabbed the doorknob. Then the White Magical Girl mumbled a goodbye.
"S-Siyul. T-take... care."
"Yeah, see ya."
I stepped out.
Behind the closed door, faint voices of the two Magical Girls, but too muffled to make out.
"Heehee, she already called his name."
"...Damn it, you bitch."
And that ended my first interview.
Chaotic and ambiguous.
But way better than back in the army.