Why Are You Having a Standoff Over Me?
Fortunately, Elisa pulled away from me. She seemed to like the compliment.
Of course, that didn’t mean her interest in me had completely died. She kept staring straight at me. I wiped my face several times, wondering if something was stuck on it, but her gaze never wavered.
“Do you have some kind of complaint about me?”
“No. Don’t worry about it.”
“I’d love not to, but if you keep staring like that, I can’t help but notice. Besides, your place is in the rear now, isn’t it? You’ve come too far forward.”
I kept my cool and laid out the logic point by point. Whether she understood or not, she finally turned her head slightly to the side.
Was that it? No. That was a mistake. Elisa had only looked away for a moment because she’d sensed something nearby.
“A rabbit.”
“So it is.”
“Why didn’t you tell the team? That a rabbit had shown up.”
“Pardon? It was just a small animal’s presence. I didn’t think it was worth reporting.”
“And what if that rabbit had turned into a monster?”
Any animal with a spine could become a monster. There were even members of my kind who went further, modifying insects and cephalopods into something else. So yes, a rabbit could become a monster… but a creature that small and weak turning into one? It wouldn’t even be dangerous.
“My original role was scout.”
“I’ve taken that over.”
“I never agreed to that.”
“Then shouldn’t you be looking somewhere other than my face?”
“…I am looking.”
It felt like talking to a child. There was no logic. She wasn’t even throwing a tantrum—what was she trying to do?
“And it’s not like your face is painted gold. What’s wrong with looking?”
“It’s uncomfortable. Stop it already!”
“No.”
This woman was impossible. Had she chosen this as her way of tormenting me?
If she was holding a grudge because I’d scolded her earlier, that was a bit much. It wasn’t even that harsh. My tone might have been sharp, but it was solid advice that would do her good.
“Hmm. I see. Right.”
“Ugh…”
“You’re shorter than I thought. About a hundred and fifty centimeters?”
“I’m taller than that!”
Actually, I was 149.8 cm. Rounded up, that made 150, so I was taller. Probably.
It’s not like I wanted to be born in this body either.
I still didn’t understand why I was so small. Other parts of me were decently sized, but while every last one of my kin was massive and monstrous, I alone had ended up like this.
Of course, the smaller the body, the easier it was to move unseen and the lower the chance of being discovered. I’d survived this long thanks to this frame.
And if the face was cute… well, it made it easier to win favor with women.
“Your skin’s pretty good. Never did farm work, huh? Hmm. Big eyes… and a mole under one of them. That’s charming too.”
“Look… I can put up with the staring, but do you have to give a full review of my face?”
I muttered it with more irritation than I meant to. If she was going to look me over, she could at least do it quietly. Who would take it kindly when she muttered like that, all creepy?
I wasn’t as sensitive about sex as the men these days. I was just plain annoyed.
“Observation.”
“Then why not write it in a diary? You don’t need to say it out loud.”
“Write about you in my diary? Hmm. You’re bolder than I thought.”
“Excuse me?”
“You little smartass.”
Elisa spat the words and fell back again. My brain short-circuited for a second and failed to process the phrase.
So the surveillance is over, then.
At least the gaze that had been dissecting my body was gone. That was something.
“Elisa, why do you keep looking down?”
“Because he’s more tempting than I expected.”
“Hm?”
“Nothing. Just thinking. Trying to figure out how to deal with a man who keeps scrambling my head.”
“What, you had someone you liked?”
The elf archer let out a short laugh.
“Not like. I just want to make him cry.”
“What? Then just hit him once. Want me to do it for you?”
“That won’t work. I’m going to hit him myself. Thwack, thwack.”
“Oh, really? Good luck with that.”
“Yeah. I might have to pin him down by force soon.”
…She wasn’t talking about me, right? Still, I was grateful the staring had stopped—
“Hi.”
Never mind.
And so, the entire way back to the city, I had to keep blocking Camilla’s fingers from slipping inside my clothes.
We returned to the city. With the job finished, a little rest would have been nice, but the Hero clearly had other ideas.
Sloan paced back and forth in front of the board like a big dog that had just found water, hovering around the quest postings.
“This request looks fun too… No! It’s too far!”
That was how Adventurers’ Guild quests worked. Simple jobs were roughly pinned to the plaza board, and the first person to finish them got paid.
High-difficulty quests required you to be a full-fledged adventurer. Of course, the higher the difficulty, the better the pay.
And to become a full adventurer, you have to clear at least three of these quests.
We’d already done two, so one more quick clear would do it.
But Sloan… was hunting for quests purely for fun.
That’s the Hero?
Not some sacred champion with a lofty goal, standing against our kind.
Just… someone who fought because it was entertaining. Completely unhinged.
“Ah! This one! This looks fun!”
She tore the request off the very bottom of the board.
Goblin pack spotted in the sewers. One copper coin paid per goblin.
Goblins again. And we had to go into filthy sewers for them. Absolutely not…
There were far more dangerous and difficult jobs available.
“Sloan! That’s a bit… We’d be better off hunting wolves. You don’t even know where the goblins are.”
“It feels like a treasure hunt. Sounds fun. Let’s try it!”
“You’re the only one who sees goblins as treasure.”
Truth was, if I set my mind to finding them, I could do it in no time. Goblins were just another type of greenskin.
Wild ones out in the wilderness were one thing. Locating goblins that had drifted into a city? I only needed to pay a little attention.
I could just dump it on Urk Heizen. The real problem is why I have to go into the sewers at all.
Seriously? Taking this worthless request just for fun?
A Hero ought to pick something harder. Something that would save more people… that kind of thing.
“I like this one.”
We couldn’t break the Hero’s stubbornness. She was the party leader, after all. That was how it worked.
I let out a long sigh and followed behind her. Looks like I was in for another round of mental exhaustion.
“Hey, Sloan! If we’re going into the sewers, we’ll need all sorts of preparations.”
“Yeah, that’s true.”
“I need to pick up potion ingredients too… So, mind if I duck over to the market for a bit?”
“Sure, go ahead.”
“Got it! Come on, let’s go!”
Camilla grabbed my hand and pulled. Wait—why me?
“I need a porter. You know how weak I am.”
Don’t lie! You almost knocked me over just now!
“It’s fine if we go, right? Vali too.”
“Vali’s opinion is what matters. Can he go with you?”
I was about to refuse on the spot, but then I saw it—Camilla’s cold stare.
Using the overwhelming presence that came with her height, she pinned me with a look that said she would crush me if I refused.
If I said I wasn’t going, what would this woman do? She’d start touching me all over again, every last corner.
“I’ll g—”
“Go alone.”
An unexpected voice cut Camilla off. I jumped and looked over.
“Huh?”
“I said go alone, Camilla. You can manage by yourself, can’t you? And stop holding Vali’s hand like that.”
“Ah, this… Elisa. You don’t seem to get it. The two of us are close.”
Camilla’s pale, slender fingers slipped between mine. The cold sensation sank all the way to the bone. At the same time, the white mage’s eyes went the same way.
“We hold hands and everything. It’s not that big a deal, is it? When a man and woman are close, they can hold hands.”
“From where I’m standing, you two don’t look close at all.”
“Hmm? I have no idea what you mean. Vali and I have even slept in the same bed.”
“Don’t say it like that!”
“You.”
“N-no, we did sleep together… but you were right there next to us!”
“…Don’t say things that invite misunderstanding. People are staring.”
“I’ll be careful~ Sorry, sorry!”
Camilla let go of my hand. Thankfully her eyes went back to their usual vacant look. Whew. Crisis averted. It had just blown over.
“Still, I’m definitely the closest to Vali out of all of us.”
The mage looked at Elisa and gave a little smile. Elisa’s brow furrowed, making no effort to hide her irritation.
“You’re so annoying. Seriously.”
I had no idea why she was annoyed, and I never got the chance to find out—Camilla dragged me off before I could.