That's Cruel
That was how it started.
If all he had wanted was their attention, Heukgom had succeeded. He had reeled in an absurd number of them in a single cast. At the same time, every one of them knew perfectly well that Heukgom was not the sort of man who joked.
Enlisting was not the sort of thing a person could simply shrug off. And so the group chat, which on an ordinary day could barely hold itself together, bunched into a tight knot and began pinning down a date for their regular meetup—and they even promised to drop by the short-film festival Wonsung-ing had been going on about.
Every one of them.
Except Sua.
The fact that Sua was busy was, for the people in that group chat, a genuinely difficult thing to get used to. Even so, not one of them took it as a slight. Everyone had their own circumstances.
Ah. In truth, there was one person who did feel slighted.
Who else could it be. It was Deer.
Morning. Sua had only just woken—but that meant only that she had shoved her eyelids up, not that she had raised her body. She was still in bed, savoring whatever drowsiness she had left. And then it happened.
♩ ♪ ♬
Her phone rang out of nowhere. Sua answered without so much as checking who was calling.
"Hello."
No answer.
"Hello?"
"Hey!"
"...!"
Sua jolted upright. She thought her eardrum was about to drop clean off.
"Hel—hello?"
"Lee Sua! Why aren't you looking at the group chat!"
"What?"
Sua narrowed her eyes, a beat too late. The only person who would call her, and the only person with a voice this sharp and ringing, was Ko Eunbi.
"Why. What's going on."
"Heukgom's going into the army!"
"What?"
Sua was genuinely shaken.
"Heukgom wasn't a girl...?"
Hadn't their group chat been nothing but girls? Now that she thought about it, maybe Heukgom had been the only guy. He barely ever typed, so she hadn't really known.
"...Do you even pay attention to the chat? Anyway, you're coming too, right? Everyone else said they would. You're not gonna be the only one who doesn't show."
"When is it."
"A week from now. Wonsung-ing threw a fit about wanting to see this year's short-film festival, so we all decided to go that day."
Sua thought it over. Hmm. Deer kept going.
"I'm insanely busy that day too, but it's a group thing, so I said I'd join after work. So don't act all expensive and just come. I'll cover your cab."
"What's gotten into you. Suddenly paying for a cab."
But her suspicion soon landed somewhere.
"...Don't tell me you were serious about spanking me. Trying this hard to drag me out is suspicious as hell. Why are you being so scary."
"Hey, the suspicious one is you."
"What?"
"You told Saengji you've been busy lately, didn't you. Even said you're acting, or whatever it was. Are you insane? Why are you suddenly talking about becoming an actor at your age?"
"We're not that old, are we?"
Early twenties, and she says we? Sua swallowed the rest.
"That's not the point.... Your talent...."
Ko Eunbi couldn't finish. Sua, by then, had finished thinking. If it fell on the day of the film festival, she probably wouldn't have the time. It bothered her that she wouldn't get to see Heukgom before he enlisted, but she could always send a gift on her own. Sua nodded.
"Sorry. I don't think I can make it either."
No answer.
"Next time. Next time."
"...You mean that?"
Ko Eunbi's voice had gone oddly serious.
"For real. You're really not coming?"
"Huh? Y-yeah."
From the other end of the phone came the sound of a heavy sigh. Sua was just furrowing her brow, already tired of whatever lecture might be coming this time, when—
Ding.
Her phone chimed. Sua glanced at the message without thinking.
"...!"
And then she had no choice but to go round-eyed.
Ko Eunbi had, out of absolutely nowhere, sent her a million won.
"...What is this."
"Hey, Lee Sua."
"Yeah?"
"I know nothing works out no matter what you try, and I get that you're getting depressed and your pride's wearing down, but don't worry about it too much. We're still... you know... friends."
"Hm?"
"...Don't skip meetups just because you're embarrassed you can't find a job. That's even more embarrassing. Got it, or don't you."
"Huh?"
"Just think of this as allowance. I've been making good money lately."
Sua understood the situation itself, at least. In short, Ko Eunbi seemed to have decided that Sua was skipping the meetup because she was beating herself up after one failure after another.
No? I'm actually just busy?
"And don't get swept up in cheap temptations. If some guy asks you to sleep with him, don't just roll right over. Your brain's so small it actually worries me."
"What are you even saying. No, anyway, a million won is too—"
And then it happened. Sua's words jammed shut in her throat, because several versions of herself had surfaced inside her. Two of them, for now. A tiny self made up as Kim Yu-han, and a tiny self dressed in Wi Ji-hye's robes. The two of them launched into a breathless debate in Sua's mind.
"Return it!"
Wi Ji-hye Sua shouted.
"What makes a human human is that they know shame. You will return it. Without fail."
Sua agreed. And yet.
"Seniors, are we certain of that?"
Kim Yu-han Sua gave a shrug.
"Wouldn't the other person actually be happier if you took it?"
What? It's a million won. What are you talking about?
"Think of how Deer usually conducts herself."
How Deer usually conducts herself....
"When a game goes badly, she blames Sua. In the group chat, she is always teasing Sua. Of course, it may be her own way of showing affection, but that does not make it a good thing, does it? Sua has feelings, too."
Right. That's true. She tormented me way too much.
"Which is to say, Deer wishes to lighten her own sense of debt. She knows she has failed to treat you well, and so she wants to repay that debt of the heart in this fashion. Therefore, you should accept it."
Huh?
"Senior gains money, which is pleasant, and Deer lightens a debt of the heart, which is also pleasant. Mutual aid. If anything, you could demand still more...."
"You insane wretch. Is there anything you will not say."
Wi Ji-hye Sua began to thrash, too late, but Sua had already decided to take Kim Yu-han Sua's side. Decision made. And therefore—
"Um, Eunbi. One order of chicken, too..."
Two days later, on the set of Special Task Force 808, filming was in full swing with everyone looking on. The basic storyline had all been shot. What they were adding now, at the very end, was a scene meant to slip in a product placement for the energy drink Extreme.
"Waaah! Waaaaaah—!"
"Mom...!"
Inside a dark, cramped warehouse, children were sobbing, crying out desperately for their parents.
Thud—!
Then someone began pounding, hard, on the warehouse door that had been locked solid.
Thud—!
Thud—!
The children clutched one another. Their bodies shook violently, and their faces—though the darkness kept it from showing—had gone paler than at any moment before.
"H-hwaaaa...."
"No.... No...."
Bang—!
But when the door opened at last, what stood there was not some menacing stranger. It was Kim Yu-han. No one needed to tell them to stop crying. The usual razor-sharp eyes were nowhere to be found, replaced by something gentle—a craft so complete it was as if the face itself had been exchanged. And then, without a single word, Kim Yu-han dropped to one knee to meet the children's eyes.
Neither child made a sound. They had already stopped crying.
That was all he said. And in the next instant—
"Good! We'll leave it there!"
Director Choi Heewon's satisfied shout burst out, and the staff who had been watching beside him with their breath held broke into applause. The funny part was that the children clapped too.
"Big bro, you're sooo handsome."
"Big sis, you're sooo pretty."
"Big sis...? Big bro...?"
Sua gave a small nod.
"You guys. Come here."
The children immediately fled the set. Sua's face, once she had stepped out of the role, was simply too frightening, and so Sua—who had meant to hug each of them once—sank into gloom.
"..."
In the meantime, writer Lee Geumsuk came over. In the children's place, she pulled Sua into a tight embrace.
"Miss Sua. Thank you, truly. This long, long shoot is over at last. You worked so hard. You worked hard finishing a role that had been left unfinished, and you worked hard interpreting my script. Really."
Lee Geumsuk was gazing at Sua with damp eyes. Sua had a faint sense of when a face like this appeared. It was the expression that came out when there was far too much left to say. Around then, Sua felt a great many gazes on her. Every member of the crew was looking only at her.
Special Task Force 808 had finally finished every last schedule. Now all that remained was to sit and wait for it to air, and it was plain they wanted Sua, who had carried the lead, to offer some word to mark the end. Sua wondered briefly what she ought to say. Then, all at once, that absurd slip of hers came back to her.
"This was Kim Yu-han, in the role of Lee Sua. Thank you."
It came with a smile that broke loose despite her.
That night, Sua—granted a stretch of empty schedule for the time being—was in the middle of savoring her freedom. Walking the neighborhood alone for the first time in a long while, the feeling was rather unfamiliar.
Had the world always been this beautiful?
I'm pretty happy.
The shoot for Special Task Force 808 was over, and Sua's reflection on it was brief. If she alone had enjoyed it, it would have been a selfish shoot. But her effort had become fuel for someone else, and she had seen every one of them cheering. She wanted to work even harder.
I'm glad I started acting.
The returns since she had gained the Special Privilege had been enormous. She had set foot on an actor's path. She had made precious bonds. And....
...I made an absurd amount of money.
How cold had Sua lived, back in her jobless days? Now merely looking at her account balance melted every worry clean away. Her heart thudded. What would be good to do with this money?
Delivery food? No. Save it. Save.
She had just quietly firmed her resolve when she stopped short. The steps that had been carrying her onward without rest came to a halt all at once. She had found something that planted itself in her way, as if demanding to be seen.
Staring at the clear display case, Sua thought it over. Ah. No. Dolls were a hobby it was about time she let go of. Yes. The season for playing with rabbit dolls had passed. An arctic fox required a far more refined hobby. In any case, playing with dolls was not allowed. It was bad for building an image, even. Yes—a conclusion that would not change if she thought it over a hundred times, a thousand.
And yet.
Again and again.
"...?"
Her gaze went and settled on a fox doll. No—since when had the fox doll even been there? Her eyes were drawn to it like a magnet. Ah, but still. Dolls were a bit much. She wasn't a little kid. Sua was mentally mature now.
"...Ridiculous. I am absolutely not interested."
She muttered it with complete confidence, even as she flung open the door of the doll department store.
"Welcome~"
"...Mh?"
Meanwhile, a man and a woman were walking the street with hats and masks tugged low. Their proportions were so striking that they gathered stares even with their faces entirely hidden. It was only natural. They were Kim Seonil and Seo Yeon-ju. Seo Yeon-ju grumbled.
"Are you in your right mind? Buying a doll at your age?"
"It isn't my doll. It's a doll for my sister."
"Then ask your sister and buy it. I can't understand why you're asking me. I don't even like dolls. There's nowhere to put one at home, and they're something only little kids like to begin with."
Kim Seonil only walked in silence. The teddy bear his younger sister treasured was worn nearly to ruin, and he could not set the thought of it down. Now that he had remade his own heart, he wanted to replace her doll with a new one as well, so that she, too, might remake hers. Yes. So that from now on, his little sister could be happy, too.
"So how much farther do we have to walk?"
"We're almost there, I tell you. It's definitely around here. Remember when we gave Sua a ride in the van? We were right in front of the doll department store then. The place was huge. We'll just grab something there."
"...No 'just grabbing.' Watch your words."
"Yeah, yeah. Aigoo, so scary."
But the moment they arrived in front of the doll department store—
"..."
The two of them stopped dead. They had found someone familiar.
Lee Sua.
And it was no ordinary sight. Her face was buried in the belly of some fox doll, rubbing and nuzzling with abandon—more than enough to knock the breath out of Kim Seonil and Seo Yeon-ju.
"...What is that?"
Cruel.
She looked exactly like a beast devouring its prey, down to the very organs.