091 – The Outcasts #1

In the darkness, countless shadows materialized around a circular table.

"Isn't it risky to gather like this while the executives are hunting for insiders and stirring up a bloodbath? If Zagreus catches wind of it, we won't see anything good come of it."

"I agree, but why did you call us here, then?"

All eyes turned to the figure gripping a massive scythe, Thanatos the death god, his blue eyes gleaming coldly.

"From the manager-level hell cockroaches to this ghostification fiasco—things are only going against us. It's about time we dealt with the root cause."

"The root cause...?"

"Joey."

"......"

"...Joey."

The name from Thanatos's lips made every pair of eyes flash in a rainbow of emotions. Soon, a sharp, clear voice piped up from a woman.

"I never thought you'd be so fixated on a mere mortal. But it's true he's wrecked our plans repeatedly. So, what now? Kill him?"

Kill Joey. The room fell silent at those words. Thanatos, however, exploded in anger.

"If we did that, Joey would resurrect as a soul right here in Soul Society. Do you want him haunting us forever?"

"That's horrifying."

"We can't let Joey get permanent employment here."

"Therefore, from now on, we'll protect Joey with utmost care. We must prevent him from dying in some accident and becoming a lifelong employee."

Protect Joey's life. The Tartarus rebels nodded in agreement. The problem was that Soul Society brimmed with deadly hazards.

"What about the sulfur fire rain every three days? Mortals die if it hits them."

"The toxic mist seeping like dew every morning ravages their insides."

"This hell truly is the worst place for a living mortal to survive long-term."

"How the hell is that bastard Joey still alive? Damn resilient prick!"

Even these unflappable legion commanders clicked their tongues in disbelief when someone slammed the table—thwack!

"Doesn't ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠Joey need a dedicated bodyguard? Perfect timing. I'll step up, so sit tight, everyone. With some luck, I might even get him fired and sent back topside."

Hehehehehe— The woman began to laugh. Someone asked, "Fire Joey? How?"

"That guy's a legend even in Pandora Market, the graveyard of the demoted!"

"Simple—scandal. And the best kind? A sex scandal. Lucky for us, opportunity knocks."

"This time, I'll handle it myself. No interference, got it?"

Among Professor Zeus's graduate student squad, there was a saying: In any group of five, at least one is a total nuisance.

"Joey! My brother! Inviting me as an interviewer—I'm grateful! This Crowzer has a keen eye for talent."

"I, Narcissus, barely blink at most candidates. Wonder if any will inspire me."

"First time as an interviewer! Thanks to big bro Joey, I get to try this too! He's just so cool!"

"This Carnoy doesn't get it, but slamming reject stamps on resumes feels great...!"

"Alright, we'll start seeing applicants at 9 sharp. Get ready, everyone."

Crowzer, Narcissus, Hedone, Carnoy. And me, Joey. Four out of our five were walking disasters. The last one? A social terrorist desperately trying to get fired.

Pandora Market Development Division's new hires were doomed with interviewers like us—a suicide squad if there ever was one. What kind of "talent" would we pick?

Right on 9, the first applicant strode in.

"Gasp! You!"

Crowzer yelped in shock. Narcissus poked my side excitedly.

"Joey, we've hooked a big fish from the start!"

Who could it be? I scanned the woman from head to toe. Her wavy auburn hair like seaweed, copper skin, and skintight outfit screamed "yoga instructor." Stunning beauty—and wildly athletic!

Pop! Text materialized before her like a billboard.

Goddess of Pain? Holy crap—a headquarters executive! Cold sweat trickled down my back on instinct.

"Lady Oizys, if I may ask... You're applying to a job with low pay, no guaranteed hours, and vague duties that could mean any odd task?"

Imagine Elon Musk applying for a part-time gig at your local radio shack. That was me right now.

"Yep! I'll work under you, Joey, for peanuts, day and night, no fixed schedule. Honored, right?"

Why the hell? Then it hit me—she was the goddess of pain. Pain meant suffering, physical and mental.

Does Goddess Oizys enjoy pain? Thrives on hardship? That's why she's volunteering for this hellhole market!

Conclusion: Executive Oizys was a masochistic freak who got off on throwing herself into tough spots. Nothing else explained this.

"Having a talent like me nearby won't hurt you, Joey. This market's security is terrible, right? You need a bodyguard."

True, manager-level hell cockroaches popped out everywhere. With Oizys guarding me? My life expectancy skyrockets. Those ripped arms looked reliable.

That's the problem! Hire an executive as entry-level? Hell no!

Talent belongs at arm's length. My motto. But Crowzer and Narcissus were the issue.

"No need to see more. Hired!"

"Agreed."

The nuisance interviewers fell for her executive aura hook, line, and sinker. Then Hedone spoke up.

"I deduct points! Too much makeup for an interview. And that foundation—'Man-Killer #37,' right?"

Kill what? As I puzzled over the savage cosmetics name, Hedone added,

"Anyone wearing the wrong shade for their skin tone won't excel elsewhere. 'Fix yourself first before fixing the world,' right?"

Crowzer marveled. "Miss Hedone, you know such profound sayings?"

"Gotta inherit my company someday. Basics! Though catching up to awesome big bro Joey takes more than that."

"This Carnoy doesn't get it, but reject stamps hit harder and feel better...!"

Thud! Rejected. Oizys ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠stuck out her tongue in disbelief.

"Wha...? Me, rejected? This can't happen. It's 'cause I'm the goddess of pain, right? Afraid being near me brings suffering?"

She growled, grrr, shaking the building like it might collapse. We all trembled—until she stood.

"Fine!"

Whoosh. Oizys stormed out. Crowzer cheered.

"Whoa, brother Joey—thanks to you, we bounced a top exec! Time for the joy nymph dance!"

Thump-thump. The nuisances danced. But my eyes followed Oizys's retreating back. That self-loathing felt familiar... like Melinoë denying her nymph side.

"Handle the rest yourselves. I need to step out."

Tartarus legion commander Oizys stormed out of Pandora Market Development HQ in a fury. Onlookers shrank back in fear.

"...It's Oizys."

"Don't make eye contact. Might bring pain."

Not all executives commanded awe. Some inspired disgust or terror—like the goddess of pain.

Bragged I'd fire Joey, but came back empty-handed. Awkward. What now?

Post-reform, Oizys's influence at HQ was shaky—why she joined Tartarus. But even there, she was marginal. This gig was meant ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠to solidify her position. Epic fail. Who rejects an exec volunteering for peanuts?

"Lady Oizys!"

Someone chased after her. "Joey?"

"Lady Oizys, I'm truly sorry we can't work together. But if the right chance comes, I'd love to partner up."

"Hmph, too late for that. Whatever. You want to avoid pain too—no need to butter me up."

"Not flattery. I like it. Suffering and agony."

"Eww, you enjoy pain? Pervert?"

"Even this rejection thrills me. You get it—I'm sincere."

"......"

Oizys had heard endless bootlicking as an exec. Like, "Pain matters—it makes happiness shine!" or "Bitterness precedes sweetness!" Utter nonsense.

Pain has meaning in itself. Not a spice for happiness or sweets. Pain stands alone...

She believed true sophistication savored life's bitterness and coffee's bite—not childish sugar highs. Her view alone, though.

But Joey claimed he enjoyed pain. Seemed like flattery at first...

"I'd even be happy if I got fired."

Fired? Did he sniff out her Tartarus ploy to sack him? Then Joey dropped a bombshell.

"Plenty out there like me—folks who love pain and misfortune."

Love. No one had ever affirmed her so completely. Oizys froze, like hit by a cold gust. Doubt crept in—what was she even doing?

Dressing in clothes that don't fit, chasing what?

That day, an exec tendered resignation at HQ. Unprecedented.

Tartarus lost a legion commander. But Pandora Market's West Gate gained a new sports massage shop.

"This one's gonna hurt."

"Gaaah!"

"Eeeeek! Eeeeek!"

Screams of agony filled the air from tormented clients. Rumors swirled it was like disassembly and reassembly. Yet bookings overflowed—no walk-ins allowed.

Onlookers marveled.

"Enjoying this pain? Joey's one tough human."

"Total demon! Knew it since he tamed that hell cactus!"