Married Women's Hell #2
As I said this, it sounded ridiculous even to me. The headquarters staff were elites among elites. The women they chose as lifelong partners couldn't possibly be ordinary. In fact, the married women gathered at the wives' association were so captivating that it made perfect sense they were hitched to top brass.
Married women everywhere.
Best to observe the situation first.
"Manager Jo, try some of this. I made bossam and seasoned radish myself yesterday. By the way, my husband's a deputy in Welfare—could you go easy on him in the upcoming audit...?"
"Manager Jo, you wouldn't happen to be looking for a pretty girl to introduce? My little sister's been living alone, feeling all lonely—"
"Manager Jo!"
The married women adored me. Simple reason: I was the audit team's manager.
The audit team was like the grim reaper to HQ staff, a thorn in their side—despised as in-house hyenas that devoured their own. But even so, the audit manager's authority was immense.
...Jackpot!
Chance to become a corrupt magistrate exploiting married women with audit powers!
"I'll open my mouth, so feed me. Ah—."
"Try my kimchi!"
"No, mine's the fermented seafood!"
"Out of the way!"
"Gwahhh!"
But their unexpected fervor stuffed my mouth with food, choking me down to my throat.
I'd clearly underestimated these married women.
Barely survived. Thought I'd choke to death.
"Ahem, that's enough food."
The wives looked disappointed. That's when my eyes landed on one woman amid the chaos. She hadn't spared me a glance.
She had beautiful mature brown hair, but thick dark circles under her eyes made her look like a raccoon or panda.
Is that Andromache, Manager Hector's wife? Wife of someone higher up than me—no wonder she ignores me.
Then one woman approached Andromache. Blonde hair tied back—the one who'd visited HQ yesterday with lunchboxes for her husband and his friend. The one who'd given me candy beans.
"...Excuse me, ma'am. These pants I bought. You complimented mine last time, so I got the same."
Jet-black leather pants. Biker vibe.
But Andromache's expression soured. The other women pounced.
"Our ma'am looks better in skirts."
"Here, this skirt I bought!"
"Atalante, those pants would suit me perfectly? Oh! They fit me just right!"
Reminded me of my army days. As the division commander's orderly, I'd often drive to the officers' apartments for their wives' gatherings. Exactly like this.
Husband's rank was wife's rank. A two-star's wife became a two-star herself.
Andromache, Manager Hector's wife, was a manager here too.
Office life full of envy, jealousy, backstabbing, and slander—right here!
If our office was like this, I'd have been fired ages ago.
As I felt a pang of sympathy, the candy bean wife approached.
"You're Manager Jo, right? I'm your guide today. Name's Atalante. Married to Manager Hippomenes in Welfare."
So candy bean lady was Atalante. In Greek myth, she was a legendary heroine among heroines. Among mortals, few female warriors could match her.
But even that proud woman got picked on in wives' circles.
"Seems like the other ladies are giving you a hard time."
I asked quietly.
Atalante whispered back.
"I'm a newbie—just joined the wives' association. No time before, since I was working."
"Quit your job?"
"Yeah. Husband's a manager now, so I need to step up. From HQ manager level, no promotion without wives' association help..."
She glanced at me. Probably because I was a single manager without their support.
Then—
Andromache, surrounded by wives, panicked.
"She's coming!"
"She's here?"
"What on earth for!"
"She never shows up!"
Tension spiked instantly. Curious, I tensed too. Atalante explained.
"Vice president of the wives' association's coming today. She's the real boss here. Everyone grovels."
Wives' association vice president. How formidable could she be?
A woman with silver-white hair entered gracefully. What struck me oddly: her long, pointed ears. Nymph-like, but different.
She sat, crossing her legs elegantly.
"Sit, everyone."
"Whew, Lady Elfridi! You look extra beautiful today!"
"New perfume?"
Women swarmed like bees. Atalante clenched her fist.
"That's Elfridi. Zagreus Prince's second wife. He brought her from Earth. Foreign fairy, they say."
"Foreign fairy?"
"Elf, apparently. International marriage. Rumor is she has the prince tighter than first wife Nixdoty."
Elf international marriage. My mind reeled.
Yeah, 'elf' was a foreign fairy in Greek lore—international marriage fit.
Anyway.
"Quiet down. If you have gifts for me, line up orderly—no chaos."
The elf spoke sharply. Rich housewife vibe. And she was.
Women lined up.
"Gotta line up! Hippomenes has salary negotiations soon. Better butter her up. Real war starts now. Whew..."
Atalante joined; I followed.
Time passed. Atalante's turn.
"Elfridi, nothing special, but I made cactus fruit syrup myself."
"Huh? I'm dieting—no sweets, don't you know?"
Wrinkle on her fine brow.
Atalante floundered, eyes tearing up. Pitiful even to me.
And then—I sensed my chance.
"Elfridi, right?"
"Who're you? Why's a man at wives' meeting?"
"Manager Jo, Audit Team 1."
"Ah—you're that noisy Jo manager lately. What do you want?"
"Elfridi, I'm investigating you for improper solicitation and bribery. Accompany us to audit."
Silence fell. Like someone muted the world.
"...Huh?"
Her baffled exhale echoed loudest.
I'd just detonated a bomb. Like shoving honey-dipped hand into angry hornets' nest.
The elf burst out laughing.
"Know who I am? Funniest guy since Hassan. Fine, investigate. I'll cooperate. But handle the fallout yourself?"
"......"
Melinoë was in a foul mood. Jo had taken leave without contacting her.
"Muhuhu, us nymphs are native fairies...! But with rivals everywhere, living's tough these days...!"
"This Carnoy doesn't get it all, but thinks drastic measures needed to save domestic nymph farms...!"
As NEO nymph executive, Melinoë fumed at attending this ridiculous nymph meeting. She was a perfect goddess.
"Let's start with the Nymph Dance of Joy...!"
"Great idea...!"
Dumchit dumchit. Nymphs suddenly danced.
Adults Eurydol, Rilke, and Echo joined the dumchit dumchit.
Nymphs are idiots. Why dance out of nowhere?
Melinoë couldn't comprehend the nymph race. She was different—a perfect goddess.
Dumchit dumchit. But their rhythmic dance made her shoulders twitch.
Of course, she forced them still.
Then—
The TV she'd left on broke programming for breaking news.
Melinoë froze her twitching shoulders, mouth agape.
"Wives' association vice president?"
Melinoë had little to do with them, but knew their influence.
And Zagreus's second wife was that VP.
Second wife...
She pitied Zagreus's wives—how'd they end up with a brother like him?
But the second was different. Seeing that silver-white-haired elf stirred primal instinct in her.
Investigation into second wife's corruption. Perfect chance to dent Zagreus. Jo made this for me.
Melinoë bolted from the meeting. To help Jo seize the opportunity.
Eurydol smirked, arms crossed.
"Hating foreign elves is native nymph instinct. Princess can't resist it either. Denies it, though."
Siren Rilke nodded.
"Maybe this awakens her true nymph power. Our 'nymphbi-gi'."
Nymphs' scariest power came from nymphbi-gi. But Melinoë couldn't wield it—denied her nymph essence.
If this unlocked it? Soul Society power balance would shift instantly.
Even hipster Eurydol, ever sarcastic, praised Manager Jo sincerely.
"Impressive, Manager Jo. Stirring the hive to awaken princess's secret arts. Risking life for promotion... Nah, not promotion."
Eurydol knew another man who'd risk death for a goal. And their ends.
Tsk. Mood soured, she uncrossed arms.
"We should help Princess Melinoë and Manager Jo. Foreign vs. native fight."
"Huh, Eurydol? You fired up for once."