061 – Snake Voodoo #2
This underworld, the Soul Society, is ridiculously vast. And the area that takes up the most space is the former Tartarus, now known as Happy World.
Even within Happy World's grounds, more than half was so fiercely barren that not even ghost souls could linger. Squish, squuuish. Squelch. Thick, mud-like sludge everywhere.
"Walking knee-deep in this crap is killing me! Section Chief Jo! Carry me on your back!"
"Ow! Section Chief Jo, I got pricked by thorns! Carry me too!"
Prick, prick. Take your eyes off the path for a second, and hell cacti sprouted like thorny vines, wrapping around hands or ankles.
In Greek mythology, Tartarus was a place even gods feared to tread, so yeah, it made sense. One slip-up, and I'd actually die for real.
Crowzer, covered head to toe in mud, marveled at my tense expression.
"Look at Section Chief Jo's face, brimming with resolve! It's giving me chills. Man, it takes me back to our Argonaut expedition days!"
"We've got a head office section chief here, so it's reassuring."
"Still kinda scary, though…."
The foggy wasteland of Happy World, where nothing grew but thorn bushes and carnivorous plants. Who'd believe anyone lived in a hellhole like this?
"Come on, everyone, Lady Nix's garden isn't far now! Chin up!"
Admetus, the eternal deputy section chief from Charon Transport, led the way, clapping enthusiastically. And sure enough, somewhere in this wasteland lay the goddess of night Nix's garden. She chose to live in a place even executives avoided.
It was a perfect example of the awe-inspiring dignity of a primordial Protogenoi.
That's when I spotted someone far off waving—pink hair in twin tails.
"Hey! Heeeey! You guys the subjugation team this year? Over here! Here! Hurry up!"
She wore a white dress and a helmet-like skull from some goat or bull. It reminded me of Moros. Probably a similar entity.
Is she one of Lady Nix's children too?Lady Nix, goddess of night, had a ton of kids. That massive family formed the core of the "Night Faction." So what god was this quirky pink-haired woman?
As I racked my brain over the Greek family tree, Crowzer gasped in admiration.
"Isn't that Lady Nixdoty? I never dreamed I'd meet someone so reclusive! Traveling with Section Chief Jo really brings the luck!"
"Lady Nixdoty?"
Never heard of her. Crowzer elaborated as I blinked in confusion.
"I hear she's the youngest daughter, born from the night and darkness gods pouring most of their miracle shares into her. But these days, she's more famous as Prince Zagreus's first wife."
I recalled how the Night Faction's support for Prince Zagreus had blocked Lady Melinoë from the succession.
"So Prince Zagreus married one of the fearsome daughters of night to climb the ladder."
"Not quite. Word is, he met Lady Nixdoty when he ran away to the surface. She was living like a normal human up there."
"A human?"
The baby of night living like a mortal? Wild. As I pondered that, Crowzer glanced around and whispered.
"It only came out after they married, so there was major backlash. Bringing a living human down here as a wife violated underworld law back then. That's why he pushed Business Renewal."
In other words, to legally keep his lover in Soul Society, Prince Zagreus drove massive change.
"I heard he even grabbed the chairman by the collar fighting for marriage approval."
Romantic enough to go that far for love. My image of him shifted a bit. Not that it erased the red panties and cape pervert vibe.
But thinking how his reforms had me slogging through this mud soured it again. And if it was all for marrying this pink-haired lady…?
"Ooh shit! So many people! What's going on? Huh? Why's this year's subjugation team so huge?!"
She seemed a little off—high as a kite, like she'd popped something.
"Fight hard, everyone! I'll cast voodoo on you! Snake voodoo! The effect? Puhehe, no clue! That's voodoo for ya! Shit shit…!"
Shit shit—snake hisses? Totally bizarre.
Still, Crowzer and Admetus welcomed Lady Nixdoty warmly.
"Lucky to meet Lady Nixdoty."
"Yeah, she always casts voodoo like this. Zero effect, but hey."
Like a feel-good bluebird. Objectively, no mortal employee had reason to hate her.
"Safe travels! The battlefield's just ahead!"
We passed Prince Zagreus's first wife. Which got me wondering—first wife meant second and third existed too? No time to ask.
Far off, whooooosh. Fog cleared to reveal a massive monster flailing arms and legs. Tall enough to scrape the ceiling.
"This year's revived Typhon is even bigger than last!"
Crowzer gawked. His words jogged my memory of Typhon.
# # #
Typhon. Etymology of "typhoon." Gaia’s ultimate weapon to destroy the Greek gods. God of storms. A Protogenoi exemplar. His power overwhelmed Zeus, king of gods.
Of course, Zeus and hero Cadmus beat him. He got tossed into Tartarus.
Connected to Lady Melinoë too. Typhon's rampage cracked Soul Society with rifts. Hades patrolled the surface to check them and met Persephone.
No Typhon, no Melinoë.
"I am the doom of Olympus!"
His booming roar whipped up gale-force winds. Straight out of myth.
Even more shocking: his opponent.
"Prince Zagreus!"
"Typhon vs. the prince again this year?"
"Safety team's other execs too!"
The red-pantied guy floated midair, trading blows with giant Typhon. Boom, boom! Each punch shook Soul Society. Gods' fights were no joke—I felt like I was in the myth itself.
Even heroic Admetus was impressed.
"Beating demon god Typhon barehanded, no proper gear due to penalties. Prince Zagreus is something else."
"Penalties?"
I asked. Admetus explained.
"He snuck between surface and underworld, smuggling stuff in or out. Quynae's a prime example. Hence the punishment."
So the panties weren't fashion. My bad for the perv label. Time for a tiny self-reflection.
Crowzer added, "That punishment ended last year, I heard."
Reflection canceled. Prejudices and phrenology are statistics.
"So, Section Chief Jo, what should I do? Huh?"
Hedone hooked her arm in mine.
"Hedone, why not help the fight over there?"
"Huh? Section Chief Jo, you're hilarious! How's a delicate flower like me jumping into that monster brawl?"
"Nah, you're super strong. Have some confidence."
"Pfft! Lol!"
Wham wham! Her punches to my chest felt like meteors. Gonna die.
Right then—vrrrrum. Massive quake. Typhon collapsed.
"…I, shall be reborn."
"Battle stations, everyone!" Admetus yelled.
Clank, clank. Weapons drawn everywhere.
Hedone clung harder. "Eek! Section Chief Jo, so scary!"
You're the scariest.
But next, horror struck. Typhon's body disintegrated into… hell cockroaches!
Hell cockroaches!? My worst nightmare…!
—Jjoojee.
—Jjojee!
—Jjoojee!
A tsunami of roaches surged like a plague. That's why the subjugation team existed—for cleanup!
"Nuaaaagh!"
Gut-wrenching. Of all things, my phobia.
Crowzer hid behind me. "As expected of Section Chief Jo! That bloodcurdling war cry—even this Crowzer's hearing it fresh! Like Hercules! Protect me!"
"Me too!"
The black wave crashed in. I squeezed my eyes shut.
Perfect chance. Expose my utter uselessness. Farewell, Soul Society!
But then—
—Jjo, jjojeeek…!?
—Jjojeeek!
—Jjee….
Roaches flipped belly-up dead near me. What the—?
I noticed my hand moving on its own. Like someone else swinging it.
—Shit shit…!
My bracelet stretched like a venomous snake, slaughtering roaches.
"What the hell is this?!"
Then it hit me: the pink-haired goddess's snake voodoo. And Melinoë's hair meshing well with night magic.
Clueless Crowzer freaked. "Casually waving off roaches like flies! That's head office section chief power! Section chief spirit! Destroying foes from afar!"
"Section Chief Jo, you're so cool!"
"Hedone's dead!? You filthy roaches! Killing our comrade?!"
"…We can't stand idle! Charge!"
"Mmmhu, disgusting hell roaches, begone…! Nymph Skill Massive Beating!"
"Massive Massive Beating…!"
"Look! Nymph employees arrived!"
"Roaches retreating!"
"We win!"
"Long live Section Chief Jo!"
Slither. The bracelet retracted.
I desperately protested it wasn't me. "The bracelet did it! The bracelet!"
"Pfft, how's a bracelet gonna do that?"
"Snake voodoo? Puhaha! Section Chief Jo, you believe that junk? Voodoo's been debunked forever! You're killing me!"
No one bought it. But rumors spread weirdly.
"Heard Section Chief Jo tried crediting Nixdoty for wiping the roaches?"
"Yeah, claimed her voodoo did it."
"Voodoo? We saw him massacre them ourselves!"
"Maybe currying favor with Prince Zagreus."
My sanity snapped. I took leave.
Hiding under blankets at home, Melinoë ghosted in without knocking.
"Jo, you got invited to Prince Zagreus's wedding anniversary party. Not from him—from my sister-in-law. If this was all calculated, it's genius."