Let's Become a Tyrannical Boss (1)
It seemed like the guild master and vice guild masters all lacked any eye for talent. To keep someone like me in such a high position indefinitely.
So I decided to change my approach. Not looking up, but down.
"From today onward, I won't be using my personal office. I'll be at the reception desk."
"……Pardon?"
The Maries, who had been preparing for work at the reception desk, all tilted their heads in unison.
"If a troublesome customer shows up or a fight breaks out among rough adventurers, it must be hard for you to respond right away, Miss Marie. I'll step in whenever that happens. I'll always be here, watching over you and protecting you."
"I-if you do that for us, we'd be grateful……."
Despite their words of thanks, every single Marie blushed and couldn't meet my eyes straight on. It must feel incredibly burdensome, no doubt. I knew the feeling all too well. Even when nothing's wrong, having your boss looming behind you makes you anxious, everything goes wrong. Then petty mistakes pile up, and the boss nitpicks every one, tormenting you—it's pure hell.
What if I tormented Marie like that? Her stress might explode, and she could report my tyranny to the guild master or the other vice guild masters. Moreover, each of those countless clones of hers was recognized as a full guild member. A vice guild master has to coordinate and lead numerous guild members. Even as acting vice guild master, if she fell out with dozens of guild members, it would prove she wasn't fit for the role.
Of course, the very idea of tormenting Marie pricked at my conscience…….
Sorry, Miss Marie…… But I have to get myself expelled from this guild, even if it means doing this.
……My survival comes first.
"Welcome to the Tragodia Adventurer's Guild."
"How may I assist you?"
"I'll help with your request registration. Is this a labyrinth-related request? Or something else?"
But once work actually started, I couldn't follow through with my plan. At a glance, the Maries handled everything so flawlessly there was nothing to criticize. Sure, if I stared until my eyes popped out, I might catch some tiny slip-up.
"V-Vivaldi sir. Lots of work piling up today too, huh. Hehe……."
"……."
But with the paperwork flooding toward me, I had no time for that. The documents Haru delivered kept stacking up faster than I could process them.
"Customer?"
"……Wow."
"Customer?"
"……Ah, s-sorry. Drooling a bit…… Yeah, here to register a request."
"Is there somewhere you're feeling unwell?"
"N-no, nothing like that…… Hey, who's that guy over there, sweating through his shirt while he works?"
"That's Vivaldi, the acting vice guild master."
"Heh…… Makes my morning so much more energizing……."
For some reason, the clients lining up kept staring at me, oblivious even when their turn came. Reception was noticeably delayed, which might actually tank my evaluation a bit.
"Ha, ditching your personal office to work on the front lines with your subordinates? Truly touching dedication to the job."
"I'm sorry—"
"Hah? That was a compliment."
"……."
I could never tell how to handle Vice Guild Master Kali's attitude today either. Her outfit made it hard to even look straight at her.
"The number of clients coming in has skyrocketed. Thanks to you sitting there. Fine, I'll acknowledge that merit."
Kali was right. But I had no idea why. What did me sitting here have to do with that?
At this rate, my evaluation would shoot up again.
"But you know this, right? If adventurers fail to complete requests in a timely manner and they pile up, that drags down our guild's reputation too."
"Y-yes, that makes sense."
"So it's important to match adventurers efficiently to requests. Got it?"
This was it! Pair adventurers with requests that didn't suit their skills at all. When they botch it miserably, those prideful adventurers would surely blame me. They'd say I gave them something they couldn't handle. The guild's reputation and income would plummet, and even if the guild master and vice guild masters stayed quiet, the adventurers would chase me out themselves.
"Miss Marie, from now on, I'll oversee the adventurers picking up requests right beside you."
"Ah, y-yes……."
I plopped down right next to the Marie handling that duty. Adventurers started gathering at the bulletin board, picking out requests.
"Ahh, when's my suspension over? How long do I gotta do these lame requests? Pay sucks too."
The massive Bella stomped over and shoved a request form at Marie. It was a call for help: a pack of monsters nesting near the village.
Bella could wipe them out in seconds, but I didn't want that. I snatched the form before Marie could take it and handed Bella a different one.
"Miss Bella, how about this one instead?"
"Wh-what?"
Startled by my interruption, Bella squinted at the request I offered.
"Short-term blacksmith assistant? You kidding? I'm an adventurer! I became one to smash everything in sight, and you're telling me to do this crap?"
"But the pay's better here. No need to form a party either."
"……Hmph. Only 'cause it's you, Vivi."
Bella looked full of complaints but accepted the request anyway. As she said, she loved smashing things—that's why she was even on suspension. A blacksmith shop was a sacred place of creation, not destruction. It wouldn't suit a rampaging destroyer like her. Something would go wrong, she'd wreck everything, and instead of pay, the guild might end up compensating.
"I wanna go into the Great Labyrinth!"
"Miss Gerda, anywhere with monsters works for you, right? Head to this village."
"Got it wa yo!"
And the request Bella had wanted? I dumped it on Gerda. She dashed off, waving all four arms excitedly. Sending a monster-hating fanatic to exterminate monsters? What could be a more absurd mismatch?
"Bella! Don't go—come work at my forge! You've got real talent!"
"I-I appreciate it, but no thanks. I plan to stay in this guild."
A burly, muscular blacksmith came to the guild, gripping Bella's hands—hands even bigger than his own—begging earnestly. Contrary to my expectations, it seemed Bella had excelled at the forge…….
Bella sent the disappointed blacksmith away, then looked at me with a wistful expression.
"Actually…… I always dreamed of being a blacksmith, but my family opposed it, so I gave up. You saw through that and sent me there, huh? Thanks…… It was a great experience."
How the hell was I supposed to know that?!
"The monster screams echoing every night are like the sweetest lullaby. And the byproducts bring in nice side income too."
"O~hoho! See, killing monsters isn't the only way wa yo."
Gerda was laughing over drinks with the village chief. She'd captured all the monsters, nailed them to the walls, and harvested their magic stones when they regrew. Every time limbs or jaws regenerated, villagers sliced them off with kitchen knives, and the immobilized monsters became kids' toys. Their constant agonized shrieks kept other monsters and bandits away, apparently. So everything but actually killing them was fine?
Damn it, why was everyone so damn competent?
"Vivi, it's nice seeing your face so often now that you're at the reception desk!"
"Eek……!"
As I swallowed my frustration, a female guild member approached and placed her hand on my butt.
"P-please don't……."
"Hm? You resisting? Don't like it when big sis does this?"
"It's not that, but if others see—"
"Guild members aren't 'others.' We're family. Everyone's gone now anyway—what's the harm?"
"Ugh…… I'm busy right now…… Ah……!"
The women on break swarmed me, groping freely. When they tried lifting my shirt, I resisted a little, but I couldn't match their strength.
"……Ahem."
The Maries pretended to be busy with work, ignoring my plight. Seeing them do nothing while their boss was in trouble stung a bit. In Labyrinth City, where the strong made the rules, even an acting vice guild master like me—a weakling—could only be toyed with by the powerful.
On the flip side, if a guy like me tried throwing his weight around doing the same…… he wouldn't get away unscathed…… right……?
……Huh……?
A truly vicious plan began forming in my head. Suicidal, maybe, but this could finally get me expelled for sure.