The Grand Heist - 6
"The Shadowless Divine Thief has struck again!"
"Again? Right on the heels of the Provincial Governor?"
"The Governor was ages ago! Several more houses have been hit since then!"
The Shadowless Divine Thief's spree of audacity showed no sign of ending. If anything, the Provincial Governor had merely been the overture. The thief sent advance notices to mock the rich, then vaulted their walls in brazen defiance to steal whatever they treasured most — and then, of all things, robbed the wealthy to provide for the poor.
He didn't so much as blink at the curses hurled his way, while the ghouls who had once raked in money like starving spirits now trembled in fear. All because of a single thief.
The people of Wuhan had no choice but to keep their ears glued, day after day, to the latest news of the thief's advance notices.
"What's a Shadowless Divine Thief?"
"Kid — don't tell me you haven't even read Tale of the Wind and Cloud Chivalric Hero?"
"Pardon?"
"Run straight to Daseogak this instant and start with Tale of the Wind and Cloud Chivalric Hero!"
"Author Hopil truly is remarkable. Who would have thought he could redeem a common thief and turn him to righteous banditry?"
"Isn't that precisely what makes him so great!"
The thief called the Shadowless Divine Thief had, so the story went, read Hopil's novel, been moved by it, and become a righteous bandit. Even those who had first wondered what nonsense the government office was spouting in its official announcement found themselves nodding along once they'd read the novel for themselves.
"The complete set of Tale of the Wind and Cloud Chivalric Hero, if you please!"
"Which of your books has the Shadowless Divine Thief in them?! I'll take every last one!"
And so Daseogak, thanks to everything unfolding across Wuhan, became the most crowded place in the entire city.
"You heard they've been delivering rice to the poor village, a whole sack to each household? A note written on black paper was left at the grain shop, saying to buy as much rice as the money left behind would cover and hand it out!"
"That's not the half of it! Money was found piled up in the home of that physician who treats patients for nothing — with a note telling him to brew medicine with it!"
"There has never been a thief like this in all the world! Is the Shadowless Divine Thief a chivalrous hero or a righteous bandit?"
"I couldn't speak to the hero part, but the bandit part seems certain!"
"Redistribution of wealth, no less! Robbing the pig-fat rich to fill the bellies of the poor!"
"I only wish the Shadowless Divine Thief would pay that bastard's house a visit too."
"They say another of the thief's advance notices just flew in. I suppose Branch Manager Kang will be stepping up once more."
And as the Shadowless Divine Thief's legend spread through Wuhan, so did rumors of a certain constable.
"Branch Manager Kang? Why him?"
"You haven't heard about the Provincial Governor? Word is Constable Kang predicted the very route the thief would use to break in."
"What?! Is that true?"
"They say the Hyeoncheol trading tycoon brushed off the advice of a black-haired foreigner — and got robbed blind for it."
"So the rumors of a legendary constable were no idle boasting after all."
The ghost ship case, the mansion murder case, the sweeping capture of the false Shadowless Divine Thieves — this legendary constable, sprung from nowhere, was now closing in on the real one. People began chiming in on the delicious matchup, each adding a piece of their own.
"Last time, every single house was hit except the one Branch Manager Kang had advised."
"Is the Shadowless Divine Thief wary of Branch Manager Kang, then?"
"He's at least mindful of him. Word is even the advised house got robbed — on the very day Constable Kang was off at another mansion that had received an advance notice!"
"Did you hear about the time the Shadowless Divine Thief and Constable Kang actually crossed paths at night?"
"What's this now?"
"Constable Kang predicted the thief's route yet again, and again nobody believed him. So he swore he'd prove it — stood guard all alone in the dead of night! And in the middle of that night, someone came up to him and said that if he dared interfere any further, they wouldn't let it slide!"
"Good heavens! Was it the Shadowless Divine Thief?"
"I'll have you yet, thief! The mansion guards came running at the sound of the scuffle — and by then, a thoroughly rattled Shadowless Divine Thief had already vanished!"
"A duel between a legendary constable and a phantom thief! Why, it's every bit as thrilling as Dang Jeong versus Unhyeon!"
"It's hardly on that level. Every rich house that got a notice still ended up robbed, after all."
"Doesn't that just mean the future Constable Kang has as much promise as the future Unhyeon!"
"They say whenever one of the thief's notices flies in these days, everyone runs straight to Constable Kang. And rumor has it the mansion owners have been bidding against one another right in front of him — haggling over how much it would take for him to come to their house first!"
The phantom thief called the Shadowless Divine Thief, and his one and only rival: the legendary constable Kang Yunho.
The more the world chattered about the thief, the more often the name of Constable Kang was on every lip — and each time the thief sent an advance notice to some rich house, dozens, sometimes hundreds of copies of Tale of the Wind and Cloud Chivalric Hero flew off the shelves.
"Y-you're taking the secret ledger to an Imperial Inspector?"
Lady Jegal tilted her head at me, clearly wondering whether she had misheard.
"The Chief Constable is said to be on friendly terms with an Imperial Inspector. I intend to ask him for an introduction."
If a constable was the police, then an Imperial Inspector was the prosecutor. Men of the same trade, bound to look out for one another — play my cards right, and he might just pull a few strings for me.
"I know an Imperial Inspector looks into official corruption, but is this truly wise? He might decide I'm somehow mixed up in it all."
Lady Ha Yeon asked, arms crossed, worry plain upon her face.
"I've arranged things so that no one in the world could ever suspect me. Besides — I intend to say the ledger was a gift from the Shadowless Divine Thief."
"A-are you out of your mind? What happens if this goes wrong?!"
Lady Ha Yeon hurried over and seized my sleeve, as if demanding to know what lunacy had seized me this time.
"That is precisely why I've spent all this effort building your reputation into a proper story."
It was not for nothing that I'd spent days upon days rehearsing with Lady Ha Yeon.
"A reputation, built into a story?"
It seemed the two women gazing at me with such anxious faces would need a fuller explanation before they understood.
How to put this…
"A phantom thief hurling his challenge at a world gone rotten! Ahh! And barring his path at every turn — a legendary constable, black-haired, handsome as a painting, with the cold, incisive mind of a master detective! Again and again the two collide! Until at last each acknowledges the other as his one true match!"
Nothing beats an old street storyteller's craft at moments like this.
The instant I launched into the act with deliberately exaggerated voice and flourishes, Lady Ha Yeon curled her lips into a wry smile — here he goes, scheming something again — while Lady Jegal watched me with unconcealed fascination.
"I'm not sure the 'cold, incisive mind' part quite fits."
"And you're not quibbling with any of the other parts?"
"Well, those are……"
Lady Ha Yeon nodded with an odd, unreadable expression.
Hold on. You're ruining my immersion here. Fine — I'll explain it quickly.
"Gah! You thieving wretch! Wh-what is this?"
A moonlit night. Our story opens on a constable overflowing with passion, though still green as spring grass.
"Take it."
The Shadowless Divine Thief passed something over, eyes glinting with interest. I twisted my body left and right, playing both men at once.
"You, I could trust with this."
"Th-this is the Provincial Governor's secret ledger?!"
"I suppose I'm not the only one sickened by this rotten world."
"You mean for me to expose the Provincial Governor?"
"What you do with it is your own affair. Farewell."
With that, I turned fully into the thief's form and melted into the darkness, bringing the first act to a close.
"Woooow. I do believe you're even better than the storytellers they hire for the feasts!"
Lady Jegal wore much the same expression she had whenever she sang the praises of my novels, and her hands came together in easy, natural applause.
"Mm. That was the tale from the end of volume three of Tale of the Wind and Cloud Chivalric Hero, wasn't it. I-is there more where that came from?"
Lady Ha Yeon applauded along as well, evidently delighted at how dashing a figure she cut in the tale.
"As for the next installment — I'll be off to make it happen directly."
My storyteller's touch hasn't rusted one bit. Under the lavish praise of two beauties, my shoulders squared themselves without any help from me.
"I take your meaning, but will the Imperial Inspector truly suspect nothing?"
"There's no need to fret so much. He's famous as one of the realm's incorruptible officials, and I hear he grinds his teeth at the mere mention of the Provincial Governor. Put a secret ledger of the Governor's in front of him? He'll lose his mind over it."
"Then have it your way."
With both women's assent secured, I headed straight for the government office and the Chief Constable.
"Uuurgh."
The Wuhan government office. A man who looked to have only recently crossed his thirtieth year crouched haggard over a basin, grimly inspecting the remains of everything he had eaten the day before.
"My lord Inspector. How many days has it been now? Just how many cups did you put away last night?"
His assisting clerk spoke as he surveyed the sorry sight with open disdain.
"It's a world too bitter to face sober. A man must borrow the strength of drink from time to time, no? Drink today, drink again tomorrow."
"Keep this up and you'll be dismissed for neglecting your duties."
"And what of it if I am?"
Any official worth his salt would dread dismissal above all things, yet the Inspector muttered on as though the notion didn't concern him in the slightest.
"My lord Inspector……"
"I investigated with all diligence and reported the Provincial Governor's corruption to the throne. And do you know what the court said?"
"What did they say?"
"They told me not to slander a Governor of such renown with evidence that wouldn't hold water! Not only was there no reward — I came within a hair of losing my post!"
After drinking as much as he had last night, he still craved more. Only drink, it seemed, could smother the rage seething in his gut. The Inspector beat at his stifling chest, for all the good it did.
"He is the Provincial Governor, after all."
He had simply picked the wrong opponent.
A bottom-rung Imperial Inspector who had only just scraped through the examinations and taken up his post — daring to lay hands on the mightiest Governor in the realm.
Even an Inspector empowered to report directly to the Emperor: once a matter went up before the court, the outcome was as plain as day.
"Had any other official committed misdeeds like the Governor's, he wouldn't be walking away with all four limbs intact. And yet the court and the whole world laugh at me — not at him."
The young official who had thrown himself into exposing the Governor's corruption more fervently than anyone alive was now made to taste a despair every bit as vast as his passion had been.
"I wash my hands of it. Do as you please."
The clerk knew better than anyone how driven the Inspector had once been. He heaved a sigh and rose from his seat.
"Where are you off to? If you have a moment to spare, could you not mix me a little honey water?"
"Constable Kang is coming to give his statement on the Shadowless Divine Thief case. They say a clerk is required."
"Constable Kang? Ah…… that black-haired constable? Hard lines for him too, I suppose. Try as he might to stand in the thief's way, the houses get robbed all the same. He must be the laughingstock of the town."
"You drink too much to know how things stand these days, my lord. The people of Wuhan praise Constable Kang to the very heavens."
"They praise him?"
The Inspector's brow twitched.
"When a man shows he is giving his utmost in his own field, people praise him even in failure. Oh! Did you know? The Shadowless Divine Thief robbed the Provincial Governor's house as well."
"Heh heh. So that was my drinking snack the other night."
The Inspector laughed, recalling why his cup had tasted so sweet for once.
"Constable Kang is reporting on the Governor affair today, they say. You would hear at first hand how the Governor came to take to his sickbed on account of the Shadowless Divine Thief. If buying a meal for the clerk who was meant to sit in lets you sit there in his place — I'd call that a bargain worth taking."
He would get to hear, right at his own elbow, the tale of the Governor's comeuppance?
In the eyes of the Inspector — listless about everything under heaven — a spark of drive shot through, one he couldn't even remember ever possessing.
"How much would this meal cost?"
"I beg your pardon?"
"I'll give you two silver. Let me sit in for you."
Never again would he look after this man. The clerk's face crumpled into a mask of grief.
"Just play dumb and……"
"That would be a problem."
"Chief Constable!"
Why was the Chief Constable out in front of the office? I waved a hand and made my way over, where he stood talking with someone at a distance.
"There you are. You've had a hard time of it lately."
"I'm sorry I haven't been by to show my face more often."
"Nonsense. No one can order a busy man about. You're headed to my office, I take it?"
"I was just on my way. But — who might this be?"
He didn't look like any constable. I stole a glance at the man feigning indifference in the corner and put the question to the Chief Constable.
"Ah, that's…… a clerk! Clerk! When our friend here gives his account today, you'll sit beside him and take down everything he says."
"A clerk?"
"A pleasure to make your acquaintance, Constable Kang. Just call me Clerk Jeong."
Huh? I nodded along and studied the man's face.
He looked to be around thirty, dressed so shabbily he could have passed for the lowliest clerk of the lowest rank. Constables worked in the field, so it was hardly strange to bring along a scribe to write up a case report, but——
Why is this man here?
I knew him.
The true identity of the official standing before me: an Imperial Inspector — the man who reported official corruption straight to the Emperor's ear.
And no, it was not because he was the very man I had been planning to ask the Chief Constable to introduce me to.
I had never once laid eyes on the Wuhan Imperial Inspector's face. There was no way I could have picked him out of a crowd on sight.
And yet I knew exactly who this man was.
There was no possibility of my failing to recognize him.
Why is the Imperial Inspector from the Imperial Princess route standing right here?