The Chairwoman Receives Her Punishment
Rine pressed a hand to her forehead and let out a long sigh. “Haa, this is just ridiculous…”
She walked over to the front door and slammed her body against it. Thud!Thud! But the door didn’t budge an inch. The title of Grand Sage apparently wasn’t just for show—the intricate violet barrier of magical power woven between the door and its frame felt sturdier than any bunker. She could at least understand that the chairwoman hadn’t won her position in a poker game…
On the living room sofa sat Arthur, Rohan, and Teresa, who had come downstairs after hearing the commotion at the crack of dawn. They stared with dazed expressions.
“What’s going on, Miss Rine? I thought I heard someone calling for the chairwoman from outside just now.”
“Well, it’s…”
Rine carefully placed the pink sheet of paper she’d been holding onto the table. The three of them read it at once, and their faces crumpled in unison.
Youths of Pinecone Villa!
If you do not establish three dormitory rules by the end of today, the door will not open!
“What kind of childish, disgusting prank is this? Breathing the same air as that crazy zealot nun is already revolting, and now we have to make rules together?”
“Shut that filthy mouth of yours, you heretical scum. Your very existence is the greatest threat and blight upon Pinecone Villa.”
The sparks flying between their glares from the very start of the morning drained Rine’s energy. She cleared her throat and stepped between them.
“A-anyway… if we don’t fill this out, we’ll be trapped here all day. Today’s my first day working at the secretary’s office! If I get fired, I won’t have any living expenses! So please, everyone, use your heads!”
At Rine’s desperate shout, Rohan clicked his tongue and folded his arms first. But he clearly didn’t want to look at Teresa, because his eyes stayed fixed solely on Rine.
“Rotating household chores. Cleaning, grocery shopping, that sort of thing—assign one guy and one girl per shift and take turns. Tell that insane zealot over there what I just said.”
“…”
Suddenly turned into a human messenger, Rine cautiously turned her head toward Teresa.
“…He says that?”
“Hmph. A surprisingly reasonable suggestion. Very well. Then please convey to that heretical curry bastard standing over there that we should split the shared living expenses exactly n ways, Miss Rine.”
“…She says that?”
These were supposed to be the talents who would lead the continent’s future. Rine felt tears welling up at the thought that she had to play this childish game of telephone—the kind even her rural elementary school had considered too immature.
“There’s no need to split living expenses. My house is practically rolling in gold bars, so I can cover everything myself if necessary.”
Rohan haughtily jingled his accessories and lifted his chin, but both Rine and Arthur immediately shook their heads in protest.
“No way! No matter how rich you are, if one person pays for everything, they’ll start subtly throwing their weight around and treating the rest of us like servants later! Back in the countryside, the village head said he’d cover everything and ended up making the young men work in the fields all day!”
“I agree. Owing someone a debt goes against a knight’s honor.”
Rohan looked slightly taken aback but yielded without much fuss. Teresa didn’t seem particularly opposed either, so the first two rules were settled easily.
Rule 1. Household chores will be shared equally among all four residents and operated on a rotating duty system, unless someone is ill or has a special reason.
Rule 2. Shared living expenses will be divided exactly according to the number of residents and deposited on the last Sunday of every month.
“By the way, whose account should we use for the deposits?”
“Let’s use Miss Rine’s account.”
At Arthur’s question, both Rohan and Teresa pointed at Rine without the slightest hesitation.
“Huh? My account? Why?”
“Because no idiot in this entire academy would dare steal money from the ‘Actual Madwoman.’ I guarantee your account will be safer than the royal treasury.”
“I concur. Even demons don’t touch the wallets of crazy people.”
‘…These bastards are serious.’
Rine felt a surge of anger but held it in. The label of “crazy bitch” that had been slapped on her since the very first day of the academy entrance ceremony clearly wasn’t going away anytime soon.
‘What should we make the third rule…’
As she pondered, the image of the purple-haired chairwoman—wearing a mask, hiding in the bushes, and grinning while peering through a telescope—flashed through her mind. As a bonus, an indescribable, deep-seated rage welled up from the bottom of her heart.
‘Forcing boys and girls to live together, shoving us into a dormitory with zero soundproofing, drooling over every chance to ship us together… that disgusting, romance-obsessed chairwoman…’
The pink youth she wanted? Secretive, tingling glances? A powerful countermeasure to completely crush those annoying schemes popped into her head, so she pressed the pen down hard.
“Huh? Miss Rine? What did you write for the third rule?”
Rule 3. All romantic relationships between men and women within Pinecone Villa are strictly forbidden.
“…”
Rohan sucked in a sharp breath and ground his teeth.
“Hah, as if. If I dated that crazy zealot, I’d chop my own hand off.”
“I have zero interest in dirtying my hands with a heretic. The mere thought of making eye contact with that wicked creature disgusts me, so I wholeheartedly approve of this rule.”
“M-me too! I haven’t even gotten married yet, and I have absolutely no desire to date in such a terrifying place! A student’s duty is to study, after all!”
The moment all four of them reached unanimous agreement, the pink paper on the table began to tremble violently, emitting a red glow. It looked ready to reject the rules and change “romance forbidden” into “romance forbidden forbidden.”
“Whoa! The paper’s starting to burn!”
Thud!
Rine mercilessly slammed her fist on the table, then pressed her palm down hard on the glowing pink paper, crushing it.
“All four of us agreed, so stop resisting!!!”
Strength was the power to forcefully push through one’s own will! The terrifying spirit that could make even wild boars from the countryside flee in terror surged through her palm. With a sharp ziiing, the red magical power in the pink paper faded helplessly.
Slither.
Finally admitting defeat, the paper glowed with a golden light and transformed into an official “Dormitory Rule Contract,” settling quietly onto the table. At the same time, the stubbornly locked front door of Pinecone Villa swung open with a heavy clunk.
“Wow, it opened!”
“…You truly possess incredible spirit, Miss Rine.”
Arthur clapped, cold sweat dripping down his face, while Rohan and Teresa slowly backed away, looking utterly fed up. Rine smiled victoriously and carefully tucked the golden contract into her pocket.
“I’m late, I’m late!”
Even with her sturdy country-girl legs, the fifth floor of the academy’s main building was ridiculously high. To be late on her very first day because of the chairwoman’s absurd barrier imprisonment stunt!
Panting heavily, she flung open the door to the chairwoman’s office—and froze on the spot.
The highest authority in the academy = the chairwoman.
So why on earth was that very chairwoman on her knees, scrubbing the floor with a wet mop? She was even cleaning her own statue. As an added bonus, a sign hung around her neck.
I will not arbitrarily infringe upon the students’ freedom of residence.
“Ugh… uuuugh. Secretary, you still haven’t shaken off those harsh habits from your knight commander days? Abusing this frail Grand Sage like this—where did my human rights go?”
“Be quiet. Every drop of water left on the floor adds another hour, Chairwoman. Lower your hips.”
There were times when the mind simply went blank.
“You’ve arrived, Miss Rine.”
Karl, impeccably dressed, adjusted his glasses with a finger as he greeted her. Rine quietly pulled the contract from her pocket. Since the chairwoman was in that state, she had to submit it to the secretary general, the next highest authority.
“Excellent. Especially Rule 3—‘Absolute Prohibition of Romance Between Men and Women in Pinecone Villa.’ This provision is perfectly optimized for maintaining the academy’s wholesome academic atmosphere and enforcing proper conduct. Your qualities as a freshman representative truly shine. I believe this should be expanded across the entire academy.”
“Hey!!! Karl!!! That’s invalid!!! Even if all four of us agreed, it still needs the chairwoman’s final approval!”
Elina, who had been scrubbing the floor, thrust her hips up and jumped around in protest. But Karl didn’t even glance back as he slammed the approval stamp onto the contract with a loud thump.
“It’s an excellent rule. And Chairwoman, please finish cleaning the statue.”
“Waaah!!! You dictator!!!”
Rine once again realized with painful clarity who the real power in the chairwoman’s office was.
“Um, Secretary General. So what should I do today?”
Karl smoothly ignored Elina, who was still sniffling and mopping, and guided Rine into the inner office.
“For now, there isn’t any major work that requires you to run around in person, Miss Rine. Normally, the secretary office’s main duty is cleaning up after the major accidents this chairwoman causes…”
Karl cleared his throat.
“You, Miss Rine, are a student representative who belongs to no separate organization like the student council. You purely represent the opinions of the first-year students. You fall under the secretary office’s jurisdiction. Your primary duties are very simple. You will help me keep an appropriate watch over whether the chairwoman is about to cause another ridiculous incident, and if she does, you will assist with the cleanup.”
“Surveillance and cleanup?”
“Yes. The chairwoman does occasionally act her age and pull childish stunts like this, but in truth she is someone who has saved countless lives. She possesses incredibly deep and noble intentions. So even if her actions are irritating, I ask that you understand her with generosity.”
It was true that the heroic face engraved on the statue didn’t quite match the little kid currently scrubbing the floor.
“Then let’s start today’s work with this. Please sort these piled-up letters by dormitory. The recipient’s location is written on each envelope, so it shouldn’t be difficult.”
Karl set down a thick bundle of dozens of letters on the table. Hmm. She had done similar tasks fairly often while working under old man Gorky. It seemed the old man really had been quite an important figure. Let’s see… a familiar name on one of the letters…
Sender: Nikolai Gorky, Cultural Protection People's Commissioner
Recipient: Rine
Rine, it's not too late yet. You are the one destined to become the destroyer and creator of the rock spirit that will lead the Empire's popular music. Escape from the pit of those classical music geezers, grab a guitar immediately. I will make you great. Your master awaits your reply...
Without a moment’s hesitation, Rine folded the letter in half and held it up to Karl.
“Secretary General! How should we handle letters that disturb the academy’s wholesome atmosphere?”
“You may throw them into the brazier in the back.”
At Karl’s crisp verdict, Rine’s face brightened. She tossed old man Gorky’s letter straight into the fire. Watching the flames roar up, she felt a strange sense of catharsis.
By the time she had finished sorting the letters—including the incineration of spam mail—the office door burst open with a bang. Elina, who had hurled the mop into the far corner, slid across the sofa and collapsed onto it.
“Puuhaaa! Cleaning complete! Karl, can I take this sign off now? My neck bones feel like they’re about to snap!”
“Well done, Chairwoman. In the future, please refrain from even dreaming of things like unauthorized dormitory confinement.”
When Karl removed the sign, Elina cracked her neck from side to side and let out a groan.
“Thank you for your hard work on your first day, Miss Rine. That’s all for today’s tasks, so you may head home now. Return to the dormitory and rest.”
“Ah, thank you! See you tomorrow!”
Rine quickly grabbed her bag and practically fled the chairwoman’s office.
Click.
The door closed, leaving only Karl and Elina in the spacious office. Elina rolled around on the sofa for a while, then her slender stomach let out a loud grumble. She puffed her cheeks out in annoyance.
“Karl, I’m hungry.”
“That’s only natural after skipping a proper breakfast and then cleaning. Shall I order the highest-grade meal from the academy’s exclusive restaurant?”
At the question, Elina flinched and averted her gaze, feeling as if her throat had suddenly closed up.
“Are you planning to go through the leftover food bins again?”
Elina folded her arms tightly in front of her chest with an obviously sulky expression.
“…No, I’m not?! Why would I dig through leftover bins! I’m a Grand Sage! A hero of the continent!”
Even as she said that, her eyes darted furtively toward the potted plant in the corner of the office or Karl’s pocket. She desperately needed some odorless dry bread crusts or weeds she could eat.
Karl knew all too well what this foolish, wounded hero was afraid of, and exactly what he needed to do right now. He placed a hand on his leather bag and moved.