Chapter 102
Chapter 102
Saint, You’re So Vulgar! – Chapter 102
The church order hadn't changed a bit after their long journey home. The atmosphere remained solemn, and the priests going about their business seemed leisurely as ever.
Halia and Diego vanished right away. Off to hunt down some documents.
"You lot unpack first. You've had a rough trip."
"We can help..."
"No need. With that curse hanging over you, better not push your luck with fatigue piling up. Besides, those scholars over there will find what we need way faster!"
The gist of his hearty laugh was basically, 'I'll work the scholars to the bone.'
Well, Halia and books just didn't mix, that was true.
The two strode off purposefully.
Asher, left behind, turned to Versia.
"Then we'll head back too."
"Yeah, we should."
First things first: unpack and take it easy today. Tomorrow, they'd drop by Judith's to check on the curse.
On the way to their quarters, priests greeted them warmly.
Asher returned the greetings with a refreshing smile.
But that cheer lasted only a moment.
"Sir Terbion! Welcome back!"
"A little gift for you!"
"Ah, thank you."
Female priests popped up here and there, handing Versia snacks and trinkets before scurrying off.
Watching it all made Asher's mood sour, for some reason.
His lips pursed into a pout. His eyes narrowed.
"......"
"...I never asked for them."
"I know."
That was his answer, but Asher's expression soured even more.
It confused him too. He ought to feel pissed about losing to her in masculinity, but instead, it was this nagging jealousy gnawing at him.
The sight of those priestesses fawning over Versia rubbed him the wrong way. It was hard to stomach.
Versia caught him staring. She smirked, a sly, satisfied little chuckle escaping her lips. Imagining what was going through her head made him whip his gaze away. His ears burned red.
"...It's not like that."
"I didn't say anything."
"It's really not...!"
"Told you, I didn't say a word."
She poked his side, and he stomped ahead in a huff.
Back at their quarters, Dalin was the first to greet them.
"Saintess! Sir Terbion! You made it back safe!"
Dalin came bounding over with a beaming smile, just like an affectionate puppy.
Her innocent cheer melted away Asher's grumpiness.
"You holding up okay?"
"Nope! It was so boring without you! But seriously, no injuries? And why'd you lose so much weight?!"
"Haha..."
Playing mercenary had been tough, and those last few days tied up eating nothing but porridge had slimmed him down a bit.
Dalin pouted like she was personally offended. He patted her reassuringly until she calmed, then she took their bags to sort out.
Her usual bustle made the place feel like home.
Asher's shoulders relaxed. He let out a sigh of relief, and Versia piped up.
"Dalin sure made your day, huh? You two were chattering away like besties."
"Wha? No, it's just... I'm in this body, so I'm playing the part! Nothing more."
"Sure, but that was peak girls' talk. Looks like you prefer giggling with the ladies now."
Her smirk was infuriating.
Asher let out a baffled laugh.
Girls' talk? Where she'd picked up that weird phrase was beyond him, but he had plenty to say about it.
"That's a real misunderstanding. Sure, I'm in this body, but my identity's still male! Talking to Dalin was just friends catching up! How was that..."
Asher rattled on, denying it vehemently.
Too badshe hadn't said it hoping for a logical defense.
"Personally, I don't believe in friendship between men and women. If you're calling it pure friendship anyway..."
She'd just wanted to tease him, plain and simple.
"Guess you weren't ever a guy to begin with. You're female to the bone, Knight."
"...!"
"It's cute watching you slowly accept it."
Versia stroked his hair. Asher's eyes narrowed as he snapped.
"Take it back...!"
"Pouty."
"I'm not pouting! And I'm not cute!"
"Right."
Versia was downright devilish.
The thought hit harder every time she smiled like that.
How could his own face pull off an expression like that?
Beyond the shock, it irked him tenfold.
He reached out to swat her, but she pressed a hand to his forehead and extended her arm. The height difference left him flailing at air.
"Eek!"
Versia ended it first.
"Hehe, guess I'll head to my barracks then. Gotta unpack... maybe grab a drink with Marvin. You know, 'manly' chats you can't do."
"I can too!"
"Sure, sure."
She turned away with a teasing lilt.
Just before stepping out the door, she tossed back:
"You didn't swat my hand away this time. You liked it, didn't you?"
"Out!"
Thwack!
He hurled a pillow, but the body betrayed him with perfect reflexes.
It sailed past Versia and smacked the door before sliding down.
Asher trembled with frustration.
* * *
It had been ages since he'd slept in a proper fluffy bed. Compared to that hastily grabbed inn bed in Baern, this was heaven and earth.
He had no clue how he'd conked out. Waking up, he was drooling all over the pillow clutched to his chest.
"Jeez, Saintess, you can't sleep so sloppily!"
Dalin woke him up, and only then did he stir. Washing up was solo now.
That slit running from his lower back up to his shoulder bladeshe couldn't let anyone see it.
Dalin was still bummed, but showing her was out of the question.
Besides, washing this body felt natural now, so no need.
He still consciously avoided looking at Versia's skin, but gliding his hands over it didn't faze him anymore.
Progress, right?
Whether it was good progress was another story.
That was his morning.
Versia showed up right after breakfast.
A faint whiff of boozeshe'd clearly knocked back a few with Marvin last night.
"You hear? Marvin's got a crush on some priestess these days."
"......"
"Came to me for love advice."
Marvin, who'd never opened up to him like that? It stung like betrayal.
But showing hurt meant losing. Asher played it cool.
Versia's stifled giggles grated, but he ignored them.
The day's schedule kicked off like that.
It wasn't easy.
"If you're gonna do it, why not go all out? Worship that slit all day, suck it dry. Don't just tease it drop by drop."
They'd gone to Judith to manage the curse. After checking the yin's length, that was her opener.
Asher hung his head.
Unfair. Versia was the one who'd turned it into this mess, so why was he taking the heat?
"What, premarital purity or something? That's why you only went from behind? Halfway growth?"
"N-No, it's not...!"
"Then why raise your voice like you're innocent?"
"......"
Hoo, Judith exhaled smoke. Her irritated face, dark circles even while they were away in Baern, she'd burned the midnight oil on this. Anyone could see she looked wrecked.
Feeling guilty, Asher held his tongue.
Judith addressed him.
"Medicine's got limits. We'll need spells or magic for the rest. I'll amp up the suppression for now. Looking into ways to shrink it step by step too."
"Yes'm..."
"Please, just hold out. Jerk off if you have to. Okay?"
"Not gonna..."
He mumbled back as she prescribed meds.
Afterward, they shared details on meeting Sera Wizdia in person, plus everything else from Baern.
Judith perked up especially at Sera's ancient prayer technique.
"Wonder if that could mess with the curse..."
She looked lost in thought.
Asher thanked her and left the lab.
Versia waited outside, flashing her usual sly grin.
"All good?"
"...I got chewed out because of you, Saintess."
"Sorry. I'll be good."
Things never went smoothly.
Asher sighed heavily.